dear lord
― daenerys baker (darraghmac), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:40 (four years ago) link
def need a men-only thread for reading articles about fucking themselves
add it to the list
― daenerys baker (darraghmac), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:41 (four years ago) link
/theres-only-one-reliable-way-to-make-your-loads-bigger
― jmm, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:44 (four years ago) link
I never thought I'd see a more perfect Cosmo analog for men but there it is
― the girl from spirea x (f. hazel), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:45 (four years ago) link
What an interesting website for the Dollar Shave Club. I just learned that the FDA only recently approved an anal sex condom. I live for tidbits like that.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:48 (four years ago) link
the FFNGGHH ptesumably also involved
― daenerys baker (darraghmac), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:49 (four years ago) link
I think I just need to stop using the Internet for a year or two
― the girl from spirea x (f. hazel), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:50 (four years ago) link
today i learned about something called "scalp micropigmentation" (here is a GIS result https://www.google.com/search?q=scalp+micropigmentation&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiR7JvFjMHiAhVHnKwKHYnzDNwQ_AUIDigB&biw=2211&bih=1113) in which you can literally get millions of tiny dots tattooed on your bald head and apparently it is meant for people who want the look of a non-bald person who shaved their head rather than a balding person who shaved their head. you are still bald with this look, mind you - it is stubble tattoos not fake hear. you still have a bald head, but like, it's not a bald head it's a shaved head man. jesus fucking christ
― marcos, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:56 (four years ago) link
*fake hair
― marcos, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:57 (four years ago) link
men, always with the cosmetic trickery
― lumen (esby), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 15:59 (four years ago) link
This Mel website is informative.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 16:02 (four years ago) link
tbf i was fairly judgemental upthread. i can try and place myself more outside the experiences of others if it helps.
― FernandoHierro, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 16:11 (four years ago) link
contrapoints obliquely addressed this whole phenomenon in her latest video
"It must needs be remarked that the skull of the Chad ..."
"The one who showed up at the loft door with a box of diskettes from the Finn was a soft-voiced boy called Angelo. His face was a simple graft grown on collagen and shark-cartilage polysaccharides, smooth and hideous. It was one of the nastiest pieces of elective surgery Case had ever seen. When Angelo smiled, revealing the razor-sharp canines of some large animal, Case was actually relieved. Toothbud transplants. He'd seen that before.`You can't let the little pricks generation-gap you,' Molly said."
`You can't let the little pricks generation-gap you,' Molly said."
― Françoise, Laurel, and Hardy (K. Rrosé), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 16:14 (four years ago) link
hahaha, I thought of that too!
― the girl from spirea x (f. hazel), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 16:18 (four years ago) link
The fact that their current banner/logo says "MEL Beta" is probably doing them more harm than good, though.
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 17:43 (four years ago) link
I thought it was a joke.
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 17:44 (four years ago) link
Ugh, yeah I forced myself to ignore the beta in that context since the guys who sincerely try to use it to categorize their whateverness are trash anyway.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 17:49 (four years ago) link
https://www.theguardian.com/global/2019/jul/28/looking-for-mr-t-the-politicisation-of-testosterone-and-toxic-masuclinity
― pomenitul, Sunday, 28 July 2019 10:21 (four years ago) link
I pity the fool, indeed.
― Daniel_Rf, Sunday, 28 July 2019 15:17 (four years ago) link
yesterday marks the 4th time I saw a male friend/family member drinking a White Claw who immediately got kinda defensive about it
― frogbs, Friday, 16 August 2019 14:02 (four years ago) link
thought White Claw was pretty firmly positioned as the cool dude alcopop
― the girl from spirea x (f. hazel), Friday, 16 August 2019 14:15 (four years ago) link
only a matter of time before bros start icing bros with White Claw.
― Evans on Hammond (evol j), Friday, 16 August 2019 14:19 (four years ago) link
Seems like a lot of dudes operate under the misapprehension that if they're spotted using a product that doesn't reek of motor oil or have an X-TREME font splayed across its packaging that they'll spontaneously turn into an actual woman.
― Amply Drizzled with Pure Luxury (Old Lunch), Friday, 16 August 2019 14:38 (four years ago) link
Man if it were that easy
― president of deluded fruitcakes anonymous (silby), Friday, 16 August 2019 14:39 (four years ago) link
white claw tastes fucking disgusting though
― american bradass (BradNelson), Friday, 16 August 2019 14:39 (four years ago) link
It says 'hard seltzer' on the can, your balls are golden.
― pomenitul, Friday, 16 August 2019 14:42 (four years ago) link
true, nominal hardness in a product is a get-out-of-jail-free card
― the girl from spirea x (f. hazel), Friday, 16 August 2019 14:48 (four years ago) link
I never thought it was particularly marketed to men
at least not in the way MIKES HARD LEMONADE was
don't think it has much to do with the packaging (I think most of these people would be embarrassed to drink anything with a skull on it) but rather the perception that if you're drinking something alcoholic in a can it's gotta be beer
― frogbs, Friday, 16 August 2019 14:48 (four years ago) link
it's definitely marketed to men, they just seeded the Internet with memes instead of making obnoxious ads
― the girl from spirea x (f. hazel), Friday, 16 August 2019 14:51 (four years ago) link
did they really though
i'd totally buy that they paid the ain't no laws when you're drinkin claws guy, singlehandedly giving millions of dudebros permission to semi ironically drink a Claw
― frogbs, Friday, 16 August 2019 14:53 (four years ago) link
wait i thought white claw was clearly marketed to women? nothing says "ladies" like unsweetened fruity selzer with booze i have even seen stupid memes about it being for "hot girls only" i have ingested exactly 1 white claw and it was ok, unremarkable
― weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:00 (four years ago) link
Is it 'soft' seltzer, though? I think not!
(Grasping at straws, obv.)
― pomenitul, Friday, 16 August 2019 15:01 (four years ago) link
This is reminding me of when all the noize board kept talking about Sparks (the drink).
― Yerac, Friday, 16 August 2019 15:02 (four years ago) link
no because soft drinks = nonalcoholic, hard = alcoholic
― weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:02 (four years ago) link
white claw has succeeded in making everyone talk about it, and that makes me want to ingest it less
they're making like a half a billion dollars a year on the stuff, the idea that part of their marketing budget is paying people to generate memes is not a huge stretch
― the girl from spirea x (f. hazel), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:09 (four years ago) link
they're okay. I think they work better than all the hard-lemonade stuff (like Smirnoff or whatever) b/c that shit has tons of sugar in it so by the time you're on your 3rd one your stomach feels like it wants to fall out. White Claws don't really taste *good* but they're actually a bit better than putting vodka in a La Croix which I used to do a lot
― frogbs, Friday, 16 August 2019 15:10 (four years ago) link
It's 104 degrees here during happy hour, so whatever I am drinking, I'm drinking a Topo Chico along with it.
― the girl from spirea x (f. hazel), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:12 (four years ago) link
White Claw is good and it's a huge improvement over the previous Mike's Hard generation of malt beverages that had as much sugar as a mountain dew like if you are outside and don't feel like a beer it's p tasty
― Blues Guitar Solo Heatmap (Free Download) (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:13 (four years ago) link
I just assume that any sweet/fruity alcoholic beverage automatically codes as 'for the ladies' with dudes because I have gotten an endless stream of flak for the 'girl drinks' in which I've shamelessly indulged throughout my drinking career.
― Amply Drizzled with Pure Luxury (Old Lunch), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:26 (four years ago) link
hard seltzer is for everyone. it's the "I'm vaguely healthy or whatever but I'm having a drink" drink. Or what you have when you're definitely unable to have another heavy craft brewed ipa.
When you're definitely being healthy but want to get messed up? Well, we have a new contender: https://www.eater.com/2019/8/14/20805323/four-loko-hard-seltzer-sour-white-claw-14-abv
― untuned mass damper (mh), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:31 (four years ago) link
Unsweetened soda with vodka or gin drinks have been huge here for a couple of years and are not gendered (in the circles I travel in and in terms of advertising or packaging aesthetics)
― bookmarkflaglink (jim in vancouver), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:31 (four years ago) link
It's like the lacroix of alcohol
― bookmarkflaglink (jim in vancouver), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:32 (four years ago) link
pretty much!
I've noticed it taking over some of the space of cheap/light beer. So if you're a craft brew person and want to drink a canned non-beer beverage but beer snobbery is keeping you from grabbing a Bud Light, you grab a hard seltzer.
― untuned mass damper (mh), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:36 (four years ago) link
beer snobbery is keeping you from grabbing a Bud Light
Is that the only possible reason.
― pomenitul, Friday, 16 August 2019 15:39 (four years ago) link
my little brother thinks he might have a gluten sensitivity, he got drunk on White Claws and said it was the first hangover he ever had that didn't come with a massive stomachache
― frogbs, Friday, 16 August 2019 15:42 (four years ago) link
xp no
some bartending friends who worked an outdoor festival a couple years back that had a white claw sponsorship started pouring a shot of vodka in with a can of white claw over ice. it makes me think that, branding aside, the four loko people may have a market
― untuned mass damper (mh), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:45 (four years ago) link
― Amply Drizzled with Pure Luxury (Old Lunch), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:26 (twenty-seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink
cider
― phil neville jacket (darraghmac), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:54 (four years ago) link
bring back Zima
― Οὖτις, Friday, 16 August 2019 15:54 (four years ago) link
iirc Zima did come back a few years ago
it basically got laughed off in the late 90s then immediately was eclipsed by Smirnoff Ice and others which were basically the same sort of product
― untuned mass damper (mh), Friday, 16 August 2019 15:56 (four years ago) link