Innocuous things that make you irrationally embarrassed

I always think of it as being neurotic, but I guess it's a kind of anxiety

I try to do kind of mindfulness excercises when it happens, which works to some extent, but (and this is perhaps because of Freudian propaganda) I can't help but think it's caused by a more general unease that should be addressed in a different way

coworker bitching out her cable company on the phone (no doubt deservedly, but still)

responses to tweets

The excelsior thread

when people tweet at companies about mildly negative customer service issues

guy i follow tweeting at chipotle because some fajita vegetables had fallen into the pinto beans and made it into his burrito accidentally

stop ratting out the workers at Chipotle #587 to corporate

or just take it back and get a new burrito

but also oh no i got a couple of vegetables in my burrito is hardly something to complain about jesus

Imagine, having vegetables fall into your meal.

Now, an onion ring in your french fries - there is no complaints made about that.

the hypothetical here is someone with an allergy, but if you had an allergy you'd be stating that and probably be careful to not eat at places with allergens right next to the ingredients you'd pick, anyway

You wanna follow https://twitter.com/customercaring

I made a trivial throwaway remark 5 minutes ago which I just realised is false, and now I am wondering if everyone else is wondering why I said a stupid false thing or if I'm just being weirdly and needlessly sarcastic, but it's far too trivial to bother correcting and everyone else has probably forgotten I said anything already

("it's too bad there isn't a shop selling x on y street" which should have been "it's too bad the shop I am thinking of shut recently but in fact there is another one nearly opposite which has been there for much longer and is kind of a local institution" duh)

that is classic

imo you should double down if questioned. there was NEVER a shop selling x on y street :)

Mh otm

Whenever I'm corrected on something that's very obviously and provably wrong, I like to employ Hank Kingsley's incredulous 'I don't think so.'

Went on Nextdoor to log my complaints about a neighborhood traffic issue. Called the street in question CrestWOOD instead of its actual name, CrestVIEW.

My Lord, those grannies skinned me alive.

u r an unadulterated monster

Crestwood is where all the murders happened

Gonna start walking through their front yards and really piss 'em off.

Walking into a bathroom that the previous occupant has stunk to high heaven and then vacated, taking a perfectly mild and harmless whiz yourself, then walking out of the still stunk-up bathroom just as one of your coworkers is walking in.

for sure

Nice try, how's life. We all know what really happened.

The cafeteria staff at my workplace have started playing music recently to liven the place up. Honestly, it's made all the difference in making another bland Sodexo trough feel more comfortable and relaxed. They usually play older r&b hits, so one morning we'll get Stevie Wonder, another morning we'll get Michael, sometimes we'll get a smattering of Motown hits. Today it was Marvin Gaye and I ended up purchasing my oatmeal to the sounds of Sexual Healing.

lol
that's awesome
if only every oatmeal purchase were that memorable

Just a few minutes ago, a woman in the plaza of the building where I work struggling and struggling to open one of the outward-opening doors against a very strong wind, when there was also a revolving door right there.

When people call Theresa May 'Tresemme'

Also when people call Corbyn a 'cockwomble'

total IE: when I ask for help in a store to locate something, and I'm the one who ends up finding it, and usually I spot it well before I actually grab it because I still want to give them a chance to find it first. and sometimes they do but most of the time they don't, and even more embarrassing and irrational is how i'll sometimes wait for them to give up, tell me they don't have it, then after they walk away i grab it.

When grownups talk about “superheroes” or “superpowers” as a metaphor

Omar, I’ve been in that position so many times! Feeling this.

Kind of like when at work you boss tells you something like "that report should include the red information" and you know this but you just nod gratuitously pretending this is helpful new information.

just mispronounced someones name on the phone at work - i pronounced the surname Blades as in Rubén Blades, it should've been blades like the english word

damn I've been pronouncing Rubén Blades wrong all this time

not that I've ever had occasion to say his name out loud

i just realized that's a dumb comparison because the spanish pronunciation is different but i think Rubén Blades does actually use the english pronunciation himself to an extent

I find it easier to get over embarrasment if you say "forgive me I am not of earth and I don't know yoru ways"

I'm still embarrassed about using Rubén Blades in that anecdote

I pronounced Erik Satie incorrectly once 20 years ago and I still feel embarrassed when I think about it.

the longtime phenomenon of people taking the same "funny" image and editing it into macro after macro, e.g. in an ilx thread or a twitter thread, still popular today after all these years. It was kind of funny the first few times but even then not all that funny, and something just makes me sad and uncomfortable about scrolling through tweet after tweet of each person taking their turn at not being funny in the same way.

i sort of feel that way about all attempts to be funny on the internet -- but i actually came here to post that i basically feel embarrassed posting anything personal on social media, or attempts at humor, or anything that directs attention toward myself. i am not embarrassed of myself, i find the act of drawing attention to myself embarrassing.

this thought brought to you by labor day, one of several genuinely meaningful holidays marred by their parades that i had to endure being in as a young person. imagine being forced to smile and wave at hundreds of strangers multiple times a day.

https://i.imgur.com/WVxwkr4.jpg

that was actually funny

lmao

haha

pplains mvp

Walking into a bathroom that the previous occupant has stunk to high heaven and then vacated, taking a perfectly mild and harmless whiz yourself, then walking out of the still stunk-up bathroom just as one of your coworkers is walking in.

― how's life, Friday, April 20, 2018 2:24 PM (four months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The lunchtime equivalent of this just happened in one of the office pantries. I walked in ready to reheat my relatively inoffensive chicken and potatoes. The whole pantry stunk like fish or fish-sauce mixed with cheese or something? I don't know, it was bad. But I'd have to travel to a completely different floor to use another microwave. The guy eventually came in and took his horrible-smelling food out. I had to sit there for two minutes microwaving my dish and it did nothing to dissipate the smell in the room. Meanwhile, all these people I don't quite know but see around the building all the time keep walking in, getting this sour look on their face and walking out.

The cafeteria staff at my workplace have started playing music recently to liven the place up. Honestly, it's made all the difference in making another bland Sodexo trough feel more comfortable and relaxed. They usually play older r&b hits, so one morning we'll get Stevie Wonder, another morning we'll get Michael, sometimes we'll get a smattering of Motown hits. Today it was Marvin Gaye and I ended up purchasing my oatmeal to the sounds of Sexual Healing.

― how's life, Wednesday, May 2, 2018 8:13 AM (four months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

And another follow up! I just bought a bag of popcorn in the cafeteria to the tune of I'll Make Love To You by Boyz II Men.

Apple keynote speeches / Nintendo directs are excruciating for me. They aren’t entertainment, news, or public speaking of any value whatsoever.

you can't just declare memes, wholesale, as being unfunny. like saying comics are unfunny.