star wars 9 grim resignation thread

I'm just a sap who likes everyone having happy endings and whatnot at the end of ROTJ

― Chuck_Tatum, Tuesday, July 10, 2018 8:15 AM (fifty-seven minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol my advice is to just enjoy that final shot of all the characters together like the big happy family that they are. everyone ends up dying alone and apart from one another.

funny, there are several reunion shots where old characters are introduced to old spaceships or old robots and these moments are milked for nostalgia, but nobody thought of getting the gang of human actors back together.

im not a hater, i actually enjoyed the film when i saw it. but pressured into thinking it's a genius work of art i disagree and i guess that makes me a hater.

i just don't think it's an amazing work of film, just like most of the other ones. it's funny how you could trash the prequels and nobody called you a hater. that's part of the fun of watching dumb space movies. apparently it's serious shit now.

xp ...apart from the scenes where they do.

this movie is going to end with most of the galaxy being blown up and 3 of our heroes getting in an escape POD and heading to a new galaxy and landing on this weird blue planet called EARTH

That seems pretty likely.

I'm the man out there pressuring individuals into believing star wars movies are genius works of art

u monster

my friend who does Star Wars cosplay (mostly as Kylo Ren) went to Disney as Rose (wearing a similar pendant) and got harassed by a busboy who proceeded to accost her and tell her how terrible a character she was for about 15 minutes while she was trying to get food.

I kinda hate this fanbase.

(natch they reported him)

should have told him he was doing a horrible job playing a Disney employee and they can people for that

i find it pretty weird that the twitter/tumblr/online press zeitgeist opinion seems to be that The Last Jedi WAS A TOTAL ERROR OMG DISASTER HOLY SHIT THEY WRECKED STAR WARS

whereas my experience seeing it and chatting to normal real life people afterwards was that despite a few shitty bits, everyone had a lovely time and it went down really damn well.

people on the internet convinced of the importance of their own opinions can't allow themselves to not tear every single thing apart i guess?

^
(old man shouting at "the cloud")

this whole revival is an exercise in pandering and condescension (I say this as someone who mostly likes the new movies) and people, as a rule, unconsciously despise being pandered to.

Last Jedi was pretty great imo. I think it's the least pander-y of the bunch.

really excited for this

oh wait sorry thought this was the RIP Donald Trump thread

the films are very skillfully made with some awe-inspiring moments...i think they fall short in certain areas, mostly in their stabs at terrible meta humor that are mostly completely out of character for those who deliver the lines.

Agreed, I don't think they benefit from any kind of self-awareness

Shdn't grim resignation be the title of uk politics thread lol

Actually, I haven't seen any of the new ones yet. Should I?

The Last Jedi was the first new one I've seen since Caravan Of Courage was in the cinema, and I enjoyed it OK

the last jedi > attack of the clones > revenge of the sith > rogue one > the phantom menace > the force awakens

Attack of the Clones should always bring up the rear

McGregor brings up the rear of that alien-cook's trousers in the diner scene

the last jedi > attack of the clones > revenge of the sith > rogue one > the phantom menace > the force awakens

― difficult listening hour, Tuesday, July 10, 2018 9:43 AM (three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh wow i am so into this ranking

nobody thought of getting the gang of human actors back together

wha? that’s fucking nuts

rewatched all the prequels this last few weeks as the girlfriend hadn't seen them. They're all actually worse than I remember. stories and scripts are mindboggling awful from start to finish and anyone thinking the new films are somehow worse than them is crazy.

Clones at least is somewhat entertaining during the assassination sequence and then, yeah.

Phantom Menace was godawful, I watched that one for the first time since 1999.

I still kinda like RotS, warts and all.

the part where Anakin gets the "it's only a fleshwound!" treatment is v funny

guys let's just do a "the prequels are: good or bad" poll and everyone who votes for the losing option gets permabanned

polls are anonymous to protect those of us who keep voting for a certain indiana jones/crystal skull movie as the best spielberg work

The Last Jedi > The Force Awakens >> Rogue One >> root canal >>>>> the prequels

seriously tho, the three old leads aren't in *any* scenes together?

not a one in TFA

well, I guess Han Solo/Chewbacca counts, although in the last couple released films, Mayhem is no longer in the costume

petition for a spin-off starring Dean Winters as Chewbacca with the wookiee head taken off

how the fuck did I type that instead of Mayhew

Peter Mayhew. sheesh. sic, you should have caught that

oh wait, the insurance commercial character is Mr. Mayhem and I was properly clowned

never mind

... did you take a piss all the way through the Han / Leia scene?

I was doing my hair

YOU GUYS.

https://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--EQl3mdZQ--/c_scale,f_auto,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/ybsmpyjtqyzixdtjhg12.jpg

http://tse2.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.a-aCdAU5cK_Jy9dSXOsaAgEsCo

https://www.starwarsnewsnet.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/Billie-Lourd.png

this is where I admit that I took "the three old leads aren't in *any* scenes together?" to mean all three of them in the same scene and then appended han-chewie as an additional combo outside of the han-leia and luke-leia duos

but then decided it'd be funnier if I pretended the only two to ever appear together were han and chewie

chewie did not, in fact, do something different with his hair

ok fine i'll see the damn films

I'm the man out there pressuring individuals into believing star wars movies are genius works of art

― mh

"the last jedi" showed up on netflix. i don't have netflix but the place where i get my tms has netflix and i got tired of watching nature documentaries after five weeks (yes i understand now what polar bears look like and your narrator script is terrible) so i'm watching it again, this time in 2d. it really is a wonderfully put together movie, "genius work of art" i wouldn't say but it's fantastically subversive, kind of like moffat's doctor who except it's entertaining in addition to being clever. my drunk ass is wondering how much of the backlash is just a backlash against people being clever, which if you don't like cleverness fuck you you are sentenced to watching all of the "nick and nora" movies until you stop perceiving this as a "sentence".

seriously today i was watching the scene transition where they went from a zoom from water dripping on kylo ren's hand to a spaceship, if you'd rather see another fucking wipe fuck you you are sentenced to watching "radar men from the moon" until you _do_ perceive this as being a sentence

I was being sarcastic because they’re workmanlike family space dramas

steve yedlin pretty solid cinematographer though and when they ramp up all the practical+digital visual effects and great foley artists even scenes that drag seem like they could be real

also re: clever, I kind of hated them when I realized in the intro he is saying “holding for general HUGS” but now I kind of chuckle and mumble “general hugs”

idk, i've seen enough mediocre and bad films that i have a hard time describing any of the star wars films, even the awful ones, as "workmanlike"

and yeah, starting the movie with one of the main characters making a stupid prank phone call to a captain of a star destroyer is idiotic enough to be entertaining. there's a fine line, i've been told, between clever and stupid, and "the last jedi" for the most part straddles it expertly

buddy “workmanlike” in my book means they have a work ethic, actual normal level of skills (they’re probably union), and they’re able to hack it

I mean, if you go by strict definitions a lot of Ron Howard work is hack work — they give a director with the right skills a direction and a script and he churns out usable product. It doesn’t mean it’s bad in quality necessarily. imo JJ Abrams is very much in the hack camp — he takes the day’s norms and a given formula and comes out with something that reaches the standards of the time

I also think there are several directors/producers who are sub-hack getting work now because they’re disconnected from modern standards or think themselves auteurs and fall far short of interesting result

In repeat viewings the stupidest part about TLJ is how much time it spends on two doofuses who are always fucking up and surviving by miraculous intervention while almost all their comrades get murdered in bulk, and not making it funny enough.

I get the sense there was a difficult balancing act between treating Finn and Poe as the completely absurd, walking punchlines of masculinity that they are, and treating the near-total wipeout of the Resistance with some kind of A Bridge Too Far seriousness, and they got middled on the deal.