♫ Your NOMINATIONS for the best songs under 2 minutes poll ♫ (nominations close MARCH 1ST)

Maher Shalal Hash Baz has several of these iirc, they’re all very cute. That albums with Bill Wells ls golden.

I like the versions on Osaka Bridge better than Gok.

oh 2:00 exactly doesn't count? Kinda dumb rule

Yes, let's go over that again.

(reads OP)
oh it's mookieproof's fault

I want him to go over that again and again for all of eternity until he learns the consequences of what he has done

Two double entries I have spotted in the spreadsheet:

Thanks! I’m surprised there aren’t more - I haven’t done any cleanup whatsoever on it yet, as I’m waiting to do the basic entry first before sorting and looking for little mistakes.

Guided By Voices - "Dropping the Bomb" (1:30)

imo hold the poll until every eligible gbv song is nominated

They get written faster than we can add them. There's been 3 new GBV songs since your post, imago

we should just do a quick 24 hour poll of all the nomd GBV songs and only the top 3 are eligible for this.

i went through several more hundred today. about 350 more to go, i think.

i sent these songs to hell:

crystal stilts - love is a wave (2:00)
vashti bunyan - find my heart again (2:01)
vashti bunyan - 17 pink sugar elephants (2:49)
the nerves - when you find out (2:01)

for those who have missed it, playlist link: https://open.spotify.com/user/weinventyou/playlist/5NYa3dBthFiDcftI0ObtC3?si=n2br2BTtTceH5v0JuKNYyQ

thx for all your work
lxy and i were listening last night and she xsaid “what if these were in order by release date?” not sth for you to do karl obv but an interesting thought exercise
also bunker hill wtff wow

Approaching the end of the playlist. Fortunately I was paying just enough attention to terminate Frank Zappa's Pound for a Brown before I'd listened to all SIX MINUTES AND FIFTY SECONDS.

the nerves - when you find out (1:58)
https://www.discogs.com/composition/32c97e51-fb26-432b-ba9f-23e0924452ca-When-You-Find-Out

Are we still nominating?

oic, n/m

Approaching the end of the playlist. Fortunately I was paying just enough attention to terminate Frank Zappa's Pound for a Brown before I'd listened to all SIX MINUTES AND FIFTY SECONDS.

― large bananas pregnant (ledge), Wednesday, March 6, 2019 3:21 AM (four hours ago)

That's the wrong version, the original on Uncle Meat is 1:29.

I'm surprised nobody nominated any pre-"Cooky Puss" Beastie Boys tracks. (I just heard them for the first time last night.)

I forgot to nominate anything because I was too overwhelmed with my own personal list of candidates but the overall nom list is like a billion times more overwhelming (and has 90% of what I'd thought of) so no matter

I am psyched for the madness

vashti bunyan - 17 pink sugar elephants (2:49)

― Karl Malone,

Wait a minute:

https://open.spotify.com/track/0oyRMmcAE31mHIM9NdempL?si=lxDD1XBCQGa6i6oe0ul4IQ

It’s 1:52 on spotify... which one are you looking at?

It’s also shorter than 2 minutes on youtube and discogs and rym... I want to know which version is this that amounts to 2:49 because I want to hear it and also I demand 17 Pink Sugar Elephants to count because it’s one of my fave songs ever. I protest.

treasure your <30-second songs: https://qz.com/1563588/4-songs-on-when-i-get-home-may-earn-solange-no-money-from-spotify/

Moka I’ll check it again when I get home - it was late at night and I was very tired so it’s possible/very probable that I was just doing something silly

Not sure if it makes a difference but Discogs has Elvis Costello & the Attractions - No Action at 1:58 on the old Rykodisc reissue CD (and 1:57 on the original LP). This would be in my top 10.
https://www.discogs.com/Elvis-Costello-This-Years-Model/release/1493731

Also I listened to that Vashti Bunyan song on Spotify and can confirm there is like a solid minute of silence after it ends for no reason.

noticed another spotify omission

Jumping Fences: https://open.spotify.com/track/6Y9WuYN6OfMIzKeEgx6El5?si=_67D8xYHSQafM8wsoEGRVw

thanks for the last handful of corrections! i added the nerves "When you find out", costello's "no action" and vashti bunyan's "17 pink sugar elephants" back to the nominations list, and added the correct version of the zappa song to both the noms and spotify playlist.

this is purely a weird executive decision but for songs that are 2+ minutes on spotify but listed as less elsewhere, i'm adding them to the nominations list but keeping them off the spotify playlist. this is 99.9% because i enjoy the satisfaction of scrolling through thousands of songs, and every single one of them is less than 2 minutes, without exception. i hope that won't make defenders of those songs angry, but they will still be votable and you can and should campaign the hell out of them in the voting thread.

imago jumping fences is in the playlist, i checked!

although i admit i'm thinking of making the 2:49 spotify version of '17 pink sugar elephants' as the last song on the playlist, just so some wiseass will think "Hmph! they messed up the last song, dillweed!" before listening and being humiliated by the fact that there's a minute of unnecessary silence on the end, and clearly it was placed there for prankster reasons

The version I linked to above does open shorter than 2 mins for me, is it 2:46 for you?

lol km

yeah, it's very odd! when i open your link on the web version of spotify, i see the 1:51 version (although the song in question is one of the few that is grayed out/unplayable). but when i search for it on my regular desktop version of spotify, the version of the album that comes up is split up into two discs, and the version of "17 pink sugar elephants" that shows up as the 13th track is the last song of disc 1, and it's 2:49 (and playable).

wait nobody nominated “tea for the tillerman” ?

noooooooooo

added

haaaaaappyyyyy dayyyyy

ween - what deaner was talkin' about (1.59)

2:00 on spotify, and 3:12 on both discogs and allmusic? deleted for now

Frankie Valli & the Four Seasons - Walk Like A Man (1:53)

the original version of this is about 2:18. the 1:53 version is the lame re-recording of it for the jersey boys soundtrack. *burns it in hell*

Super Furry Animals Do or Die 1:59

2:06 on spotify, allmusic, and discogs

*does not, dies*

holy shit, i reached the end

1793 songs nominated.
average song length: 1:32
30 guided by voices songs
24 minutemen songs
17 TMBG

the spotify playlist includes 1,470 songs and is 38 hours, 28 minutes long. the top 100 results will be 200 minutes long, probably more like 150 minutes. it's going to be good!

since it's getting late tonight and i for once i have plans outside my living room on friday evening, i will post the voting/campaign thread on saturday, most likely early afternoon.

in the meantime, though, here is the nominations list: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1VWy_tN0EBkQRieqebbWX9mzFacs7bjwdTzltCpLW_uE/edit?usp=sharing

it would be great if anyone could scan the list and check for mistakes (Misfits vs The Misfits, typos, doubles, etc). I know I'm the typo king of ILX, which really just means i am very careless and don't have respect for my own typing/writing, but i did my best to be very careful as i entered all of this in. but i'm there are fuckups.

if you have questions/concerns about a song around 2:00 that isn't included, now would be the time to register your complaints. as i hope i've demonstrated upthread, i try to be flexible and to admit when i've been a bit ol' dumbass. BUT, once i start the voting thread, my aim is to make any changes at all to the nominees list - i don't want to switch things up once the voting period is open. so now is the time to yell at me.

my policy on the ~2:00 songs changed throughout the thread. sorry. it ended up something like this: if a song was 2:00 or more on spotify, i tossed it out, just so i had some sort of standard to decide what made the cut. BUT, spotify obv isn't perfect, so if discogs or allmusic listed it as below 2 minutes, i counted it as eligible - but usually only if someone complained. there were just too many songs near the edge of eligibility to check every single one, sorry. i only landed on this process partway through the process of entering everything in, so it's possible/likely that some songs that are 1:59 on discogs didn't make the nominations list because it was 2:02 (or whatever) on spotify.

so yeah...that's messy. sorry. so now is the time to check your nominations against what's in the list and yell at me to make changes. i will try to be reasonable.

once i start the voting thread, my aim is to make any changes at all to the nominees list

speaking of big ol' dumbass typos, i meant my aim so to NOT make any changes to the nominees list once the voting period is open. bedtime for bonzo

i meant my aim so to NOT

so, correction there, i meant *passes out*

234uprjaods;f

*barfs*

*turns cheek in the barf*

also, here are the shortest nominations:

Descendents - Weinerschnitzel 0:10
Joni Mitchell - I's a Muggin' 0:08
Electrelane - Come Back 0:07
Johnny Hawksworth - Thames Television ident theme, c.1968-90 0:07
Suzanne Ciani - Pop & Pour Coca (Cola Logo) 0:07
Brian Eno - The Microsoft Sound 0:06
Descendents - No! All 0:04
John Lennon - Nutopian International Anthem 0:04
Limmy - Wrong Way Down A One Way Street 0:04
Sore Throat - Three Seconds Long 0:03
George Brecht - Comb Music 0:02
Napalm Death - You Suffer 0:02
Wehrmacht E! - 0:01

between now and saturday i will post a draft points structure (both unranked and also tiered) just so we can iron out any wrinkles before the real voting thread

thanks, Karl. my Suburbs noms got dropped (and they really belong):

The Suburbs - Cows (1:38)
The Suburbs - Cig Machine (1:25)
The Suburbs - Chemistry Set (1:11)

I ported the Spotify playlist over to Apple Music with Tune My Music and ended up with some odd results, including some songs by Juliet and the Spirits (none of which are under 2 minutes) that I can remember loving and now can't find any mention of the band online at all?

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarg, somehow i missed a big chunk of the thread, near the end, starting with the fIREHOSE songs, and including about 10210414031048 colonel poo nominations. fuuuuuuuck. i'm just going to do it now.

yay!

poking around the doc

Ramones/The Ramones
Residents/The Residents

And foh with two different versions of "Pay to Cum," the O.G. 7" version is better, just go with it

Billie Holiday Lover, Come Back to Me 1:49

a dozen different versions on spotify, all longer than 2, most by a fair stretch

thanks whiney, making those changes now

god's work KM!