Worst Band Names

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Tarden you are wrong!! Well, you could be wrong: I can't finetune my pedantometer precisely enough. The Cyrcle ("Red Rubber Ball") and the Cryan Shames ("Sugar'n'Spice" were both operational in 1966: the Human Beinz only really surface in 1967.

Kim: I wasn't trying to score a point (erm, no, not at all) — I was just certain that misspelling went back some way before the Enz era, even. So "one of" would be misleading.

This all only counts if we also discount the Surfaris, of course.

― mark s, Saturday, 2 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

what about the Sun Ra Arkestra? if you say it with a american accent it's just a mis-spelling rather than a neologism(?right?)(i'm trying it out now, saying "arkestra" & "orchestra" over & over w/ various "american" accents. [but real quietly 'cause my girlfriend's asleep]...uh yeah, OK, not *that* convincing....)

― duane z., Saturday, 2 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Lavemang-smugglarna Kristet utseende the knark

they might not seem so bad for the non swedes but just trust me on this one mkay?

― Anders Loco, Saturday, 2 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I have a tape of Low playing a radio show in Minnesota in '96; after their set is done, the DJ mentions a few upcoming shows by other bands. One of those shows was a double-bill of "Voodoo Love Mint" and "Puddle Wonderful". I always found those to be quintessential bad indie-band names; much like the entire oeuvre of They Might Be Giants, it harkens back to all the unfunny people I knew in high school and college who, among other things, believed that Pythonesque absurdity could be had merely by putting together incongruous adjectives and nouns.

Trying to name a band is hard as hell; to pick something out that conveys a bit of what you do -- but without sounding pretentious or jokey or nondescript -- is amazingly difficult. The more serious your band is, the harder it gets.

― Phil, Sunday, 3 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Oh, and yes, I know that "puddle wonderful" is a cummings phrase. It doesn't matter, though; such an allusion, clever as it may be, does not prevent the name from initially annoying me. And, let's face it -- we do, human as we are, overlook great bands, books, movies and so on, because they're badly named. How many people have skipped Chet Raymo's The Dork of Cork because, at a glance, they thought it was a jokey book about a very absorbent phallus, rather than a lovely lyrical tale about an Irish dwarf?

― Phil, Sunday, 3 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Yogi Phlegm (jazz-rock fusion band from the early 70s).

― scott, Monday, 4 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Planes Mistaken For Stars (which I lifted for a poem)

Paul Westerberg stole that one too ;)

― Larms, Wednesday, 6 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Nembrionic Hammerdeath

Gotta love them metal bands.

― Nathan, Tuesday, 19 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

one month passes...

Stryper is horrible and R.E.M with all the "it doesn't mean rapid eye movement" business is horrible as well.

― Lindsey B, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Apparently the most popular band at my friend Matt's Long Island high school was named...

"Tijuana Caravan"

― Tracer Hand, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

RAPEMAN....but I like the record.

― David, Sunday, 12 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

It is in tribute to Japanese comic, no?

Built To Spill is a winner (or is that loser?). Moldy Peaches.

NERD (like the record though).

Daft Punk.

Any band with number.

dB's (or is that Deebees? DBs? db-s?).

THE BEATLES.

Modest Mouse.

Guided by Voices (christian rock in beercan disguise).

― nathalie, Sunday, 12 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I forgot to mention: DAAU (aka Die Anarchistische Abent Unterhaltung)

― nathalie, Sunday, 12 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

fluff, fluff, fluff and the cuddleyness

dalek beach party

― flowersdie, Wednesday, 15 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Somebody mentioned Rapeman. Would that apply to the Amboy Dukes as well?

― dave q, Wednesday, 15 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

two weeks pass...

"Steamboat Willie & The Electric Techno Buttplugin' MuthaFuckas'. ........and that's the truth!!!

― Jedeye Jonzee, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Mott the Hoople. Seriously stupid name for anything, let alone a band.

― thomas boyd, Sunday, 9 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Llama Farmers crap name crap band.

In defence of Prefab Sprout old Paddy Sprout sez he's was trying to sound as unlike the rest of the postpunk acts as possible so picked a name which sounded like a late 60's/early 70's prog band.

― Billy Dods, Sunday, 9 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

And, I believe, McAloon originally thought of the name in 1973 anyway.

― Robin Carmody, Sunday, 9 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

two months pass...

Super Furry Animals anybody?

― Dave S, Sunday, 25 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

How about the Rainbow Butt Monkeys?

― Kim, Sunday, 25 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Groove Armada. I mean, really. Come on.

Aleka's Attic and Alisha's Attic.

― Arthur, Sunday, 25 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Reigndance. Ugh.

― Nicole, Sunday, 25 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

so you haven't changed your mind on that one, nicole?

killing joke is still the stupidest

― mark s, Sunday, 25 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I forgot I posted it before. But I just like typing it anyway.

Reigndance, Reigndance, Reigndance!

― Reigndance, Sunday, 25 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Oh Killing Joke clearly is not the stupidest name. How can it possibly be the stupidest when there's another band out there that decided to call themslves Helloween?

Reigndance is pretty terrible tho. And Dalek Beach Party.... whuhh...

― Kim, Sunday, 25 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I think 'Lubricated Goat' wins it.

Although 'Scraping Foetus off the Wheel' was always a favorite.

― Dave225, Monday, 26 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Umm, I love them completely, but how can they write such wonderful lyrics & still have decided to call themselves the Pet Shop Boys?
Don't most jam bands have atrocious names?
Cutesy riot grrl band names get on my nerves, for the most part. Emily's Sassy Lime.
Superchunk is a terrible name.
the Murder City Devils. sounds like hockey night to me.
Tortoise being named what they are, I ought to have known what I was getting into.

― daria gray, Monday, 26 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Two words: Vaginal Croutons

― cybele, Monday, 26 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Blendband
The Church (love the band, hate the name)

― Mr Noodles, Monday, 26 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

In the internet age the worst possible name is definitely "The The". Impossible to find them on the web with Google (which ignores the article "the" in the query) or to find them on Amazon (same reason). Matt Johnson should seriously think of a new name. "TheThe" would be ok with me.

― alex in mainhattan, Tuesday, 27 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

As a New Yorker of semitic extraction, I could never quite get my head around the idea that there was a rapper called "The Lox.

― Marcel Post, Thursday, 29 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

he shoulda been called the finelox!

― Kim, Thursday, 29 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

"people I knew in high school and college who, among other things, believed that Pythonesque absurdity could be had merely by putting together incongruous adjectives and nouns."

An Emotional Fish. Nggh.

― OleM, Saturday, 8 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Simply Saucer=fruitiest name ever. Thimply Thauther, dahling.

― Arthur, Saturday, 8 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

two months pass...

There are a couple of incredibly stupid band names I've came across...

- Scary German Guy - Anal Blast - The Meatshits - Old Lady Drivers - Asshole Parade

― Bryant G., Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Try this on for size:
The Canonical List of Weird Band Names

― Lord Custos, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Oh, waitaminute. Try this one. It's more up to date.
The Even More Canonical List of Weird Band Names
Go nuts.

― Lord Custos, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Coldplay. What the fuck is it meant to mean anyway?

― electric sound of jim, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

No Time for Talking was Campbell Kneale's [Birchville Cat Motel etc] band when he was a teenager in my hometown, Nelson.

― elizabeth anne marjorie, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Wet Wet Wet
Big Head Todd and the Monsters
Throbbing Gristle
Mike and the Mechanics

New Zealand bands: Pumpkinhead
The Dribbling Darts of Love
Betchadupa
Crowded House
Fuck Off Cuntface
Straitjacket Fits
Semi Lemon Kola
S.P.U.D. [society for the protection of unborn dogs]
Cassandra's Ears
Proud Scum (hmmm...actually I'm not sure about this one...maybe i'm just used to hearing it, or i'm silly/stupid enough to maybe like it)
Love's Ugly Children
i heartily second An Emotional Fish for worst, but i defend Def Leppard!

― elizabeth anne marjorie, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

ah the Dribbling Darts of Love. Their hideous moniker prevented a significantly younger me from going anywhere near their record, despite the fact it was actually quite good

― electric sound of jim, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

See Elizabeth i told you there would someone else in the world who liked the Dribbles' first EP.

― hamish, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

HOOBASTANK.

― kevin enas, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Proud Scum is a fucken choice band name! yr right about all those others tho

― duane, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Friends of Dean Martinez - So, they had to change it from Friends of Dean Martin. Why not scrap the whole briliiant concept? Pan sonic they're not.

Songs: Ohia - This manages to be bad is so many ways. "Songs" - oh really, you do those? The colon, you just know has some tedious anecdote to explain it. Ohia, too. (He's from Ohio, you see.)

That's what bugs me about so many of these wacky band names - the yawnsome stories you suspect are behind them. They're like lapel buttons saying, "Ask me about my band name!"

― Curt, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

men without hats
toiling midgets
gaye bikers on acid
severed heads
weezer
xtc
bow wow wow
truebliss
blind melon

― elizabeth anne marjorie, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Dalek I Love You. Belching Penguins. Video Free Europe.

There may be worse examples, but my brain is prolly mercifully hiding them from me.

― Christine "Green Leafy Dragon" Indigo, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Severed Heads is a great name! Even before I heard them I somehow knew exactly what they sounded like. Although maybe that was more because of the LP sleeve..

― electric sound of jim, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I can't decide if Renaldo and the Loaf should be under best or worst names. But I always imagine some fancypants Spanish dandy next to a steaming pile of poo. Maybe that was their intention.

― Arthur, Monday, 4 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

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