the life-changing magic of tidying up

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kondo is great. accumulating too many possessions is bad.

Trϵϵship, Tuesday, 22 January 2019 19:36 (nine months ago) link

Just hearing about this book / TV series over the last couple of weeks is basically giving me palpitations, and I'm going to find any way I can to mute it from everywhere I go.


I never got attached to things. Absolutely zero bonding. Maybe I have that from my grandmother and my dad. The first had zero attachment to things (and pple lolz). My dad maybe bec he was a salesman? Who knows. But me? I could leave everything behind and not shed a tear. Also, I love throwing out/giving away things. But I can understand how painful it must be when someone else decides to destroy your things.

nathom, Tuesday, 22 January 2019 21:06 (nine months ago) link

🖼


"Goodbye sucker, thanks for nothing."

nathom, Tuesday, 22 January 2019 21:07 (nine months ago) link

I watched one ep -- to me it kind of sounds like every other "life changing" thing that only changes your life for about two weeks before you start to slide. Also, fuck folding t-shirts into little nugget shapes.

Getting rid of excess stuff is good, but you need to address the in-door and not just the out-door, i.e. how to avoid buying stuff you don't need in the first place. Otherwise you're just performing routine maintenance on your excessively consumeristic life. I find that we often go through that process of "Oh, x thing is ugly and doesn't serve a purpose" but then we wind up buying y thing that we convince ourselves will make our lives better than x thing did, and it doesn't. Same happens with clothing -- getting rid of stuff I wound up not wearing doesn't prevent me from falling for the same add'l 40% off sale items "well it's not exactly the color I want" trap over and over again.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, 22 January 2019 21:11 (nine months ago) link

isn't the idea that between the shock-awareness of doing it all at once (and seeing what your life can be like with less clutter), and the various little moves of being aware of each little thing and whether it sparks joy etc., that you're training yourself in a more mindful way of relating to possessions?

not that that precludes any backsliding!

|Restore| |Restart| |Quit| (Doctor Casino), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 00:34 (nine months ago) link

Otherwise you're just performing routine maintenance on your excessively consumeristic life.

what's wrong with routine maintenance?

sarahell, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 00:56 (nine months ago) link

I think the point was that it would be more lasting and sensible to reject an "excessively consumeristic life" than to merely maintain it in a way that makes it more tolerable.

A is for (Aimless), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 01:07 (nine months ago) link

I think that to do a solid job I would need a dedicated amount of space and a sustained amount of time - neither of which is likely to become available in the near future.

I can nibble around the edges for minor quality-of-life improvements. A few days ago I cleaned out a coat closet. Donated outgrown coats, pitched solo mittens, unsentimentally jettisoned maybe 15 of the 25 scarves we've accumulated (almost all gifts, btw). I have never bought a scarf; I have worn a scarf maybe three times in my life. But I have gotten a scarf for Christmas at least 10 times in 47 years.

I can pretty readily do the same to the "stupid board games with one essential part missing" shelf. (Mostly gifts.) And the art supply bins in which fully half the markers have dried out, or half-abandoned craft projects. (Mostly, you guessed it, gifts.)

Sometimes seems like it's less our own purchasing habits, and more the well-meaning grandparents/aunts/uncles at birthdays and Christmas. We try to direct them away from giving Stuff. But for some folks the idea of a huge pile of gifts under the tree is a marker of love, and I can't always head it off.

Then there are the boxes I'd really like to go through to see what's in them. I don't have space or time to lay things out on a table even long enough to sort into piles (bills to pay, personal memorabilia,concert and movie ticket stubs, work samples, kid artwork, trash, stuff that is OBE, stuff that will never matter again, stuff I will be heartbroken to lose, etc.).

We need the table because that's where we eat. I get halfway through one pile and it's dinnertime again. Where does the stuff go? Back into the box labeled something like "miscellaneous personal save, 1994-2019"

Gunther Gleiben (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 01:50 (nine months ago) link

at least change the label to "half-sorted miscellaneous personal, 1994-2019"

A is for (Aimless), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 01:54 (nine months ago) link

I would actually enjoy 'tidying up" peoples spaces. But I would be the opposite of Marie Kondo and probably traumatize people about all the decisions they made in their life.

Yerac, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 01:59 (nine months ago) link

Yerac, lol. "You paid ACTUAL money to see Limp Bizkit? In two thousand FOUR?"

Gunther Gleiben (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 02:09 (nine months ago) link

I would make them tell me about the show first and their favorite lyric.

Yerac, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 02:16 (nine months ago) link

Otherwise you're just performing routine maintenance on your excessively consumeristic life.

what's wrong with routine maintenance?

― sarahell, Tuesday, January 22, 2019 7:56 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I think the point was that it would be more lasting and sensible to reject an "excessively consumeristic life" than to merely maintain it in a way that makes it more tolerable.

― A is for (Aimless), Tuesday, January 22, 2019 8:07 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Right, it's this. So many times I feel like we have gotten rid of something we "don't use" only to replace it with something else we convince ourselves will serve the same purpose better, and then we don't use that either or it's equally lacking in longevity. Purging consumer goods can easily become an integral part of consumeristic habits instead of an antidote to them--an essential part of dealing with the inflow of stuff rather than a means to a more minimalist life.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 15:12 (nine months ago) link

I appreciate that someone wrote this article. I couldn't articulate a lot of this before . I think someone mentioned on the netflix thread about her shinto mindset.

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/marie-kondo-white-western-audineces_us_5c47859be4b025aa26bde77c?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000046&utm_campaign=hp_fb_pages&ir=Entertainment&utm_medium=facebook&utm_source=women_fb&fbclid=IwAR3N6HJMCDeFg9bYOTmG1howmeMOI5WV3KQnPpirnwCGJddHvlM07lpI9nQ

Yerac, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 15:26 (nine months ago) link

interesting, but it also seems absurd that that joking tweet about books required an apology

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 15:44 (nine months ago) link

Oh, I didn't even see that. My tweet blocking powers are getting stronger and stronger.

Yerac, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 15:48 (nine months ago) link

also totally makes sense to me because the little once more religious Jewish voice in the back of my head said "that's idol worship" when I was watching it, lol

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 16:00 (nine months ago) link

thx for that article Yerac

Nhex, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 16:51 (nine months ago) link

I think the point was that it would be more lasting and sensible to reject an "excessively consumeristic life" than to merely maintain it in a way that makes it more tolerable.

― A is for (Aimless), Tuesday, January 22, 2019 5:07 PM (yesterday)

this is kinda like my "waiting for the revolution" type anarchist friends that don't see the point of voting or getting involved in any form of activism that doesn't result in overthrowing capitalism, the patriarchy, etc.

sarahell, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:27 (nine months ago) link

lol what? It's nothing like that.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:29 (nine months ago) link

it kind of is because you are going to accumulate things and clutter and stuff you don't need because that is life in America, sorry.

sarahell, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:30 (nine months ago) link

or stuff you want for a while and then don't want -- consumerism is like gravity at this point -- sorry, this is just how I feel and also true

sarahell, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:32 (nine months ago) link

Buying behavior can just as much be altered as hording behavior. Of course no TV show is going to focus on not buying stuff though /trench

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:34 (nine months ago) link

imo it's a trickle-down effect, by making you reconsider what you want to keep it makes you reconsider what you've been buying, and what you'll buy in the future

omar little, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:37 (nine months ago) link

whether you buy it yourself, or receive it as gifts from well-meaning family members, like YMP's, you are gonna end up with a bunch of stuff you end up not wanting ... maybe not as much, but ...yeah, I challenge you to create an anti-clutter force field in yr home to prevent it from getting in.

sarahell, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:37 (nine months ago) link

Oh well for sure it can't be 100% stopped, I understand that well having a 3yo and a 7yo. We have a policy of throwing away all goodie bag junk after they go to sleep for example.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:40 (nine months ago) link

there’s kind of a Say’s law to clutter imo; having a tiny apartment helps. people with houses seem to love filling them up with random crap. my sister has an entire room in her house that’s just ‘storage’ (enormous piles of junk)

flopson, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:43 (nine months ago) link

I have an anti-clutter forcefield. It was work though.

Yerac, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:44 (nine months ago) link

Plus it helps that my spouse was a techno hippie and he cleans his shit up like an adult.

Yerac, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:46 (nine months ago) link

having a tiny apartment helps. people with houses seem to love filling them up with random crap. my sister has an entire room in her house that’s just ‘storage’ (enormous piles of junk)

yeah!!! i remember when real estate ppl started selling the concept of the "bonus room" -- where the bonus room really was just a room to put piles of junk so the rest of the house could look fashionably tidy. otoh, I know plenty of people who live in small apartments that rent storage units.

sarahell, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:52 (nine months ago) link

Yeah was just talking about that with H -- we are a musician and artist and we always talk about wanting a house to have space for doing music and art. We just visited another musician/artist couple who had moved to a house with extra rooms, but they had managed to fill the extra rooms with crap and still not have space for music and art.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:53 (nine months ago) link

i just recently made more room in my apartment for music stuff -- such that, in theory, i could set up my drums in my living room -- which maybe i will do, however the downstairs neighbors would have an issue with me practicing them

sarahell, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:58 (nine months ago) link

Buy them earplugs

Trϵϵship, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:59 (nine months ago) link

But them in little gift baskets with a note on scented paper saying you’re going to be drumming now

Trϵϵship, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 17:59 (nine months ago) link

hahahah

sarahell, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 18:00 (nine months ago) link

everyone hates the drummer neighbour

flopson, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 18:09 (nine months ago) link

having a tiny apartment helps. people with houses seem to love filling them up with random crap. my sister has an entire room in her house that’s just ‘storage’ (enormous piles of junk)

a reason why I am not allowed to live in a house with a basement ever again

Jaq, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 19:41 (nine months ago) link

Our last place had a garage and my husband was mad the new place didn’t - but guess what we never parked the damn car in there we just filled it with junk. Not having a garage means we def have accumulated way less junk in the last 5 yrs than we did in 2-3 yrs in the old place.

just1n3, Wednesday, 23 January 2019 22:55 (nine months ago) link


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