hyperbole, by j0rdan s.

not really at all. i love vegetables. last night i had white beans and kale for dinner. i just have specific aversions.... mostly to things that are soft and/or slimy and sweet (fruits like peaches, strawberries, bananas etc, also lots of desserts, mushrooms aren't sweet but texturally i can't). but idk, i love oysters even tho they're slimy... i was just convincing my roommate last night to eat fish roe. but i like things that are salty (name anything) and i also like things that are watery (celery, apples, tomatoes, watermelon etc) so i get why i really respond positively to the taste of brine. it all mostly sense to me in my head as i've thought a lot about why i'm repulsed by certain things. i always loved citrus bcuz of florida i think. anyway i consider myself as much of an omnivorous eater as mostly anyone.

Your liking celery is the most terrifying thing I've ever learned about you.

wait you think BO smells bad?

this yogurt slander is frankly unbelievable

wait you think BO smells bad?

― the masseduction of lauryn hill (Stevie D(eux)), Thursday, March 15, 2018 7:46 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark

well no :-) but the BO of i.e. a homeless person, yes

what about a homeless man who smells of celery

lol good revive

that makes sense ty j0rd

Re: strawberries and things of that nature, is it the taste or the texture? Like a strawberry/banana smoothie, is that tolerable or even worse? I assume mangoes are out too.

no i mostly like the taste of the fruits. i enjoy a berry smoothie, tho if it’s with banana i just ask for it with some orange juice instead. and blueberries i will eat sometimes because they’re not as fleshy as strawberries. i haven’t yet really tried to make myself eat jams/jellies.

mangoes pile up on the side of the street in miami but yeah i’ve not ever really eaten those.

I don't understand the mango at all, but I've Hass avocados are the bomb -- the only ones I can eat in one serving.

first time i ate an avocado i spat it out, the texture grossed me out so bad

i like them now, but i still have texture hangups, like water chestnuts - they creep me out

water chestnuts otm. also weird springy baby corn. kimchi still gives me trouble sometimes, it has to be really good in order for me to enjoy it.

there is a character in Bleak House loosely based on j0rdan. Lawrence Boythorn, Jarndyce’s boyhood friend, upon arriving late to Jarndyce’s house because someone gave him bad directions (they’re old now): “We have been misdirected, Jarndyce, by a most abandoned ruffian, who told us to take the turning to the right instead of to the left. He is the most intolerable scoundrel on the face of the earth. His father must have been a most consummate villain, ever to have had such a son. I would have that fellow shot without the least remorse!”

ok i would say some of that

lol

have to put sheets on my bed, would pretty much rather kill myself

― J0rdan S., Monday, July 18, 2011 2:05 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark

― dayo, Monday, July 18, 2011 6:10 AM (seven years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Boythorn basically just said this in the part i’m reading

hi guys! j0rdan I am rereading Bleak House after like 10 years and immediately thought of you upon being reintroduced to this character

lmao

have to put sheets on my bed, would pretty much rather kill myself

this will be me in a few hours

i feel this so much

I have never even once in my life successful put on a fitted bottom sheet on the first attempt

i actually enjoy making my bed now

sellout

J0rdan S. Peterson

duvet tu brute

it's annoying for 3 mins but then after you have a perfect new bed!

im trying to learn to love tidying up

not coming naturally

I've never not my bed. Unmade beds look like they have ketchup and food and shit spilled on them.

would go to SABR meetup if it was just a bunch of grandfatherly guys telling stories

― call all destroyer, Saturday, January 30, 2010 3:44 PM

well in that case you could just meet morbs for lunch

― Goon's Anatomy (J0rdan S.), Saturday, January 30, 2010 3:46 PM

i've forgotten most of the things i should slap my friend j0rdan around for

especially after seeing him eat

miss this

what is even happening to us as a nation if there's no hyperbole, by j0rdan s.

not hyperbole, just lovely

the man was truly one of a kind. moreso than even his opinions or personality, what i will remember most about bill is that he was a walking history book. it's not an exaggeration to say that a piece of new york died today as well. it will surprise no one who knows either him or me that he was constantly incredulous over me not knowing basically anything about much of the pop culture that made him who he was -- our conversations were classes for me, punctuated by impressions of bygone actors whose lines he would recall from memory and with recite relish. many ppl know he once dabbled in stand up comedy -- he was in his own way a performer at heart. he soaked up such an incredible amount of new york culture that you cannot access online -- mets games from the 60s, richard pryor stand up sets from the 70s, yo la tengo hannukah shows, WMFU call in shows, leather parties... i'm barely scratching the surface. his memory of these things was so clear. and he never let up, even as he got sick and the world became cruel to him. i was decades younger than him, much healthier, and he made me feel like i was wasting my life in this city. he would drag me to mets games, to movies, even when it was obvious that simply climbing the concourse stairs at citi field was taking its toll. there simply isn't very many people like him left in new york. there are many things killing this city, but people like bill are taking history with them, and we will never get it back.

his appetite for introducing ppl to things was just voracious. i believe the last time we saw each other was earlier this year when he took me to see gregg araki's "totally fucked up" at moma. loved it, still think about the movie often, and it's something i never would have done otherwise. lord knows how many times he had seen it, how easy it would have been to not ride the subway an hour into manhattan on a cold weeknight. i got there late (typical), and since bill proudly refused to own a cell phone, i wasn't sure if he had actually made it. even as the lights went up, i thought maybe i would just be left to walk out alone into the night. but of course, that was never the case. a hand shot up and waved at me.

i will miss his companionship, i will miss knowing i was even a small part of what made him want to criss cross brooklyn queens and manhattan, and i will miss learning from him. he had an incredible run given the cards he was dealt, and yet it's still far too soon. he was a legend to everyone who knew him. rest in peace morbs <3

― J0rdan S., Wednesday, October 21, 2020 10:44 PM (eight minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

thanks mookie <3

Yeah that’s a wonderful tribute.

<3

Good stuff

yeah, i loved reading that too. thanks, j0rdan.

beautiful post

yes -- beautiful tribute

<3 that’s beautiful J0rdan