time to kill dennis perrin tweets

honestly i'm confused that any of you can still bear to discuss politics at all, y'all have stronger stomachs than me, salud!

TBF discussing politics has been way easier since that thing a few years back where the incessant stress of doing so finally shut down my organic corpus and necessitated an upload of my consciousness into a crude mechanical body comprised mostly of wire hangers and soup cans. I literally have a cast iron stomach for that shizz nowadays.

LOL, just saw the post that likely prompted this thread. Perrin is basically what happened when '80s Dennis Miller tried to teleport himself across the room but tragically failed to notice that someone's lame and underinformed dad had time-travelled from our era directly into his telepod.

wait the dad time-travelled into the inside of a telepod that miller was about to use to teleport across a room?

yes but it's the only interesting aspect of the story

the real tragedy here is that people are still allowed to embed Trump tweets

Splitting the option to turn off images from embedding tweets/youtube would be a welcome change to user preferences tbh

this is by far the best option IMO - split it into images/YT links/tweets

“dominated” is a weird thing when half those embeds are primary sources for breaking news

Half a percent maybe!

trumps tweets are at least funny tho

u guys r just jealous cause morbs found "his guy"

― lag∞n, Friday, January 17, 2020 8:19 AM (two hours ago)

otm

in the future we all have a guy and our conversations will be 100% reposting tweets

dibs on Chuck Grassley

look forward to all of my ILM posts suddenly looking like this:

Enjoyed teaching new EU Trade Commissioner Hogan abt how I’m a laboratory for how GMOs won’t kill you since I’ve been eating Iowa corn & soybeans my whole life https://t.co/hPmBrjx9Sc

— ChuckGrassley (@ChuckGrassley) January 15, 2020

THREAD: the new Algiers album

NED: this is great
ufo: agreed
DJP:

Only in washington would FISA court hope to restore credibility after FISA abuse by hiring Kris a person who publicly denied FISA abuse ever happened to oversee reforms If u want to improve public confidence+ prevent civil liberties violations dont hire fox to fix henhouse!!!

— ChuckGrassley (@ChuckGrassley) January 14, 2020

HOOS is more my guy, i assume u ppl check his twitter feed

I might let you have Chuck, but I feel like I have a better claim

HOOS is definitely excellent

I’m claiming Danielle Steel

come get this meat(loaf) #SeduceSomeoneIn4Words

— Boston Market (@bostonmarket) January 16, 2020

@worstblobby has gone downhill since this tbh, i need a new guy:

BLOBY IS BALLS DEEP IN 2017

— Mr. Blobby (@WorstBlobby) January 1, 2017

If Bobby Gillespie is on twitter that's my guy.

Know we take comments like yours very seriously. So we can best help, we would like to gather your contact information and have someone reach out to you personally. Can you please send us a DM with your phone number and best time to reach you?

— Windex (@Windex) November 6, 2019

Damn, omitted the most important part:

This is @justshitpoasts' mom, I just arrived home and found him dead lying next to an empty bottle of @Windex😰 - I've called the cops, @CNN and my lawyers. You will be hearing from us. https://t.co/1JazjMGFRk

— justshitpoasts🍪 (@justshitpoasts) November 6, 2019

Report unsafe products on https://t.co/qFWdMF6Xk0 pic.twitter.com/1nNl2HCRoT

— US Consumer Product Safety Commission (@USCPSC) January 17, 2020

We can have another thread if necessary to advertise sub-jerky boys fare that would call for the eradication of Twitter rather than its banishing from ILX, those would do fine there.

It's so cool that Chuck Grassley tweets like my worst students write!!

Fred and I hit a deer on hiway 136 south of Dyersville. After I pulled fender rubbing on tire we continued to farm. Assume deer dead

— ChuckGrassley (@ChuckGrassley) October 26, 2012

xp what are their feelings on Dairy Queen?

pretty sure im taking "assume deer dead" to the grave

At Hy-Vee Classic bb games sitting near couple who owns the Dairy Queen in Windsor Heights where I go for you know what. Yum.

— ChuckGrassley (@ChuckGrassley) December 16, 2017

it never occurred to me, but what if the DQ franchisee is a big Grassley donor? maybe this has been sponcon all along

@ChuckGrassley Followers legitimately asked about condition of dear that attacked our Prius I didn't hv a flashlight to check on critter

— ChuckGrassley (@ChuckGrassley) October 27, 2012

I hate him but on Twitter he is a treasure

xp: okay clearly Grassley fucks at the DQ

the Dairy Queen in Windsor Heights where I go for you know what. Yum.

Why would a politician in this day and age ever so willingly open himself to innuendo and speculation in this manner

lol, xpost

more like HARD SERVE, amirite

I've gone to that location multiple times to check for illicit activity but found only a well-crafted Blizzard

if the weather wasn't so bad right now I'd go again. all this talk is making me hungry

A butterscotch cone going down on Grassley in the parking lot mmm

hell i'm might give this a try

Last night I dreamt about the end of the world which I survived to be tortured by faceless security forces. Tonight I hope for something with guaranteed health care.

— Dennis Perrin (@DennisThePerrin) January 10, 2020

damn feels good, i see why morbs does it

thats morbs guy tho

Powerless people who trash each other in comment threads depress me, but then I think of ice cream, and then vegans, and it starts again.

— Dennis Perrin (@DennisThePerrin) January 6, 2015

brb, setting up a "WHO SAID IT: Dennis Perrin or Chuck Grassley?" quiz

is Perrin quoting CSNY?

xp poll plz

Perrin or Grassley? captcha on the ilx login

remember what tha homie nietsche said y'all "whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster"

— Xeni Jardin (@xeni) June 14, 2016

ilx wholeheartedly embracing perrin and posting him nonstop might actually be the only way to break morbs of the habit

loll

pic.twitter.com/h6v5jKOQHB

— denise perkins (@lucasmurphy62) June 9, 2019

“If you think about it, everything is created from the inside out. Think of the seed from which the plant grows, the embryo that gives rise to the fully developed infant, even the building that emerges from the… https://t.co/2cFsvgAUvL

— Dennis Perrin (@perrinpainter) January 17, 2020

pennis derrin

US Politics, April 2020 -- Where's the Vax Returns?