DUDES: do you pee sitting down by default?

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Urban Dictionary seems to agree with you, but I must protest that "laying pipe" is a better metaphor for taking a shit than it is for fucking. I mean, logically.

many beartraps

― kenan, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:00 (seventeen years ago) link

boner peeing - tips plz?

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Never peed in a bottle, but I take every opportunity to pee outdoors even when not strictly necessary.

― milo z, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:01 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah i cut the top off a mountain dew bottle once and peed in it because the bathroom was like a million hours away

― river wolf, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:01 (seventeen years ago) link

Also:

why would you flush while you're still sitting down?!

SHAME

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:01 (seventeen years ago) link

jack off?

xxxpost

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:01 (seventeen years ago) link

bend forward but be careful not to pee in your gob

― félix pié, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:01 (seventeen years ago) link

i also i can guarantee i'm taller than you dude and i can still hit a urinal, wtf

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:01 (seventeen years ago) link

I think I got it confused with "Burying some cable".

― kenan, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:02 (seventeen years ago) link

haha how tall do you have to be to be too tall to piss in a urinal!?!?

xpost

― nickalicious, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:02 (seventeen years ago) link

seated peeing w/ boner == topologically impossible

if you actually care to get it in the toilet, i mean

― elmo argonaut, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:02 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah i cut the top off a mountain dew bottle once and peed in it because the bathroom was like a million hours away

you were a million miles from outside? or are you a pussy that doesn't pee outside?

― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:02 (seventeen years ago) link

alright wtf are you guys paranoid about yr scrotum or something??? ive never encountered any trouble with the babyknockers.

a little water will not destroy you.

& btw guys pretending that their flaccid dicks are so big they cant help but submerge into toiletwater - i laugh at you.

ok like a billion xps here i have vista alright go easy on me

― deeznuts, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:03 (seventeen years ago) link

boner peeing - tips plz?

-- Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Wednesday, April 18, 2007 4:00 PM (1 minute ago)

off your apt balcony

― modestmickey, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:03 (seventeen years ago) link

some guys i knew in high school made a car urinal, which was PVC pipe that you could take the top off of and pee in. it had tubing out the bottom, with a valve, so you could stick it out the window and drain it.

then, when they got to college, they sold it to some freshmen as a beer bong

― river wolf, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:03 (seventeen years ago) link

no, I've trained myself to not care as I ride the subway every day :(

what the hell do you wear to work??

― ghost rider, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:03 (seventeen years ago) link

I pee outside because no urinal can withstand my mighty spray

-- [url=[Removed Illegal Link] Bunyan, Wednesday, April, 2007 3:03 PM (5 seconds ago)

[hline]

LOL
xpost

― nickalicious, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

no i was outside, in a semi-crowded area, and there were cops. i'd tell you where but it's actually pretty embarassing

― river wolf, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

does anyone else get a weird feeling if they pee too quickly after ejaculating?

i call this "crossing the streams"

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

god damn you nu-ilx {RIP hline}

― nickalicious, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

another good reason for sitdown when boner peeing is u can read a non-porno mag about like iraq or something to get ur wang to go down

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

strongo, everyone, i think

― modestmickey, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

btw strongo as far as laying down the tp goes, i did that till i was 11 or so, after that i submit you are a total pussy if you do it

― deeznuts, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

DO THE MATH:

ERECT PENIS = PIPE

SEMI-SOLID TURD = CABLE

Also, WTF - when you have to pee w/ morning wood or whatever, just BACK UP, duh.

Fuck you jess for "crossing the streams"

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah peeing immediately after sex is srsly uncomfortable, it's really a "you shoulda thought of that before we left" situation

― ghost rider, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

deeznuts DOLLARSTORE!! re: tp

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

peeing through a boner is troublesome because not only does it make it hard to aim, but the urethra becomes narrower causing forceful spray effects

― elmo argonaut, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

WTF kind of boners do you guys have that you can tuck them into the bowl while sitting down without painful hurting?

― nickalicious, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

Don't answer that.

― nickalicious, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

http://entimg.msn.com/i/BillMurray/Ghostbusters_300x298.jpg

don't cross the streams, dave

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

peeing through a boner is troublesome because not only does it make it hard to aim, but the urethra becomes narrower causing forceful spray effects

-- elmo argonaut, Wednesday, April 18, 2007 4:06 PM (26 seconds ago)

otm cf austin powers 3

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

I am so hot right now.

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

I pee sitting down, I find it more comfortable and there's less chance of a missing the toilet.

― Tuomas, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

the boner tuck is just to get it down to 90 degree angle and hit the side wall of the inside rim instead of pissing up

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

I once wound up peeing in to an empty coffee cup while in the passenger seat of a car travelling down the Long Island Expressway. It was two in the morning and all of a sudden it was either that or wet myself, I had no other choice. Best part? I had perfect aim. Worst part? My newish boyfriend was the one driving. We were together for four years though so it couldn't have freaked him out that much.

― ENBB, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

boner = \ boner after looking at economist for 20 seconds = -

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

ghost rider & strongo otm re: postcoital urination

― max, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

otm re: crossing streams; brocaine makes this worse

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

Newish boyfriend = 4 years??!?!?

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

boner after reading ILE = /

― and what, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

maybe he was into it xpost to ENBB

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

WTF kind of boners do you guys have that you can tuck them into the bowl while sitting down without painful hurting?

It helps to lean forward.

― kenan, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

boner peeing - tips plz?

If it's a particularly tenacious turgidity, or if it's the middle of the night and I want to get it done and go back to bed I will just pee in the tub and run the shower to "flush." Started doing this about a couple years ago, and it's a brilliant solution!

― Jesse, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

WHA

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

lol

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

a friend of mine once had an apadravya and now can only pee sitting down

― elmo argonaut, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

it's always the bodily fluid threads

― strongohulkington, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

the boner tuck is just to get it down to 90 degree angle and hit the side wall of the inside rim instead of pissing up

-- and what, Wednesday, April 18, 2007 4:07 PM (1 minute ago)

this has to require a tiny dick

― modestmickey, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

I am the Ned of these sorts of threads.

― David R., Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

no you're a tiny dick

― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

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