Karl, I recommend a walk - preferably with dog.
― kim jong deal (suzy), Sunday, 21 January 2018 21:08 (six years ago) link
last two days have been an episode. nothing big, but good to keep reminding myself it's there, i'm ok, and that doing things i like that make me feel better about myself can't hurt.
― The times they are a changing, perhaps (map), Sunday, 21 January 2018 23:11 (six years ago) link
good attitude map
― kolakube (Ross), Sunday, 21 January 2018 23:13 (six years ago) link
good decision, karl
i have wrestled with that decision myself, so far haven't made the plunge
― the late great, Sunday, 21 January 2018 23:50 (six years ago) link
i'm not trying to complicate things, but would anyone else support the idea of de-indexing this thread? or starting a new one on 77? or just reviving an existing thread on 77 and using it from now on?
― Karl Malone, Sunday, 4 February 2018 18:16 (six years ago) link
Yeah, deindex at least
― drugs don't kill people, poppers do (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 4 February 2018 18:17 (six years ago) link
was managing depression really well the last month, but met a girl recently and despite it feeling like the most natural chemistry in the world, things kinda went south the other night and it's done. now i'm reminded how much worse depression can be when you feel heartbroken, and also reminded why i avoid relationships.
― kolakube (Ross), Sunday, 4 February 2018 19:47 (six years ago) link
Because it burns being broke and it hurts to be heartbroken but always being both must be a drag
― drugs don't kill people, poppers do (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 4 February 2018 19:58 (six years ago) link
I would support a 77 thread. I’m in a really bad place and have been trying to post here for weeks and weeks but keep deleting. Things have reached crisis point in the last two weeks.
― just1n3, Sunday, 4 February 2018 20:52 (six years ago) link
Would def support that, too. This is too much out in the open.
― Le Bateau Ivre, Sunday, 4 February 2018 21:09 (six years ago) link
If we could make a singular depression/anxiety thread too, that would be great
― just1n3, Sunday, 4 February 2018 21:12 (six years ago) link
would it be tasteless to ask to join 77 to follow this though?
― boxedjoy, Sunday, 4 February 2018 21:27 (six years ago) link
nah
― Le Bateau Ivre, Sunday, 4 February 2018 21:34 (six years ago) link
not at all imo. i followed this thread for a while before posting on it, and it helped me through various things.
― Karl Malone, Sunday, 4 February 2018 21:34 (six years ago) link
Boxedjoy you’ve been round long enough - join 77
― just1n3, Sunday, 4 February 2018 21:52 (six years ago) link
sorry you're struggling just1n3
― drugs don't kill people, poppers do (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 4 February 2018 21:55 (six years ago) link
^yeah, same. and ross, too. don't know why i was waiting until the start of a new thread regime on 77 to say that.
― Karl Malone, Sunday, 4 February 2018 21:58 (six years ago) link
https://www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?boardid=77&threadid=106971#unread
― drugs don't kill people, poppers do (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 4 February 2018 22:08 (six years ago) link
Yeah guys, thinking of you and knowing you dont deserve to be going through this shit.
― boxedjoy, Sunday, 4 February 2018 22:52 (six years ago) link
btw, for those of you reading who might not be sure what "77" is, or for people who might see this thread in the future, just request access here:
Request Access to 77 Borad
― Karl Malone, Monday, 5 February 2018 00:59 (six years ago) link
all of my problems bog down to me being unable to accept being disliked by anybody, viewing it as a personal failure. I wasn't like this prior to a few years ago - part of why I got promoted at work is because I was able to be frank and stand firm in the face of any criticism.
Nowadays though even if someone dislikes me for unreasonable reasons, my brain processes it the same way. I find myself doing things I don't want to because I think it will please people, even if I know saying "no" is reasonable.
the alternate theory is that I'm so tired of conflict/emotional stress that it's not that I care about being disliked, but I just desperately want to avoid conflict due to how much of it I experienced at work and with my folks the last few years (re: money).
so I find myself wanting "me" time a lot more than I used to. I used to date anybody who'd give me the time of day, now I look for excuses as to why I shouldn't.
it's not a bad thing, I'm very independent and don't need constant stimulation from other people to be happy, but I don't want to get too closed off either.
part of me thinks I actually need something bad to happen soon just so I can see "hey this didn't kill you", cos with anxiety it's more fearing the myriad of 30452452454254902542 timeline possibilities than reacting to something that really happened.
I also am really worried about my dad, who hasn't been the same since his hospital visit in 2016 for anemia, and may have had a stroke. he's having neurological tests done.
I guess all in all stuff's ok, but just venting.
― fuck the NRA (Neanderthal), Saturday, 24 March 2018 15:01 (six years ago) link
s’what it’s for.
― valorous wokelord (silby), Saturday, 24 March 2018 15:02 (six years ago) link
it's bad today. i have stuff i need to do before tomorrow morning but. i think i'm going to go lie down.
― you bet, nancy (map), Thursday, 31 May 2018 19:01 (five years ago) link
good idea.
btw, if you are on board 77, there's a much more active thread there, linked about five replies above yours. it's a de-indexed thread and much more private.
― A is for (Aimless), Thursday, 31 May 2018 19:12 (five years ago) link
Man Neanderthals post from March is pretty relatable to me. I was popular in school but I’ve always felt the need to be liked which sucks. I have been but that almost makes it an addictive thing although I don’t care if anyone pokes meat work cuz I work with bullies and lame Os
― Ross, Thursday, 31 May 2018 21:41 (five years ago) link
Likes me at work - unfortunate typo
Been drinking way too much - a bottle of spirits a day, or thereabouts. And cutting myself again. It feels like a total regression, but I don't know what I can do about it.
― Leaghaidh am brón an t-anam bochd (dowd), Tuesday, 21 August 2018 18:09 (five years ago) link
Dowd request 77 access perhaps? There is a more private thread there - sucks to hear this, pm me if you want to talk
<3
― Ross, Tuesday, 21 August 2018 18:12 (five years ago) link
Thanks
― Leaghaidh am brón an t-anam bochd (dowd), Tuesday, 21 August 2018 19:33 (five years ago) link
I've been thinking about depression lately - it seems like the key component is the tendency, probably biological, towards negativity and pessimism in thoughts. Also a tendency to remember the bad things in life. Its like one has a filter and all of life seems seen through gray glasses. The way out is to realize this and try to see things more objectively. Usually emotional thinking is extreme and exaggerated where as a more logical thought process is more moderate.
― | (Latham Green), Friday, 5 October 2018 18:39 (five years ago) link
wow, that never occurred to me
― mookieproof, Friday, 5 October 2018 18:42 (five years ago) link
are you being sarcastic?
― | (Latham Green), Friday, 5 October 2018 18:44 (five years ago) link
yes
― mookieproof, Friday, 5 October 2018 18:51 (five years ago) link
Ok - thank you
― | (Latham Green), Friday, 5 October 2018 18:52 (five years ago) link
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Learned_helplessness
― Leon Carrotsky (Noodle Vague), Friday, 5 October 2018 19:15 (five years ago) link
Xps that might work if you’re “feeling blue” but ime clinical depression and anxiety are defined by the inability to be objective.
― just1n3, Friday, 5 October 2018 21:48 (five years ago) link
what depression is really like = 15 years of hanl3y posts
― macropuente (map), Friday, 5 October 2018 22:01 (five years ago) link
I didn't even know what depression was until the other week when I had to show up for a horrible meeting at the Dewsbury Moor Sure Start centre. With a background wall of inspirational quotes from Mumsnet and Jo Cox burning my eyes, just zoning out every time someone apart from me talks and realising my self loathing is bad, these people are bad, everything is bad! But I've got to the point where I know if I had clinical depression - I genuinely would have topped myself by now! So I feel for you ppl with depression, cos life as lived by most is already too many abysmal slaps to the face in series.
― calzino, Friday, 5 October 2018 22:24 (five years ago) link
https://youtu.be/Q4LnpEj1O1Y
― Totally different head. Totally. (Austin), Monday, 29 October 2018 17:09 (five years ago) link
WATCH MENTAL ILLNESS: https://t.co/VvBj0tqPiKSTART TALKING: #mentalillnessbygaa #mentalillnessawareness #therapythroughmusic— Gregory Austin Anderson (@gaustinanderson) October 29, 2018
― Totally different head. Totally. (Austin), Monday, 29 October 2018 20:55 (five years ago) link
https://highline.huffingtonpost.com/articles/en/how-to-help-someone-who-is-suicidal/
― j., Thursday, 15 November 2018 22:23 (five years ago) link
Just a quick check in to say things are alright with me atm - new meds seem to be doing well; it’s only been two months, but I’m feeling more confident. I’ll maybe try going to uni in the nighttime come the new year, assuming things stay level.
― Leaghaidh am brón an t-anam bochd (dowd), Monday, 26 November 2018 13:40 (five years ago) link
good news dowd, pleased to hear it
― sign up for my waterless urinals webinar (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 26 November 2018 13:58 (five years ago) link
really good to hear you're having a better time of it, confidence is the magic stuff
― ogmor, Monday, 26 November 2018 14:13 (five years ago) link
excellent dowd
― xyzzzz__, Monday, 26 November 2018 14:17 (five years ago) link
That's great news!
― fgti is for (flamboyant goon tie included), Monday, 26 November 2018 15:22 (five years ago) link
Brilliant, dowd!
― Totally different head. Totally. (Austin), Monday, 26 November 2018 16:54 (five years ago) link
that's really good news dowd, I'm glad to hear it.
― boxedjoy, Tuesday, 27 November 2018 09:58 (five years ago) link
as a Dowd myself, I'm always pleased to see my online namesake having a win or two!
― calzino, Tuesday, 27 November 2018 10:03 (five years ago) link
Blech - a guy in the pub had some rope, and someone joked that it was for a noose, so he demonstrated different ways of making a noose and I kind of blanched. I had to ask him to stop, and go outside to stop a panic attack. Didn’t expect such a strong reaction. It was super embarassing.
― Leaghaidh am brón an t-anam bochd (dowd), Tuesday, 11 December 2018 13:29 (five years ago) link