Why do people leave ILX for good?

Who Killfiled Bambi?

Lol

Your intentions can be pure but someone may just hate the way you look or don't think you fit in

I thought they just killed 'is mum?

To Understand Messageboards, You Need To Understand Bambi

Your intentions can be pure but someone may just hate the way you look or don't think you fit in

yeah if it's one person but the aphorism about assholes applies. if you run into one asshole etc. if everyone is "bullying" you you may just have a persecution complex and a shitty personality.

KM otm!

Fair enough Mordy. Point taken!

@scott ever since Site New Answers I don’t really notice whether threads are ILE or ILM, I just tend to post on music threads. Even there I don’t post much beyond the metal, ambient and italo discussions, I don’t feel comfortable talking about rap, jazz, pop or classical even though I listen to that just as much, happy to just vote for it around yearly poll time.

usually I leave for months at a time because I feel inferior to everybody and probably took something someone said to me way too personally but I come back cos I find things on here that I don't find elsewhere.

i went through your 2017 metal list on Youtube and had a lot of fun doing it. it's exactly the kind of stuff i want to hear more of. cheers.

x-post

can we all bully mordy off the board now pls

after reading Neanderthal's comment and agreeing with it, I think I just realized I left ILX for a protracted period because Google Reader and my (relatively) new job took its place for a few years, and then I gradually started coming back and posting after they killed Google Reader and life got slightly less hectic (and also because I found out about Zing Touch)

Have left periodically because of boredom - with myself and the board. I don't think I've ever seriously fallen out with anyone or been especially upset by anyone. Also, real life stuff.

everyone yelled at Calum on ILX and he left and wrote, like, five books. i'd like to think that we inspired him. i would also probably read his book on Cannibal Holocaust published by Columbia University Press.

https://cup.columbia.edu/book/cannibal-holocaust/9781911325116

a well-timed otm can imbue a discussion with a deep richness of meaning that would be missing otherwise

yeah if it's one person but the aphorism about assholes applies. if you run into one asshole etc. if everyone is "bullying" you you may just have a persecution complex and a shitty personality.

― Mordy, Tuesday, February 27, 2018 5:38 PM (five minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

when everyone on ilx is bullying/'bullying' someone it's usually because ppl get the scent of blood and want to take part in the pile on as much as anything else imo? (or you get a person who's no good at shrugging off zings, so every thread they post in becomes dominated by then indignantly pushing back against criticism and pissing off everyone, including those who weren't even bothered by whatever the original infraction that prompted the criticism was)

new one from Edinburgh University Press this year:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Style-Sleaze-Exploitation-1959-1977-Traditions/dp/1474409253

can we all bully mordy off the board now pls

please

it's the only way you'll learn

i love u all :*

For a moment, forget the bad days

generally they're bullying some covert passive-aggressive bully who thinks they're bambi

you're doing what every person everywhere does, which is to generalize from your own experience to understand the world and the experience of others, but as valuable as this reflex is, it never delivers as much as it promises. the lesson you learned in fifth grade was extremely valuable to you, and for the very reason that it is so vivid and valued, it is induces a kind of blindness to the experiences it does not fit.

fwiw, the bambi types present a safe tackling dummy for those who feel a need to display their tackling ability. they are especially at risk during the big social scrum that happens at puberty, where so many power dynamics are being explored and exploited.

i have met exactly 0 true bambis irl - at least as adults

therefore, they never existed. see my first sentence once more.

soref otm, i think that covers a lot of bullying IRL. i knew someone who was relentlessly bullied in school and then he moved to another state. we reconnected years later and i asked him how his school career was after that and he said it was the move was the best thing that could have happened to him. he didn't use this phrase but my sense was that he felt free and he could reboot and no one would know he'd been bullied before.

if you're someone who has been bullied, it's not that your personality is shitty (wtf) it's that it's hard to turn it around and come back from that in the eyes of others. the people who bullied you are not likely to suddenly become your best friends, and the people who stood idly by are not suddenly going to think you're the world's coolest kid.

i've always been glad i generally coasted through middle school and high school without taking much shit from others. but even so when i left my hometown damn that felt like a freeing moment.

i was thinking about that story i read recently, those horrible parents in SoCal who homeschooled their 13 kids. how one of them went to school and was bullied for her clothes, because she never took a bath, because of other reasons directly related to her being abused at home. i saw that too, lots of these awkward kids who were completely decent people but just didn't fit in, and took a ton of shit.

everyone yelled at Calum on ILX and he left and wrote, like, five books. i'd like to think that we inspired him.

Calum was a shitposter who kept trying to insist to me privately that he was just joking, when he had the sense of humor of a gnat.

ppl posting one word "otm" posts have been a blight on this site for as long as i've been here. if you're not adding anything with your post why are you posting?

― Mordy, Tuesday, February 27, 2018 9:13 AM (fifty-four minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i like to pretend i have friends

one thing i don't get in IRL conversations is when people nod at each other. why nod your head in agreement if you're not adding anything to the conversation? there's no point

*nods*

a well-timed otm can imbue a discussion with a deep richness of meaning that would be missing otherwise

― had (crüt), Tuesday, February 27, 2018 11:52 AM (sixteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

otm

the nice part of messageboards is the conversational aspect and sometimes that means typing dumb messages of agreement as a cue

I mean, if I don't get an 'otm' or response I'm going to assume I didn't make my point clearly enough and follow up my post with eight more posts :)

I don't wanna write a treatise in defence of bullying because bullying is bad

But not everything that happens that u didn't like is bullying either

*nods*

i guess a breeze might have moved your head? what's going on here

these meta-threads that prompt an in-depth discussion about ourselves have always been popular around here. frankly, it's nice to see the whole gang getting together for a chat.

Ya

if you guys miss those women posters so much, you should personally invite them back! encourage them to return!

a couple of us (at least!) have specifically told JBR(L) how much we miss her here; i think she's just found other outlets

Also miss seeing gygax/steve shasta post here.

what if i told you that he does

moo vaughn unmasked

Just realised I have always conflated Steve Shasta with Scott Seward

i guess a breeze might have moved your head? what's going on here

― i remember the corned beef of my childhood (Karl Malone), Tuesday, February 27, 2018 10:15 AM (two minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

o shit i thought it might pass unnoticed, i've got to get the hell out of here

Moo Vaughn is clearly another old poster, not Shasta

some old posters are too old for me

i wish some of you transferred your exacting standards for quality posts to Democratic politicians

The best way to read a long ILX thread is to ctrl-f for “otm” and then read all the posts that were on the money

Damn that's a hack

one thing i don't get in IRL conversations is when people nod at each other. why nod your head in agreement if you're not adding anything to the conversation? there's no point

obv you want different things out of ilx than i do and that's fine esp since you got what you wanted + there's no point crying over spilt milk. ilx pretty much died when nu-ilafl died. i stick around for a few posters/threads but i do ask myself more and more why i'm still here.

we need to move on like moo vaughn has

I have done the obvious gotcha search in case anyone was thinking of doing it, just imagine i c+p'd the results here you know how that would look

yes ilx definitely died when all the hilarious hitler threads stopped

Wins is it a thread connection

Mordy you’re all over the boards with enthusiasm I don’t buy this ennui you’re evincing