Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

I suspect I commented on you a month ago but FUCK YOU ANONYMISED CO-WORKER CUNT. We could have made this project a success but you would rather have done fuck all and tomorrow, on your final day, you're going to slope shoulders and make you having done nothing my problem since I'm here for the next 4 weeks while you're in Disneyland.

What you don't know is I've been mailing your new boss ALL WEEK (since your company ended up as part of ours and he was my boss already) showing where you'd been deceiving him and lying to the customer. I HOPE HE SACKS YOU AND YOU END UP DESTITUTE YOU FUCKER.

Now I just need to work out how to do 12 man weeks activity in 3 weeks with one man.

Aldo, you took on the new 52, you can survive this.

Took the next steps today after another row in the office. Email to people working on the project telling them how we're going forward based on decisions I made this afternoon/evening and another one to our shared management pointing out how workshy he's been and the only effort he's put in is noting conversations he wants to use to claim failure isn't his fault.

He flies home tomorrow, he might be having a packet of crisps and a wank for dinner for all I know as I'm out on my own. He took a taxi back to the hotel as soon as we stopped arguing, I walked back and composed the emails in my head then typed them before coming out to eat.

By making the decisions I have I've raised success rates from single figures to approaching 50%. A firm hand over the other people working on it will increase that further. I'm actually more relaxed than I was yesterday.

I'm at the stage that if they backed him over me then I would go back to my old place that sacked me at the beginning of the year - they've already asked and the guy that sacked me has gone.

Working with other people is one of the most unnatural things possible. It’s like a screen door on a submarine. Every job I’ve worked at has been littered with shit heads

So, last week at work, I was, for the third time in my life, the target of anti-semitism ... despite being a gentile.

It's a very strange situation which I'm currently processing, and mulling over whether I report the colleague or not. Perhaps you lot could advise.

The situation is, crowded corridor full of people leaving at end of day; someone has sprayed aftershave around, someone else glares at me then says 'Smells of Jew' and melts into the crowd laughing.

Now the person in question is a Muslim (this is happening in Britain, for context, during some seasonal work which involves shifting stuff around in a sort of warehouse environment) who appears to be part of a bit of a boy's club slightly separate from the rest of the other, perfectly nice Asian people who work there. This boy's club I've overheard discussing 9-11 conspiracy theories a couple of times as well as being laddish and 'banter' in general and not doing a lot of work (even by my standards). I believe they have in general identified me as someone who is a loser because I turn up and do the work.

The other two times previously were in a different workplace and from a dodgy housemate respectively. White people both times, both fellows prone to their conspiracy theories though which appears to be the link.

I don't know if it's something to do with wearing glasses, or something to do with me being very distantly latin american but really that's only visible if you squint at me, I think. Some sephardic ancestry is hinted at in the official family biography (written in high-toned spanish in the 1890s by my preposterous Andean ancestors) but I'd think anything visual is so slight as to be unnoticeable - other than glasses. Maybe they just shout stuff at people who wear glasses hoping to score a hit?

I feel somewhat individually targeted here, although I suspect the aim is to create that feeling, so I'm putting it to one side. I'm more bothered, as with people using 'gay' as a pejorative, about what happens when they use it at someone who actually has the identity, and that someone or ones is/are walking round my place of work making it unwelcoming to Jews. It is mostly giving me quite a bit to think about rather than bothering me, but is also bothering me.

Was unsure what thread to put this on. We have the 'Is this ...' thread, but then this obviously is. The 'Real England' thread is another contender. But the behaviour is certainly stupid and annoying and done by co-workers. Must stress that I have other, high value Muslim colleagues (we have lengthy conversations about Alfred Hitchcock movies and cooking etc) who seem to be in a separate social group to this lot.

how old are they? whether or not I'd report it would depend on how I thought it would be handled

nobody should be targeted with discrimination, report it

are you in an union?

If that's what going on a busy corridor then I hate to think what is said behind closed doors. You might not get the person to become tolerant and you might not be able to get rid of them but you can certainly make it as uncomfortable for them as they made you feel, and it means that were a situation were to arise where this person had power over eg hiring and firing, then they would have probably a level of accountability necessary to demonstrably show no prejudicial bias.

Also the intent behind calling someone a Jew (I can't believe I'm typing these words) might be less to do with appearance and more to do with traits

I probably would've just knocked their lights out, though that might not be the optimal career move. I'm thankful that I haven't run into a lot of open anti-Semitism in my lifetime. Maybe it's more of a thing in the UK?

Thanks folks.

This group are young, say 19-23-ish. I've got about a decade on them I would say.

Something actually came up today - the boy's club I mentioned before have been messing around to such an extent that the pretty chill manager (himself a Muslim) has had to bollock everyone 4 times now with increasing severity, including a moment today where we had to work in silence 10am-5pm due to errors getting in because of them sitting around talking. I have an email for this manager and might compose a few drafts over the weekend. Keep it statement of fact. Suspect the boy's club are not long for the job.

I think part of the problem is that this is a summer job. A lot of people are students or otherwise not expecting to work here long term. There are permanent jobs here I would definitely go for though so am taking it quite seriously on the grounds of, make good impression, raise chance of getting permanent job. For these guys I think it's basically, this is something not very serious to do before going back to their business degree hence the tooling about and I suppose the outright prejudice. It is in fact the kind of job where friendly chat is quite possible, I do plenty of it with my team, it's just we're not tooling about.

I wouldn't call them stupid or annoying but I've just sat through 45 minutes of half-baked conspiracy theories - AIDS, vaccines, baby milk, Thalidomide - and garbled political and sociological analysis and lots of "But THEY don't want us to know" stuff.

... on to cloning now.

that seems both stupid and annoying tbh

A co-worker took lots of speed, borrowed a company car without permission for personal errands, crashed the car, told several conflicting stories about what happened, got into a screaming match with the boss and then stormed out the back door, slamming it behind her. I'm employee of the year in comparison.

Me: Please fulfill this boilerplate request to set up a thing correctly (of which I have sent variations to you literally dozens of times before) so that I can do my job.
D-nozzle: Wh-what is this request you have sent?! I cannot possibly plumb its intent! (copies fourteen people) Do any of you understand what is being asked for here? Because everything looks like it's set up correctly to me! I'm so very cormfused!
Me: (checks the thing that wasn't set up correctly, sees that it has now been corrected, also sees the date stamp indicating that it has been corrected since he sent the request) Looks like it's fixed now, thank u for the performative feigned ignorance and the dumb and pointless and easily-disproven lie u felt the need to tell.

guy in the next room over has neither an indoor voice nor an outdoor voice but basically just yelling

also he wears polo shirts buttoned up all the way and *really* loves to use the word 'jabroni'

fuck him

i hate to be gender normative here but this is my first time in almost 20 years working in an almost all-female office. Mostly young, 20’s-30’s women. Overheard office conversations hew to the following topics
- kombucha & how to grow it
- dieting
- how much sugar you have had today

last time I ate lunch in the office two coworkers spent my entire lunch hour calculating the caloric value of a serving of tater tots

:( :( :(

it’s such a bummer. they are v nice otherwise

I had to explain to three separate adults in 2018 that even though Outlook didn't linkify the web address they needed to join a meeting, that they could simply copy and paste it into a browser.

They were telling me they couldn't access the meeting because it wasn't a clickable link (I guess cos they were using the Web version of Outlook)

I have found that some people don't know understand what putting an address in a browser means.

You mean that thing where you type 'web site for google' in that little box with the magnifying glass in it?

xpost I've worked in teams where it is mostly women a lot. We end up talking about food or bland tv (I watched some seasons of the Bachelor just to have some smalltalk I could use) because those are safe topics.

xpost Old Lunch, ha I used to own a couple of systems at work and so I would get a lot of "IT support" questions on them because people assumed it was a design flaw. And not like, them not knowing how to double click or how scroll bars work. People especially did not know that if a link was broken in a document or whatever they could just type the motherfucking url or shortcut into the motherfucking address bar. I found myself saying, "it's the space at the top where you would normally type in www dot amazon dot com or www dot gmail dot com" A LOT.

I've posted this on the house buying thread but I've recently encountered two solicitors who are unable to use email. They do the whole thing of getting their secretary to print it out, then scan in the solicitor's reply and email it back.

this is one of the reasons that buying a house in England can often take 6 months

One of my early temp jobs when I was out of college was at an electrical engineering firm. I was the copy person. Every single email (besides all the other documents, cad) that was sent out for a project was printed out. I would make copies for each person that was cc'd and put it in their intray for their files. I would keep a main copy to put in the project file.

Our company email addresses include our full names. If you managed to successfully send me an email, you managed to spell my first name correctly at some point. Even if my address is saved in your contacts, my name is still right there in black and white for you to reference when you're addressing me in the body of your email. It's just five letters, not that difficult.

Torgo?

See? You managed and you don't even send me fifteen emails a day.

who can't spell "lunch"?!

also this made me seriously lol:
>You mean that thing where you type 'web site for google' in that little box with the magnifying glass in it?

whoops. meant to put that in quotes.

manager of another dept asks me a question of an urgent nature that i cannot answer myself
i seek answer from appropriate ppl including my boss
i loop in said manager on boss’s answer
manager replies “i was just alerting you, i don’t need to know all of this”

FUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUUU

oh yeah that shit used to make me wanna put a fist through a wall

it's like "why'd you ask then, asshole"

it’s infuriating

sending email with "high importance" maybe to you buddy, but guess again

Subject line: RUUUUUUSH!!! OH MY GOD THIS IS SUCH A CRUCIAL RUSH I CANNOT EVEN TELL YOU!!!!!!!!!
Email body: Need by 12/15!

One of my favorites, lemme tell you.

Teamleader: please process this ticket asap@!@
Me: hey this is asking us to completely terminate all this customer's services for non payment. Aren't we supposed to warn them and suspend them first?
TL: ...it says terminate in this ticket
Me: I know, but if we do that, we cannot easily UNdo it. You sure?
TL: Just do it ok its urgent

**2 hours later wibbly wobbly effect**
Customer: OMG WTF HAVE U DONE WHY ARE ALL OUR PHONE LINES DOWN
**1 hour later again wibbly wobbly effect**
Sales: OMG U IDIOTS TURN THESE ALL BACK ON NOW WHY DID YOU TERMINATE THEM
Me: BECAUSE YOU TOLD US TO YOU &^^%$%^$
Sales: THEY MUST COME BACK ON NAO
Me: IT ISNT THAT EASY THATS WHY I ASKED ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DO THIS

24 hours later theyre still bitching at us.

BTW customer: maybe try paying your fucking $20k overdue bill too, then this shit wont happen.

It's a beautiful gift to render something that fucking annoying in such hilarious prose Trayce

Haha thank yew :) I mean you have to laugh, or etc.

Apparently a coworker has left a brassiere on the bookshelf in my office. I don't know what to do about this at all.

― how's life, Friday, November 18, 2016 7:51 AM (one year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

She left the company last week and in preparing her workspace for our newest colleague, we discovered several in her desk.

please follow her to her new place of employment and get a job there, to provide updates

4 years after we adopted Lync/Skype, still having to explain to vets that you aren't supposed to dial into the same Skype meeting by phone AND Skype Call.

"Why is it echoing?"

-_-

I love my new job a lot but I miss this thread and I have a fun one today
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We have training going on in a remote, partner location (meaning my company doesn't own the building - it's a typical co-employment scenario). So all equipment is furnished by them, the software used by us.

Training rooms are at a premium in this location, so most training is done on the call center floor, so it's a weird hybrid of virtual/live where all learners are dialed into the conference number/virtual client, so that the facilitator doesn't have to scream, to shut out floor noise, and ensure everybody can hear.

So today training begins for 22 people and..there are no headsets for any of them, despite the person in charge confirming there would be.

TWo hours later, we have 5 headsets, and nobody confirming with me what is going on.

You're a call center. How the hell do you not have headsets?

less about coworkers and more the air quality here - anyone experience working in a dusty, sniffle-inducing environment. is that something that can be addressed via HR

most people have asthma here

so my day job is in publishing. if you are familiar at all with groverhaus then this week I am working on something that can only be described as a groverbook, content from like 10 other books grovered together and formatted in 20 different ways, and my job is to standardize all of this as much as possible.

it's also a pretty big book, so it was split in half with a coworker. who turned out to be making the exact opposite formatting changes I did

'Hi, so since I have my own job which is a different job than the job that you hold, I naturally don't understand the intricacies of your job, but I decided that I should demonstrate my ignorance by, for no particular reason, attempting and wildly failing to do your job for you. Could you please let me know if my unsolicited dipshittery in any way interferes with you doing your job? And if it's not too much trouble, can you also spend half of your day explaining to me all of the aspects of this task that I find confusing but which I never would have even had to think about in the first place if I'd just let you do your job instead of having a traumatic brain event on company time?'

I retract my last post, the book (well, series) I am working on today is a) even more grover-assed, b) I'm supposed to be checking that the changes requested were made, and they are largely not made, and c) a large part of the book is about counting, and those changes requested included typo fixes, so there is a sense of looming dread

german word for "the state of realizing, slowly, that the possibility is not zero that somewhere in this book for children is the word 'cunt'"