Last (x) Movies you are going to Avoid

Marie Antoinette doesn’t fit firstname + lastname formula y’all

Definitely one that sucked was Steve Jobs

Probably doesn’t need to be stated, but: Cats

I totally forgot Cats was even happening until I saw some fancy new edition of the Eliot book today. And then I remembered and I died. I died, guys. I died.

Most of the movies represented during the pre-Star Wars trailer suite looked like steamy refuse but the only one that stood out enough to really get my goat was the one that, sight unseen, I would've found the least objectionable.

Why. The fuck. Is the dog in the new Call of the Wild 100% bad CGI. What could possibly justify not using an actual dog in a live action movie about a dog. Did Harrison Ford only agree to star if they were willing to hang a green screen hung in his living room so he never had to leave his easy chair?

EXCLUSIVE: James @mang0ld to direct Timothee Chalamet in Searchlight’s #GoingElectric about Bob Dylan’s move from folk to rock musichttps://t.co/OZnkvp1dVs

— Deadline Hollywood (@DEADLINE) January 6, 2020

Lol good nominee

ugggggh Fuckkkk that!

Chalamet is a terrible actor

coming around on it purely for the fact that no on will be more annoyed at its existence than robert himself

I thought I read he was executive producing it?

jesus, missed that

some fuckwit has made a movie about the military wives choir

We needed calendar girls for gammonettes

I would watch a Short Cuts style movie about the wall of gammon lads tbh

I once sent a very offensive and treasonable comment to military wives choir on twitter in response to their xmas single when i was pissed. GCHQ probably have a file on me.

ugh, Peter Cattaneo

as well as all that other parochial garbage he also did the fucking A Word. I nearly assaulted my television with a lump hammer over that shit!

jesus what a wasteman

ffs Sharon Horgan youre better than this

She was also in that awful Game Night movie, which she was also better than.

Crazy Samurai Musashi: https://www.filmfreakcentral.net/ffc/2020/08/fantastia-fest-20-crazy-samurai-musashi.html

I love examples where certain reviews are better than the movie itself

Tenet

The Painted Bird

What if you saved a souvenir from every relationship you've ever been in? THE BROKEN HEARTS GALLERY follows the always unique Lucy (Geraldine Viswanathan), a 20-something art gallery assistant living in New York City, who also happens to be an emotional hoarder. After she gets dumped by her latest boyfriend, Lucy is inspired to create The Broken Heart Gallery, a pop-up space for the items love has left behind. Word of the gallery spreads, encouraging a movement and a fresh start for all the romantics out there, including Lucy herself.

it's the last sentence that really suggests "this will be trite and forced and awful"

Pete formerly of this parish had a lot of good things to say about it - it stars the actress who played John Cena's daughter from Blockers!

well, certainly i support her getting more work! the kids in Blockers were all really good iirc.

Avoiding it all this year as the 2nd wave comes along :-(

The Painted Bird

― A White, White Gay (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 16 September 2020 01:04 (three days ago) bookmarkflaglink

otm times a thousand

Hillbilly Elegy

o shit yes

Spencer
Belfast

Spencer's good, but in an "effective portrait of a miserable situation" way. which i would fault no one for avoiding.

Dune

i am also avoiding belfast

i liked dune. it is about as "out there" as a mainstream movie can get.

It's going to turn into a three film bore fest. Just can't face it.

The worms are definitely boring… through the sand, that is

I lasted ten minutes through King Richard.

Gonna be fantastic seeing Big Willie Style sweep the crix awards this year.

Maybe its sorry-ass box office this weekend will save us.

Ope, too late, his Oscar's already been engraved.

letterboxd thread just reminded me of "C'mon C'mon," starring Joaquin Phoenix as a Nice Black-and-White Dad.

mike mills is such a good director tho. and he's an uncle!

Yeah, after 20th Century Women I'll give this one a shot.

West Side Story. The original's okay, and I would sometimes play the opening clip for students on Jerome Robbins' birthday (primarily because the concept of a choreographer would be new to them). Nothing drawing me to a remake.

Awards Season 2021 edition: House of Gucci; King Richard; tick, tick…BOOM!

I hope not to see a worse movie in the next two-ish months than tick tick BOOM!

HoGucc was a delightful, silly diversion in the theatre but would mostly slide off the eyes and brain at home

(hadn't seen a Scott in literally 30 years till The Last Duel, came out amped that I only had to wait a month for another three-hour historical Ridley epic starring Adam Driver)