Sounds like a double entendre but in reference to what precise filth act I couldn't say.
― Funkface LLC (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 August 2018 16:12 (five years ago) link
cool that we're shaming people that shave their partner's pubes and rubber cement them to their shaved legs itt now
― for i, sock in enumerate (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 10 August 2018 16:21 (five years ago) link
the staircase in my house is nice, hundred year old wood and I just saw a staircase in a movie and thought "hey, I should carpet my stairs"
― mh, Thursday, August 9, 2018 10:08 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
please don't!
― marcos, Friday, 10 August 2018 16:26 (five years ago) link
oh I'd never carpet my stairs
― mh, Friday, August 10, 2018 12:09 PM (sixteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
ok nevermind
TV version of Dostoevsky's Demons set in the present day and the characters are all podcasters
― soref, Tuesday, 14 August 2018 00:10 (five years ago) link
A parenting book aimed at women where the philosophy is liberate yourself by being more like a dad who doesn't give as much of a shit.
― Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Friday, 17 August 2018 03:03 (five years ago) link
Running a day to day Insta kinda like how highsnobriety or whoever follow around Kanye and asap and Beyonce and gossip and show off crazy outfits and what's happening on the current scene... but starting in about 1968 and following soul/funk/jazz stars and what crazy shit they wore and gossipy stories they went through and then how it turned into disco and hip-hop and lol who even are these wacky kids wtf is an afrika bambaataa Idk but it's the future and it's great
― plums (a hoy hoy), Sunday, 19 August 2018 12:06 (five years ago) link
Also word salad apologies
― plums (a hoy hoy), Sunday, 19 August 2018 12:07 (five years ago) link
"the ethical PUA"
― wayne trotsky (Simon H.), Sunday, 19 August 2018 12:47 (five years ago) link
Humans Who Might Unite Tonitedon’t know, but woke up with these words on the brain, running on a cycle
― Karl Malone, Sunday, 19 August 2018 14:58 (five years ago) link
A winebar called Wine Eleven
― Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Monday, 20 August 2018 17:12 (five years ago) link
In partnership with Oscar Mayer, La Croix is proud to introduce Deli Water, a new line of lunchmeat-flavored sparkling beverages.
(NB, this may entail nothing more than dropping, say, a slice of olive loaf in a can of otherwise-unflavored carbonated water.)
― Bruise Harmsby and the Rage (Old Lunch), Monday, 20 August 2018 17:25 (five years ago) link
flavored? surely you mean lunchmeat-essenced
― the late great, Monday, 20 August 2018 18:41 (five years ago) link
I deeply apologize to the good people at La Croix for mischaracterizing their patented method of merely hinting at the possible existence of flavor without ever quite crossing so crude and unseemly a line.
― Bruise Harmsby and the Rage (Old Lunch), Monday, 20 August 2018 19:00 (five years ago) link
http://dailyhive.com/vancouver/vancouver-hot-dog-water-june-2018
― Hans Holbein (Chinchilla Volapük), Monday, 20 August 2018 20:28 (five years ago) link
I somehow knew it was just terrible enough to have already been done irl.
― Bruise Harmsby and the Rage (Old Lunch), Monday, 20 August 2018 22:39 (five years ago) link
just saw a Chopped where they had to use jerky soda
― Runcibly spooning (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 22 August 2018 00:27 (five years ago) link
I'd be headed for that ice cream machine
― for i, sock in enumerate (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 22 August 2018 02:00 (five years ago) link
a lighthearted, Ocean's Eleven-esque heist movie about the 9/11 conspirators
― .oO (silby), Thursday, December 28, 2017 11:15 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
don't do that to me right before bed. I can already see the split screen star wipes on the security videos, a box cutter wobbling down a walmart conveyor belt...
― pplains, Thursday, December 28, 2017 11:32 PM
The meta-terrible idea is this is the designated bomb in an updated version of The Producers
― .oO (silby), Friday, December 29, 2017 12:13 AM
pilot lesson montage to that music, too
― mh, Friday, December 29, 2017 10:07 AM
I am a horrible human being. Just warning you all.
― pplains, Thursday, 30 August 2018 13:35 (five years ago) link
(Please hit play)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4v8YQ6sU6I4
It was a mission that couldn't fail – what could go wrong?
SCENE: CAVE - INTERIOR
KHALIDSo we'll need two planes to fly into each building...
OSAMANo, no. Just one. You fly into the north tower, from the north, right? And it shall knock over into the south tower. Like dominoes. (Slaps hands together.) One bird, two stones, you see?
KHALIDBut let me just offer that... yes... won't the plane just shoot through the building? I mean, the towers were basically constructed as skeletons held up by a steel core...
OSAMA(Angrily) And then what? What do you think happens next? Mr. Architect? Jet fuel can't melt steel beams!
All it would take... would be a little teamwork...
SCENE: AIRPLANE HANGER - INTERIORTHE HIJACKERS have JARRAH cornered by the coffee machine
JARRAHHey guys. Uh. What, what's going on?
ATTAJust wondering, Jarrah, how, you know, exactly how you plan to handle your mission if the passengers push back. (Looks back at crew behind him and chuckles.) I mean, we've seen your training today, you seem a little soft in this area.
JARRAHI am not soft! I know exactly what I will do! I am fully trained in this department! I will simply get on the intercom and say (in generic American pilot's accent) "This is your captain speaking. We are going back to the airport." And then, THEN everyone will settle down!
ATTA and OTHER HIJACKERS just stare at JARRAH with arms folded. Some begin chuckling as well.
JARRAHSounds OK, right?
QUICK ZOOM-IN and QUICK ZOOM-OUT to JARRAH in COCKPIT - INTERIOR. CAMERA rotates in steady 360º. Headset around JARRAH's neck. Sandwiches and ginger ale cans bouncing around. THE PASSENGERS are pummeling him in the head with their fists.
JARRAHNOOOOOOOO!
Teamwork... and a lot of planning
SCENE: HAMBURG STREET CAFE - EXTERIOR. KHALID and ATTA sit at a small cast-iron table, drinking espressos.
KHALIDSo the boss is pretty serious about this. Says you will take out the towers and al-Shehhi gets the Empire State.
ATTA(Nearly spits out espresso.) Take out the towers? You mean both of them? I'm a pilot, not a professional bowler, Khalid! (laughs at own joke.)
KHALIDYou listen closely, ok? This doesn't come from me. (Strokes imaginary beard.) This comes from above. You hit the towers. Al-Shehhi plays King Kong. You got this? Or... do we need to find someone else who can handle the job?
ATTA(Sighs heavily. Looks at German sports car parked on street playing "Bingo Bango" by Basement Jaxx.) No. Tell the boss I got this.
It was a plan that the whole world would ... never forget.
SCENE: AIRPLANE HANGER - INTERIORATTA is addressing THE HIJACKERS
ATTASo it'll be me and my crew first with the towers. Al-Shehhi and his boys come in after me with the Empire State. Jarrah's got the Capitol covered. We're all set, so let's begin discussing how the plane tickets on–
HANJOURExcuse me!
ATTAYes, what is it, Hanjour -- oh, crap. I forgot again, didn't I?
(HIJACKERS all begin chuckling a little.)
HANJOUR(Angrily) You always forget! If anything, me and my crew will be hitting the most important target!
ATTAAh yes, yes. Of course. Hey, everyone, let's all not forget that Hanjour and his crew will be taking on the Pentagon. (Starts to giggle) Hope you know how to fly a hologram, Hanjour.
(HIJACKERS all start cracking up.)
HANJOUR(Angry, pointing at everyone.) Shut up! Shut up! You know that joke isn't funny!
This summer, get ready for 'The Lollipop Branch' - a gang of misfits who don't know how to come down!
SCENE: WALMART CHECKOUT LANE - INTERIORCAMERA POV - LOOKING UP FROM CONVEYOR BELT
AL-SHEHHI picks up box cutter from belt and touches tip of blade
AL-SHEHHIYou see this?
ATTA(Confused, slightly impatient) Yeah?
AL-SHEHHI100% stainless steel.
ATTA waits a beat before chuckling and laughing, shakes head to himself.
ATTAYou, such the comedian. C'mon, let's roll.
This film has not yet been rated.
Bravo
― faculty w1fe (silby), Thursday, 30 August 2018 15:39 (five years ago) link
Terrible business idea #342: a sofa slipcover print entirely made up of realistic pictures of TV remote controls.
― Moves like Javert (Ye Mad Puffin), Monday, 3 September 2018 00:12 (five years ago) link
Ow ow ow
― faculty w1fe (silby), Monday, 3 September 2018 00:21 (five years ago) link
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DlZJbprXgAMJJSy.jpg
― still wackford after all these squeers (DJ Mencap), Monday, 3 September 2018 13:42 (five years ago) link
Can I have a cup of water?No, sorry, I'm out of cups. Sorry....What?
― Digital Squirts (Old Lunch), Monday, 3 September 2018 13:55 (five years ago) link
I really like a lot of these terrible ideas.
― Yerac, Monday, 3 September 2018 14:32 (five years ago) link
Terrible is the coward’s awesome
― Perverse Mortgage (latebloomer), Wednesday, 5 September 2018 04:44 (five years ago) link
I've recently gotten into the habit of singing these really terrible, upbeat rearrangements of intensely-depressing songs (this morning featured a real swingy version of Bonnie Prince Billy's 'I See a Darkness' which was reminiscent of Bobby Darin's 'Mack the Knife' and Alan Parsons Project's 'Time' in the style of the Trashmen). So an album full of those is my terrible idea of the day.
― Digital Squirts (Old Lunch), Thursday, 6 September 2018 11:56 (five years ago) link
Or, rather, the first of what I'm sure will be many terrible ideas generated by my brain today.
― Digital Squirts (Old Lunch), Thursday, 6 September 2018 11:57 (five years ago) link
I am going to make myself a nice jalapeño full of cappuccino at my break today and will report back.
― mick signals, Thursday, 6 September 2018 13:12 (five years ago) link
xpost
that's like the opposite of the person with acoustic guitar singing slow folky renditions of pop songs trope. it could be a hit!
― Karl Malone, Thursday, 6 September 2018 14:41 (five years ago) link
how is that pepper-cup idea not from viz
― bitch that’s the tubby custard machine (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 6 September 2018 14:44 (five years ago) link
Looking up threads that I posted in my early 20s. Reading anything I wrote in my early 20s. Remembering anything from my early 20s.
― latebloomer, Friday, 7 September 2018 14:00 (five years ago) link
Oh definitely. Revisiting anything from one’s past is generally a nightmare
― Karl Malone, Friday, 7 September 2018 15:07 (five years ago) link
Reporting back: my pepper leaked.
― mick signals, Friday, 7 September 2018 15:14 (five years ago) link
swap men’s rooms with women’s rooms at unpredictable intervals to keep everyone on their toes
― faculty w1fe (silby), Monday, 10 September 2018 20:46 (five years ago) link
GWAR on Drugs -- a War on Drug cover band that wears GWAR costumes.
― Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Tuesday, 11 September 2018 17:32 (five years ago) link
*War on Drugs cover band
GWAR on Drukqs
― koogs, Tuesday, 11 September 2018 18:00 (five years ago) link
a nice jalapeño full of cappuccino is fun to say out loud
― Paleo Weltschmerz (El Tomboto), Tuesday, 11 September 2018 21:08 (five years ago) link
hell of a pain though
― mick signals, Tuesday, 11 September 2018 21:30 (five years ago) link
chili rellenope
― for i, sock in enumerate (Sufjan Grafton), Tuesday, 11 September 2018 21:38 (five years ago) link
YTI: achieve a stratospherically successful career as a rapper under the name gnirutaeF.
Then I could guest on other artists' singles, and it would say "Featuring gnirutaeF."
― Never mind the bollards (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 12 September 2018 02:22 (five years ago) link
Tofurken: a chicken inside a tofurkey
― Never mind the bollards (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 12 September 2018 02:27 (five years ago) link
aka Buddha’s Dismay
― Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Wednesday, 12 September 2018 13:39 (five years ago) link
a bit of viral marketing for Zip Recruiter -- The Zipruiter Film. It's the Zapruder Film overlaid with select Zip Recruiter marketing language about "always getting the right person" etc.
― for i, sock in enumerate (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 12 September 2018 22:54 (five years ago) link
omg
― got the scuba tube blowin' like a snork (Doctor Casino), Thursday, 13 September 2018 01:38 (five years ago) link
I'm not trying to demonize these particular secret service members, but perhaps the fit just wasn't good. maybe the U.S. government had been searching for a long time and eventually settled for some unqualified candidates? Of course, there are many terrible directions one could take this thing.
― for i, sock in enumerate (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 13 September 2018 16:45 (five years ago) link
― for i, sock in enumerate (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, September 12, 2018 5:54 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
Sometimes you need a candidate who sticks out from the crowd. You don’t have time for a scattershot approach. At Zip Recruiter, we give you the tools you need to be right on target in your search.
― Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Thursday, 13 September 2018 16:48 (five years ago) link
Zip Recruiter. For when you need to get a head.
Zip Recruiter. The brainy choice.
― Never mind the bollards (Ye Mad Puffin), Thursday, 13 September 2018 16:52 (five years ago) link