an instant classic, as it were
― the late great, Saturday, 8 December 2018 19:52 (five years ago) link
Ted Cruz's First Fuckable Day
― The Greta Van Gerwig (C. Grisso/McCain), Saturday, 8 December 2018 22:35 (five years ago) link
Jesus, no
― flappy bird, Sunday, 9 December 2018 01:15 (five years ago) link
So he was totally fuckable before today, is what you're saying.
― vocabulary is just a way to sound samrter than you actually are (Old Lunch), Sunday, 9 December 2018 01:41 (five years ago) link
ted cruz is a straight hottie and all of you have known it since 1983 when risky business came out
― Trϵϵship, Sunday, 9 December 2018 01:44 (five years ago) link
fair point
― flappy bird, Sunday, 9 December 2018 04:20 (five years ago) link
http://robindescamp.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/Ted_Cruz_harmless_ducks.jpg
― vocabulary is just a way to sound samrter than you actually are (Old Lunch), Sunday, 9 December 2018 14:08 (five years ago) link
^do not heed if you rate me (wins) wrote this on thread so i was at dinner with a britisher. she ordered a prawn and rocket pizza. when it came, she put ketchup on it. I have pics on board I Love Everything on Jul 15, 2013
That salad is the sort of thing ppl sometimes do on come dine with me and they're really confident that it'll win them the competition, as theyre cooking they say to camera "I came up with it myself, the secret is to put pringles in the soup" and then later it cuts to one of the horrified guests going "it tasted a bit like he put...pringles...in the soup?"
Not entirely sure why, but it stays with me.
― anatol_merklich, Monday, 10 December 2018 12:03 (five years ago) link
Context:
guy right behind me (in a call centre, mind) comes in, sits at his desk at 8.59, waits for the first call of the day, inhales like he's about to cartoon blow the fuckin wall down and says EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYY-AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYY-AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, EEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYY-AWWWWWWWWWW until lunch time. he takes an hour off, bums round, whatever, sits back at desk, another huge breath in, fills the aul lungs up good, that phone rings, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYY-AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYY-AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, EEEEEEEEEEEEEYY-AWWWWWWWWWWWWW until 5pm, logs off, goes home, presumably to a fuckin stable i dunno― starfish entryprize (darraghmac), Tuesday, July 17, 2012 3:26 PM (six years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― starfish entryprize (darraghmac), Tuesday, July 17, 2012 3:26 PM (six years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
The post that actually haunts me:
haaaaaI solved it!We just got a call in from someone insisting on caint as gaeilge- it was transferred to this guy, and he speaks irish like a warrior poet, and QUIETLY― starfish entryprize (darraghmac), Wednesday, July 18, 2012 4:29 AM (six years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
I solved it!
We just got a call in from someone insisting on caint as gaeilge- it was transferred to this guy, and he speaks irish like a warrior poet, and QUIETLY
― starfish entryprize (darraghmac), Wednesday, July 18, 2012 4:29 AM (six years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― I have measured out my life in coffee shop loyalty cards (silby), Monday, 10 December 2018 17:52 (five years ago) link
god that fella turned out to have a tragic tale might write it out sometime
do we have a crazy coworkers you were afraid would stab you then you found out their story and you pitied them but were just as sure they would eventually stab you thread
― puppy bash (darraghmac), Monday, 10 December 2018 18:28 (five years ago) link
No but we definitely need that thread.
― vocabulary is just a way to sound samrter than you actually are (Old Lunch), Monday, 10 December 2018 18:32 (five years ago) link
the plot thickens
― I have measured out my life in coffee shop loyalty cards (silby), Monday, 10 December 2018 18:32 (five years ago) link
I had a very similar experience with a coworker I later found out was a Vietnam veteran
― rob, Monday, 10 December 2018 18:33 (five years ago) link
I worked with a guy recently who loathed me and I loathed him, an older guy, everybody nicknamed him *Blakey but I said he was more like **Nosferatu... only scarier. Anyway, I'm sure there's a tragic story behind him, he'd been demoted either because of drink or inability with new technology or both and people who knew him years ago said he was completely different and a pretty nice guy.
*from 'On the Buses'**not from 'On the Buses'
― Monica Kindle (Tom D.), Monday, 10 December 2018 18:36 (five years ago) link
Mind you, there are some people who stick up for him and who find him very helpful and pleasant - but they are all, without exception, attractive younger women.
― Monica Kindle (Tom D.), Monday, 10 December 2018 18:40 (five years ago) link
the bastard
― technically the international left but one (darraghmac), Monday, 10 December 2018 18:44 (five years ago) link
I imagine him assimilating them with a horrible gurgling drooling sound like something out of Burroughs.
― Monica Kindle (Tom D.), Monday, 10 December 2018 18:53 (five years ago) link
it was so iconic when lagoon posted
who da fuq is ross
― ||||||||, Thursday, 13 December 2018 19:50 (five years ago) link
Apparently you mistook Must-See TV for a suggestion.
― Home Despot (Old Lunch), Thursday, 13 December 2018 20:13 (five years ago) link
i smell a class action suit. what is monetary equivalent of several years worth of thursday nights from my youth that i can never get back?
― Karl Malone, Thursday, 13 December 2018 20:25 (five years ago) link
Hi, this is John Maus. Watch Qaddafi's death videos on Spotify.
― polyphonic, Friday, 21 October 2011 07:45 (seven years ago) Permalink
― ⅋ (crüt), Thursday, 14 February 2019 21:04 (five years ago) link
i'm not sure what klimt's the kiss is *actually* about, but it makes me feel sad because it vividly depicts to me a love and a tenderness that i have never found to exist in real life, and it saddens me that i haven't and also it saddens me that i have doubt that it exists at all.― gem (trisk), Monday, 6 September 2004 07:43 (fourteen years ago)
― Alba, Thursday, 14 February 2019 21:45 (five years ago) link
Really stupid mistakes are just Nature's way of creating everlasting remorse that will sink its barbs into your mind and fester there like gangrene for the rest of your life. That'll teach you.― Aimless (Aimless), Saturday, July 30, 2005 6:45 PM (thirteen years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
(On a modestmickey thread - unusually tactless for Aimless)
― Luna Schlosser, Friday, 1 March 2019 23:22 (five years ago) link
You never followed my distinguished career on Ask A Drunk.
― A is for (Aimless), Saturday, 2 March 2019 00:10 (five years ago) link
this post has been quoted and acknowledged elsewhere but I want to bring up again this excellent Fizzles post circa its 5.5 year anniversary
craftsmanship, consumerism, virtue, privilege, and quality
― moose; squirrel (silby), Tuesday, 12 March 2019 19:33 (five years ago) link
Best Buy 3 wrote this on thread Most despicable character on It's Always Sunny In Philly... on board I Love Everything on Jul 9, 2010It's an amazing show, and you can pick up both seasons for only $34.99. My name's Jason and I can help you with all your television comedy questions.
It's an amazing show, and you can pick up both seasons for only $34.99. My name's Jason and I can help you with all your television comedy questions.
― sarahell, Wednesday, 28 August 2019 18:42 (four years ago) link
So my kid's been sick with diarrhea for a while. Doctors don't really know what's wrong with him. They think he had a virus and his intestines aren't bouncing back quite like they should or something. He's been managing through life but just constantly has the shits. Anyhow, we brought home a collection kit from the doctor's yesterday and we collected a sample. Wife texts me from home just now and somehow they've misplaced it. Just a lonely little diarrhea sample lurking in our house somewhere.
― how's life, Wednesday, April 29, 2015 9:44 AM bookmarkflaglink
sooooo....didja wind up ever finding it? have this image of like, finding it 4 years later and there being rodents and flies everywhere.
― Jordan Pickford LOLverdrive (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 6 November 2019 22:18 (four years ago) link
I have no idea! oh dear god.
― ☮ (peace, man), Wednesday, 6 November 2019 22:29 (four years ago) link
We've discussed the theme song already:
Law and Order showLaw and Order show nowLaw and Order showOkay so first comes the law part,and then comes the order partFirst we'll arrest them andthen we'll indict them andthen ...
There is gonna be a twi - istAnd it'll blow your mind
Law and Order show ...
― nabisco, Friday, October 26, 2007 1:54 PM (twelve years ago) bookmarkflaglink
orrrder show
― lumen (esby), Friday, 15 November 2019 06:47 (four years ago) link
irl tee hee
― insecurity bear (sic), Friday, 15 November 2019 08:33 (four years ago) link
lol nabisco's law and order lyrics
― Peaceful Warrior I Poser (Karl Malone), Friday, 15 November 2019 17:19 (four years ago) link
Was Nabisco a script consultant on Netflix's Love?
― Alba, Friday, 15 November 2019 18:57 (four years ago) link
haaaaaI solved it!
― I have measured out my life in coffee shop loyalty cards (silby), Monday, December 10, 2018 9:52 AM (one year ago) bookmarkflaglink
― puppy bash (darraghmac), Monday, December 10, 2018 10:28 AM (one year ago)
ok darragh now this is the post that haunts my thoughts
― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Wednesday, 5 February 2020 21:44 (four years ago) link
ok ill get on it
― BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Wednesday, 5 February 2020 21:46 (four years ago) link
on 77
― BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Wednesday, 5 February 2020 22:33 (four years ago) link
!!
― Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Thursday, 6 February 2020 01:26 (four years ago) link
oh i meant at some stage
― BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Thursday, 6 February 2020 07:31 (four years ago) link
also why did you choose the phrase '30 packs'? i'm curious to what wheels turned when that 'fell out of your ass', also what wheels turned when you decided on the phrase 'falling out of your ass', also why you felt the need to deploy sexual imagery 3 times in your 'zinger' - "i need to know!" i'm also curious as to what drives you and morbius to continue posting here - i can't imagine it's 'i like the conversation' and god knows it's not 'i like the folx there and they like me' cuz i'd guess neither of you could find five threads either of you posted on more than four times that didn't eventually feature the majority of the posters on said thread calling you douchebags, i could be wrong i don't know. who do you like here? who likes you? name names - "i need to know!" i'm curious in what drives a man to post on a messageboard filled with people he doesn't like that like him even less. i don't think it's trolling but i can't figure out exactly what it is. not trying to 'zing' you here (i'd've accused you of shooting zesty ones out of your cock or buying 27 packs of stroh's or something - hit em up oops style), sincerely interested (perhaps, yes, if only to answer why do I continue posting here?). i'd ask others why they bother to engage morbius or oops but i've been there so i sorta understand the impulse.-- j blount (jamesbloun...) (webmail), November 12th, 2005 2:59 AM. (papa la bas) (link)
― ill fuckin put a paste on those (Neanderthal), Thursday, 6 February 2020 07:49 (four years ago) link
I regret the purchases that represented some other course my life didn't take. The 5-string bass guitar. The small PA and DJ lights. The ill fitting scuba gear. The coffee-table erotica. The roadside geology guides.
― Sanpaku, Tuesday, March 24, 2020 10:46 PM (twenty-seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink
no. not old, just planning ahead
― Webcam Du Bois (Hadrian VIII), Wednesday, 25 March 2020 03:18 (four years ago) link
"there goes max," they say, "the switzerland of blowjobs"
― max,Tuesday, 27 March 2007 23:13 (thirteen years ago) bookmarkflaglink
― ole uncle tiktok (darraghmac), Wednesday, 15 April 2020 05:01 (four years ago) link
u old
― Catsupppppppppppppp dude 茄蕃, Thursday, 23 August 2007 23:59 (thirteen years ago) link
u wait
― Pleasant Plains, Friday, 24 August 2007 00:00 (thirteen years ago) link
― Joey Corona (Euler), Wednesday, 26 August 2020 16:47 (three years ago) link
*clock strikes midnight*
― agent brodie canks (wins), Wednesday, 26 August 2020 17:47 (three years ago) link
where is jon when we need him
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Wednesday, 26 August 2020 18:08 (three years ago) link
if spurs end up with
lloriswalker kaboul vert baedembele sandro paulinholamela soldado chadli
plus some cash for the stadium, they should put up a statue of levy and baldini
― mizzell, Thursday, 1 August 2013 15:34 (seven years ago) bookmarkflaglink
― Marry and Neghim (darraghmac), Thursday, 11 March 2021 23:54 (three years ago) link
Hmm
― Mark G, Sunday, 16 May 2021 16:25 (two years ago) link
I'm not sure if it was an ILX post or not, maybe I'm hallucinating it bc I can't find it, but I thought j0rdan had some thoughts on how he couldn't stand to see people's thumbs in photos where they were holding something for the camera, and every time I'm about to post a photo somewhere online in which I'm holding something and my thumb is visible I'm reminded of it and weirded out by my own thumb. So I inevitably post photos where I'm holding something and it looks like it's just sort of floating in the air because I make sure my hand cannot be seen. If I'm holding it at the back and only my arm is visible, I don't even show the arm, because I don't want it to look like the post on a yard sign.
― omar little, Friday, 16 June 2023 00:01 (ten months ago) link
Tipsy Mothra's post immediately after the final episode of Mad Men where he figured out an ending that had been conceived four years earlier exactly.
― clemenza, Friday, 16 June 2023 00:37 (ten months ago) link
do we have a crazy coworkers you were afraid would stab you then you found out their story and you pitied them but were just as sure they would eventually stab you thread― puppy bash (darraghmac),
― puppy bash (darraghmac),
― dow, Friday, 16 June 2023 04:01 (ten months ago) link
not to harsh anyone's loogie but it's the impression that I get. Sorry, carry on.
― dow, Friday, 16 June 2023 04:04 (ten months ago) link
life is like that mannnnnn
― Ár an broc a mhic (darraghmac), Friday, 16 June 2023 09:24 (ten months ago) link