Poll: what's the worst part of getting old?

i've been working lately to cut back on what i call my "old man noises" because they are, uh, incongruent

actually learning to move correctly is helping a lot - sitting down and standing up is less likely to provoke old man noises if i actually bend at the knees instead of just bending over all the time - but even if i do things "right" my spinal curvature does complicate things

and just as i posted that i'm starting to have extremely loud knee crepitus... it's harmless and there's no pain but yeah. old.

I've always had painless but loud knee crepitus so this is a part of getting old I will miss out on.

Worst part due to being in sales: painful feet. Argh

seems like having to piss used to be a calm, reasonable process. now i don't seem to get notice until it's urgent? wtf

prostate issue maybe

For me a glass of water is all it takes to be peeing every 20 minutes.

Free-floating irritability.

Regret

I wake up at four, can't get back to sleep, toss and turn a little bit....

then I get up and let go of about three pints of urine. "Huh," I think. "That might've been part of the problem right there."

Don't know where else to put this so I'm putting it here:

https://i.imgur.com/P9wKkWd.jpg

I get the I REALLY NEED A WEE thing. A bit has even escaped a couple of times. This was not in the brochure.

yeah... i have noticed this also. not a fan.

then I get up and let go of about three pints of urine

When I wake up in the middle of the night, Standard Operating Procedure for me for years has been to get out of bed and go to the toilet. About half the time it's the reason I woke up, and the other half of the time I probably need to go anyway.

Did folks notice a particular age when things started to really demand notice? I turned 44 this year and christ, a whole bunch of things seem to have suddenly sat up, desperate to be heard. 1) My eyes. I've barely noticed I had eyes for a good chunk of my life. Now I can't seem to read for longer than 15 minutes without the rest of the world turning to pixellated mush. 2) The aforementioned weeing. I teach. Twice this year I've had to bolt from the room because I thought I was going to piss myself. 3) Sciatica. Seriously, fuck off. 4) Varicose veins. I have one down my left leg that seems to be trying to escape the hard way. 5) Generalised stomach things. Like, I've always had a delicate tummy, but now I have to be really careful what I eat or I'll get gripey guts. I'm going to end up like Hunter Thompson on a diet of yoghurt and avocado. 6) Well, going for a shit. I was always a steadfast once-a-day man, now it's every two days and frequently not as satisfying as it once was. Also piles, though I reckon this is related to the rogue vein.

If I was a car, you'd jack up the windscreen wipers and put a whole new car underneath.

I've just finished a really, naked (almost viciously) naked autobiography, in case you wondered.

47 here.

For some reason I seem to need a piss about every two hours when I'm awake, but can make it through the night (6.5-8 hours, depending on the day) without needing to get up.

Sciatica is a definite issue. My back's been gnawing at me all week.

I've worn glasses since third grade, but lately (this year) I've developed an inability to read white type on a black screen without my eyes tearing up after maybe a half a page.

I have posterior-vitreous detachment, speaking of eye stuff.

Pro tip: exercise and practice balance and coordination bc the loss of that really sucks and makes a person FEEL the creeping age (speaking for self but I’m sure I’m not alone)

Forgot to vote in this

It's ok, I voted memory problems for you.

I turn 45 in a couple days. I got bifocals last year, and my back still hurts a month after going to the indoor trampoline park with my 4 year old and his friend and friend's dad. I kind of knew I'd be sore the next day but didn't expect it to be so severe.

I also went to the doctor for a big checkin and found out that I have both high liver enzymes and sleep apnea. The good news is that the former is quite often caused by the latter. I've had an at-home and overnight sleep study done and last night was the first that I spent using my new cpap machine.

I also bought beano yesterday so I could eat falafel and hummus for lunch without dying and killing everyone around me.

The increasing latency between mind and body.

I also bought beano yesterday so I could eat falafel and hummus for lunch without dying and killing everyone around me.

because ...you don't think it's funny? and usually read funnier comics at lunch?

i stopped midstep at a fellas desk today to discuss something with him and tweaked my MCL

ach, you athletes are always lording it, with your MCLs and whatnot. Whyn't you have ordinary muscles like the rest of god's creation?

Agree vehemently with the posters that commented on the loss of childlike enthusiasm/excitement being worse than any physical diminishment. I'm now to the point where my metabolism is definitely crashing, and my joints hurt on the regular, and my hair is long gone, except where I would rather not have hair, and yet all I want to be able to do is to attend a haunted hayride with the same level of thrill I had about it at age 13.

My tip for regaining it: learn a new skill. Be a beginner at something — anything that requires practice — the zing of being able to learn is wrapped up in that enthusiasm for me at least.

Id like to add “losing my balance” to worst things about being old. I’d love to feel super steady & nimble on my feet like I used to but every winter I live in fear of tripping, falling, and breaking myself.

Given that I lost my childlike enthusiasm/excitement when I was about 9, I'm having trouble relating.

I hate not being able to do more than ten minutes on the treadmill. Also having to spend a hundred dollars a month on face cream.

Here's something they don't tell you in the brochure: when you stab yourself, cutting the cheese, it takes a day and a half to start bleeding and another day and a half to stop.

What I've learnt is when I slip and fall in the mud in the dark and initially think: thank goodness nothing broken or sprained - I just look like a fool. But it takes three days for the pain to arrive these days, where I've pulled something in my side and now every time I even slightly strain my torso or even sneeze it hurts a lot.

Posterior vitreous detachment in both eyes now.

waking up at night to pee

― cum dude (Princess TamTam), Tuesday, May 10, 2011 10:48 AM

My biggest complaint atm. Last night was the first night in months that I made it through without having to get up.

Enjoy it while you can.

I have to get up in the night a couple of times usually, but it scarcely bothers me - unless I’m staying somewhere like a cheap hotel with a bathroom down the corridor.

I don’t fear dying, but I do fear marking as “so not gonna happen” to more and more things in my to-do list.

enjoying the randomness of how one body part will, for no good reason, hurt for a few days. then it goes away and some other body part takes its turn

Knowing the names of the last four UN secretaries- general but not the current one

I hurt my knee riding a bicycle on Friday! Didn't fucking do anything awkward or any cool tricks or anything. Was just riding and suddenly as I was pedaling downward there was pain.

Hangovers.

I only drink on rare occasions now, but inadvertently got wrecked at an xmas party last month and the hangover lasted for days.

I find I keep gagging on stuff - be it water, tea or my own saliva. Even my throat can't be arsed any more.

I definitely get things down the wrong pipe more. Vaguely concerned I am on the road to full out dysphagia. I should put in my advance directive that I would rather die from choking or inhalation pneumonia rather than go to pureed diet.

I’ve always had the wrong pipe problem, since I was a kid. I hasn’t harmed me so I’m not too worried.

Walked 12,000 steps for three days in a row in Boston last week in either Red Wing boots or Chuck Taylors and ... I am still paying for it big time. My lower back has never felt this ridiculously like a crypt-ready set of mismatched, ill-aligned bones. Bent over yesterday to put the leash on the dog and flat out ruined my back for hours and hours. Radiated pain felt like I'd been kneed in the groin.

And yet, the acute pain was for hours and hours, not days and days or years and years. So I guess it's not that bad just yet.

When I see this thread title I can't ward off "The best part of wakin up.... is Folger's in your cup!"

― 40% chill and 100% negative (Tracer Hand)

^^^ same for over 8 years now

I'm so old, I remember those old ads.

That was back before they were doing the incest ones.

The worst part of getting old is that there's so much more incest in advertising.

my left knee was throbbing during most of Little Women last night. I am going to have to start dropping some theaters based on what their seats/legroom inflict on me.

xp

Marry Yo’ Brothers?