The car's on fire and there's no driver at the wheel - The Tory leadership elections

Hahaha Tracer, if *you* think someone’s a twig....

indeed

Give it to Stewart for this gurn alone.

https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/4dab3fe85ea10cd281a9b0e1cb06eeaacf5edcb5/0_0_2560_1536/master/2560.jpg?width=620&quality=85&auto=format&fit=max&s=42c68e9854a135ee8a3f0c708a6bb6de

It beats Raab squashing his face against a pane of glass.

Surprised Raab hasn’t been caught licking windows.

I had literally never heard of Rory Stewart before about three days ago.

I had, in the context of someone complaining a few months ago about one of the worst modern Foreign Ministers being at 75% approval on a conhome survey while Rory Stewart, who mostly just keeps his head down* and gets on with his work, is at 17%.

*I'm aware that being good at your work as a Tory makes you a bad person, but that's not a differentiating attribute as a Leadership Contest contestant.

No-one, not even Rory Stewart, hopes that Rory Stewart happens as much as Eddie Redmayne does.

r stewart wears a permanent look of having just been startled awake from some kind of eggy hibernation sac

god that new yorker profile of stewart is fucking perfect, i could read it over and over again

It is good.

Just had my mother on the phone feeling sorry for Theresa May, but interrupting with Trumpy talking points when I was trying to outline the Windrush scandal as part of the explanation of why I did not feel sorry that she'd asked for. Then she asked about ‘that Boris guy’ (she thinks he’s ‘creepy looking’) and actually allowed me to run down all the shitty things he’s done. Then on to Brexit itself: ‘why can’t they just have another vote?’

*headdesk* *headdesk* *headdesk*

Correction:
Marmite today, in the end better than more jam tomorrow.

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 26, 2019

Can't wait til this douche milkshake ducks himself

"Rory Stewart, who mostly just keeps his head down* and gets on with his work"

Not keeping his head down now is he?

xp Milkshake? Duck!

I promise I'll be done with Gove after this, but this monologue on the Scottish deserves to be seen. pic.twitter.com/PiAgabv3wg

— Chris Morris Bits (@chrismorrisbits) May 27, 2019

unsurprisingly he absolutely sucked at being young as well!

christ, in that thread there is something about young edge-lord Gove interviewing Alan Clark and during a conversation about Iraq suddenly displaying graphic pics of dead Kurdish chemical attack victims, including children straight to the fucking camera.

And laughing.

Now - if anyone is around and wants to talk - in Kew Gardens - for the next hour pic.twitter.com/E45A26Y5uR

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 28, 2019

Turn your location on, Gove!

TALK OR CHALLENGE ME U COWARD

I love Barking. Now moving up from McDonald’s to Costa - come and talk or challenge me pic.twitter.com/7XoCxuJl7G

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 27, 2019

BRB going to buy a gauntlet

A photo with an innocent black punter he’s met on the street? He’s got my vote!

Let's be fair to the intrepid fellow: Ludo from The Last Samurai would have considered him as a surrogate dad for at least three seconds. He can speak fucking Pashto after all

hey did u know rory was in afghanistan, nbd

Practising my now - rather rusty - Dari. #Barking pic.twitter.com/xaa0qjAkSL

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 27, 2019

Stewart knows Dari but not Pashto, whereas SV fave/leadership no-hoper Tom Tugendhat says he can speak Dari, Pashto, Arabic, as well as French (he is half French).

Hunt speaks French, Chinese and Japanese I think?

he's secured the crucial fatty soames vote

We need to come together as a party, and we need someone who can sort out Brexit, and restore pride, hope and confidence to Britain. That person is @RoryStewartUK. #Iamhonouredtosupporthimhttps://t.co/rfrjt93JFf

— Nicholas Soames (@NSoames) May 28, 2019

the only other underfed-looking posh people I can think of had sizeable opiate habits which I'm sure isn't the case here.

no point talking about politics to bookie degenerates, the average punter only reads the back pages of tabloid newspapers. Although they might mistake him for a jockey.

Hahaha he totally looks like a jockey.

Whoever would have though there was space for a British Beto O'Rourke

beto o'rourke is not an aquaphibian

https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/4RwAAOxyF0pThwEy/s-l300.jpg

Grauniad are doing a poll tracker.

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/ng-interactive/2019/may/28/tory-leadership-contest-odds-tracker-whos-up-and-whos-down

Or actually a not-poll tracker

"The percentages are the implied probabilities of each candidate becoming the next Conservative leader, based on the latest betting odds."

here's an idea - just show the betting odds instead, because turning into a percentage doesn't make it any more of a science!

whither nate silver in our hour of need

🚨 Tory leadership latest 🚨

Chris Grayling is *not* running for the Conservative party leadership. He will be backing "someone else".

— Sebastian Payne (@SebastianEPayne) May 28, 2019

They’ll be waiting with bated breath for his endorsement.

a shocking lack of vision from one of the conservative party's most accomplished frontbenchers imo

chris grayling, go on ballot

there have been many many jokes about the lib dems receiving grayling's application to be leader, guess this works with that

He considers himself a member of the lower-upper-middle classes which means – despite this accent – he’s quite posh but not properly so. Eton and Oxford, yes, but also – if briefly – the Black Watch and, eternally, Scotland too. I suspect he thinks of himself as an outsider on the inside; a member of the club but in some vague way not quite a full, or born, one.

That’s from https://blogs.spectator.co.uk/2019/05/the-refreshing-ridiculousness-of-rory-stewart/

ah yes, one of those classic outsiders who enjoys the patronage of the royal family

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/TOsOZmznPGc/hqdefault.jpg

^^^^

Officer class. Dad posted abroad at just the right time for the government to pay his son’s school fees - no flies on Daddy, apparently.

The Auld Acquaintance Cairn, near the border at Gretna, would be, he hoped, ‘a lasting marker of our union, something that future generations will look back at and remember, with deep gratitude, the moment we chose to stay together’. This was very Stewartish: slightly unworldly, romantic, and easily mocked. But even if Rory’s Cairn has been largely forgotten now, there are reckoned to be 100,000 stones there, brought to it by people from all across the United Kingdom. And it is still there.

me: https://caleythistleonline.com/uploads/monthly_2016_08/a2dw7lawtzjtwo0ibb48cpndsr6v7h.jpeg.169b7e4592f17fe58cbb03d9d5d5979d.jpeg