yerac you should write a book with all these characters, seriously
i'd read it
― F# A# (∞), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:07 (five years ago) link
same
― don piano (Ross), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:08 (five years ago) link
Ha, he would literally get mad if someone started a big printing job in the morning and he had to wait for his articles. This was at B4rcl4ys.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:09 (five years ago) link
gonna reimagine it thusly
"Thomas, a well-meaning intellectual who frequented Santiago's finest literary salon, had a penchant for defecating at the establishment's public lavatory. His adoration drove him to lengthy cubicle breaks in which he would sit for hours; like a king on his throne."
― F# A# (∞), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:16 (five years ago) link
Change location, this was in NYC. He also used to disappear for long periods of time to go to Barnes and Noble for every author appearance so he could get a signed book to sell on ebay. And he kept a decoy outer coat on his chair at all times so no one would ever know if he left work early.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:23 (five years ago) link
I think he is now at N0mur4.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:24 (five years ago) link
My office is very small and not that soundproof, so I always sit down on the toilet, it makes less noise. Also, I don't poop unless it's mostly the people I don't really like who are left. I've been a lot more adamant about this since entering a pretty intense office romance. And less concerned with Tinder.
― Frederik B, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:25 (five years ago) link
that sounds very bad
― ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:26 (five years ago) link
like it's so far from soundproofing that you can't drop a deuce without the office hearing your every plop? and one of those people who might hear you you're in a romantic relationship with? just reading this is making me anxious
― ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:27 (five years ago) link
Eh, it's Denmark.
― Frederik B, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:28 (five years ago) link
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9cWnubJ9CEw/hqdefault.jpg
― ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:29 (five years ago) link
Put a thin layer of toilet paper on the water to reduce ploppage noise.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:30 (five years ago) link
*plop*
― cr.ht (crüt), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:32 (five years ago) link
Ha noted wrt loc yeracAnd ya i put toilet paper in the toilet to avoid it splashing everywhere sometimes
― F# A# (∞), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:33 (five years ago) link
the Viz profanisaurus once described this layer of toilet paper as a "pap-baffle"
― R.A. Lafferty, lover of the Russian queen (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:37 (five years ago) link
Toilet pap-er
― F# A# (∞), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:40 (five years ago) link
Change location, this was in NYC.
now imagining the italicized onomatopoeia in this as dashed off by tom wolfe
― difficult listening hour, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:41 (five years ago) link
I worked with a guy that would print out articles every morning to take into the bathroom for his morning poop.
― Yerac, Wednesday, May 23, 2018 1:58 PM (forty-one minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
I did too though now everyone just takes their phones I guess.
I realized I'd been sitting and reading my phone on the toilet last week because my butt went numb.
Also, I once worked somewhere where one of my colleagues took a giant shit on the mens' room floor.
― Benson and the Jets (ENBB), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:44 (five years ago) link
Not on the floor inside a stall - just in the middle of the floor outside the stalls by the sink.
― Benson and the Jets (ENBB), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:45 (five years ago) link
I’d be pretty impressed with that move if said colleague happened to be a woman.
― valorous wokelord (silby), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 18:47 (five years ago) link
Christ Frederik they should install a fan
― don piano (Ross), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:02 (five years ago) link
Or bring a white noise buffer
― don piano (Ross), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:03 (five years ago) link
Different place (M0rg4n St4nl3y) but we had a woman who had some issues and would take a cup of water into the stall with her and it sounded like she was pee'ing while standing up. She left the stall walls, seat and floor wet every single time. She also shit on the seat once and left it and also shit on the floor. This was a small two stall bathroom and it happened enough that eventually we could narrow down who it was. I spoke to the cleaning woman and she also named the woman but didn't feel like she could complain. I called HR and was definitive about who it was, and they told me to put up a sign about cleaning up after yourself (there were already signs). So hr had a discussion with the woman and her manager and she totally denied it. Nothing else could be done if we didn't see her in the act. Like, in the stall with her.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:07 (five years ago) link
lol.
there was a dude at my last job who came in on the weekends who shat and left it floating in the stall, every week. it was like his weak impotent fist to the corporate world
― don piano (Ross), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:08 (five years ago) link
ha crazy times
― F# A# (∞), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:27 (five years ago) link
When working in offices, I always used to shite at leisure on work time. And frequently take a book with me. No one ever said a word; yet now I realise they were posting about me on message boards. I teach now and merely going for a piss is a luxury. Most of the time it's like having concrete in one's bladder. (I always thought that feeling was unique to camping, but no.)
― The shard-borne beetle with his drowsy hums (Chinaski), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:29 (five years ago) link
even in the laid back public service jobs I've had taking a book into the washroom on company time would've got you your balls booted, figuratively
― ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:31 (five years ago) link
From "is gender a spectrum?" to shitting at work in 30 moves (proposed new maleness board description)
― Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:36 (five years ago) link
I know I have told this story before, but at work a woman used to take a piece of cheesecake from Juniors to secretly eat in a stall in the bathroom at least once a week. We would always find the container sticking out of the sanitary napkin bin.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:43 (five years ago) link
I am sure someone is writing on a messageboard somewhere about a creepster girl always staring at them when they were just trying to go to the bathroom to eat in peace (or to take a shit outside of the bowl).
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:46 (five years ago) link
I'd like to take a very brief look at that person's messageboard.
― WilliamC, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 19:52 (five years ago) link
that's actually a pretty sad story imo, extreme shame about food
― Fedora Dostoyevsky (man alive), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:12 (five years ago) link
the kneejerk reaction against shame movement needs to take a good hard fuckin look at itself when the boundaries encompass shitstall cheesecake subterfuge
― laurel or hardyhearin (darraghmac), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:17 (five years ago) link
like
shame away
shame away lads
this is gods work
― laurel or hardyhearin (darraghmac), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:18 (five years ago) link
i mean
u dont eat where u shit this is known
― laurel or hardyhearin (darraghmac), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:19 (five years ago) link
darragh, it is bad that the woman feels such shame about food that she hides in the toilet to eat cheesecake
― ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:21 (five years ago) link
you're being driven mad by your need to be contrary
Unless you're a bear. Bears pretty much have to do both things in the woods.
― kilohertz so good (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:22 (five years ago) link
Yeah, it was really sad. Everyone constantly ate at their desks so it was really depressing that someone needed to hide.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:22 (five years ago) link
One time I did get a jolt because she had gotten the strawberry cheesecake and I thought it was a large amount of blood all over the container at first.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:24 (five years ago) link
jim its ok its only a bad message board
― laurel or hardyhearin (darraghmac), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:25 (five years ago) link
i hope this woman got the help she clearly needed
― laurel or hardyhearin (darraghmac), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:26 (five years ago) link
people who think they can behave one way on the internet and another way irl and dismiss their behavior on the internet are part of the problem imo
― weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:29 (five years ago) link
xp. this but unironically
― ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:30 (five years ago) link
christ tho
― laurel or hardyhearin (darraghmac), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:31 (five years ago) link
ppl who cannot/choose not to discern a difference between (or draw too clear a link between) throwaway posts on a message board about ppl from a story several years old that are not reading those posts (said comments being hardly particularly vicious-even if the subject existed as a real person for the purposes of the thread in question, which imo they dont) as if that is a "behaviour" to be judged in tones most serious and linked as a reference to behaviour irl or indeed actual problems either online or irl are very definitely part of the problem imo
― laurel or hardyhearin (darraghmac), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:45 (five years ago) link
I was thinking La Lachera's post was about trolls online vs real life and not about the stories just told here. I could be wrong.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:49 (five years ago) link
If it's about the cheesecake story, I'll own that. It was a decade ago and everyone likely didn't handle it well because it was an odd thing to happen in a corporate office.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 20:53 (five years ago) link
dmac otm
― don piano (Ross), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 22:30 (five years ago) link
back on the masculinity thing, a friend of mine told me her (now ex) husband wouldn't help with a lot of the child-rearing, in large part because it was "wussy." cf taking the kid out to a park or something by himself, driving around the kid by himself, not wanting to wear the baby in a sling. not because he was opposed to slings, which is quite defensible, but because it would impact his image, he felt self-conscious about it and wanted her to do it at all times. he was generally very hands off it sounds like, not affectionate with the kid. whatever gets triggered when you set eyes on your child for the first time, it didn't happen.
i've known a couple other dudes like this, who would seemingly rather do anything other than handle being a dad. i find it mystifying moreso now that i'm one myself.
― omar little, Wednesday, 23 May 2018 22:41 (five years ago) link