I hear the LOLs echoing tonight but she hears only ROFLs of some quiet EXCELSIOR

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Barney Tapin also demurs when his genius is feted iirc.

Caddyshack III: Back to the Shack! (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:06 (eleven months ago) link

Fgti pls stop making pronouncements on heterosexuamity, yr um not exactly doing well

― albvivertine, Monday, August 6, 2018 11:52 PM (two days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Like next up are you going to point out chicks have boobs

― albvivertine, Monday, August 6, 2018 11:54 PM (two days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The fuck is wrong with you albvivertine

― flamboyant goon tie included, Tuesday, August 7, 2018 9:03 AM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I like yr posts on music a lot, but srsly did you think it'd be news to straight men that women dig penetration and we shouldn't coerce them into letting us fuck them? Last I checked the average male ilxor was closer to 40 than 14.

― albvivertine, Tuesday, August 7, 2018 8:44 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dang everybody look out, this guy know a lot about sex - real heterosexuamity "sexpert" if i might use the term

― challops trap house (Will M.), Wednesday, August 8, 2018 10:53 AM (eleven minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Eliza D., Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:07 (eleven months ago) link

oh now i get snubbed omg

dele alli my bookmarks (darraghmac), Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:10 (eleven months ago) link

good god this thread

rip van wanko, Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:19 (eleven months ago) link

can we get a mulligan on this one pls

a space stewardess (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:27 (eleven months ago) link

inb4 careymulligan.jpg

a space stewardess (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:27 (eleven months ago) link

https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1180842262l/1083016.jpg

Eliza D., Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:33 (eleven months ago) link

few steamers shovelled into this thread fer sure

dele alli my bookmarks (darraghmac), Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:34 (eleven months ago) link

that's more like it

a space stewardess (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 8 August 2018 15:35 (eleven months ago) link

Stately plump buck mulligan imo

Neuer write off the germans (Bananaman Begins), Wednesday, 8 August 2018 17:05 (eleven months ago) link

https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1348671003l/1121670.jpg

jeremy cmbyn (wins), Wednesday, 8 August 2018 17:06 (eleven months ago) link

Frederik bringing all the us politics ppl to the yard is quite something.

― lbi's life of limitless european glamour (Le Bateau Ivre), Tuesday, August 14, 2018 12:17 PM (twelve minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

and they're like, I'm smarter than y'all

― aloha darkness my old friend (katherine), Tuesday, August 14, 2018 12:19 PM (eleven minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The Desus & Mero Chain (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, 14 August 2018 17:30 (eleven months ago) link

three weeks pass...

I fucking hate all of you

― Paleo Weltschmerz (El Tomboto), Wednesday, September 5, 2018 11:44 AM (twenty-one minutes ago)

typical Aries

― sarahell, Wednesday, September 5, 2018 2:06 PM (thirty-seven minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The Desus & Mero Chain (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Wednesday, 5 September 2018 19:45 (ten months ago) link

two weeks pass...

Cheers, apparently unmarried mom with a baby Bjorn drinking rose

― calstars, Saturday, September 22, 2018 9:24 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

How do you know her baby is named Bjorn?

― Yerac, Saturday, September 22, 2018 9:26 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Bjorn babies have a look

― F# A# (∞), Saturday, September 22, 2018 9:50 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

they're bjorn with it

― weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Saturday, September 22, 2018 9:59 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

macropuente (map), Sunday, 23 September 2018 02:35 (nine months ago) link

hahahahaha

crüt, Sunday, 23 September 2018 03:55 (nine months ago) link

Or mjaybe it’s mjaybeline

Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Sunday, 23 September 2018 13:34 (nine months ago) link

Crinj

Mark G, Monday, 24 September 2018 06:16 (nine months ago) link

:/

imago, Monday, 24 September 2018 18:47 (nine months ago) link

"apparently unmarried mom"

for i, sock in enumerate (Sufjan Grafton), Monday, 24 September 2018 19:58 (nine months ago) link

laugh a little, what are you a borg?

rip van wanko, Monday, 24 September 2018 20:09 (nine months ago) link

ljaybelline

sarahell, Monday, 24 September 2018 20:22 (nine months ago) link

xp can any among us name a single guy named Cody who is not a complete oxygen thief?

― suzy, Monday, September 24, 2018 1:10 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'd say Cody from popular science YouTube channel Cody's Lab but he's constantly combusting things so

― imago, Monday, September 24, 2018 1:12 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

how's life, Tuesday, 25 September 2018 13:41 (nine months ago) link

Probably the most unfunniest thing this year

F# A# (∞), Tuesday, 25 September 2018 17:21 (nine months ago) link

LOL hueg

rip van wanko, Tuesday, 25 September 2018 19:21 (nine months ago) link

I’m volunteering at a Hokkaido potato and pumpkin farm and gloriously out of touch with everything. I’m starting to think that the pumpkin farming lifestyle may be what I need, maybe Sake brewing in the off season.

― American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Monday, October 1, 2018 5:42 AM (five hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

wise course of action ed

you have to get to the roots and squash them. cant let it ferment.

― Dmac TT (darraghmac), Monday, October 1, 2018 6:46 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if you brewed some you could call it ff sake

― estela, Monday, October 1, 2018 11:22 AM (fifteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lbi's life of limitless european glamour (Le Bateau Ivre), Monday, 1 October 2018 09:39 (nine months ago) link

what is the proper reading of that joke? in my mind, estela already has the phrase "for fuck's sake" going thru her mind after reading about harvesting pumpkins on Hokkaido, but before even arriving at the word "Sake"

rip van wanko, Monday, 1 October 2018 17:14 (nine months ago) link

in Hokkaido not on

rip van wanko, Monday, 1 October 2018 17:15 (nine months ago) link

has estela zung ed before

imago, Monday, 1 October 2018 17:16 (nine months ago) link

i think it should be read as a play on words with eds situation and a comment on my punning

Dmac TT (darraghmac), Monday, 1 October 2018 18:03 (nine months ago) link

we're explaining lols in the excelsior thread now!? gtfo

lbi's life of limitless european glamour (Le Bateau Ivre), Monday, 1 October 2018 18:12 (nine months ago) link

It only doesn't work if you have to read it out loud.

Mark G, Monday, 1 October 2018 21:43 (nine months ago) link

It's like "give us this day our daily pain."

Lots of puns really only work when read.

Dancing with the Tsars (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 2 October 2018 00:53 (nine months ago) link

allowed

Dmac TT (darraghmac), Tuesday, 2 October 2018 01:00 (nine months ago) link

and THEN everyone’s like “wait a second, we make enough food to feed everyone in the world, there’s no reason for anyone to go hungry. it’s a distribution issue - and we can fix it.

― Karl Malone, Tuesday, October 2, 2018 2:56 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

we could poll alternate universes to see which one most ilxors would prefer to live in

― A is for (Aimless), Tuesday, October 2, 2018 3:16 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This exact universe but I have a nice peppermill

― I have measured out my life in coffee shop loyalty cards (silby), Tuesday, October 2, 2018 3:18 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that's this universe if you just go to the store and buy a nice peppermill

― j., Tuesday, October 2, 2018 3:35 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

we have enough nice peppermills to give to everyone; it's just a distribution issue

― crüt, Tuesday, October 2, 2018 3:42 AM (fifty-three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

macropuente (map), Tuesday, 2 October 2018 03:37 (nine months ago) link

lol

flopson, Tuesday, 2 October 2018 03:44 (nine months ago) link

prefer Oval in CD skippy mode. Prefer Voigt in high tension mode (ie Freiland Klaviermusik) or as Mike Ink, though I used to listen to Gas a lot when I couldn't sleep.

― Paul Ponzi, Tuesday, October 2, 2018 2:34 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

so did yr roommates apparently

― fuck the NRA (Neanderthal), Tuesday, October 2, 2018 2:35 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Plinka Trinka Banga Tink (Eliza D.), Wednesday, 3 October 2018 13:25 (nine months ago) link

so, is Neanderthal pointing out that Paul was inconsiderate of his roommates by playing music in the middle of the night, or that Paul is flatulent?

rip van wanko, Wednesday, 3 October 2018 14:19 (nine months ago) link

Just a couple of sixteen year olds joking about flatulance on the excelsior thread.

Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Wednesday, 3 October 2018 14:25 (nine months ago) link

It will be a cold day in hell before I'm not amused by a well-timed fart joke.

Plinka Trinka Banga Tink (Eliza D.), Wednesday, 3 October 2018 17:10 (nine months ago) link

Even then, it will warm u.

Mark G, Wednesday, 3 October 2018 19:12 (nine months ago) link

•In every suburban dad 1983-1989

― Werther Down the Spiral (Old Lunch), Tuesday, October 9, 2018 5:20 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

https://i.imgur.com/1JFht1R.jpg

― rip van wanko, Tuesday, October 9, 2018 5:26 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

macropuente (map), Wednesday, 10 October 2018 04:20 (nine months ago) link

three weeks pass...

use case

https://i.imgur.com/LZmapQt.jpg

― Karl Malone, Tuesday, October 30, 2018 7:57 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

for the suicide-curious digital artist in all of us

― la bébé du nom-nom (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, October 30, 2018 8:44 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

macropuente (map), Wednesday, 31 October 2018 16:19 (eight months ago) link

From the irrationally embarrassed thread.

When there were station wagons with rear-facing back seats, I dreaded getting stuck at a red light behind one with kids in the back staring at me. I suddenly find something very interesting on the dashboard to keep me from making eye contact.

Except one time when there were 2 brothers watching me while I stared slightly to the left pretending not to notice them. Brother #1 turned his head but #2 was still looking at me, so I grabbed a pen out of my pocket, stuck it in my nose and let it hang there. As he smacked his brother's arm to get him to turn and look, I yanked the pen out and went back to staring disinterestedly off to the left.

― Hideous Lump, Tuesday, October 30, 2018 8:22 PM

nickn, Wednesday, 31 October 2018 16:51 (eight months ago) link

Glenn Kenny: no masterpiece, but a staggering "vehicle for self-loathing"

https://www.rogerebert.com/festivals-and-awards/venice-film-festival-2018-a-star-is-born-the-other-side-of-the-wind

― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Saturday, September 1, 2018 5:33 PM (two months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

no masterpiece, but a staggering "vehicle for self-loathing"

my new tinder bio

― princess of hell (BradNelson), Saturday, September 1, 2018 6:10 PM (two months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

macropuente (map), Friday, 2 November 2018 19:39 (eight months ago) link

from abysmal real names:

Buffy Wicks
Jovanka Beckles

― DEATH PUPPET (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, November 3, 2018 8:01 PM (three days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

AND THEY HATE EACH OTHER

― Scam jam, thank you ma’am (Sparkle Motion), Sunday, November 4, 2018 1:27 AM (two days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

macropuente (map), Tuesday, 6 November 2018 23:39 (eight months ago) link

Unless sanders takes a dive cognitively I see no reason why he couldn’t run; that said there are other people. I’m down for Harris, certainly.

― akm, Wednesday, November 7, 2018 1:56 PM (twenty-four minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hey if there's another candidate who's expressed a desire to build a robust international left to combat incipient fascism abroad I'm all for 'em

― wayne trotsky (Simon H.), Wednesday, November 7, 2018 1:58 PM (twenty-two minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

stalin

― unproven (darraghmac), Wednesday, November 7, 2018 1:59 PM (twenty-one minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

he is dead dmac

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, November 7, 2018 2:02 PM (eighteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

no barrier to election in states iirc

― unproven (darraghmac), Wednesday, November 7, 2018 2:05 PM (fifteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I have measured out my life in coffee shop loyalty cards (silby), Wednesday, 7 November 2018 22:21 (eight months ago) link

xp - Wicks won btw

sarahell, Wednesday, 7 November 2018 23:06 (eight months ago) link

No results found for "buffy the beckles slayer".

rip van wanko, Wednesday, 7 November 2018 23:15 (eight months ago) link

I was in a pool in Palm Springs during the 2010 Easter earthquake. the wrongfooted feeling and the water splashes out of the pool were alarming

― Dan S, Saturday, July 6, 2019 6:33 PM

if there are any Oklahoma tornado survivors reading this thread, they're gonna think you're the biggest asshole in the world. "I can relate to your splashy terror, because I once watched my patio furniture decapitate my dog in the sky."

― del griffith, Saturday, July 6, 2019 6:40 PM

pplains, Sunday, 7 July 2019 01:00 (one week ago) link

omg

imago, Sunday, 7 July 2019 01:44 (one week ago) link

I assumed it was his but I suppose it could have been somebody else's. You don't know , man. You're not in Wales.

― Elitist cheese photos (aldo), Thursday, July 11, 2019 8:23 AM (three hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

mookieproof, Thursday, 11 July 2019 16:02 (one week ago) link

This guy has never had an ounce of talent. When I was at my indiest moment of early-90s moviegoing, I still thought Clerks was trash.

― Mazzy Tsar (PBKR), Friday, 12 July 2019 22:24 (forty-eight minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

Sheesh, sounds like someone snoochied on the wrong side of the boochie this morning.

― Logy Psycho (Old Lunch), Friday, 12 July 2019 22:37 (thirty-five minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

phil neville jacket (darraghmac), Friday, 12 July 2019 23:16 (one week ago) link

actual lol

☮ (peace, man), Saturday, 13 July 2019 00:30 (one week ago) link

actual lol here too

kinder, Saturday, 13 July 2019 11:38 (one week ago) link

nice

Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 14 July 2019 04:13 (six days ago) link


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