Rate the people sitting across or next to you on public transport

aviator shades / pink linen blazer / chinos / jazzy socks / boat shoes-sporting tory-lookin dude in his 30s in first class carriage, downing one large bottle of doom bar and then spilling a second over the table / floor, staggering to the loo, coming back with blazer off and soaking wet, laying back in his seat, occasionally twitching, then after many hours of this, getting off at motherwell: 2/10, one point given for keeping the shades on well into the gloaming

Person playing reggae on the top deck of the bus, 8/10 cause I'm in a good mood even though I've just carried a screaming toddler for a mile and a half. Dropping to 4/10 when red red wine by ub40 started.

Woman spraying multiple perfume samples and eating multiple boiled eggs: minus infinity/10

i love them murder things though

yeaaah love them

dyou know who could murder me though that aaron hernandez fucking gorgeous

yeah hes really big

he could shoot me fuckin da id still climb him

Good to see the Welsh lads intimidated you out of yr pub

respect knuckles to the guy who brought a box of cereal, a bowl, a spoon, and a gallon of milk on the bus and proceeded to pour and eat a bowl of cereal, as well as offering some to his fellow passengers

yeah id go for that

xp sadly im off home ;_;

Sitting near someone with some of these stickers on his laptop

am I going to die lads

is that not some sort of steampunk thing

nope

a very US style "workout gear for troops, veterans, and the people who wish they were troops" brand but from the UK

like I said jim

anyway I’m off the train now, he’s free to sign his soldier F petitions in peace

'Hey, man, you spread any wider, something's liable to fall out of there.'

^ words I literally had to refrain from saying just now because I don't really need a black eye atm

But seriously. I think he's at risk of displagia. I'm concerned.

why can't people on trains just shut up

Had a good one the other day. Two guys - I think from Albania or somewhere in the Balkans - randomly punching each other in the chest, and when I say punching I mean with real violent force and then going back to looking at their mobile phones.

... on the bus home.