things you once thought socially acceptable which now horrify you to remember

I've heard that said about Cheers by someone else and idrgi, although I don't really know the later seasons. What makes the Sam/Diane relationship closer to harassment than the relationships on Parks and Recreation or the The Office (US)?

If by "society" one means one's high school classmates, then we'll see a lot more regrettable and immature behavior tagged as 'used to be socially acceptable' than if we broaden that scope a bit.

The OP does ask what we "thought to be socially acceptable" as opposed to what "used to be objectively socially acceptable". A teenager could definitely think of social acceptability in terms of what is accepted by their peers.

(Still bold enough to give an actual answer, although a lot of mine have been posted.)

WRT Cheers

Sam and Diane less so but Sam and Rebecca is hard to watch, Sam seems to be building a textbook hostile work environment plus Rebecca cops a lot from her rotating bosses.

Oh, I didn't watch those seasons as much.

Yeah those seasons are lame

the dynamic changes a lot from season to season in the Rebecca era, but Sam is her subordinate for the first few years (and Carla & the patrons probably do more to make the environment hostile to her). Sam’s maturing character also changes to mainly be performing “the stud” in public, and a caring & supportive friend to Rebecca behind closed doors. In latter years it’s a recurring trope that he’s fundamentally forgotten to be a slut, being reminded of the existence of his little black book & so forth.

nb tbc there definitely is loads of sexual harassment perpetuated in Cheers! the Melville / Carla affair is totes probbo too. but it’s often balanced out, or clearly indicated to be inappropriate

iirc there's a pretty uncomfortable scene late in season 1 in the back room, where diane ~jokingly~ defends herself with a billiard ball

it was very good for 1982-83, but nevertheless

Watching hours and hours of sitcoms with the family, or comedy panel shows, repeats of Simpsons etc

i never really enjoyed the rebecca era of cheers, even tho kirstie alley is a terrifically funny actress, and i think it's partly bcz the nature of her comedy delusion was more demeaning than diane's comedy delusion was

diane is very evidently smarter intellectually than anyone else in the bar pre-frasier and it's not deluded for her to think she's "better" than this job (tho not in fact "better" than the bar's ethos?): but the ways she thinks she's better are often quite vain and silly ("it's not a rejection letter! it's a soon-and-inevitably-to-be-published letter!") -- comedy abt the many different ways we're smart and dumb is comedy i enjoy.

the rebecca era was much more a glass-ceiling comedy which involved her humiliating herself with powerful ppl who were also loathsome? which i think shifted a lot of the balance that the earlier material generally had. it was never "obvious" that she was actually a super-capable good-at-business boss who by rights ought to be rising high much quicker than she was, plus it also quietly played to a lot of stuff abt "actually women just sleep their way to the top", and then had to ground this in the insistence that e.g. robin colcord was sexy when he wasn't

caveat: i haven't watched a full ep for years, my favourite bit was always when woody vaulted the bar

"weird woman in a bar (La Lechera) at 10:43 12 Jul 19
12. The smoking lounges at the teen dance clubs <—- plural! that I went to as a preteen and teen"

Woah this! I remember going to underage gigs and there were smoking areas. I also remember the police assigned to those events smoking, which police certainly do not do in uniform in Australia any more.

I wonder how long it’ll take before air-travel falls into this category. I remember some guardian article years ago which predicted that inessential far-flung air-travel would eventually become as socially unacceptable as big game hunting.

It hasn’t happened yet, but I feel there’s some movement towards this view.

do frequent flyers still do carbon offsetting? this always seemed quite a lot of delusional nonsense to me. I think the first time I heard the term was from Tony Blair, so that probably adds a lot to my lifelong cynicism towards it.

"The Talons of Weng-Chiang".

I wonder how long it’ll take before air-travel falls into this category. I remember some guardian article years ago which predicted that inessential far-flung air-travel would eventually become as socially unacceptable as big game hunting.

It hasn’t happened yet, but I feel there’s some movement towards this view.

"What makes the Sam/Diane relationship closer to harassment than the relationships on Parks and Recreation or the The Office (US)?"

Aziz Ansari's latest special calls this out explicitly, saying that if the Office were made now at the end you'd find the documentary being made was all evidence against Jim sexually harassing a married woman. He also said there was a story in Parks where he gave Rashida Jones' character a teddy bear with a camera in it; he said if he got that script now he'd be like, "uhhhhhhhh"

when my wife and kid rewatched Friends last year they were pretty shocked at how much 'lol gay' stuff was in it.

> "The Talons of Weng-Chiang".

the black and white minstrel show. primetime saturday night tv for 20 years (until '78).

(london live tv sometimes shows a cliff richard film with him doing a number in blackface)

Trying to think of something that's not racist, homophobic or involves smoking.

• I couldn't imagine letting my nine-year-old go out into a cul-de-sac and shoot off fireworks on his own.

• When my dad would pick me and my sister up for the weekend and drive us the 60 miles back down to Capitol CIty where he lived, he'd keep a small cooler behind his seat with a six-pack of Busch. I don't know how "socially acceptable" that was, even in 1984, but it didn't even make me go "now wait a minute..." until I was older.

• People not automatically buckling up after getting into the car. "But what if I go off a bridge upside down? I'm not Houdini!" WHAT IF YOU HIT A CAR OR A TREE AND GO FLYING OUT THE WINDSH–

there's a plot point in Revenge of the Nerds which in retrospect feels absolutely insane

saying "chicks"

i met a French guy this weekend who kept referring casually to his "meuf" and i was like 💀💀

In summers during college, '96-'00, I worked for a county highway department. For some projects we would contract out to local construction companies and I remember one foreman that would keep his six-pack of Busch cooling in the water cooler strapped to the back of his pick-up and pulling it out at the end of the day "for the drive home". I remember being shocked, but nobody around batted an eye.

People not automatically buckling up after getting into the car. "But what if I go off a bridge upside down? I'm not Houdini!" WHAT IF YOU HIT A CAR OR A TREE AND GO FLYING OUT THE WINDSH–

See also: everyone riding bikes/scooters without a helmet. Most people ride bicycles wearing some sort of crash protection nowadays ffs. Seems to be part of this macho crap where you're supposed to be "hard" enough to survive plunging headfirst through the windscreen at 70mph or coming off your bike at the same kind of speed.

i met a French guy this weekend who kept referring casually to his "meuf" and i was like 💀💀

Really? It's no big deal. Women also casually call each other 'meuf'.

Watching hours and hours of sitcoms with the family, or comedy panel shows, repeats of Simpsons etc

― Robert Adam Gilmour, Saturday, July 13, 2019 12:11 PM (two days ago)

is this not socially acceptable anymore? i mean, prob not wise to spend your days doing this as an adult, of course

I haven't seen Revenge of the Nerds but I'm guessing you're talking about a scene where someone pretends to be someone else to rape a woman.

I watched about an hour of this fuck awful Richard Curtis pile of shit a few days ago called The Boat That Rocked (aka Pirate Radio) that uses the same "plot" as that, it came out in 2009.

xps

• People not automatically buckling up after getting into the car. "But what if I go off a bridge upside down? I'm not Houdini!" WHAT IF YOU HIT A CAR OR A TREE AND GO FLYING OUT THE WINDSH–

My dad didn't buckle up for a year because he was protesting the idea that insurance copies were influencing cops to write tickets for something that should be a "personal choice"

He stopped, thankfully. I half expected to find him in a wrecked, burned out car, dying, yet moaning "haha, take that, guys"

pom i know women say it and i got no problem w that. a bit like if a woman said "I'm going out with my bitches later". but something about the way this guy so casually dropped it.. i dunno i found it extremely unpleasant! maybe a bad example for this thread tho.

by the way he worked in finance

It's nowhere near as aggressive as 'my bitches', even in a friendly context. It's pretty neutral, just very familier and maybe slightly young-ish, much like mec. I had a conversation about this with my (French) wife earlier because I wanted to make sure I wasn't talking out of my ass and she very much agreed.

That said, there's definitely a sexist, possessive way of saying it, so I doubt you were imagining things. I just don't think it's embedded into the word per se.

Besides, France is notoriously conservative when it comes to linguistic norms, although some headway has been made in recent years (see: 'auteure/autrice').

Words like the following are still deemed fine by most French people, though, which speaks volumes:

https://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tête-de-nègre_(pâtisserie)

there's a plot point in Revenge of the Nerds which in retrospect feels absolutely insane

feel like it used to be more common to see kids being hauled around town or down the highway in pickup truck beds. i was one of those kids a few times no doubt. occasionally i'll see someone with their dog back there and it pisses me off.

Watching hours and hours of sitcoms with the family, or comedy panel shows, repeats of Simpsons etc
― Robert Adam Gilmour, Saturday, July 13, 2019 12:11 PM (two days ago)

is this not socially acceptable anymore? i mean, prob not wise to spend your days doing this as an adult, of course
― (The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Monday, July 15, 2019 5:22 PM

I'm horrified by it but I don't know how younger generations feel about it. Plenty of the older generations still watch tv in the majority of their free time and I wonder what they'd be doing otherwise, would they be a nuisance otherwise or would they flourish?

It's not that internet and videogame addiction cant be awful but I feel sorry for generations of people who have such a low quality addiction as television that they've spent much of their decades on. ((( I like "I don't even own a TV" people better than most people)))

Part of the problem was that I and many others felt we should spend more time with family but I think doing it watching television doesn't really work. You just end up watching shit mostly and not really getting much from their company. Whenever I ask people why they watched some trash, it's always a friends/family thing and I've done plenty of that myself. I completely regret it. More I think about this subject, the more hideous it is.

===

Yesterday I was at the supermarket and there was a woman wearing very buttock revealing shorts. As soon as she left, two women working at their cash tills loudly agreed "it's her own fault if she gets raped" while serving customers.

I was surprised they thought that was socially acceptable when surrounded by customers.

the term 'lads'

don't get your lad out itt

are punch and judy shows still a thing?

We saw one a while back in Whitstable.

Tête-de-nègre

:O

things US ILX seemed to think were socially acceptable 2 years ago: those fucking boorish loudmouthed chapo dickheads throwing about the r word about with abandon. ho ho ho very out there etc.. edgy!..with vile disablist speak like that coming from nominally "lefty" fat bearded loudmouthed twats.. I say enjoy your neo-lib hellscape forever lads.

That gets to my inability to understand the usefulness of this thread. It is a continuum, full of all kinds of behavior that I happily participated in or acquiesced to, and now I’m at a point where it’s all terrible and WTF.

I expect this to continue until I enter my dotage and wither into a hopeless socially conservative basket case who hates everyone. A more interesting discussion might be “behaviors you thought would never become socially acceptable and then they did”

guys fucking each other

smoking weed

that's all I got

I used to go into Windsor Town centre on my own, we lived in a block of flats that were attached via ramp (still are, I believe).

This would be around 1968,so I'd be seven. Sometimes I'd go in with my sister who was three years younger, but I was always told to look after her, and I would, like the responsible young person I was.

I practically brought up my younger brother at the of 14 whilst my mum was going through a divorce and a nervous breakdown. But my fave example of 70's parenting was when I'd get passed to a neighbour to babysit me and they'd decide to go out on the piss as well. But at least I got to watch The Medusa Touch on a colour television!

We saw one a while back in Whitstable.

― gyac, Monday, July 15, 2019 1:57 PM (one hour ago)

i mean I'm not necessarily horrified by them but it's a funny childhood memory. i think i found it slightly unnerving as a little kid, but i definitely liked it also, to some extent. mr punch slapping the shit out of the copper with his stick.

i remember my mum telling me that my grandparents went on multiple holidays and had her at 12 years old and a year or two older look after her three younger brothers, the youngest being around 4 the first time it happened

I practically brought up my younger brother at the of 14 whilst my mum was going through a divorce and a nervous breakdown. But my fave example of 70's parenting was when I'd get passed to a neighbour to babysit me and they'd decide to go out on the piss as well. But at least I got to watch The Medusa Touch on a colour television!

― calzino, Monday, 15 July 2019 21:41 (forty-three minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

same but there were three of em, one was older, it was the nineties, + alcoholism

but tbf im not sure it was socially acceptable

anyway yeah idg thread are we as a we not prone enough to eughing ourselves and each other for forgiveable human lapses in present day without doing that endearing competitive mea culpaing about past transgressions not only out of context but also when we were young which is iirc itself forgiven everything and anyway there'll always be one along in a minute to tell you that you still fall well short why arm the succubus further anyway you're all ok by me i think is what the point may have been

exactly my point

yep but wordier which cmon

i'm into "y'inz"