The car's on fire and there's no driver at the wheel - The Tory leadership elections

teabag pressing tho....

Hold on, isn’t this entirely spontaneous and non planned photograph Stasi interference into people’s private lives? https://t.co/LrVMffuQ7r

— Owen Jones🌹 (@OwenJones84) June 24, 2019

*scrutinises pixels*

I’m told by the Boris Johnson campaign that the picture is genuinely from Sunday.

Here - just to pass the time - is what Johnson’s hair looked like on Saturday so everyone can compare and contrast

Still hoping copyright of Sunday photo released.... pic.twitter.com/4aimcLHuHG

— Sam Coates Sky (@SamCoatesSky) June 24, 2019

maybe 'scrutonises' would be more apt tbh

Hope he can grow the economy as quick

— Steptoe (@Steptoesyard) June 24, 2019

I've been sitting on this straight fire hot take for awhile now but.. is Boris' vaunted "charisma" just a wee bit OVERSTATED

Yeah but consider the kind of people that vaunt it

he's over

he's mr lover lover

https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/8b646e28e6cecead9b049cca6a3e19325852d940/0_166_2871_1724/master/2871.jpg

There are no charismatic Tories.

https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/8b646e28e6cecead9b049cca6a3e19325852d940/0_166_2871_1724/master/2871.jpg?width=700&quality=85&auto=format&fit=max&s=165ca59e61bf6c0ed02f3c208b0728d8

(xp) In the kingdom of the blind...

Everyone died because of Tory cuts

What do you do to switch off? Boris: “I like to paint. I make things. I make models. I make models of buses. I don’t mean buses, I get old wooden crates and I paint them. And I paint the passengers enjoying themselves, on the low carbon bus. You really want to know this?”
WTF?

— Tom Newton Dunn (@tnewtondunn) June 25, 2019

what could possibly go wrong

Tonight I was meant to be debating Boris Johnson on Sky, answering questions about our plans for Britain. Sadly, Boris has pulled out – which I don't believe is fair on you, the public. So from 8pm I will be answering as many of your questions as poss - tweet me using #BoJoNoShow

— Jeremy Hunt (@Jeremy_Hunt) June 25, 2019

he wins the snappy hash tag competition anyway

#BoJoHoShow

#blowjobs4votes

You only have to look at the front pages of the Telegraph, Mail, Sun, etc, to know there is a coordinated effort by the rich and influential to make Johnson PM.

Mail seems to not like him much. Although will presumably swing behind him for the sake of The Nation's Unity once he's in No.10.

this "tories can always always pull off unity at a pinch" is one of the things i'm no longer that sure of -- at some point the press oligarchs aren't all going to be all on the same side, we already live in a media world shaped by their unfettered crank whims, and the lower reaches of the party are swirling around like deranged clots of minions

boris extends a challenge to cunt: 'will you join me in signing a suicide pact'

If I become PM, we will leave the EU on 31st October, deal or no deal. Today I have asked @Jeremy_Hunt whether he will also commit to this date, no matter what. We must keep our promises to the British people and deliver Brexit - no ifs, no buts, and no second referendum. pic.twitter.com/YgRSfESSFY

— Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson) June 25, 2019

"i'm not locked into this leadership contest with *you*"

border poll now

I've got Welsh blood, Irish blood and spent two happy years of my childhood in Scotland. I will NEVER allow our union to be broken up. #BoJoNoShow https://t.co/iuodJJkoB8

— Jeremy Hunt (@Jeremy_Hunt) June 25, 2019

'Blood is thicker than water' refers to the Irish Sea iirc.

Johnson and Cunt to discuss their positions on the Irish border today, might wanna brace ourselves for that one

last one to declare war on ireland is a rotten egg

Take a drink whenever they mention a technological solution. Fully automated luxury border controls.

The *funny* thing is that all that nonsense had already been thoroughly debunked/dismissed and yet here we are again!

no but you see it'll all be different if the eu are facing boris' irrepressible british pluck or jeremy cunt's hollowed-out death stare across the negotiating table, they'll immediately agree that brexit is good and they should give us whatever we demand

time to wheel this one out again

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxpYW_w5pgo

https://www.lrb.co.uk/v41/n13/james-wood/diary

^ can't say I got much out of this - just about worth a read but one of the things that it lacks: the fallout from Brexit could actually be the thing that breaks the Johnsons, Camerons and Rees-Moog's of this country. Its too easy to say they will get away with it just because that's how things have always been. They've had to adapt for their wealth (from Land to Hedge fund, although I am not sure that is even correct). Its not a thing I expect James Wood to get, not his beat anyway.

his beat is being wrong about things

.@Jeremy_Hunt: “When I went to Auschwitz I rather complacently said to myself, ‘thank goodness we don’t have to worry about that kind of thing in the UK’ and now I find myself faced with the leader of @UKLabour who has opened the door to antisemitism”https://t.co/cVn4fUB1hc

— Jewish News (@JewishNewsUK) July 2, 2019

Useful reminder that Hunt is every bit as malign as the other one.

Imagine going to Auschwitz and your takeaway being "this could never happen in MY country".

he's a fucking embarrassment.

Proud of y’all for getting on the humiliating buffoon as head of state train, it only took you three years

personally head of state since 1952, formally head of state since i guess 1660:
https://media.wmagazine.com/photos/5c2e6622f79bcc2d7b5a6262/4:3/w_1536/queen-elizabeth-frown.jpg

we've been on the train for a long time

It's more of a trollybus

nearly threw dab radio into a canal when Blunkett was telling a "hilarious" royal brown-nosing anecdote on last Friday's AQ to HUGE APPLAUSE and UPROARIOUS LAUGHTER. arrrgh!

Sorry, head of government, not head of state. I’m hungover at the airport lounge.

*tooled-up beefeaters head for the airport at a run*

lol

Tory leadership hopeful Jeremy Hunt admits he wants to bring back fox huntinghttps://t.co/Jns7f5G0Sx pic.twitter.com/bFvCk5EYxF

— Mirror Politics (@MirrorPolitics) July 3, 2019

💥Surge of anger about this from Jeremy Hunt. One Tory MP who was backing him now threatening to spoil their ballot. “Any doubt about whether he was just Theresa in trousers now removed”. Memories of the issue in 2017 GE still raw for some....💥 https://t.co/QNsJkhfhff

— Sam Coates Sky (@SamCoatesSky) July 3, 2019

Foreign onlooker q: when does BoJo vs Hunt actually get decided

monday 22nd july

Conspiracy theory: the Countryside Alliance policy he announced yesterday is to game the Google algorithm to bury any announcements about Liam Fox supporting Jeremy Hunt.

It really is a huge, huge deal to a large proportion of the only people who matter, though, iirc. Banning fox hunting is their Vatican II.

doesn't play well w the other people who matter (voters) though iirc

xp lol

xxp the hint that they would look at bringing it back in 2017 was electorally toxic though