effects of doing nothing in a sporting competition: a comparative study

Or wait, maybe the receiving team would retain possession, but it would have to start from a snap from where the guy was standing at the end of the first quarter

If the ball is live when the clock runs out it remains live until the play is over.

https://youtube/QXOKsJViHtY

I wouldn't say it's "doing nothing", as it is part of the strategy, but the surplace in cycling deserves a mention. Specifically the 'longest lap', where "doing nothing" is the sport: you lose if you can't stand still.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sUjgKeO7YtQ

The jury will now put a stop to cyclists standing still for too long, but this didn't used to be the case. As psychological warfare in a race against each other, Antonio Maspes and Jan Derksen in 1955 stood still on their bikes for over 32 minutes before they finally started their race.

No mention of cricket yet? Batsmen are often complimented for not playing the ball, prompting appreciative shouts of "Well left!".

In cricket, a batsman leaving a delivery that has been bowled is still a choice and an act of participation. What you should be wondering is what happens if the fielding team refuse to bowl a ball. I think what happens is that the umpires give penalty runs to the batting side and in extreme cases can announce the game forfeit (as happened to Pakistan in around 2010)

The most famous example in football is probably 'the Disgrace of Gijon' where Germany and Austria colluded to get the only result (a 1-0 win for Germany) that would see them both qualify for the next round of the 1982 World Cup. Germany scored after ten minutes and they just noodled about for the remaining eighty.

There was an argument at the time that this constituted match-fixing, which is against the rules of the sport, but the authorities decided that they hadn't done anything illegal. However, there was at least the pretense of playing a game - they weren't literally standing there and doing nothing.

The only way two teams could not touch the ball after kick-off would be through agreement between themselves - which would probably provide enough evidence of collusion to bring it within the scope of match-fixing, unless it was done as some kind of protest. A referee can suspend / abandon a match at their discretion if they feel the laws of the sport are not being adhered to. It's not absolutely explicit that suspected match fixing would be covered but the likelihood would be that the game would be called off by the ref earlier than the full 90 minutes.

Though to get to that scenario they'd still have to have the opening kickoff.

i assume there's a play clock on the opening kickoff, meaning you could go into the zeno scenario with no one doing anything or the game clock ever starting

In NFL football a team that refused to snap the ball would be repeatedly penalized five yards for "delay of game" until they were within five yards of their own goal line at which point the penalty would become "half the distance to the goal line" and this distance would get smaller and smaller down to the subatomic level and then quantum mechanics would be disrupted and the universe would explode.

yea I've pulled this off in Madden before

Slightly derailment but, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/One_team_in_Tallinn

The match was abandoned after three seconds because the Estonian team were absent from the Kadrioru Stadium due to a dispute over its floodlights.

It does raise an interesting question for football / soccer - if a player goes over to take a corner / free kick and spends too long taking it, to slow down the game, they'd get booked for time wasting and, with repetition, sent off. If nobody goes over to take the corner / free kick, who'd get booked and how would play re-start?

I don't know much about UFC history, but there was this:
https://www.bloodyelbow.com/2013/2/4/3951260/ufc-history-severn-vs-shamrock-2-what-really-happened-at-ufc-9

In high school and collegiate wrestling, competitors are warned for stalling and after a fourth warning get disqualified, so I guess both would be disqualified if neither attempted to wrestle during a match.

I think the rules are similar in boxing -- neither fighter boxing would produce a double disqualification and a result of no contest.

at some point somebody is going to post this video, and it might as well be me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6PxRwgjzZw