The car's on fire and there's no driver at the wheel - The Tory leadership elections

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I've mentioned before but I've had cause to encounter Peter Hitchens at my place of work and he was extremely polite, pleasant and respectful - whereas Kwasi Kwarteng is a dick, though not as much as Andrew Gilligan, truly an obnoxious toad of a man.

John Harris is a Guardian columnist (Tom D.), Sunday, 9 June 2019 08:08 (four years ago) link

got to give him some credit; of the Britannia Unchained crew he's only slightly less thick as pigshit as Liz Truss is .. but only slightly... I love it when R4 gives him half an hour slots to make anodyne programs about the Empire that have the effect of leaving you feeling like you know less about a subject after wasting your fucking time listening to it.

calzino, Sunday, 9 June 2019 08:44 (four years ago) link

When he was Secretary of State, Michael Gove brought in a lifetime ban for teachers who used cocaine. pic.twitter.com/DYuGCOTZqb

— Steve Lapsley (@stevelapsl) June 9, 2019

what a loathsome little twat.

calzino, Sunday, 9 June 2019 16:22 (four years ago) link

Yes, but they weren’t ‘experimenting’.

Dan Worsley, Sunday, 9 June 2019 16:25 (four years ago) link

Chemistry teachers maybe

wake me up for "I Should Coco" (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 9 June 2019 16:32 (four years ago) link

Someone has to show the kids how to manufacture crack-cocaine in your kitchen, vital life skillz!

calzino, Sunday, 9 June 2019 16:37 (four years ago) link

Mildly interesting skim on Boris' operation this time around.

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2019/jun/09/boris-johnson-kept-from-media-in-ruthlessly-organised-campaign

No mistakes this time. If he gets there he'll save it for his negotiations with the EU.

xyzzzz__, Sunday, 9 June 2019 17:13 (four years ago) link

there is only so long you can hide the cunt in a box or as the The Graun would have it a "ruthlessly organised" campaign of great professionalism!

calzino, Sunday, 9 June 2019 17:33 (four years ago) link

Maybe now would be the time for journalists to closely scrutinize Johnson's financial supporters and allies rather than next year after we're in Mad Max world

wake me up for "I Should Coco" (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 9 June 2019 18:16 (four years ago) link

Could non-subscribers have a few paras of that?

suzy, Sunday, 9 June 2019 20:26 (four years ago) link

If you google the title you can click through from search results and view the full thing.

stress tweeting (gyac), Sunday, 9 June 2019 20:29 (four years ago) link

Most Tory candidates also speak cheerily of “no-deal Brexit” as if it were an end state, and Britain could live happily ever after in autarky, sealed off from a continent with which it has traded since the Bronze Age (and where it currently buys insulin and time-sensitive cancer treatments).

this can't be repeated enough fucking times to these "put no-deal on the table" numbskulls as well as the demented head-bangers.

calzino, Sunday, 9 June 2019 20:36 (four years ago) link

Anyone watching the contest to become British prime minister has to wonder about the cognitive skills of many Conservative candidates. Put simply: are these people stupid? They include several Brexiters who have put Brexit at risk by repeatedly voting against real existing Brexit. Now most of them are promising to renegotiate the UK’s withdrawal agreement with the EU, even though the Europeans insist they won’t renegotiate, having already refused to do so with Britain’s last two prime ministers, Theresa May and David Cameron. Plainly, the EU cannot cave and give Britain a sweetheart deal, or else every member state would want one and the single market would fall apart. Yet Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn plans to renegotiate, too.

Most Tory candidates also speak cheerily of “no-deal Brexit” as if it were an end state, and Britain could live happily ever after in autarky, sealed off from a continent with which it has traded since the Bronze Age (and where it currently buys insulin and time-sensitive cancer treatments). Meanwhile, Conservative MPs, the people choosing the shortlist of two candidates, keep making basic factual errors about Brexit.

What explains the poor cognition of Britain’s governing class, which, unlike voters, is supposed to grapple with policy detail? Here are some possible explanations:

• Many Tories are cynics faking it. They publicly back no deal, knowing it would be a disaster, but are counting on the rest of parliament to stop it. They just want to sound hard, because they live in fear of deselection by their hard-Brexiter local parties. Tory MPs know that the job market for ex-Tory MPs is currently pretty weak.

• The corollary: there is no political advantage in grasping reality if your voters don’t. Steven Sloman, cognitive scientist at Brown University, points out that most people cannot describe the workings of a toilet. The EU and the international trade system are even trickier. Sloman says the only way to handle complex issues is therefore to listen to experts. Politicians sometimes did that, until populism came along.

• Widmerpoolism. Kenneth Widmerpool, the creation of English novelist Anthony Powell, has become a byword for the blind will to power. Educated at a school modelled on Powell’s Eton, Widmerpool builds a glittering career (including a stint as MP) on tireless manipulative infighting. Powell’s insight applies here: after correcting for birth, power goes to the people most committed to getting it.

• An inability to admit past error. If you have supported Brexit for years, you will look silly if you let new information nuance your views. Recall how Dominic Raab was mocked for confessing he “hadn’t quite understood the full extent” of the UK’s dependence on the Dover-Calais crossing for trade. Karen Bradley received similar treatment for admitting that she only discovered while Northern Ireland secretary that Northern Irish nationalists “don’t vote for unionist parties and vice versa”. It’s safer for politicians to be consistently wrong.

• If your genuine beliefs contradict reality, deny reality. Tory MP John Redwood is a fanatical Brexiter. So when he wrote that the UK’s exit bill on leaving the EU was “Zero. Nothing. Zilch”, as if Britain held all the cards, he was probably forcing himself not to see reality. A related Tory trait is what the French call volontarisme: the notion that willpower can change reality.

• Denying reality proves your fanaticism to other fanatics. Tory MP Daniel Kawczynski tweeted in February: “Britain helped to liberate half of Europe . . . No Marshall Plan for us only for Germany.” In fact, as thousands of people swiftly told him, Britain was the Plan’s largest beneficiary. Yet Kawczynski stood by his false claim for two weeks. By holding firm against reality, he signalled his loyalty to the cause.

• Laziness. In the British gentleman-dilettante tradition, many Conservative politicians leave boring detail to civil servants. Added to that is the callowness of today’s Tories, the luckiest members of the luckiest British generation in history. When you know your class will always prosper, you can afford airy gambles. Hence Cameron’s bet that a referendum would put the European issue to bed, reunite the Tory party and see off the threat from Nigel Farage.

• Stupidity and ignorance. Some people sound stupid or ignorant because they are stupid or ignorant. That could explain the Tory MP Nadine Dorries’s complaint that May’s deal would leave the UK without MEPs after Brexit; or MP Andrew Bridgen’s belief that “English” people are entitled to ask for an Irish passport (that Ireland is a forgotten British possession probably played a role too).

Ignorant people can succeed if success depends on other, unrelated qualities. Many companies promote good-looking people. The Tory party promotes articulate public schoolboys.

In the classic essay “The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity”, the late Italian economic historian Carlo Cipolla warned: “A stupid person is more dangerous than a bandit.” He explained: “Stupid people cause losses to other people with no counterpart of gains on their own account. Thus society as a whole is impoverished.” Let’s hope the next prime minister is merely a bandit.

calzino, Sunday, 9 June 2019 20:37 (four years ago) link

that is great, but nothing we didn't know already

imago, Sunday, 9 June 2019 20:46 (four years ago) link

there's something particularly juicy about a really devastating list of bullet points, i agree

imago, Sunday, 9 June 2019 20:47 (four years ago) link

this longer version of that Lorraine Kelly/Esther McVey clip might be the most brutal thing I've ever witnessed pic.twitter.com/B8NTPes6uT

— Matthew Champion (@matthewchampion) June 10, 2019

I bet this isn't the first time this has happened to McVey.

calzino, Monday, 10 June 2019 10:51 (four years ago) link

Victoria Derbyshire competing with Lorraine Kelly for the best 30 seconds of morning television today. pic.twitter.com/sdvP657ftZ

— Jono Read (@jonoread) June 10, 2019

lool

calzino, Monday, 10 June 2019 10:59 (four years ago) link

i will never tire of people calling jeremy cunt by his name

also that lorraine kelly diss is brutal

God may judge you but his sins outnumber your own. (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 10 June 2019 11:02 (four years ago) link

:)

imago, Monday, 10 June 2019 11:18 (four years ago) link

Rory Stewart, the international development secretary, has just told the World at One that he has secured the eight nominations he needs to ensure that he will be on the ballot for the first round of voting by Tory MPs on Thursday.

also did u know he walked across afghanistan and speaks dari

God may judge you but his sins outnumber your own. (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 10 June 2019 12:32 (four years ago) link

Esther McVey has officially launched her leadership bid with a speech to the ultra-Brexit Bruges Group in which she pledged to deliver no deal by not allowing MPs any votes on the departure process ahead of the 31 October deadline.

lorraine kelly, we need you now more than ever

God may judge you but his sins outnumber your own. (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 10 June 2019 12:33 (four years ago) link

Hahahahaha LOOOL

Jeremy Hunt: “Where’s my wife?” pic.twitter.com/31nuHeudik

— Matthew Champion (@matthewchampion) June 10, 2019

suzy, Monday, 10 June 2019 12:45 (four years ago) link

Wow. A very aggressive man has just stormed the stage accusing the audience of fake news and calling MPs traitors for supporting May’s Brexit deal. pic.twitter.com/LM4QMxwA7P

— Thomas Colson (@tpgcolson) June 10, 2019

does it ever occur to these people how irresponsible they’ve been?

stress tweeting (gyac), Monday, 10 June 2019 13:03 (four years ago) link

lol no

God may judge you but his sins outnumber your own. (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 10 June 2019 13:05 (four years ago) link

or alternatively lol yes but they don't care

God may judge you but his sins outnumber your own. (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 10 June 2019 13:05 (four years ago) link

at least the strategy of keeping boris bolted inside an armorgard box keeps the security requirements low, but perhaps that fucking shouty idiot was a boris fan?

calzino, Monday, 10 June 2019 13:09 (four years ago) link

"The Diary of Boris Wimp"

Mark G, Monday, 10 June 2019 14:22 (four years ago) link

The clown car of Conservative candidates answers questions from CH readers
https://www.conservativehome.com/tag/15-questions

stress tweeting (gyac), Monday, 10 June 2019 17:02 (four years ago) link

Stewart and Johnson with far far more comments/questions than any of the others.

nashwan, Monday, 10 June 2019 17:28 (four years ago) link


14. From reader hertscommuter: What is the naughtiest thing you have ever done?

This is a slightly difficult question for someone who spent quite a number of years working in Iraq and Afghanistan, but I expect by naughty you mean something less intense. My mother would probably say that when I was nine, against her instructions, I sat on a cactus and she had to spend the next hour picking prickles out of my back side.

Jesus Christ.


3. What would you do to strengthen the Union?

I am a passionate Unionist – part Irish, part Scottish, part English. I set up the Hands Across the Border group during the referendum on Scottish Independence. As Prime Minister I would seek to build on this record to heal some of the tensions that have bedevilled our Union in recent years. I am clear that a No Deal Brexit would do immeasurable damage to our Union, and so have ruled it out. This is particularly true in Scotland and Northern Ireland where secessionists see No Deal as the ultimate opportunity to seize their objective. I do not believe that any leader of the Conservative and Unionist Party should take such a reckless gamble. Instead, I will establish the position of First Secretary of State for the Union, with real heft and budget within Government, to ensure that, as we leave the EU and build a greener, fairer future for our country, we look to strengthen our Union wherever possible. I have already visited Scotland and Northern Ireland as part of my campaign and I passionately believe that more dialogue and understanding between our constituent nations will help strengthen us. One of the ways I would seek to foster this is through an enhanced National Citizen Service. This would be a compulsory month-long programme bringing together 16-17 years olds from all over the UK to develop life-skills and build relationships that will help better prepare them for adult life.

Ffs!

stress tweeting (gyac), Monday, 10 June 2019 17:36 (four years ago) link

.@michaelgove picks Queen’s “One Vision” as his campaign song pic.twitter.com/46jUoO0Azi

— Robert Peston (@Peston) June 10, 2019

Ein Fleisch, ein Blut,
ein wahrer Glaube.
Ein Ruf, ein Traum,
ein starker Wille
Gibt mir ein Leitbild.

ShariVari, Monday, 10 June 2019 17:43 (four years ago) link

So the only candidates who couldn't get enough support to get on the ballot are Cleverley and Gyimah, hmm, wonder if there is any sort of pattern here...

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Monday, 10 June 2019 17:47 (four years ago) link

(xp) One cokehead showing his appreciation for the work of another cokehead.

John Harris is a Guardian columnist (Tom D.), Monday, 10 June 2019 17:48 (four years ago) link

All these coke confessions will get the biggest cokehead off all, BJ, elected won't it? :(

Uptown VONC (Le Bateau Ivre), Monday, 10 June 2019 17:51 (four years ago) link

Gyimah:

14. What is the naughtiest thing you have ever done?

It’s a long list, and not for public consumption, but I’d candidly suggest that standing for the Tory leadership on a second referendum platform must rank quite high.

i really, really, really, really, really, really like glue (fionnland), Monday, 10 June 2019 17:54 (four years ago) link

Aw bless kinda

Oy McVey (Noodle Vague), Monday, 10 June 2019 18:05 (four years ago) link


3. What would you do to strengthen the Union?

I have Welsh and Irish blood and spend part of my childhood in Scotland.

Ahhhhh Hunt ffs

stress tweeting (gyac), Monday, 10 June 2019 18:07 (four years ago) link


14. From reader hertscommuter: What is the naughtiest thing you have ever done?

It has to be falling off a table while dancing in a Soho bar and breaking my ankle while at my wife’s work leaving party. I was rumbled when I bumped into a journalist at St Thomas’s Hospital A&E (what were the chances) before taking Home Office Questions some days later – complete with a pair of crutches!

I also had to go to Algeria on a ministerial engagement as Immigration Minister. David Cameron, Nick Clegg and the Algerian Minister all thought my mishap was rather amusing. Theresa May, regrettably, did not. Still, that’s certainly naughtier than running through a field of wheat!

From Mark “qui?” Harper’s otherwise horrorshow of responses.

stress tweeting (gyac), Monday, 10 June 2019 18:12 (four years ago) link

(xp) He'll be used to being called Cunt then.

John Harris is a Guardian columnist (Tom D.), Monday, 10 June 2019 18:13 (four years ago) link

I assume Mark Harper's scraping up the 8 nominations is related to his previous job as Chief Whip.

I'm surprised that only Esther McVey went off the cliff on the following question:

2. “The UK should set a zero carbon target for 2050.” Do you agree and if so why?

If you want to guarantee failure, get politicians to set a target.

Preserving our natural environment is vital for the legacy we leave future generations and we must take action to combat climate change.

Our approach must combine the urgent need for action with protecting the livelihoods of working people. Reducing carbon emissions should be a continuous, dynamic process where we recognise the importance of technology and business in helping us achieve this. They don’t need targets – they just need government to stop slapping taxes on them.

We should recognise that it’s often working people in traditional industries who are expected to pay the price. Climate change affects us all, but this is a hard message to land with someone who has lost their job. It is also true that many of the measures proposed by more wealthy environmental activists would result in rising costs for working families.

Andrew Farrell, Monday, 10 June 2019 18:37 (four years ago) link

cbf to check the number but xps to AF - check this lad’s Wikipedia page for multiple lols

stress tweeting (gyac), Monday, 10 June 2019 18:40 (four years ago) link

This is a slightly difficult question for someone who spent quite a number of years working in Iraq and Afghanistan


https://giphy.com/embed/KWbmr5E1UdPUI

God may judge you but his sins outnumber your own. (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 10 June 2019 18:54 (four years ago) link

Can't the whole country just vote one of them off every week for the next couple of months instead of allowing 100,000 weirdos to do it for us?

Matt DC, Monday, 10 June 2019 20:09 (four years ago) link

missed this

The former equalities minister Maria Miller introduces Raab, saying one day she might convince him he’s a feminist after all. Gets a laugh. I don’t find it that funny.

— Beth Rigby (@BethRigby) June 10, 2019


Raab has some...interesting...views on feminism

stress tweeting (gyac), Monday, 10 June 2019 20:10 (four years ago) link

Matt DC OTM except the final two die together.

nashwan, Monday, 10 June 2019 20:13 (four years ago) link

raab is an MRA

||||||||, Monday, 10 June 2019 20:18 (four years ago) link

Raab has a lot of skeletons just waiting to tumble out wrt women (as does Johnson, obvs).

suzy, Monday, 10 June 2019 20:18 (four years ago) link

rory stewart’s book on afghanistan is not bad. he wipes his arse with a hand full of gravel at one point

||||||||, Monday, 10 June 2019 20:19 (four years ago) link


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