US Politics April 2019 Thread: 'I find that pretty hard to believe'

https://www.republicanleader.senate.gov/newsroom/press-releases/mcconnell-op-ed-time-to-stop-the-democrats-obstruction

The balls on this motherfucker.

I wondered why Merrick Garland was trending on Twitter this morning.

It's time for McConnell's organic composition to stop obstructing the will of the Grim Reaper.

@ Alfred

Tucker Carlson: “Chris Hayes is what every man would be” if feminists had absolute power https://t.co/62lOieLxIw

— The Daily Beast (@thedailybeast) April 2, 2019

FOX News hosts have started creating commentary using MadLibs? I guess this has been coming for a long time - and now here it is at last.

I guess that was a joke, but why should we care about anything Tucker Carlson has to say, fuck him

ah yes hyper-masculine he-man... Tucker Carlson

We shouldn't, but he is an effective propagandist with a huge platform. He should be used

...as a rug.

Tucker Carlson is what every man would be if ...

Fungus could talk?
They were grown in vats?
All children were hated by their mothers?

His face is a diaper rash

in a decent society mcconnell would be put up against a wall and [redacted]

I guess that was a joke, but why should we care about anything Tucker Carlson has to say, fuck him

its not

Well, it is but only inasmuch as it was an agglomeration of words that came out of the face hole of Tucker Carlson.

He's not even trying anymore.

I know he claims to have given up drinking more than a decade ago, but nothing he says nor his choice of face lotions suggests he doesn't pour a fifth of bourbon in his coffee every hour.

In that rant, absolute feminism leads to needing eyeglasses?

Low-T is worse than a carotene deficiency wrt man vision.

I just had to review Tuck Carlson's history. His mother ran off to France when he was 6 to be free. This all makes sense now. At least he's not a serial killer. Probably because his daddy remarried rich.

Women who don't actively want children, should not have children and should be free to make that decision. Otherwise, you get Tucker Carlsons and serial killers.

But you repeat yourself.

I don't think we can say with 100% certainty that there isn't some overlap between those two categories.

xpost ha

"Their mother, Lisa McNear Carlson, left the family when he was six. “Totally bizarre situation—which I never talk about, because it was actually not really part of my life at all,” Carlson told The New Yorker in 2017.""

Sure, Tuck.

Tucker's mom otm

tucker’s not crying, YOU’RE crying

Twitter has apparently alerted me to Chris Hayes' considerable MSNBC-watching mom lust.

I’m ok with everyone being Chris Hayes. pic.twitter.com/kLCeHy5FqG

— chalin (@chalin) April 2, 2019

I like Chris Hayes. I've never seen his show, but I enjoy his podcast and Twitter presence.

twitter presence by Chris Hayes is my favorite cologne

yea Chris Hayes is very good, probably the only nightly news show I'd actually watch

even the dirtbag left seems to like him.

he looks like he smells nice

on a more serious note, he was the only person with a national TV platform to devote a segment to Puerto Rico last night

Shithead still doesn't know PR is part of the USA

https://thehill.com/homenews/administration/436867-trump-the-best-thing-that-ever-happened-to-puerto-rico-is-president

NC GOP chairman indicted

https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article228727949.html

“We’re letting people have a week to say, ‘Investigate the investigators!’ Take the victory lap, everyone agrees. Spike the football,” the first senior White House official said. “But then we need to put this behind us. Let’s not relive this. Let’s not drag Andrew McCabe in front of a panel or something that goes on forever.” The senior official said this view was widely held inside the White House.

For this to be successful, the president — who is, after all, still reliving the events of the 2016 Republican primary and general election, a tale more than three years old at this point — would need to seal himself off in a cocoon and emerge another man.

http://nymag.com/intelligencer/2019/04/trump-aides-fear-he-is-overselling-his-exoneration.html

Trump just said "my father is German, was German. Born in a very wonderful place in Germany." Fred Trump was born in New York. pic.twitter.com/U6eWYPzjrJ

— Tommy MMXIXtopher (@tommyxtopher) April 2, 2019

I mean, this guy spearheaded the Birther movement... just amazing.

Trump accidentally revealing that he's the illegitimate son of an actual, historical Nazi afaict

he'll just say that he meant to say grandfather, which is true, if he even bothers to say anything about it at all

He never misspeaks though.

Something fishy about this trump guy

Trumpito muttering "oranges" every time he's trying to say "origins" just makes me a little more hopeful his Vito Corleone end is nigh.

lol

Trump is like if Fredo made his way to the top.

evol, I assume you're suggesting that if Trump were to pull the old 'orange rind in the mouth' routine to scare one his grandchildren, he would immediately drop dead from the shock of suddenly coming into physical contact with fruit for the first time in his life.

Secret Service agents arrested a woman at President Trump’s Florida resort this past weekend after she was found carrying two Chinese passports and a thumb drive with malicious software on it, according to court documents.

Prosecutors allege the woman, Yujing Zhang, first approached a Mar-a-Lago security checkpoint on Saturday shortly after noon and told security officials she was there to go to the swimming pool.

“Zhang was asked if the true member . . . was her father, but she did not give a definitive answer,” according to the criminal complaint filed by Secret Service special agent Samuel Ivanovich. “Zhang additionally did not give a definitive answer when asked if she was there to meet with anyone. Due to a potential language barrier issue, Mar-a-Lago believed her to be the relative of member Zhang and allowed her access onto the property.”

Once inside the grounds, Zhang was approached by a receptionist and asked why she was there.

“After being asked several times, Zhang finally responded that she was there for a United Nations Chinese American Association event later in the evening,” the complaint said. “The Receptionist knew this event did not exist” but when the agent, Ivanovich, followed up with further questions, Zhang allegedly said she had arrived early for the event so she could “familiarize herself with the property and take pictures.”

At that point, Zhang presented documentation that she said was her invitation to the event, but it was in Chinese and the agent could not read it.

Agents then took Zhang to a different location to interview her, at which point she became “verbally aggressive,” according to the charging document.

“During the second interview of Zhang, she claimed her Chinese friend ‘Charles’ told her to travel from Shanghai, China to Palm Beach, Florida, to attend this event and attempt to speak with a member of the President’s family about Chinese and American foreign economic relations. Agents were unable to obtain any information more specifically identifying Zhang’s purported contact, ‘Charles’,” the complaint said.

Zhang also told the agents that she had never claimed she was going to the pool.

After Zhang was stopped and questioned, a search of her belongings turned up four cell phones, a laptop, a hard drive, and a thumb drive which contained “malicious malware,” according to the criminal complaint. Authorities said that despite her initial claim to be headed for the pool, she was not carrying a swimsuit.

She is charged with making false statements to a federal law enforcement officer and entering a restricted area.

Forget it, Jake

I know, I know, *NO COLLUSION* but somehow a Secret Service agent assigned to Mar-a-Lago has the last name Ivanovich.

They actually released a photo of Ivanovich:
https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/villains/images/2/20/Boris_Badenov.png/revision/latest?cb=20180811204159

Mueller is a Republican, let's remember, and, also, he believes indicting a president would upset our constitutional norms as much as letting Donald J. Trump occupy the Oval Office for 18 more months or another six years.

In other words, a classic Beltway stooge.

xp it wasn't a close ballot (60/40) but if the last time you checked on turnout was the day after the election, remember that 50% (and climbing) of CA voters who do vote do so by post and don't show up in the "turnout was terrible" takes everyone insists on writing the morning after.

p.s. impeach barr. he deserves it.

word ^

meanwhile at home

The 2019 election will boast the highest enrolment rate in Australian history (96.8%) and a record enrolment rate for young Australians (88.8%), in figures released on Tuesday.

9.7% of enrolled voters are now between 18 and 24. fuck 'em up, millennials

Mueller is a Republican, let's remember, and, also, he believes indicting a president would upset our constitutional norms as much as letting Donald J. Trump occupy the Oval Office for 18 more months or another six years.

on the latter part, he was following justice department guidelines, as ill-suited for our current times as they may be. on the former, he's a republican who oversaw a damning document (and with excellent prose, as you noted!) of a sitting republican president. once you've been the lead author of a 450 page report that features hundreds of instances of the president being a crook, it would seem that opening your mouth to let someone know that the attorney general is mischaracterizing your report isn't such a big step

Pretty clear that the "irritation" of Barr and his aides is that Mueller had presented them with a report designed for public consumption and clearly aimed at Congress. In other words, he seriously complicated the cover up plan.

— Josh Marshall (@joshtpm) May 1, 2019

whoops, meant to include this as well

the true nature of the irritation becomes clear down in the Times story pic.twitter.com/0IoiG5r5VJ

— Josh Marshall (@joshtpm) May 1, 2019

he's a republican who oversaw a damning document (and with excellent prose, as you noted!) of a sitting republican president. once you've been the lead author of a 450 page report that features hundreds of instances of the president being a crook, it would seem that opening your mouth to let someone know that the attorney general is mischaracterizing your report isn't such a big step

Yes, and that's partly why he made the prose so transparent. He's also a wuss.

Not really surprising like it isn't the first time Barr helped bury bad news. Jeeze you even had Ollie's name come up this weekend too...

How did Mueller not understand that the first thing people heard about the report would have a bigger impact than totality of the 450 pages, as absorbed by a sensitive and objective reader? In Trump’s America?

He seems like naive and kind of dumb or else complicit in—if not the cover up—positioning this so it fizzled out. Between this and rosenstein praising trump’s warmth and humor i just

Treeship

lol

Treeship again otm

You guys can think trump is warm and humorous if you want

Xps

I want to kiss his KFC-stained mouth.

People not understanding Mueller’s adherence to his clearly restricted remit and his obeisance to hierarchy: he’s a Marine, sorry

― El Tomboto, Tuesday, April 30, 2019 4:49 PM (four hours ago)

I guess, but it's just so weak

Sounds like its the DOJ not Mueller not allowing a date to be set for a hearing. Him still currently being an employee of them.
Which sounds like obstructing justice in itself don't it?

When the bots get a little confused about today's mission...

My husband a New York City firefighter for 15 years will be voting Trump 2020 all the way!!

— Fuck Donald Trump (@gIamourizes) May 1, 2019

Not even the bots are immune to meltdown may

seems like it was a different avatar and name, trump retweeted it, then the owner changed display name and avatar to this. classic twitter move

Lindsay Graham to kick things off:

HIllary
Hillary
Hillary
etc

anyone watching the barr hearing or are we just scandal'd out for the decade

hadrian and me are not scandal'd out

obv I hate myself

without a doubt

if i was burned at the stake i would ask for a mirror

it's May yall

I see Barr's m.o. of boring his enemies to death is in full effect.

Close thread...?

can we keep assessing relative merits of teacher scabbing first

may 2019: NNNGGHHH my teeth are gnashed to pieces

bruxit is how we're all gonne die

GNASH MY TEETH INTO PIECES

THIS IS MAY POL'TICS THREAD

this lindsey graham line of leading questions is so fucking pathetic . he is such an embarrassment

how is it possible to be as bad as Diane Feinstein is at this

omg Barr is just spewing reprehensible bullshit making up endless excuses for Trump. What the fuck ?! why the fuck did i watch this ?

xp yes! she should be fucking his shit up right now

if i was burned at the stake i would ask for a mirror

may thread title imho

rofl "if he felt the investigation was unfair it's okay to obstruct!"

What the hell, Lindsey?? pic.twitter.com/4DhtqEXs4Y

— Vic Berger IV (@VicBergerIV) May 1, 2019

Done!

grassley's old fucking corpse up there talking about a dossier .

US Politics May 2019: " If I was burned at the stake, I would ask for a mirror"