“Well fgti you can take it up the ass up to 17 times within a 24 hour stretch *cough* without any long-term concerns” thanks Coach
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Saturday, 23 November 2019 01:14 (four years ago) link
ive never been big on penetration
(go ahead, I can take your punchlines)
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 23 November 2019 01:21 (four years ago) link
i think jacking off with someone is surprisingly intimate because you get to see someone do this thing that they spend so much time doing alone. so not stupid.
― cheese canopy (map), Friday, November 22, 2019
I like this post a lot
― Dan S, Sunday, 24 November 2019 02:54 (four years ago) link
so i've gotten into this new thing, and bear with me bc it's kind of embarrassing. i've become one of those people who gets into like a jo buddy situation. you know like i don't even need to do anything else. is that so stupid?
― surm, Friday, November 22, 2019 1:08 PM
also like this post
― Dan S, Sunday, 24 November 2019 03:04 (four years ago) link
hafta say my technique changes substantially when there's someone there
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Sunday, 24 November 2019 05:35 (four years ago) link
Few things are more enervating than a gay bar at which the patrons linger in the hopes of not having to hit on anyone as terrible music blasts
― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Sunday, 24 November 2019 13:28 (four years ago) link
as they stare into their phones
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Sunday, 24 November 2019 13:41 (four years ago) link
hi y'all
― clouds, Sunday, 24 November 2019 16:01 (four years ago) link
YO
― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Sunday, 24 November 2019 16:23 (four years ago) link
hi alfred :D
― clouds, Sunday, 24 November 2019 16:41 (four years ago) link
cloudzy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
― surm, Monday, 25 November 2019 18:43 (four years ago) link
i'm in that awkward phase where i've changed my grindr picture and i'm wondering how ppl will react i gotta show a little leg in it though, i find those are more successful than pure face
― surm, Tuesday, 26 November 2019 17:14 (four years ago) link
I've become one of those people whose Grindr photo is now something like 3 years old.
― temporarily embarrassed thousandaire (Eric H.), Tuesday, 26 November 2019 18:37 (four years ago) link
omg so was mine!
― surm, Tuesday, 26 November 2019 18:39 (four years ago) link
i kind of look like Jesus in the new one but i think i'm ok with it
― surm, Tuesday, 26 November 2019 18:44 (four years ago) link
My Grindr photo is me staring at the camera with concern and my finger is in my nose. Very popular choice, I think it makes it clear that I'm "into nasal"
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Tuesday, 26 November 2019 19:39 (four years ago) link
LOL
― surm, Tuesday, 26 November 2019 19:51 (four years ago) link
I was very high last night and said “I’m a bank teller and every day your dick comes into my branch and deposits $2k”
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Thursday, 28 November 2019 15:28 (four years ago) link
LolOne time when i was younger and I dressed in my aunt's clothesI creeped AOL and pretended I was a bank teller named VeronicaAnd entered a relationship with a 32-year old man who lived in ArizonaIt was a formative time
― surm, Tuesday, 3 December 2019 20:21 (four years ago) link
That scans like a David Berman lyric
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Tuesday, 3 December 2019 20:24 (four years ago) link
Arizona left me for a man who came from TampaHe left behind his rescue and a box of cherry sodaThe puppy was three-legged and he pissed all on the sofaThe soda cleaned the urine and left a sickly aromaIt was a formative time
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Tuesday, 3 December 2019 20:28 (four years ago) link
Veronica retired and I became a girl named BettyBetty was a brunette and she hooked out on the jettyThe sailors laid good pipe but they'd only tip a twentyI saved up, bought a Dell and I started boarding heavyIt was a formative time
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Tuesday, 3 December 2019 20:33 (four years ago) link
those are rly good
― J0rdan S., Wednesday, 4 December 2019 04:43 (four years ago) link
Ah this isn't gay or anything, maybe it is? It isn't. Last week I was in my group chat and the dude who writes the lyrics for the band Fucked Up said he was sitting at Whole Foods feeling uninspired in his writing and I offered the following.
People think they're getting their foods... WHOLEOrganic produce won't give you a... SOULQuit your job, tell your boss to eat your... POLEThis is a tasty cinnamon... ROLL
When I'm shopping at Whole... FOODSThis yuppie scum can get awful... RUDEThey try to X me out with their atti... TUDEThe muffins, gotta say, they are pretty... GOOD
The salad buffet is the fuckin'... JAMBut I'm not gonna give my money to the... MANDinosaur kale and purple... YAMSI hide 'em in my pants, my crucial... SCAM
Uh oh, here come the organic... PIGSThey saw me lifting cheese and imported... FIGSI hit the ground running, when they zag, I... ZIGScored a fancy rider, on to the... GIG
Now I'm chowing down at the hardcore... SHOWFancy fucking lettuce and peas of... SNOWDip 'em in the hummus, that's how I... GOBen n Jerry's in the pit, flavour: cookie... DOUGH
Now Fucked Up dude and I have decided to write a kid's album called "Scams From The Grocery Store", like a beginner's guide to petty theft. Song titles include: "Free Food", "Every Day's Your Birthday", and "Toys R Yrs"
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Wednesday, 4 December 2019 16:32 (four years ago) link
What If... Young Money invented rap?
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Wednesday, 4 December 2019 16:35 (four years ago) link
Dinosaur kale and purple... YAMSI hide 'em in my pants, my crucial... SCAM
This is my favorite part.
― temporarily embarrassed thousandaire (Eric H.), Wednesday, 4 December 2019 16:48 (four years ago) link
Lol I wondered where that format subliminally came from
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Wednesday, 4 December 2019 18:53 (four years ago) link
i just watched Bodied and the raps were better there
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 4 December 2019 18:59 (four years ago) link
so like, i had a threesome with this guy the other week and he was gorgeous and then i had another threesome with him but like, i definitely couldn't perform bc i had the drogas in my system and i had already hooked up with someone else that nightand it was ... SO EMBARRASSINGand now i think HE BLOCKED ME ON GRINDR i'm mortified. MORTIFIED. anything you can say to help me feel better would be great. i mean... this was a level of depression so bad that i literally missed my flight back home for Thanksgiving and instead slept in my bed for two days. and now i haven't had sex in a week and i'm going to pull my hair out.
― surm, Wednesday, 4 December 2019 22:11 (four years ago) link
Oh surm Being blocked on Grindr is NO THING, happens to everybody. When I was in my post-breakup sex spiral, I had this totally hot couple hitting me up for a third, and they were abt to give me their address, and I was stepping into the shower, and then they asked me for a body pic and I sent them one, got out of the shower and... BLOCKED.
It’s not a judgement on your sexiness it’s just an effective way of expressing no-interest. Just think of all the people you see on the app where it’s a “no” and feel the same camaraderie and respect for those people— just no desire.
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Wednesday, 4 December 2019 22:49 (four years ago) link
Right, right. Ugh. The first time we threed he asked me to hold him after. Whatevs. I'm not going to let it break me. Ffs.
― surm, Wednesday, 4 December 2019 23:50 (four years ago) link
Just remember the good one! That sounds really nice!
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Thursday, 5 December 2019 02:31 (four years ago) link
love your posts surm and fgti
― Dan S, Thursday, 5 December 2019 02:39 (four years ago) link
I read about grindr like I do about new Tarantino films
things I will never experience
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 5 December 2019 03:14 (four years ago) link
How do you pull, Morbs?
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Thursday, 5 December 2019 04:35 (four years ago) link
Oh by the way, noted homosexual documentarian Matt Wolf has just announced his forthcoming masterpiece today, which I proudly did the score for, I'm so fucking excited this movie is amazing
https://www.instagram.com/p/B5qjTJTljSk/
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Thursday, 5 December 2019 04:37 (four years ago) link
i saw recorder! amazing and profound film
― J0rdan S., Thursday, 5 December 2019 05:04 (four years ago) link
Right? he's the best
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Thursday, 5 December 2019 15:24 (four years ago) link
<3 Dan
i saw 4 boys this weekend i feel like i accomplished something
― surm, Monday, 9 December 2019 22:38 (four years ago) link
I have to tell u that I just got irrationally angry with a bad kisserLike he kept pointing his little tongue in my mouth. I wanted to slap him sillyAnd his breath was not goodI had to pretend I couldn't keep it up just to get him out of my apartment.
― surm, Wednesday, 11 December 2019 04:22 (four years ago) link
what's on deck for the weekend everyone
― surm, Thursday, 12 December 2019 21:58 (four years ago) link
a glogg party
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 12 December 2019 22:16 (four years ago) link
is glogg eggnog?
― surm, Thursday, 12 December 2019 22:21 (four years ago) link
nope
mulled wine
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 12 December 2019 22:21 (four years ago) link
YUM
― surm, Thursday, 12 December 2019 22:22 (four years ago) link
w/ extra ingredients
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 12 December 2019 22:27 (four years ago) link
omg like what? acid?
― surm, Thursday, 12 December 2019 22:36 (four years ago) link
HI!
― surm, Monday, 16 December 2019 16:38 (four years ago) link
probably not this batch, surm. jim beam.
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Monday, 16 December 2019 17:37 (four years ago) link
ok i love both soi loved those ads with Mila Kunislike, i really started buying Jim Beam after thatso they worked!!!https://www.ispot.tv/ad/7Bsg/jim-beam-make-history-featuring-mila-kunis
― surm, Monday, 16 December 2019 17:59 (four years ago) link