Literary Clusterfucks 2013

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This guy deserves to be dragged hard imo: https://www.scifiandscary.com/this-is-not-a-review-of-hells-shadows/

(The review included isn't well written, but I assume that's because they're amateur reviewers, which makes his screed even more pointless and shitty... and he wasn't even responding to the review itself, but just any hypothetical bad review.)

emil.y, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:16 (four years ago) link

omg that is amazing. Too many favourite quotes to list but:

"Another reviewer stated she liked the story 'a lot' better than J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter books"

Number None, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:33 (four years ago) link

More a 'kinda lol but mostly sad' story imo.

Uptown VONC (Le Bateau Ivre), Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:35 (four years ago) link

To the best of my knowledge, The Amulet's platform is absolutely unique. No one has ever read a faith-based tale like this one. Indeed, the prologue alone will make you think you're reading an Indiana Jones novel. Please note this: part one is the supremely eerie launch of the story. Will glue your fingers to the pages. Part two, nothing like part one, is the most intellectual part, the most provocative, that may cause a great many people to pause and consider what they've just read for certain passages are no less than startling. Part three is the mountainous dessert of the novel. Fasten your seat belt. The action never ends.

Given the intensely stirring premise that underpins this novel (as revealed by the conclusion of part one), you'll find out why the Hollywood executive wanted to speak with me if you choose to read the book. I will tell you that many of the story's scenes, beginning with the prologue, will almost jump off the page, their movie character so clearly obvious. And as you go, they only increase in scale and grandeur. Please enjoy The Amulet with my very best wishes.

mookieproof, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:38 (four years ago) link

the "mountainous dessert" is a technical term first used by northrop frye iirc

mark s, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:40 (four years ago) link

i myself am underpinned by an intensely stirring premise

mookieproof, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:42 (four years ago) link

You've gotta be a hustler if you want to get on i guess

Doctor Nu (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:45 (four years ago) link

This is just another level:

In the author’s note, Klein writes:

“And please note this – both novels were read by an entire Barnes & Noble store management team and were deemed so good by the two assistant store managers and the store manager that they were ordered and shelved right next to the works of Mr. King himself.”

Dean Klein, author’s note for Hell’s Shadows

emil.y, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:45 (four years ago) link

man, I bet Koontz was on the other side

Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Tuesday, 14 May 2019 19:48 (four years ago) link

You laugh, but consider how prominently jacket blurbs from Barnes & Noble store management teams are featured on your average Pulitzer Prize-winning novel.

the prologue alone will make you think you're reading an Indiana Jones novel

You know - one of those classic Indiana Jones novels we all love.

One Eye Open, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 20:25 (four years ago) link

The birth of a new copypasta is unfolding before our very eyes.

pomenitul, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 21:06 (four years ago) link

Think you've read just about every type of haunted house story out there? Uh uh. Not like this one. You won't have a clue as to what happens next. Hell's Shadows is a wild tale of two people whose deep love for each other is severely tested by a house and the unfathomable creatures within it. And outside it. Gil and Robin Turner reside in the most haunted house of all time, a house so dangerous the Turners come to realize the house itself is hell itself. Evil. Deadly. Alive.

Hell's Shadows was inspired by the great and classic film, Poltergeist. Here, however, every character, every relationship, every place, thing and supernatural occurrence has been vastly increased in intensity.

mookieproof, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 21:29 (four years ago) link

i highly recommend indiana jones and the hollow earth

difficult listening hour, Tuesday, 14 May 2019 22:23 (four years ago) link

Will glue your fingers to the pages.

I appreciated this image.

A is for (Aimless), Wednesday, 15 May 2019 00:45 (four years ago) link

sci-fi self-publishing scene appears to the the absolute fucking worst

akm, Wednesday, 15 May 2019 02:44 (four years ago) link

Wow

Careless Love Battery (James Redd and the Blecchs), Wednesday, 15 May 2019 09:57 (four years ago) link

sci-fi self-publishing scene appears to the the absolute fucking worst


what about ya

maura, Wednesday, 15 May 2019 15:13 (four years ago) link

ya don’t need to be rude, they were just stating an opinion

milkshake chuk (wins), Wednesday, 15 May 2019 15:16 (four years ago) link

"My ability to conceive and prepare prose are off the chart high."

<3

jmm, Wednesday, 15 May 2019 15:16 (four years ago) link

same

mark s, Wednesday, 15 May 2019 15:18 (four years ago) link

ya don’t need to be rude, they were just stating an opinion


ahaha
(i meant young adult but you probably figured)

maura, Wednesday, 15 May 2019 15:22 (four years ago) link

isn't ya all speculative sci-fi these days anyway

imago, Wednesday, 15 May 2019 15:25 (four years ago) link

"My ability to conceive and prepare prose are off the chart high."

Can we get a board description change, please? Even one of the minor, underused ones will do.

two months pass...

https://slate.com/culture/2019/07/delia-owens-crawdads-murder-africa.html

I had, in fact, only heard of this book because my sister read it for a book club, she said it was bad. Somewhat concerned that this story is going to drive me to read an ultra-long Jeffrey Goldberg article.

JoeStork, Tuesday, 30 July 2019 15:30 (four years ago) link

I am all in favour of wildlife poachers dying horrible deaths, so I have no problems with this writer's murky background.

Yeah this thing is weird since this seems to be pretty common knowledge—something her publisher def knows about. I think maybe the goopy Reese Witherspoon connection makes it a strange contrast.

I couldn’t find any info but I’m going to assume that poacher they killed was black

Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Wednesday, 31 July 2019 12:57 (four years ago) link

lol at However, the Wikipedia entry for Owens comes as only the fourth result when you Google her name

Screamin' Jay Gould (The Yellow Kid), Wednesday, 31 July 2019 13:02 (four years ago) link

I am all in favour of wildlife poachers dying horrible deaths

Tbh this in itself would be one thing, but the whole 'white saviour' thing makes me feel pretty unsympathetic to these people.

emil.y, Wednesday, 31 July 2019 13:59 (four years ago) link

xpost I love how the media is full of these stories that are just the writer discovering an article from less than 10 years ago.

Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Wednesday, 31 July 2019 14:08 (four years ago) link

three weeks pass...

God I loathe the petty and abusive statusgrubbing of men like that. Hope he sinks.

president of deluded fruitcakes anonymous (silby), Friday, 23 August 2019 04:55 (four years ago) link

two months pass...

Bestselling Authors Band Together to Dunk on a College Student

https://jezebel.com/how-to-use-the-fictional-teenage-girl-1839863520

mookieproof, Thursday, 14 November 2019 20:48 (four years ago) link

Every time this thread gets bumped I assume YA fiction is involved.

pomenitul, Thursday, 14 November 2019 20:51 (four years ago) link

Why are people who exclusively consume culture made for children always so angry about it

― A funny tinge happened on the way to the forum (wins), Tuesday, March 5, 2019 7:03 PM (eight months ago) bookmarkflaglink

YouGov to see it (wins), Thursday, 14 November 2019 20:58 (four years ago) link

We are very sorry to @SarahDessen for the comments made in a news article by one of our alums in reference to our 2016 Common Read. They do not reflect the views of the university or Common Read Committee. (1/4)

— Northern State U. (@NorthernStateU) November 13, 2019

pathetic!!!!!!

j., Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:06 (four years ago) link

One of the tweets Dessen liked yesterday read “Stop shaming girls for the things they enjoy.” But what about shaming them for the things they don’t enjoy?

Not enjoying something is self-evidently negative and counter-productive and deserving of our suspicion.

pomenitul, Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:10 (four years ago) link

hmm. Not sure about this one. The "college student" graduated in 2017, was quoted in an article saying: “She’s fine for teen girls. But definitely not up to the level of Common Read. So I became involved simply so I could stop them from ever choosing Sarah Dessen.” Dessen shares the quote with the girl's name scribbled out, with a "authors are humans too" message, then I suppose her followers start trashing the girl? Fans suck, I guess.

Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:13 (four years ago) link

Like is Dessen not allowed to comment on stuff people say about her in print?

Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:14 (four years ago) link

lol 50% of the fans in her replies are fellow YA authors who are like 40, they think they're 'standing' with someone because 'it could be any of us'

j., Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:16 (four years ago) link

wonder if ya authors' toxic defensiveness stems from their insecurity over taking the easy money way out

maura, Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:16 (four years ago) link

PK the problem is that she extracted an apology from the college and hounded the student off twitter, using her follower-clout, for voicing the relatively non-challoppy op that maybe college students should read books at grade level, an op that you would think a successful (?) author could let be aired with a bit more grace

j., Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:18 (four years ago) link

tears

Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:21 (four years ago) link

Dessen also provided zero context for the quote and basically invited her followers to go on the attack.

jmm, Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:21 (four years ago) link

p much the same as every artist who links to a negative review

Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:22 (four years ago) link

Authors are real people. We put our heart and soul into the stories we write often because it is literally how we survive in this world. I’m having a really hard time right now and this is just mean and cruel. I hope it made you feel good. pic.twitter.com/tt2CN13n2a

— sarahdessen (@sarahdessen) November 12, 2019

what good is being a successful best-selling author if one young woman in south dakota doesn't like your work? ;_;

mookieproof, Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:23 (four years ago) link

p much the same as every artist who links to a negative review

well yeah, which is corny and shld generally be beneath most artists above age 18

“Hakuna Matata,” a nihilist philosophy (One Eye Open), Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:25 (four years ago) link

from her TL it looks like dessen intially ID'd the woman then thought better of it and deleted the tweet and replaced it with the one w/her name redacted, too late for her fans (and ppl who called her out for bullying)

“Hakuna Matata,” a nihilist philosophy (One Eye Open), Thursday, 14 November 2019 21:34 (four years ago) link


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