ILX Parenting 6: "Put Some Goddamn Pants On Before You Go Outside!" is a thing I say now

mine just ignores us when he feels like not answering which is infuriating

https://sickmouthy.wordpress.com/2018/11/29/a-pink-baby/

Scik, lovely photo and piece!

I hope this is a (gradual, to be sure) turn for the better.

<3

Question for parents of older kids: how (or do) you limit phone time? It's easy to knock them off wi-fi, but short of taking away the phone or other screen, how do you stop or slow them down when they're on the same unlimited data plan as you?

Should note this is not a terribly huge issue for us. But we have friends with boys that have had more trouble, particularly (sign of the times) when they just watch hours of Fortnite videos. Google I know offers a really good free family manager for Android phones, but my friends with iPhones are unclear where to turn. I guess most phone services have a sort of family manager service you can tack on for more $$?

The latest iOs has ScreenTime which let's you set all kinds of limits.

A parent at my school shared an app last year that you put on your phone and pair with your child's phone and you can control their access to everything: the internet, certain programs, and set specific times, ie that mom had set her children's phones not to access the internet at all during school hours (lol). Let me see if I can figure out what it was called.

Circle?

I'm late to the toothbrushing question, but there's a really cute audio show (podcast form, or if you have an Alexa you can ask it to play it for you) called Chompers. It's two minutes long, the narrator tells the kid when you switch quadrants, and then they share interesting facts or tell dumb jokes in between. It's good to keep Ivy focused while brushing, as she tends to get distracted pretty easily (or suddenly have something extremely important that she needs to tell me (spoiler alert: not important at all) that can't wait two minutes).

Also I think debating with an 8-year-old can lead only to madness, and actually it's pretty important for a kid that age to learn that no means no. Maybe think of it as setting boundaries.

ALSO I'm so happy and hopeful about Casper.

The Elmo brushing song has definitely helped...he holds the phone so it keeps his hands and face steady. Even better that the next one is Feist's "1, 2, 3, 4" which he absolutely loves. Crazy to think it wasn't originally written for Sesame Street

My very favorite of those real musicians doing songs on Sesame Street is Usher's ABC Song. I listen to that of my own free will when no children are in ear shot.

https://sickmouthy.wordpress.com/2019/01/05/christmas-with-childhood-cancer/

Here puberty is in full effect. Grades slipping. Compared to five yrs ago, I'm much much stricter. Turned into the bad cop. Heh.

my daughter (who is almost 2) had a seizure at day care and had to be given an ambulance ride to the hospital. getting a call in the middle of a workday from them saying "your daughter's not breathing, she's turning pale, we have an ambulance on the way" is not something I ever wanna live through again. thankfully it was just a reaction to a fever she had and apparently benign but holy hell is it scary - she had another one at home that night and it's freaky, they go stiff and pale and just sorta go unresponsive...it only lasts a minute but it feels so much longer. Mr Southall I can't even imagine what you're going through.

Yeah, those fever fits are horrible. My niece used to get them a lot when she was younger. Best wishes!

Bought my 4yo a helium balloon, he loved it
Was in the kitchen when I heard 'just going outside'
Approx 0.5 seconds later I heard this panicky shrieking 'It's gone up into the sky and it won't come back!!'

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(His dad thought I'd OK'd him going outside with it and had tied the balloon to his wrist and talked about how he mustn't let it go)
Teachable moment I guess
The sight of it rapidly disappearing over the rooftops was actually quite distressing tbf

at the dinner table

my 4yo: Daddy, raise your hand!!
*raises hand*
my 4yo: What you want?

lmao

^^^

lol

We've been through the mill, yeah, but it's chronic rather than acute, essentially; we've never had anything as heart-stoppingly awful as a febrile seizure sounds, never had a call saying "your baby isn't breathing". That sounds awful too.

Another blog post, cos its world cancer day, and tomorrow Casper turns 1: https://sickmouthy.wordpress.com/2019/02/04/world-cancer-day-caspers-birthday/

at least we made the infamous Sheboygan Scanner:

4217 kadlec dr - child not breathing

— Sheboygan Scanner (@sheboyganscan) January 21, 2019

child breathing, has better color, coming around

— Sheboygan Scanner (@sheboyganscan) January 21, 2019

50xx green meadow pl - 2yo girl had seizure

— Sheboygan Scanner (@sheboyganscan) January 22, 2019

really hope things remain "well"..."We also don’t know, for sure, how many more birthdays he will have" is a gut-wrenching sentence to read

Our friends have twins. One scored pretty low on her iq test. (Low 90s) The boy also has issues but they are stalling. (I get it: as soon as he has a "file" and/or "label", you end up in the system.) it's pretty sad to witness.

:(

This seems minor in the scheme of things, but I wish there was a way of banning all the blind-bagged collectable tiny plastic crap things marketed at kids now. Ooshies! Lol Surprise! Shitnuggets!

Cosign, and add to this Happy Meal toys, stocking stuffers, birthday-party goody bags, and everything to do with Valentine's Day.

Group crafts - even "upcycled" crafts - skate by with a warning, and a limit of four per year.

Sometimes it feels like the world is a giant hose aiming a stream of clutter at the house.

For reals. When I'm alone, I clean up. Otherwise there'd a shitpile.

:(

This seems minor in the scheme of things, but I wish there was a way of banning all the blind-bagged collectable tiny plastic crap things marketed at kids now. Ooshies! Lol Surprise! Shitnuggets!

― Mince Pramthwart (James Morrison), Saturday, February 9, 2019 8:21 AM (three hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

We definitely went through a big phase of buying blind-bags when my daughter was younger. But the problem was that she would want specific ones, so I'd have to keep going back to the comic store and risk that we would get the one we wanted and not one we already have. After so much frustration from getting duplicates we didn't want, I realized I could have just gone on ebay and bought ones that people had pre-opened for you. In general I think the practice is totally stupid, and suspect that it wires the brain for gambling.

By the way, now that I've got a 14-year-old, I have to deal with questions like:

"Can I go to a bonfire tonight?"
"No."
"Come on, my friend's 18-year-old brother (who we know) is going..."
"No. You were out until midnight last night, anyway. We want you in."
"Please?"
"Do we know whose house it's at?"
"No, it's in (a rural area about 15 miles away)."

Also, on the weekend of the snow storm last month, he asked to go snowboarding at a ski resort with his buddies. Just travel up there for the day and come back. His mother and I were seriously considering letting him go until we remembered about the impending storm. His response? "Well if it was snowing too hard, we could just stop and get a hotel!" Also, he called us up to ask this in the middle of one of our only big "date nights" of the year, which we had planned for months in advance.

Fun times!

Argh my oldest is menstruating. Halp. It's so weird: no longer a kid. 😭

Nath <3

Oh my god, if I thought The Little Mermaid was complicated to explain to my 4yo ('Is that Ariel or the naughty lady?' 'why does she want to pretend to be Ariel?' 'why does the naughty lady not want Ariel to sing?' etc etc) then I should NOT have put on 'The Princess and the Frog'.

Far too complicated! Although he legit spotted a loophole in the rules of the magic.

Xpost thanks. :-)

I wish there was a way of banning all the blind-bagged collectable tiny plastic crap things marketed at kids now. Ooshies! Lol Surprise! Shitnuggets!

LOL. I agree, however the mister buys that crap for *himself* so hes hardly a role model to his boys on that front har. We even had to buy all the fecking coles miniature groceries.

Which promptly got piled into a large jar and no one wants them anymore. Way to cut back on plastic, Coles!

Those Coles things are awful, and they're apparently about to do another lot, ffs

Vomit on the living room rug! Vomit on the kitchen floor! Vomit on the utility room! Vomit in her hair!

thanks for sharing your blog posts nick! (and good luck with the vomit!)

I would actually employ someone just to get the children from our front door and into the carseats and then back again when we come home.
I dream of just being able to get out of the car and walk off.

Nick S., I have to tell you that Ivy absolutely adores Casper from afar and regularly asks me if there are "any new pictures of that cute, cute baby" to look at.

I would actually employ someone just to get the children from our front door and into the carseats and then back again when we come home.

i had exactly this thought when we remembered a 10am doctor's appointment at 9:58am, my sister in law came round at exactly the right moment and managed to get her into her coat and shoes in 10 seconds, it would have taken me 10 minutes (or extreme bribery).

God, Ophelia confided her friend's mother hits her. There's also emotional abuse. Doesn't surprise me: she has an eating disorder and is an emotional wreck. I already told the head teacher about the eating disorder but I'm now thinking ab telling them ab the abuse. I feel so so sad for the kid. :-(

The worst I think: the mom told her she wishes she was never born.
For fuck's sake. It angers me so much. Who the fuck says that to their child?!?

omg that's awful. do you see the kid much?

That's so horrible, nath. I'm sorry.

I rarely see her. Ophelia went for a sleepover but the mom threw her out. I didn't realize till she knocked on the door at 10 to 10.

I decided Ophelia can't go anymore. I don't like a toxic environment. But the girl can come as much as she wants. Which she's doing now.

Contacted the headteacher. We're going to sit down and have a talk. I feel a little weird (invading the mom's privacy) but still good ab it too.

I think you’ve done exactly the right thing, Nath.

Seconded. Not an easy decision I imagine but definitely the right one.