I don't know what to say
There is no synapse between the author's ear and their didactic facilities
― flamboyant goon tie included, Sunday, 21 April 2019 05:58 (four years ago) link
This review reads like the author is looking at old nudes and saying "yep I was nude at this point in time"
― flamboyant goon tie included, Sunday, 21 April 2019 06:00 (four years ago) link
Not gonna deny that Floral Shoppe’s, um, *checks Wikipedia* “tin anniversary” deserves some commemoration, though
― You can't see it but I had an epiphany (Champiness), Sunday, 21 April 2019 16:50 (four years ago) link
I always find it amusing that Vaporwave seemed to take off around the same time that Pitchfork decided to shut down Altered Zones.
― MarkoP, Sunday, 21 April 2019 16:55 (four years ago) link
i still believe in post-internet optimism
― flopson, Sunday, 21 April 2019 21:36 (four years ago) link
Cheesy saxophones melted into ooze, easy listening skipped and tripped over itself like a buffering YouTube video, and vaguely human voices were slowed into breathy, bland moans. The first time I hit play in the spring of 2012, it stopped me in my tracks. I stared at my iPhone wondering if it was broken or if the file was corrupted. It sounded like the musical equivalent of a computer virus, as if all the exciting ideas at the time about “post-internet” music had soured and gone flat.
lol
― flopson, Sunday, 21 April 2019 21:44 (four years ago) link
"musical equivalent of a computer virus" is actually a nice line.
― Totally different head. Totally. (Austin), Monday, 22 April 2019 01:28 (four years ago) link
They've really been bringing the old-school takedowns latelyhttps://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/sad-planets-akron-ohio/
― change display name (Jordan), Monday, 22 April 2019 18:32 (four years ago) link
The band’s press materials indicate that Akron, Ohio exists as a result of two good buddies hanging around the studio and seeing where the spirit takes them. But to insist that the rest of the world needs to hear their wankery is an assertion of rampant egomania
I hate when writers deploy the canard of musicians "insisting" or "demanding" their music be heard as a takedown. It's not like they forced it onto everyone's phone like the U2 album.
― One Eye Open, Monday, 22 April 2019 21:34 (four years ago) link
That is - deploying, as a takedown, the canard of musicians insisting etc. Long workday, brain not make sentences good.
― One Eye Open, Monday, 22 April 2019 21:37 (four years ago) link
Ah yes, the rampant egomania of releasing a record (which may be true, but that goes for everyone else too).
I have no interested in that record, but yeah that's super lame.
― change display name (Jordan), Monday, 22 April 2019 21:43 (four years ago) link
It's the dude from the Black Keys, too. pfork biting the hand that feeds them?
Also, I would like to posit that the attitude of a musician / band releasing a recording to satisfy their collective egos is no different than a writer publishing their takedown of said recording.
― Totally different head. Totally. (Austin), Monday, 22 April 2019 21:51 (four years ago) link
bbbut guys, they're not just musicians, they are out-of-touch male musicians please don't forget
― flamboyant goon tie included, Monday, 22 April 2019 22:30 (four years ago) link
it's hilarious that that is a Black Keys guy's project becuase my first thought was "why is P4k reviewing/slamming a band no one's heard of?"
bet they wouldn't dare give a BK album a 3.0. 6.3, sure, but not 3.0. *that* would be biting the hand that feeds them. this is just sort of gumming it. so pathetic.
― alpine static, Monday, 22 April 2019 22:37 (four years ago) link
reminds me of when Arcade Fire made fun of Stereogum as part of their album rollout. Not P4k or RS or Spin, but Stereogum. Big tough anti-establishment band!
― alpine static, Monday, 22 April 2019 23:03 (four years ago) link
“gumming the hand that feeds you” is an amazing image
― flappy bird, Tuesday, 23 April 2019 01:03 (four years ago) link
I assumed Stereogum was in 4th place after those 3 for music blog popularity.
― billstevejim, Tuesday, 23 April 2019 14:50 (four years ago) link
Bullies prefer to pick on people a few steps down in the pecking order ime
― these are not all of the possible side effects (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 23 April 2019 15:46 (four years ago) link
arcade fire is a totally a band of bullies.
i knew there was a reason i didn't like them all along.
― Totally different head. Totally. (Austin), Tuesday, 23 April 2019 15:58 (four years ago) link
xxxpost to billstevejim: that was my point. they didn't mess with the big boys. they went down the line just enough to pick on a site that people (in that world) know but that couldn't hurt them quite like the others.
it's not really analogous to the P4k review of the Black Keys side project, just kinda made me think of it ...
― alpine static, Tuesday, 23 April 2019 16:05 (four years ago) link
Are the Black Keys a hand that feeds P4K in 2019? Seems like exactly the kind of band they'd give a bad review of these days.
― Greta Van Show Feets BB (milo z), Tuesday, 23 April 2019 16:54 (four years ago) link
yeah, their last album (in 2014) got a 5.8
― We were never Breeting Borting (President Keyes), Tuesday, 23 April 2019 16:57 (four years ago) link
black keys are loved by rolling stone and grammy noms. they never struck me as a pitchfork favorite.
― billstevejim, Tuesday, 23 April 2019 18:36 (four years ago) link
all their early albums got good reviews from 7.5 to 8.3 for Magic Potion
― Blues Guitar Solo Heatmap (Free Download) (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, 23 April 2019 19:06 (four years ago) link
Black Keys were past their sell by date by the time they became an arena rock band, I guess around 2014. a 5.8 sounds about right for former favorite gone big. I thought the Arcade Fire trashing was much more surprising and bold, at least for p4k in 2017.
― flappy bird, Tuesday, 23 April 2019 19:17 (four years ago) link
they did also poke fun at the hollywood reporter
― maura, Tuesday, 23 April 2019 21:53 (four years ago) link
Ya sorry but music writers have never had to face even a modicum of the level of entitlement, resentment, intrusiveness and abuse that musicians face every day from punters, fans, journalists, family and friends.
― flamboyant goon tie included, Tuesday, 23 April 2019 22:41 (four years ago) link
woe to the music writer who’s said a harsh word about an arena-filling act thoughfeel like musicians get their art assailed and critics get their existence as a human attacked. not exclusively, but more often in those terms
― mh, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 03:24 (four years ago) link
No, musicians have their entire existence and personhood threatened on a daily basis by the nearest possible asshole
I track textbook abusive patterns in the way that even “respected” journalists report on and speak on the works of musicians. Even in this thread, a group of extremely kind and generous individuals have been determined to be “bullies” off the back of a poorly realized promo campaign
The irony is that most music writers, once they themselves publish, have that epiphany where they see how musicians feel every day— Ann when her book got middling reviews, Carl when his book got celebrated by the wrong people, Maura when she herself faced a mob of entitled crowd-funders, and on and on and on. You literally have no idea what it’s like until you experience it yourself
― flamboyant goon tie included, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 04:06 (four years ago) link
I’m sorry. All of that is completely wrong and I’m sorry that’s come your direction
― mh, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 04:21 (four years ago) link
Dogg, dudes/chicks in indie band have weird stalkers and shit, which is not like someone blowing up your menchies because you said ‘My Teenage Dream Has Ended’ is more of a feminist statement than ‘Lemonade’
― ebro the letter (Whiney G. Weingarten), Wednesday, 24 April 2019 04:30 (four years ago) link
noted
― mh, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 04:44 (four years ago) link
Ya like I have two dudes who send me semi-annual death threats. One of them still habitually e-mail-harasses my ex, with whom I broke up with three years ago.
If I were to go into detail about the sexual harassment I've experienced you'd have a panic attack, and like, I'm a DUDE.
It's not really about me either, musicians face an incredible amount of dehumanization, it's always been the case and it's getting worse; apparently, to the point where a musician can't call themselves "queer" unless they actively are engaging in queer sex at that exact point in time, or a musician can't be a landlord, or a musician isn't allowed to clap back at a bad review without the entire internet calling her "entitled" or "diva" or a purveyor of "a terrible look"
― flamboyant goon tie included, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 04:50 (four years ago) link
Anyway, speaking of shit that musicians probably shouldn't say, when is that paywall on Pitchfork going up? Every musician and every label is waiting with baited breath
― flamboyant goon tie included, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 04:52 (four years ago) link
I’m goin to outright disavow how I phrased things earlier and just agree that the criticism of where an artist stands and the perception of who they “really are” has taken a weird turn in public perception and discourse and the ability to make work, and have it commented upon without it becoming this assault on character, is fucked up
I’d have put things a lot more effectively if not for my continued naivety and thanks for the reminder, which should have been unnecessary
― mh, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 05:07 (four years ago) link
Ugh I’m not railing at anyone in particular and I think I’m being perhaps a little nasty and I apologize if so
I’m just exhausted beyond exhausted
― flamboyant goon tie included, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 05:14 (four years ago) link
You people who write about pop acts really have it rough! You should switch to writing about jazz, where no one gives a fuck what you say (because no one's reading it; the magazines are all subsidized by ads from music schools and instrument manufacturers).
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Wednesday, 24 April 2019 10:32 (four years ago) link
(i think you might be confusing me with someone else fgti? but i definitely had to face entitled portugal. the man fans. over thanksgiving. that sucked.)
― maura, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 13:08 (four years ago) link
That sounds awful! And no I’m thinking about the magazine, and a frustrating moment when boarders were like “I paid for a subscription, where’s my product” to a point where I wanted to email everyone a benzo but my memory might have been paraphrasing in my annoyed state last night
― flamboyant goon tie included, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 13:14 (four years ago) link
I read yr jazz columns religiously & much of my listening traces to stuff i learn there, fwiw, unperson -- I can't keep up myself & am grateful for that work
― she carries a torch. two torches, actually (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Wednesday, 24 April 2019 14:19 (four years ago) link
Oh, I know I have readers, but the idea that I might get waves of frothing, rage-filled email because I dared to criticize Kurt Rosenwinkel, for example, is totally alien to me. There's one dude, a bassist, who I know hates my writing, but we have each other blocked on Facebook so I never really have to worry about him. (I once reviewed an album he played on and discussed every other member of the group but totally ignored his contributions, and he actually expressed gratitude; that's how much he hates me.)
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Wednesday, 24 April 2019 14:29 (four years ago) link
And thanks for reading, btw! You and I disagree on a lot of stuff, but we agree on a lot, too, and you've definitely turned me on to some things in the past, like that Italian power metal band whose name escapes me at the moment - something about Frost or Winter.
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Wednesday, 24 April 2019 14:31 (four years ago) link
I think every writer can get haters. I've had the drunk director posting a tirade on facebook about how I'm a psycho rapist, and the leader of the association of Danish cinemas sending me twitter messages late at night saying I should be put in a mental institution. Oh yeah, and a photographer talking about gathering a group of strong guys and getting me into a truck and making me see things a different way. I think the key is to write about feminism.
― Frederik B, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 14:47 (four years ago) link
Was it this truck?
https://nw3tonyc.files.wordpress.com/2014/04/hunk.jpg
― Evan, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 15:50 (four years ago) link
oh yeah! everyone was really nice about it tbh. it just became unsustainable (probably because i didn't have anyone funding it). life!
― maura, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 15:52 (four years ago) link
Ah so <3 it was such a good magazine!!
― flamboyant goon tie included, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 15:55 (four years ago) link
thank you!! i miss it!!
― maura, Wednesday, 24 April 2019 16:20 (four years ago) link
it was indeed v unsustainable
i tried to make an archival website for maura mag two years ago but the web designer ghosted me about halfway through the process. if anyone here wants to help i have a very difficult to parse xml file and some money to offer
― american bradass (BradNelson), Wednesday, 24 April 2019 16:25 (four years ago) link
portugal. the man fans. over thanksgiving.
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Wednesday, 24 April 2019 16:46 (four years ago) link
portugal, the man vs maura, the mag
― Simon H., Wednesday, 24 April 2019 16:51 (four years ago) link