The car's on fire and there's no driver at the wheel - The Tory leadership elections

What, those Marxists?!

Matt Hancock, who is apparently the Health Secretary, has thrown his hat into the ring.

his perpetual beaming grin countenance will make him a hit with Cliff Richard fans.

Sad state of affairs when that insignificant little squirt thinks he can be come Prime Minister.

what's lower than 'the dregs'? May has long since passed the barrel scraping stage of Conservative talent.

I fear not!

Boris wins, don't think he'll call a GE though (also got to factor

Wouldn't be surprised to see a post-victory pivot of some sort though, maybe second referendum

xxp Mark Francois

Dancing on May's grave on Newsnight last night. Oddly enough it would've been an antidote to the 'she's human after all' dreck if it wasn't coming from such a disgusting place

I saw Owen Jones’s clip of him saying why May deserved no sympathy was doing numbers on US twitter last night, which was nice.

Banter heuristic: Johnson or perhaps Rees-Mogg sneaks onto the final membership ballot (with inevitable victory to come) by a margin of one or two votes, thanks to the three CUK defectors

I've worked out what Matt Hancock reminds me of - a vicar in an 80s sitcom whose daughter has brought a punk boyfriend to dinner.

Bananaman's prediction would be hilarious if it wasn't so terrifyingly likely to happen.

rory stewart has the only endorsement that matters

Thank you https://t.co/UaiseKqnWQ

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 25, 2019

lol

I saw Owen Jones’s clip of him saying why May deserved no sympathy was doing numbers on US twitter last night, which was nice.

Exceptionally good!

Cackling at the Hedges endorsement, that’s incredible.

God knows there’s enough of the other shite about. It’s bad enough the pious finger-wagging when these fucks die and you decline to pretend they were good people, we certainly don’t have to take it for a fucking career change

I also enjoyed Nicholas Winton’s daughter coming out to slap down May (figuratively) and Lord Dubs too.

any people talking about her premiership and legacy without even mentioning little things like Hostile Environment, two child tax credit rape clause, continuity Gideon austerity - the very things that make her widely reviled everywhere outside the tory heartlands, can totally get fucked. Sometimes OJ is a bit of a prat, but he was spot on yesterday I thought.

loving hancock's pitch. "vote for me, I'll lose to jeremy corbyn in a GE by christmas"

admin note, this^^^ is the thread for discussing these various bozos and why hunt will win

this other thread is for exploring why boris will lose:
the boris project: slouching blond beast who can or shrunken cowardly lump who was never going to

I think this leadership contest might be more unpredictable than people seem to be assuming . They couldn’t get rid of May earlier because there were too many candidates and factions.

— Wrath of Kahn (@allthatisol) May 25, 2019

I open up my ballot
And it's full of cunts

Any time someone professes to thinking Rory Stewart is ‘quite good, for a Tory’, I point them towards this magnificent New Yorker profile revealing him as a vainglorious berk who can barely boil an egg. https://t.co/JDOd2Z8M8u

— Elvis Buñuelo (@Mr_Considerate) May 25, 2019

He had discussed with friends an idea that might help prepare him: he would live in a housing project for two or three years, to better understand British poverty

lool, the children would eat him alive where I live!

I also enjoyed the bit where he describes himself as lower middle class and then there’s a quick segue to him tutoring Prince William and Harry on the basis of being friends with Prince Charles.

Royal Family notoriously middle class iirc

They didn't go to Eton after all.

His dad is officer/spy class but I suppose he’s not actually in The Peerage index so in his world, that’s non-U.

Something I've been wondering - it seems to be taken as read that whoever wins will be acceptable enough to the DUP to allow the government to continue. Is that actually the case?

they will play hardball with every option as ever: it's not abt acceptable so much as gameable

I presume the threat of Corbyn marxist govt is even more unpalatable to them, but they can't be happy with some of Mcvey's braindead pronouncements on the border question - not that she's a serious contender - but I think Raab and others are chatting similar shit.

Anyone going on about the backstop and how it needs to be time limited or abolished and how the evil EU are trying to “annex” NI is acceptable to them; the moderates (if they exist) trying to pass a similar deal will very much not be. Anyone inconvenienced by reality will have the support withdrawn.

Also there is as far as I can see no way around the big problem - that the pronouncements any candidate needs to make in order to win are the exact same things that will lead them to fail at the job, even on their own terms.

Yep. They can promise and even get no deal - but they will still need to sit down with the EU for a deal in the end.

Re: DUP. As long as the winner pays up I don't see the problem. All good bar the backstop.

the GFA binds the EU also :)

LOLz if the Maybot is replaced by the Raabot. Could barely manage about 30 seconds of Marr inteviewing a vacuum this morning.

He genuinely thinks being a lawyer is a selling point.

the winner will be the biggest wife guy = it will be hunt vs gove

= it will be hunt

Hmmmmm

https://i.prcdn.co/img?regionKey=iWqH6b7%2BNqrQaR9yb6gwrw%3D%3D&scale=100

Heard some joker (been watching too much marvel shit probs) referring to Gove vs Boris as a "tantalising battle" on 5live earlier.

if it involved heavy blunt instruments and was to the death, sure

I mean, it'll involve at least one.

If Miliband can't run the country because he eats bacon like a horse I demand Michael Gove be held to the same standard for these atrocities pic.twitter.com/5rUeMatc8U

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) May 26, 2019

There was a decent joke about Gove in here - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/ng-interactive/2019/may/25/stephen-collins-on-boris-johnson-cartoon

i just passed Rory Stewart in the street, giving an interview to camera, and he was shockingly thin and twig-like, which i probably wouldn't have noticed except his suit was so large in comparison, it looked like it was going to swallow him head-first

Do not underestimate the determination of the skeletal man.

Has 10 Downing Street ever been a tabloid-style "love nest" before? Or has every PM in living memory been a smug married (apart from Heath of course)?

he probably asked what language to speak

What I'm saying is this certainly didn't happen.

It’s probably the least of his problems today...

but what about Steven Pinker pic.twitter.com/YNwqNZ0SRM

— Matt Hammington (@MattHammington) July 7, 2019