Twitter C/D

goofs on that poem are bad, like baby shoes bad

― sonnet by a wite kid, "On Æolian Grief" (wins), Friday, December 1, 2017 2:04 PM (five hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the fuck this was like the only good thing on twitter all week

for some reason i thought it was in reference to this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzRNrS5MPOw

idk maybe people really are uncontrollably guffawing at the 4000th non-variation of (extremely 280 characters voice) "90s meme song lyrics, also plums" and I'm a joyless monster for my only reaction is "oh. Yes. Yes, I see what this is"

we are having all-time storms and flooding, and there have been six tweets about it in the past hour. twitter is decaying.

i like dumb jokes

And you cannot lie
You other brothers can't deny
Cold plums

I deleted twitter off my phone again we’ll see if it sticks.

same here (but for the first time)

D

joyless monsters otm as usual

I made a plum tweet 😜

i forgive you

heh

Ain't I a stinker

white chickens are next, keep it on the hush

Imagine trying to explain “left icebox none plums” to your parents

— Louisa 🌹🍞🌹 (@LouisatheLast) December 1, 2017

ffffuxk

Anyone on Mastodon btw, the hip new open source twitter that is about 1/3 furries but 0/3 brands

I have an acct that I check maybe every few months

every month or two i get a friend request from ello. i haven't unsubscribed out of sheer laziness

idk maybe people really are uncontrollably guffawing at the 4000th non-variation of (extremely 280 characters voice) "90s meme song lyrics, also plums" and I'm a joyless monster for my only reaction is "oh. Yes. Yes, I see what this is"

Yeah, was gonna say, "plums" is basically just Lysol Douche/and here's why/many other threads for twitter.

I don't disagree with that

we totally invented Better Twitter before Twitter existed

I don't disagree either and yet its an improvement on all of them:

My name is cow
Wen I behold
Some fruit get kept
Were it is cold
I gobble up
Wat I find dere
Look on my works
I eat dis pear

Rose is red
Vilits blu
Never gonna
Give up u
Whose woods are dese
Beet beet drums
My sekrit is
I et yr plums

— Al Kennedy (@housetoastonish) December 1, 2017

poetry is stupid

Do not stand at my icebox and weep;
I am not there. I just got eat.

— Sarah_Woolley (@Sarah_Woolley) December 1, 2017

in any context xp

why are you talking like this, did you vote for Trump as well?

I did not vote for
the socialist
who was from
the whitest place in the world

and which
you were probably
hoping
would fix everything

Forgive me
he was so old
so brash
and so fucking dumb

please inlcude plums in there and make it new.

*Lord of the rings guy but instead of potato he says plum*

important to get up early to insult poetry and bernie then reference some nerd shit B-)

this is not
The life
I chose
This is the life
That chose
Me

(Girl
you must be
a plum
because
that ass
is purple fruit
or whatever)

Ii. Get up early ? I cannot sleep

Haunted by #plums

forgive me
for plums contain natural mellowing agents
and I have been so anxious, and so.. full of anxiety

left none plums tweets great

plum tweet haters ain't

guys i've done a little research and read some of the baby shoes tweets and they're bad, sorry

I feel the shit account tour bracket is generally a symptom of horribleness but as an annual way for me to notice and understand the badness of certain tweetspheres it’s illuminating

sadly this year I recognize 2/3rds of the people and.... ok they’re fucking horrible

This sounds like bullshit to me?

PSA. For anyone beset by Nazi and brownshirt bots: I changed my Twitter address to Germany at the suggestion of a shrewd friend, and they vanished. Germany has stricter hate-speech laws.

— Virginia Heffernan (@page88) December 4, 2017

It's a nod to this new law, though obv it's still a reactive thing. Can't imagine her not seeing swastikas etc at all any more.

yet the laws still let her username through!!

Ha!

I think they don't necessarily trust the location you've set, but yeah, if you're "in Germany" it screens out a shitload of accounts that espouse values and symbols banned in Germany

But oh, you'll get so many new bdsm accounts following you.

& Sprockets promos

I'd take both of those over white fascists any day

hell, I'd take them even if I have to deal with the white fascists

My account got a 12 hour suspension for an old tweet quoting Drive Like Jehu lyrics (which accompanied my live video of the band performing said song/lyrics). They made me cough up my phone # (I used a burner #) and then make me brute-force delete the tweet before my 12 hours began counting down.

I searched for the same lyric on twitter and found multiple references, mostly from inactive accounts.

wait...what the hell