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sub-freddy nightmare house is embarrassing

Yeah, this stuff was all seemingly tailor-made to be imitated by small-town low-budget haunted houses for many Octobers to come.

Can we talk about all the kids sitting around in their tighty whiteys to the tune of Bust a Move during the quarry scene? A chick walks by you wish you could sex her/but you're standing on the wall like you was Poindexter. I didn't need anything about any of that.

how's life, Thursday, 1 February 2018 14:12 (one year ago) link

The mike thing really ticked off the part of me that is still 15 and obsessed with the novel - they took away his whole deal and gave it to the kid who already has like two whole deals 😡

very stabbable gaius (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 14:13 (one year ago) link

Yeah, completely unforgivable.

how's life, Thursday, 1 February 2018 14:17 (one year ago) link

Stan otoh even in the book doesn't have much of a deal beyond "is going to kill himself", when you don't get that upfront it's just a bit of a nothing character

very stabbable gaius (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 14:19 (one year ago) link

xp he also likes birds

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Thursday, 1 February 2018 14:20 (one year ago) link

Likes birds, is doomed: not gonna lie, it isn't much but it's more than this film could be bothered to come up with

Here we get: is Jewish, does uhhh Jewish stuff

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 14:53 (one year ago) link

the change made me wonder if they're planning to kill him off instead for some reason

Simon H., Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:01 (one year ago) link

wins otm. enjoyably Stranger Things, but not very scary and the payback was kind of a cop out 'I am not afraid of you' believe in yourself garbage. Shame really. I liked it more than I didn't like it

Badgers (dog latin), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:03 (one year ago) link

I should watch this, I guess. My sister loved it and she's the harshest horror fan I know. Nothing passes muster with her (the last film I can remember us giving a collective two thumbs up was Home Movie).

Senior Soft-Serve Tech at the Froyo Arroyo (Old Lunch), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:09 (one year ago) link

It isn't completely awful it just doesn't live up to its rep imo. Hopefully some people will come and say nice things about it at some point (jclc really liked it iirc)

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:11 (one year ago) link

If you like stranger things at its best you'll like the interactions between the kids for sure. Wee nebbish germophobe + Finn wolfhard are a legit hilarious double act

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:15 (one year ago) link

I appreciate it as a coming of age film, Finn Wolfhard (still can't believe this is his real name) was a great Richie, the actress who played Beverly was great. Like someone upthread said, it felt a little thin for 2.5 hours, but there were plenty of genuinely creepy moments

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:20 (one year ago) link

Finn wolfhard and chosen Jacobs

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:21 (one year ago) link

xp yeah, eddie was great too, his chapters were always the hardest for me to get through in the book, but the kid who played him had a lot of charm and one of the best "i'm horrified" looks in the biz

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:21 (one year ago) link

not enough sewergangbanging imo

your skeleton is ready to hatch (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:25 (one year ago) link

It was interesting to read in that vulture piece that the original script had a version of that scene! (The fukunaga version of this would for sure have been better, nobody doubts this right)

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:28 (one year ago) link

it’s so weird to me that this beloved book, which has spawned a tv series and two movies and is to this day a cornerstone of its writer’s career, has a pivotal scene where a bunch of underage kids fuck in a sewer

your skeleton is ready to hatch (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:30 (one year ago) link

no doubt. cary's a mean old daddy, but i like him fine.

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:31 (one year ago) link

xp it's surprisingly easy to forget about considering there are approximately 2000 pages where kids aren't fucking in a sewer

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:31 (one year ago) link

Another thing I thought was well done was what king in the book calls the apocalyptic rock fight. I like how they abruptly cut to a wide shot and it suddenly looks exactly as pathetic as a rock fight would irl. Reminds me of a similar moment in twin peaks s3 where shit's getting crazy and there's a sudden cut to a master shot that just hilariously deflates the scene

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:32 (one year ago) link

Cocaine is a helluva drug xp

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 15:33 (one year ago) link

I already discussed this in the thread on King adaptations as well, but I liked it. Nothing really scary beyond the prologue (though I did jump during the projector scene), and (echoing clemenza in the other thread), I'm just sick to death of busy CGI effects. It would be nice if the whole 80s nostalgia thing that a lot of movies/TV are going for these days would extend one of them using 80s-style practical FX.

The cast was fantastic, and I would go so far as to say that this is one of the best set of child actors I've ever seen on film. The film worked for me as both a coming-of-age movie and even as a sentimental Spielberg-esque suburban fantasy (call me a sap, but the stuff with the brothers worked for me in a straightforward tearjerker-y way). Just not so much as a horror movie.

iCloudius (cryptosicko), Thursday, 1 February 2018 17:54 (one year ago) link

the kids' swearing was the best part of the movie

Simon H., Thursday, 1 February 2018 17:55 (one year ago) link

loved the book and was disappointed by the movie, structurally it was a failure because the power and immensity of the evil of 'it' in the book is best demonstrated by the frequent flipping back and forth between the childhood/adult timelines. despite everything they went thru as kids, they forgot everything and ended up repeating and recreating the abusive and traumatic and toxic circumstances of their youth (i.e. beverly's husband). that was totally lost in the movie and defanged 'it'

flappy bird, Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:07 (one year ago) link

this is one of the best set of child actors I've ever seen on film

otm. issues I had were with the script, not with the performances. the adults didn't really act like recognizable humans to me, but I kind of understand that as an artistic choice. the novel makes clear that It affects all the adults in Derry to make them either monsters or bystanders. but it could've been a little less bodysnatchers-y

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:11 (one year ago) link

Yeah I could see what they were going for and I liked that they made Henry's & Bev's dads and the pharmacist even nastier but it's a bit much to have every adult be a dead-eyed psychopath the whole time

Similarly the creepy tv show in the background the whole time is neat in some ways but having the adults be literally hypnotised by a subliminal message is a bit too, well, literal

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:22 (one year ago) link

Reminds me of a similar moment in twin peaks s3 where shit's getting crazy and there's a sudden cut to a master shot that just hilariously deflates the scene

― scrüt (wins), Thursday, February 1, 2018 9:32 AM (two hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Ha, okay, the TP scene you're referring to is hilarious and I think you've sold me on this for all the wrong reasons.

Senior Soft-Serve Tech at the Froyo Arroyo (Old Lunch), Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:26 (one year ago) link

iirc from the book, the pharmacist was not a bad dude at all.

how's life, Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:28 (one year ago) link

In the book it's suggested that even tho he's "doing the right thing" he takes a sadistic pleasure in upending eddie's world

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:31 (one year ago) link

Ha, okay, the TP scene you're referring to is hilarious and I think you've sold me on this for all the wrong reasons.

If you go in for the comedy those are prob the right reasons! It's what this film does well

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:32 (one year ago) link

yeah the pharmacist was certainly mean, at the very least. he was also very involved in the 1930 murder of the gangsters in the book.

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:36 (one year ago) link

Oh yeah, I remember that now.

how's life, Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:46 (one year ago) link

i haven't watched this one yet but is it actually any good?

it got a lot of mixed reviews

infinity (∞), Thursday, 1 February 2018 18:51 (one year ago) link

maybe if you haven't read the book

flappy bird, Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:03 (one year ago) link

i actually haven't

so a classic case of book is better?

infinity (∞), Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:06 (one year ago) link

worth watching for sure, prob better if you haven't read the book

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:10 (one year ago) link

FUCK THIS MOVIE

kurt schwitterz, Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:11 (one year ago) link

well then

infinity (∞), Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:12 (one year ago) link

lol

scrüt (wins), Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:12 (one year ago) link

yeah i mean there isn't really any way to adapt a 1,100+ page novel into a two or even three hour movie. should've been another miniseries. but i can't emphasize enough how badly they fucked up the movie by altering the structure of the book. one of the central ideas/qualities of 'it' is that it is eternal & cyclical, and by flipping back and forth between the 50s and the 80s in the book, demonstrating how nothing has changed in the future even as the kids struggle and fight and do their best in teh 50s, the book really successfully conveys an omnipresent evil that is so much larger and more vague and scarier than its main avatar, a scary clown. the book is about childhood trauma and how it reverberates into adulthood. the movie is about killing an evil clown. dud

flappy bird, Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:33 (one year ago) link

unfortunately i think w/the way Hollywood tries to maximize their product, dividing IT into two separate parts in this way was the most palatable way for the films to reach a wider audience. they can easily say, oh sure the kids in Pt 1 and the adults in Pt 2 and be done with it, they don't even have to be structurally clever or interesting.

obviously a weird decision but i mean this is an industry that turned a 300 page kids' book into a 9 hour trilogy just to get the most bang for their buck.

omar little, Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:42 (one year ago) link

maybe not "weird" per se, it makes perfect sense, but it's the easy way out.

omar little, Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:42 (one year ago) link

THIS STUPID MOVIE HAS CGI BLOOD IN LIKE THE FIRST 5 MINUTES. JUST USE REAL FAKE BLOOD, FUCKING IDIOTS. ALSO EVERYTHING DOESN'T HAVE TO BE STRANGER THINGS, DICKHEADS!

kurt schwitterz, Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:56 (one year ago) link

when that diaper baby "every one floats down here bobby" or whatever scene the baby boy gets dragged and it's like the worst cgi blood in the history of the medium fuck fyck fuckfyewhfoi

kurt schwitterz, Thursday, 1 February 2018 19:57 (one year ago) link

it's like the worst cgi blood in the history of the medium

why is this bad tho

mark s, Thursday, 1 February 2018 20:00 (one year ago) link

because it look stup and dumb and not goopy and drippy

kurt schwitterz, Thursday, 1 February 2018 20:02 (one year ago) link

and like filmmakers that dont just drag a baby boy and use real fake blood in a fuckin HORROR MOVIE in a scene where a boy is dragged and blood is there are just shitty filmmakers by default and they should just kill themselves. also that stupid clown dance was stupid and for idiots.

kurt schwitterz, Thursday, 1 February 2018 20:03 (one year ago) link

https://media.giphy.com/media/XyAGm96eUIPsc/giphy.gif

WOW REAL SCARY

kurt schwitterz, Thursday, 1 February 2018 20:09 (one year ago) link

xp

The end of this is purest kitsch and how they defeat It is not the half of it, what happens after is exquisitely bad

YouGov to see it (wins), Saturday, 7 September 2019 21:05 (one week ago) link

yeah the book

Can't wait to see this now

flappy bird, Saturday, 7 September 2019 21:14 (one week ago) link

the old pharmacist randomly ripping farts as he walked away seemed like a weird inclusion

FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Saturday, 7 September 2019 21:17 (one week ago) link

Oh flappy I hope you love it <3

I’ve tried not to be too spoilery as I want people to discover how terrible this is for themselves if they’re so inclined

YouGov to see it (wins), Saturday, 7 September 2019 22:27 (one week ago) link

I didn’t truly start getting angry at the movie until the climax. Before that I was at least intermittently entertained and had plenty of moments to step out to use the restroom.

Wish I could talk more about it without spoiling anything!

Conceptualize Wyverns (latebloomer), Saturday, 7 September 2019 22:47 (one week ago) link

it's IT, innit? spoil away imho, just mark it as such

Simon H., Saturday, 7 September 2019 23:04 (one week ago) link

Okay SPOILERS for some of the worst bits of the ending:

There’s a badly directed and boring cgi action sequence that lasts like half an hour, with a giant pennywise who turns into a spider (but still with pennywise head) and the whole thing looks like something from the hobbit movies

The ritual of Chüd in this is some dumb nonsense that doesn’t work and then It throws them all into separate nightmare rooms to retread bits from the first one: Eddie and Richie do their (very wearisome by this point) routine in front of those fucking “not scary/scary” doors again; Bill has the exact same scene of being accused by Georgie in the cellar; Bev is trapped in the bathroom stall with nothing to do; Ben uhh something to do with quicksand I think? Mike doesn’t even get one lol this film hates him

(How Ben and Bev escape their rooms is some amazing cringe but I’ll leave it for someone else to spoil)

Anyway eddie gets given this spike thing by Bev who tells him “this kills monsters if you only believe in it” - turns out she stitched him right up cause it doesn’t work and it kills Eddie. In his dying breath Eddie explains that the way to kill it is to make it transform into something small and vulnerable as it is bound by the physical form it takes (this idea does come from the book, it’s how they are able to hurt werewolf-it with silver) but again Eddie is as full of shit as Bev was and this doesn’t work either. Eventually they come up with the idea of just yelling at It “you dumb bad clown” and the hurtful remarks literally belittle it and they squash its heart

Saving the worst for last: in the epilogue, everyone is living their best life and it’s revealed that they are not losing their memory again as happens in the book because It is definitively dead. They all receive a letter from Stan, who tells them that his suicide was a cunning plan to help them defeat pennywise, as he knew he wouldn’t have the courage to face up to it when it came to the crunch and if he came back he would bring the other losers down. By “taking himself off the board” he ensured their victory. Mike goes to Florida/dies on the way to his home planet

YouGov to see it (wins), Sunday, 8 September 2019 16:45 (one week ago) link

What is that happy crappy?

☮ (peace, man), Sunday, 8 September 2019 19:44 (one week ago) link

The making Pennywise small scene reminded me of the scene at the end of 2004s Peter Pan where the Lost Boys kill Hook by making him depressed

FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Sunday, 8 September 2019 19:47 (one week ago) link

I saw this last night and it was a Good Bad Movie, I will not be taking questions at this time.

direct me now to the many good epilogues in movies

mark s, Tuesday, 10 September 2019 13:05 (one week ago) link

oh also this movie had a brazen steal from Carpenter's "The Thing" that made me laugh and clap.

I saw this last night and it was a Good Bad Movie, I will not be taking questions at this time.

― I don't get wet because I am tall and thin and I am afraid of people (Eliza D.), Tuesday, September 10, 2019 6:01 AM (eight minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

the take i was waiting for

american bradass (BradNelson), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 13:10 (one week ago) link

I wouldn't have thought it would be too difficult to make a better version of the network miniseries featuring a slew of TV actors but I guess it actually is difficult.

I rewatched the miniseries a little while back and at least the first half held up surprisingly well. I don't think I need to see the new ones as it sounds like many of the decisions they made would aggravate me to no end.

Time to Make a Pizza Pact! (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 13:25 (one week ago) link

The endings of both these films are so much worse than the end of the novel it's kind of hilarious

wait so they manage to be WORSE than a prepubescent orgy

brigadier pudding (DJP), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 13:26 (one week ago) link

i saw the first chapter (lol) the other day and like part one of the miniseries i thought it was pretty good! without the adult timeline it's a little like the goonies vs. evil clown but i could get down with the vibe. gonna start cleaning my bathroom to "six different ways." hated the camera-shaking scares though

american bradass (BradNelson), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 14:09 (one week ago) link

I did enjoy the first volume a lot.

When I am afraid, I put my toast in you (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 14:11 (one week ago) link

though the pacing did annoy me, it kept feeling like they were shuttling these characters into different scare zones. i hear it's even worse wrt part two

xp

american bradass (BradNelson), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 14:11 (one week ago) link

That was my problem. I never was a fan of the haunted house jump scare parts, but there were fewer of them in the first volume. I connected more with the coming of age story.

When I am afraid, I put my toast in you (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 14:26 (one week ago) link

It: Chapter Two (2019)
(dir. Andy Muschietti) pic.twitter.com/nMmxlmzE5w

— Simpsons Films (@simpsonsfilms) September 10, 2019

wins is otm that this was really bad, yet somehow i enjoyed it. i think it was just the overall vibe of "adults who were childhood friends get back together and rekindle the flame of first love," i'll take a shot of that no matter how poor the quality.

cheese canopy (map), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 19:24 (one week ago) link

basically like The Big Chill crossed w/The Thing, there's even a suicide at the beginning.

omar little, Tuesday, 10 September 2019 19:27 (one week ago) link

that sounds like it would resonate with a lot of people but it definitely does not resonate with me

i guess i am the opposite of map when it comes to this i think it was just the overall vibe of "adults who were childhood friends get back together and rekindle the flame of first love," in that i am basically not interested under any circumstances.

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 21:40 (one week ago) link

not that it matters what i think or what i like -- It has a life of its own!

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 21:41 (one week ago) link

lol they were running the preview for this before MIDSOMMAR and at first I didn't recognize it and was all "huh this quiet scene with the creepy old lady in her house actually seems p cool" but then they showed the clown and I was like "oh hell no"

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 10 September 2019 21:47 (one week ago) link

You were all about the naked crazy old lady?

When I am afraid, I put my toast in you (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 10 September 2019 22:01 (one week ago) link

wins is otm that this was really bad, yet somehow i enjoyed it. i think it was just the overall vibe of "adults who were childhood friends get back together and rekindle the flame of first love," i'll take a shot of that no matter how poor the quality.


I’d say I wanted this exact vibe, but curdled and made horrific- maybe an unrealistic thing to want from a blockbuster but it’s what the original blockbuster novel does. Here we open with nasty scenes of queerbashing and wifebeating, then it’s determinedly feelgood for the rest of its 3 hours - basically the opposite of the tonal shift that people don’t like in the new Tarantino. This film is so pathologically anxious for its viewers not to feel any adult emotions that it rewrites the ending to remove every last trace of melancholy or ambiguity: no more amnesia, reassurance that stan’s suicide was in fact a heroic sacrifice (did the “hill house is nice actually” guy do punch-up work on this?)

Nothing is allowed to matter, even when kids and main characters start dying it’s rushed through to get to the next dumb fetch quest or ham-handed exposition scene or sub-dream warriors Friendship is Magic garbage. The constant wisecracks undercutting any sense of menace... this is what I imagine watching an avengers movie is like

YouGov to see it (wins), Wednesday, 11 September 2019 07:52 (one week ago) link

direct me now to the many good epilogues in movies

they are all in Wild Things (1998)

now let's play big lunch take little lunch (sic), Wednesday, 11 September 2019 09:35 (one week ago) link

You were all about the naked crazy old lady?

tbh... yes

Οὖτις, Wednesday, 11 September 2019 15:10 (one week ago) link

actually it's gerontophilia

I don't get wet because I am tall and thin and I am afraid of people (Eliza D.), Wednesday, 11 September 2019 15:55 (one week ago) link

lol

☮ (peace, man), Wednesday, 11 September 2019 15:55 (one week ago) link

somehow i enjoyed it. i think it was just the overall vibe of "adults who were childhood friends get back together and rekindle the flame of first love," i'll take a shot of that no matter how poor the quality.

This is basically where I'm at wrt "Chapter 2" also. What makes IT one of the only King books that still kinda has its hooks in me is the both-sides-now child-adult mirroring, with both halves regretting something they don't have yet/anymore. In any case, this one ditches almost all the Stranger Things shit that ruined the first part, so advantage belongs with this one.

Also, yes, scary fast hot naked booby granny gross tango was a highlight.

Also, Mike spiking Bill's water with root -- "What did you do to me?!"

Also, everything everyone negative to say about bullying Pennywise until he turns into Rubber Johnny and sheds copious tears of a murderous clown clearly has never read a single page from the legendarily and lovably embarrassing bibliography of one Stephen King.

Also, production values are entirely too high tbh.

Also, much hotter "not fat anymore" Ben than the ABC mini, even if his chemistry with the rest of the cast is at the level of a hologram.

Also, Xavier Dolan using his last dying breaths to make a joke about his gay basher's mullet looking like a Meg Ryan wig is chef's kiss, and only one of two anti-mullet punchlines made by someone badly wounded.

Also, I don't care what anyone else has to say on this, the curious decision to turn Richie urp-prone Trashmouth into a closeted homo carrying a torch for the somehow straight mama's boy Eddie inhaler-sucking Kaspbrak, and unveiling that plot point vis-a-vis a needle-drop appearance by Pennywise goading Richie into a game of Truth or Dare, and watching this all play out in a movie theater while sitting next to a straight childhood friend with whom I also experienced my first erections in the presence of another dude from sleepover games of "reluctant" Truth or Dare (emphasis on Dare), was let's just say a moment.

But yes, the endings sucked.

Pauline Male (Eric H.), Thursday, 12 September 2019 05:17 (six days ago) link

wins relentlessly otm on this thread esp here:

Nothing is allowed to matter

even torture porn horror schlock allows characters to present themselves as traumatized by the shit they're going through: they get jumpy, they become hyper-vigilant, they become constantly reactive to the possibility of further insult. tobe hooper was great at this -- once a person sees some truly soul-altering shit, he/she doesn't just start cracking wise five minutes later with the threat still present. nothing against good horror wisecracks but once you're down the well in this movie, you are fucked up, and you're going to be fucked up for a long time. nothing here seems to touch anybody, unless it kills them.

but it's also a good bad movie as eliza d. says: a fun watch with a bunch of dumb shit, like all the cheap 80s horror movies I love. And Skarsgard is fucking glorious, every minute he spends onscreen is a gift.

she carries a torch. two torches, actually (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Thursday, 12 September 2019 07:09 (six days ago) link

I am otm but probably too relentlessly sometimes - as a person who will rewatch thinner I am glad some people are enjoying this bad movie 🙂 I can see myself maybe softening on it over time as long as I never have to watch it again

Re the “curious decision” to make Richie the gay one (was trying not to spoil this earlier as it’s a surprising choice that actually works), I strongly suspect either that this was made after casting Hader or that the filmmakers were just big Richie fans - that actor/character is given the only interesting stuff to do p much. One of the more egregious examples of “nothing can matter” is the losers being surprised to see Richie grieve their friend who died horribly minutes before. It’s a good moment for him but shouldn’t those guys give a shit as well?

The mook they got to play hunky Ben = total void

YouGov to see it (wins), Thursday, 12 September 2019 09:57 (six days ago) link


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