Least promising Sequel/Remake/Franchise Flick of 2020

Dolittle

... actually, this one

The second most horrific trailer in front of Cats, though the fact that I'd seen it already dulled the impact

Yeah, I saw a trailer for that last week. It looked pretty dire.

Feels like we've reached the point where there's no real interest on the part of many rightsholders in whether people are asking for a particular sequel or remake or adaptation. Just like 'shit, this goddamn Cookie Crisp IP is just sitting here gathering dust, let's get those 'Johnny Johnny Yes Papa' fuckers from the YouTubes to blast a feature-length CGI dook for us'.

wow the dolittle trailer starts off with a moody cover of "what a wonderful world" lmao i hate music AND movies

Dolittle will at least produce some amusing behind-the-scenes fodder, given how cursed its production has supposedly been

Dolittle feels very much like Downey asking himself the question 'what kind of bullshit would I be doing right now if my career hadn't been miraculously revived a decade back?'

He has to be rich as hell rn. I just...don't understand it. At all.

I may have said this elsewhere but it's incredible the extent to which it feels like one of the fake trailers from Tropic Thunder, right down to the dodgy accent.

I like how off-the-wall some of these titles are if you don't know the original, e.g. Brahms: The Boy II, The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard

i have voluntarily seen the boy twice and not even i noticed that a sequel was on this list. v excited for whatever absolute garbage it is though

XPS RDJ has gone full Dolittle. You don't go full Dolittle.

Predict ppl will find it hard to resist voting for morbius

katie holmes apparently stars in brahms: the boy ii, so i will be there opening night

The trailer for Scoob! implies that Scooby-Doo is named after Scooby Snacks and not the other way round, which is infuriating

I have no idea what The Boy is. I had to read a bit of the entry on The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard a bit before including it; The Hitman's Bodyguard sounded vaguely like something I remembered existing, but I couldn't be sure.

I expect to like West Side Story.

The existence of Morbius is stupid as hell but brace yourself for Sony's future forays into even stupider and more pointless adaptations of tertiary Spider-Man characters.

The trailer for Scoob! implies that Scooby-Doo is named after Scooby Snacks and not the other way round, which is infuriating

― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Thursday, January 2, 2020 1:03 PM (seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

Particularly if the movie fails to identify them as Scoobert Snacks.

Based on the trailer, I've got less than zero anticipation of Ghostbusters: Afterlife.

Bill & ted seems to be the one that the most ppl have decided they need to believe will be good; I’ll be pretty surprised if it is, but that goes for most of these

this is the only morbius I know about

http://www.doctorwhotv.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/The-Brain-of-Morbius.jpg

xp: yeah to clarify I will be surprised if the new Bill & Ted is any good, but I do want it to be.

same

the old ones are bad

Me being me, I'm hesitantly excited for Black Widow and Eternals but the MCU thus far was wrapped up in a perfectly satisfactory fashion and I've come to accept that the endeavor can't be maintained forever so I'm happy to move on if subsequent entries turf out.

Literally not one single other thing on this list that conjures more than a 'maybe I'll watch that 5-10 years from now if I happen upon it while flipping through channels' from me.

I mean I want to like them/indulge my fond memories but I tried rewatching the first one recently and it's just not well made, the jokes are clumsy and very obvious etc

xp

Have ppl noticed the same amount of goodwill/benefit of doubt against the odds for coming 2 America?

if you're not excited for the croods 2 i dunno what to tell you

the only one of these I'm remotely interested in seeing is Wonder Woman tbh

worst is def Top Gun

Is The Hitman's Bodyguard that Samuel Jackson/Ryan Reynolds flick? If so, I remember it getting very good word of mouth but barely managing 45 minutes of it before turning it off

The ones I have least animus towards are the 9th sequels to cheap horror properties cause they’re just part of the genre and although rooted in the same kind of cynicism are less grotesque to me than the megabudget monstrosities

I feel like we've had the notion of Top Gun as a pop classic imposed upon us because I don't know that I've ever heard anyone talk about it in glowing terms or cite it among their faves of the era or, like, anything. It's cited ironically quite a bit and that's about it. It's just a thing whose existence people are aware of without having anyone having actual feelings about that awareness. It's the deviled ham of film.

I know top gun stans (my sister for one, in the 90s anyway)

Bill & Ted 3 is pretty much guaranteed to flop which is why I suspect it'll actually be pretty good

last saw the original about 8 years ago, idk I still think it's got some pretty funny bits. 2nd obviously isn't as good but I give 'em credit for doing something adventurous and weird. comedy in general just doesn't age well. maybe I should take this to the challop thread but I bet if you showed Airplane to a 17 year old today they'd probably say something like, "this sucks"

i didn't see airplane! for the first time until maybe eight years ago and few things have made me laugh more but i know that's not the same thing

I expect to like West Side Story.

― temporarily embarrassed thousandaire (Eric H.), Thursday, January 2, 2020 11:08 AM (thirty-three minutes ago)

same

i didn't see airplane! for the first time until maybe eight years ago and few things have made me laugh more but i know that's not the same thing

― american bradass (BradNelson), Thursday, January 2, 2020 11:43 AM (thirty-two seconds ago)

Brad how is it that Airplane made you laugh, I tried to watch it around age 19 and we turned it off because it was so bad, should I try again now that I'm old (30)?

I mean even if I should I probably won't

anyway voted Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard because that's a worse name than Ruth's Chris Steakhouse

I'm honestly struggling to think of a theoretical remake/sequel/adaptation I could potentially get excited about these days. A resurgence of George Miller's franchises, maybe (a third Babe would be delightful)?

https://i.imgur.com/BsNxbK8.jpg

Brad how is it that Airplane made you laugh, I tried to watch it around age 19 and we turned it off because it was so bad, should I try again now that I'm old (30)?

― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Thursday, January 2, 2020 12:44 PM (twenty minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

idk it's possible we have different senses of humor. the recurring "looks like i picked the wrong day to stop [x]" joke is the peak of all comedy for me

When I saw it I was 15 and the film itself was 20 years old, I thought it was hilarious

The other Komedy Klassik that left me completely utterly cold as a teenager was Animal House, what a turd

Oh I’m with you there

The guitar smashing bit made me laugh, found the rest tedious as hell

Now all entertainment is owned by like 3 companies maybe we could have a moratorium on all sequels/remakes/franchises every other year.

I saw a comedy double bill of Airplane 2 the sequel/Monty Python Holy Grail in 1986. When I was laughing at stuff I kept catching this ugly glaring spectre just out of my line of sight - it wuz me!

Wouldn't have thought Airplane/Police Squad/Top Secret et al would have aged particularly badly as the comedy is daft/silly rather than timely

Face/...ON!

Face/Lift, more like.

Face/Swap

Face/Butt

there shld be a Face / Off every two years by a different director and with two different leads

or just use Statham every time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLGD8g7pTfo

I'm gonna put your face....back on your face

here's that scene without most of the jokes cut out

there shld be a Face / Off every two years by a different director and with two different leads

i would prefer this over the biennial freaky friday movie

Hello, Cruel World. New Trailer Tomorrow. pic.twitter.com/oAFK0epmbB

— Walt Disney Studios (@DisneyStudios) February 16, 2021

they’re jokerfying cruella de vil

"Let me get this straight - you think dogs are only good for fur for coats?"
"They are - and I'm tired of pretending that they're not"

The hits just keep on coming

Netflix just announced the project, featuring the coming-of-age story of one #WednesdayAddams from director Tim Burton. https://t.co/Qr5obu0nIQ

— Tor.com (@tordotcom) February 17, 2021

finally we'll know how Wednesday got her powers

lol I came here because of Cruella, glad to see I was not first. At least maybe finally we will learn how Cruella got so cruel.

wednesday is the strongest addams family member to build a story around, but tim burton, ugh

Ooh, ooh, let me see if I can guess the next announcement! Let's see...perfunctory + edgy reboot of secondary (if not tertiary), decades-old character that literally no one was asking to see again, featuring the creative input of someone with a recognizable name who really needs a new boat, from a platform in desperate need of literally any content whatsoever...

The Roku Channel announces Ferguson Explains Nothing, a dark new take on the younger brother of Clarissa and his blood pact with the Dark Lord, from visionary auteur Baz Luhrmann

Was this posted?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ezhm_9ehXU4

I just soiled myself.

I...yes, I'm still soiling myself. Goddamn it.

A SpaceX rocket exploding isn't going to have the same emotional impact as Challenger.

― Joe Biden Stan Account (milo z), Friday, February 12, 2021 2:48 PM (five days ago) bookmarkflaglink

xxp the Onion's video division keeps getting better.

i'm guessing most people who grew up with punky brewster have kids who are too old for this

I have absolutely no idea who they think that show is for.

Hey why not Webster except Webster is fifty and unemployed and going back to finish his college degree and there's a wacky tween vlogger who he befriends and also no one under thirty knows who Webster even is and no one over thirty has particularly fond memories of the third-rate '80s sitcom called Webster and even the few who might aren't exactly doing flips about seeing Webster: The Depressing Middle-Aged Years.

I just soiled myself.

I...yes, I'm still soiling myself. Goddamn it.

― The Mandolinrainian (Old Lunch), Wednesday, February 17, 2021 4:51 PM bookmarkflaglink

Butt Lunch

They could reboot Small Wonder as a Robot Out of Water story, where the robot kid from the '80s, still the same "age," is discovered in 2021. Hijinks, anachronisms and malapropisms ensue.

that Punky Brewster looks like a very, very, very, very poor man's Pamela Adlon/Better Things

EXCLU: Timothee Chalamet to play Willy Wonka in WB origin pic WONKA https://t.co/7iRDNk8Qa9

— Justin Kroll (@krolljvar) May 24, 2021

lol

omg, hatewatch time

WONKA: THE MAN AND HIS DREAM

4 hours, Zak Snyder directed

i'm not sure how i feel about such a smashable wonka

Mr. Chalamet yearns to be seen so much more than smashable; he wants to break free and see more scripts that exhibit his darker, edgier side. His next obvious move is to play The Joker.

plot twist: timothee chalamet IS the joker AS willy wonka IN: wb's rebooted dark universe reboot, little orphan bruce wayne and the chocolate factory 2: rebootier

Ok, so going from the reviews, Top Gun: Maverick might actually be good?

the first one wasn't good

The twist is it’s a sequel to Maverick, not Top Gun.

they should have called it Top Gun: Iceman to go for that marvel money