Joe Biden, Senator from Citibank (oops, DELAWARE), to Run for President

yup

it's weird how his GOP buddies in the Senate are clamoring to completely and extra-legally fuck him and yet he still thinks "oh sure, they'll come around"

Folks,

one thing that's particularly amazing about the video of the bite is just how much finger he actually managed to get into his mouth in that split second pic.twitter.com/geSwNt7CnX

— Ashley Feinberg (@ashleyfeinberg) December 1, 2019

Wtf
Who would do that

That’s impressive

Truly an apex predator

The Democratic Party is doomed because it’s run by people who think Rodney Dangerfield is the villain of Caddyshack. https://t.co/0lYo8Sc4pt

— Morton Downey III (@cushbomb) December 5, 2019

this is not an ad that would change a single trump voter's mind

as has been covered at great length elsewhere i see

im beginning to think this biden fella is a real piece of shit!

don't really see him that way

and he may end up being our candidate

Rodney Dangerfield is the villain of everything he's in!

you’d be a villain too if no one gave YOU any respect!

rodney dangerfield IS the joker

*joe places both hands on your shoulders, looks you right in the eye*

'son, you can't do good things even if you want to, and if you think you can, please don't vote for me'

Here's a thought, @JoeBiden. Maybe your climate policy advisor shouldn't be somebody who has taken a million dollars from the fossil fuel industry 🤔

Otherwise your commitment to averting the climate crisis sounds like a bunch of...well, malarkey. pic.twitter.com/JnfRvOer45

— Sunrise Movement 🌅 (@sunrisemvmt) December 5, 2019

"our candidate"

I have no candidate but Sanders

it's wild, Joe really does act like every single part of running for office and trying to persuade people to vote for you is a gigantic pain in his ass.

guy cannot sell his stance on this. obviously you can ban fracking nationwide, right now. you dn't need to transition away from that. it would be much harder to do that with oil. so biden torpedos the argument by inflating it to include obviously problematic things and stating 'you can't do any of it'. uh, alright.

yea the fact that he's still polling well is nuts to me, I do not get the sense whatsoever that this man actually wants to be President and his whole appeal seems to be rooted in "well, Republicans like him so maybe we can go back to a more civil time" which is just....lmao dude

do any current republicans even like him though?

he and mitch mcconnell are TIGHT

Yeah, Joe would be calling Mitch from the Oval Office about Mitch torpedoing every single bill that came from the House, and Mitch would always be telling him, "Gee, Joe, you know I hate to do this to you, but I have to. That's politics for you." And Joe would always be answering, " That's OK, Mitch. I understand. Do what you gotta. So, how's the wife?"

hey Mitch, some enviros are on my back because I don't care about getting rid of fracking because i'm going to be dead soon anyway. can you just shut the door on that whole deal so i can say i tried?

Gee, Joe, you know I hate to do this to you, but I have to. That's politics for you.

thanks Mitch. i tried to put both of my hands on their shoulders as i told them no, but it didn't work. i love you

how many times in the last month has biden publicly told someone to vote for another candidate

*puts hands on both of your shoulders*

look at my record

this is kind of weird but i thought of a good VR idea - find a POV picture of joe biden holding both of your shoulders and looking into your eyes while lying. that's the VR experience, but when you agree with what he says, the background slowly morphs into a ballroom. the more you agree with him, the more you find yourself slowly waltzing around a ballroom in 1972

everything is fine, and a one, two, three, everything's fine, and-a two, two, three, look at my ♩ ♪ recoooooord ♫ and-a three, two, three, ♫ loooooook into these biden eyeeeees ♫, last time-a four, two, three..

my eyes tunred "Poser (Karl" into "President Keyes" and i was like this is weird, these are really good Karl Malone posts

FALSE: there are only 3 good karl malone posts, and they all happened before 2013

hey he John Kerry's endorsement today!

I can't decide what that says about Warren. Or Kerry.

how many times in the last month has biden publicly told someone to vote for another candidate

― gbx, Friday, December 6, 2019 11:43 AM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

Joe Biden otm

hey he John Kerry's endorsement today!

I can't decide what that says about Warren. Or Kerry.

― Joe Gargan (dandydonweiner), Friday, December 6, 2019 12:41 PM (nine minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

Bros before Massholes.

Biden’s strategy of telling people to fuck off seems like something that would have been a bigger deal before Trump

Examining the full exchange and especially what the old Iowa guy said, Biden's urge to slap the guy silly must have been overwhelming.

brave

https://66.media.tumblr.com/6a45e12b3174e8cdad7fdfaf26699138/ccb16e60a6642cfe-a7/s1280x1920/3175f8f9325b4768e5bf9ccba0404cc40f78b820.jpg

This guy isn't dead yet?

shh!

how would we tell?

Joe Biden, five years before invasion, said the Senate needed to “come to our milk” and make a decision on war with Iraq, and the only way of disarming the country is "taking Saddam down" https://t.co/LZBjtyHinr

— Ryan Grim (@ryangrim) January 7, 2020

"come to our milk"?

it's a leg-hair thing, you don't want to know

Here’s Joe Biden on the Senate Floor bragging about all the times he’s tried to cut Social Security. pic.twitter.com/t0RNDFFN9L

— Every Billionaire Is A Policy Failure (@DanRiffle) January 15, 2020

icymi

https://www.marijuanamoment.net/joe-biden-again-says-no-to-marijuana-legalization-without-more-studies/

uncanny

Biden-voice iPhone hack: type “Ok Mack” and then let the middle predictive text button do the rest pic.twitter.com/NGQnLWYq3k

— Colm Quinn (@colmfquinn) January 23, 2020

I just want a darraghmac voice hack. LADS

booga booga

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/biden-iran-mailer-fearmongering_n_5e273faac5b673621f7cfa3f

lol he can't even wait for the general election to roll this shit out

genuinely unsettling

Joe Biden's Instagram Stories are next level stuff. pic.twitter.com/JGbOYS4USp

— Florian 🥁 🕶️ (@BetaODork) January 25, 2020

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EPKs4K0UUAA2P_p?format=jpg&name=900x900

BREAKING: 30 @CCIAction and @IAStudentAction members are refusing to leave @JoeBiden’s statewide headquarters in Des Moines over his lies about #MedicareForAll and his ties to the insurance company CEOs who are funding his campaign. pic.twitter.com/95qJWFv3x6

— Iowa Citizens for Community Improvement Action (@CCIAction) January 27, 2020

yeah I think that's the same incident referred to by a Biden surrogate as "Sanders sending gypsies"