Worst TV adverts of the moment

Mark, I don't think smugness is ever something justified on an issue as big as this.

You could argue that any good work they may be doing with their green initiatives is undone by the impression they are giving in this advert that climate-change-related planet-saving* is something so trivial that it can be singlehandedly achieved by one ice-cream manufacturer.

*really human-saving

Definite lowlights are the poorly dubbed euro-ad which opens with "it's bad enough when your house smells of fish" - come again?

Ha ha, yes. I always say, in my head, "But it doesn't" when that come on. Also the advert that uses the word "fragrancing".

not a word^

I don't know what they're so smug about, I'm not eating any more of their chocolate than I did before. But then, altho I've seen the ad lots of time, I didn't even know it was for Cadburys!

To the extent to which I understand it - which is not much - there are ads that are designed to make you want to rush out immediately and buy the product, and those which are designed to embed the brand in your subconscious, such that when you next go out to buy a chocolate bar for example, you get a dairy milk.

I know it's a lot more complicated than that but the gorilla one is definitely in the latter category.

cadbury perhaps taking a leaf out of orange's book...? I know kate moross did some of their print ads

the monkey one is OK; it does almost have the feel of a viral, despite being shot for TV

Oh man, I've just remembered, there's an advert for a digital camera (I assume) with a couple in Italy or France or somewhere, at one point they're on a boat with a buncha nuns and then having a meal later on, and the guy has the most fucking irritating smug gurning fucking kickable slappable face

oh no, Greggs bakery advert with the bloke from max and paddy. heavens.

speak american

pls

yeh dat one's a bladdy noightmare gav

"Throw-On"

Corr bloimey that Miller Loite advert with the old boike is a roight royal pain in the Marble Arch it's a roight two an eight Queen Mum Gawd bless 'er only ever killed her own &c.

I'm not sure if it's on TV, but the cinema ads for Australia ending with that warmer shouting "So where the bloody hell are you?" have started appearing in print too, I note with horror.

Definitely some homoerotic shiznit going on in the Subway advert at the moment.

injurylawers4u ad with eastenders' johnny allen

oh yes! that one is excellent. "you could sit around and shrug your shoulders like a poofter, but if you're a real man you'll let us rinse the fuck out of those bastards for every penny they have"... or something to that effect.

> speak american

there's an american equivalent of this thread somewhere

oh - most annoying commercial now running

(actually there's a newer one than that, must be. can't find it though)

there's a tube advert for some aussie 'long' hair product that actually makes me want homicide legalised

wow

Any of the "howard" halifax adverts. That new one with the beach boys song is the worst yet.

those carling ads

oh my fucking god, i just saw the halifax beach boys ad. That's pretty bad even by halifax howard ads standards.

Moonpig... Moonpig... MOONPIG... MOONPIG DOT COM

New slim fast advert, extended song.

pure fucking evil

The one with Suggs where it's blatantly inferred that he's tapping the underage daughter.

That new Halifax advert truly is the worst yet. I really really hate Howard even more and he's barely in it. Boycott the Halifax!!

New slim fast advert, extended song.

pure fucking evil

Agreed - it makes me want to kill people whenever I see it. I thought "I'm snacking on PRETZELS!!11!!" was bad enough but this.... arghrghgrhgrhrghrhhhhh I blame the Americans. Every single one of those terms used is from the US of Uncle Stateside.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfDsl0qaNSk

Internets

confused.com ads are the worst. "hey you know what would look cool on TV? CLIP ART"

the wistful american idol ads

Carol Vorderman on Farmfoods. Does she really need the money?

it's not a detergent, it's a SAFE-TERGENT!!!!!!!!!

injurylawers4u ad with eastenders' johnny allen

I've just seen one of these. "You might think that suing others is selfish, but there's this little thing called karma. The universe needs a karmic balance and if you don't make them pay then the universe will implode and it will be your fault. Who's selfish now, eh?"

I don't understand why you'd want your company represented by a former bent copper/gangster.

john hannah's smug caledonian face on those virgin atlantic ads

honourable mention to pc world

Perennial classic. Always love the bullshit random specs the "employees" are casually discussing.

I dunno if it's 'worst', strictly, but bloody hell that Western Australia ad is a wee bit up itself. "Come and see the REAL Australia - It's four hours nearer than Sydney!"

80 GIGABYTE HARD DISK???????????????????

WTF is 2 Gig of "Memory"?

"We need Dual-Core and a 17" monitor!"

i liked the one with the smiling silent Tech Guy who pops round to install your pc and presumably also to copy your keys and come back while you sleep and slit your throat

Has Karl Howman finally lost the Flash contract? RIP Big Fella

Not annoying or anything, more just an abject (and presumably expensive) failure: the Virgin Broadband campaign with Uma Thurman. The original ones a year or so ago lit her in the most unflattering way, made her look really haggard, and gave her a terrible script that was cringemakingly charmless in its attempt to be what ... sultry? Intimate?

Now they've gone one step further with their "high-speed" push by putting her in a sodding wind tunnel so that her skin is pulled off her face faster than gravity can manage. It's horrible. Hiring a Hollywood pin-up to lend glamour to your product then systematically defiling her looks - not smart.

Looking at them again on YouTube, I think I overstressed her looks in what makes them so bad. And I don't think it's intimacy or sultriness they're trying for. It's more just beating you over the head with what a big star they've landed, hoping that if they get her to say "I'm Uma Thurman, the sexy film star" as blatantly as possible, over and over again, we'll be impressed. Lady, if you have to tell us.

oh hey the norton finance hurdle advert is back, a new era dawns

The homoerotic Walker's Crisps one with Gary Lineker and the Arctic Monkeys.

Looking at them again on YouTube, I think I overstressed her looks in what makes them so bad. And I don't think it's intimacy or sultriness they're trying for. It's more just beating you over the head with what a big star they've landed, hoping that if they get her to say "I'm Uma Thurman, the sexy film star" as blatantly as possible, over and over again, we'll be impressed. Lady, if you have to tell us.

-- Alba, Sunday, 3 February 2008 17:31 (1 month ago) Bookmark Link

Funnily enough, some interviewer asked her if she had Virgin Broadband, she said no as she hasn't got a home in the UK, and they don't serve the US. So, yeah.

Didn't they replace her with Ruby Wax for a while? Or was that a nightmareish vision I had??