Rolling Maleness and Masculinity Discussion Thread

Is this why men take forever to poop? You've been burdened by the shame?

nah, it's just good to waste company time iirc

I worked with a guy that would print out articles every morning to take into the bathroom for his morning poop.

yerac you should write a book with all these characters, seriously

i'd read it

same

Ha, he would literally get mad if someone started a big printing job in the morning and he had to wait for his articles. This was at B4rcl4ys.

gonna reimagine it thusly

"Thomas, a well-meaning intellectual who frequented Santiago's finest literary salon, had a penchant for defecating at the establishment's public lavatory. His adoration drove him to lengthy cubicle breaks in which he would sit for hours; like a king on his throne."

Change location, this was in NYC. He also used to disappear for long periods of time to go to Barnes and Noble for every author appearance so he could get a signed book to sell on ebay. And he kept a decoy outer coat on his chair at all times so no one would ever know if he left work early.

I think he is now at N0mur4.

My office is very small and not that soundproof, so I always sit down on the toilet, it makes less noise. Also, I don't poop unless it's mostly the people I don't really like who are left. I've been a lot more adamant about this since entering a pretty intense office romance. And less concerned with Tinder.

that sounds very bad

like it's so far from soundproofing that you can't drop a deuce without the office hearing your every plop? and one of those people who might hear you you're in a romantic relationship with? just reading this is making me anxious

Eh, it's Denmark.

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9cWnubJ9CEw/hqdefault.jpg

Put a thin layer of toilet paper on the water to reduce ploppage noise.

*plop*

Ha noted wrt loc yerac

And ya i put toilet paper in the toilet to avoid it splashing everywhere sometimes

the Viz profanisaurus once described this layer of toilet paper as a "pap-baffle"

Toilet pap-er

Change location, this was in NYC.

now imagining the italicized onomatopoeia in this as dashed off by tom wolfe

I worked with a guy that would print out articles every morning to take into the bathroom for his morning poop.

― Yerac, Wednesday, May 23, 2018 1:58 PM (forty-one minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I did too though now everyone just takes their phones I guess.

I realized I'd been sitting and reading my phone on the toilet last week because my butt went numb.

Also, I once worked somewhere where one of my colleagues took a giant shit on the mens' room floor.

Not on the floor inside a stall - just in the middle of the floor outside the stalls by the sink.

I’d be pretty impressed with that move if said colleague happened to be a woman.

Christ Frederik they should install a fan

Or bring a white noise buffer

Different place (M0rg4n St4nl3y) but we had a woman who had some issues and would take a cup of water into the stall with her and it sounded like she was pee'ing while standing up. She left the stall walls, seat and floor wet every single time. She also shit on the seat once and left it and also shit on the floor. This was a small two stall bathroom and it happened enough that eventually we could narrow down who it was. I spoke to the cleaning woman and she also named the woman but didn't feel like she could complain. I called HR and was definitive about who it was, and they told me to put up a sign about cleaning up after yourself (there were already signs). So hr had a discussion with the woman and her manager and she totally denied it. Nothing else could be done if we didn't see her in the act. Like, in the stall with her.

lol.

there was a dude at my last job who came in on the weekends who shat and left it floating in the stall, every week. it was like his weak impotent fist to the corporate world

ha crazy times

When working in offices, I always used to shite at leisure on work time. And frequently take a book with me. No one ever said a word; yet now I realise they were posting about me on message boards. I teach now and merely going for a piss is a luxury. Most of the time it's like having concrete in one's bladder. (I always thought that feeling was unique to camping, but no.)

even in the laid back public service jobs I've had taking a book into the washroom on company time would've got you your balls booted, figuratively

From "is gender a spectrum?" to shitting at work in 30 moves (proposed new maleness board description)

I know I have told this story before, but at work a woman used to take a piece of cheesecake from Juniors to secretly eat in a stall in the bathroom at least once a week. We would always find the container sticking out of the sanitary napkin bin.

I am sure someone is writing on a messageboard somewhere about a creepster girl always staring at them when they were just trying to go to the bathroom to eat in peace (or to take a shit outside of the bowl).

I'd like to take a very brief look at that person's messageboard.

that's actually a pretty sad story imo, extreme shame about food

the kneejerk reaction against shame movement needs to take a good hard fuckin look at itself when the boundaries encompass shitstall cheesecake subterfuge

like

shame away

shame away lads

this is gods work

i mean

u dont eat where u shit this is known

darragh, it is bad that the woman feels such shame about food that she hides in the toilet to eat cheesecake

you're being driven mad by your need to be contrary

u dont eat where u shit this is known

Unless you're a bear. Bears pretty much have to do both things in the woods.

Yeah, it was really sad. Everyone constantly ate at their desks so it was really depressing that someone needed to hide.

One time I did get a jolt because she had gotten the strawberry cheesecake and I thought it was a large amount of blood all over the container at first.

jim its ok its only a bad message board

i hope this woman got the help she clearly needed

people who think they can behave one way on the internet and another way irl and dismiss their behavior on the internet are part of the problem imo

xp. this but unironically

christ tho

ppl who cannot/choose not to discern a difference between (or draw too clear a link between) throwaway posts on a message board about ppl from a story several years old that are not reading those posts (said comments being hardly particularly vicious-even if the subject existed as a real person for the purposes of the thread in question, which imo they dont) as if that is a "behaviour" to be judged in tones most serious and linked as a reference to behaviour irl or indeed actual problems either online or irl are very definitely part of the problem imo

I was thinking La Lachera's post was about trolls online vs real life and not about the stories just told here. I could be wrong.