Worst Fifth Film In A Series

benji: off the leash! has the best title.

final frontier is pretty bad as star trek movies go but shatner saying "WHAT DOES GOD NEED WITH A STARSHIP?" is better than anything in any of the star wars prequels.

I've only seen a few of these but voted Final Frontier because it was so soul-crushing. Star Trek IV is one of the first movies I remember and my parents took me to see V in the theater and sweet Jesus it was bad.

Rocky v I mean

How is there a Final Destination 5? It's like if they made Weekend at Bernie's 5.

Also there are apparently EIGHT American Pie films.

Attack of the Clones is an absurd thing. But those Pirates.. movies are the most joyless examples of CGI battle overload you couldn't possibly care about - there's no so-bad-it's-funny element like in AOTC, its too blandly joyless. I haven't seen Dead Men Tell No Tales but tempted to vote for it either way.

this reminds me i need to watch Muppet Treasure Island

― AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 10 November 2017 14:59 (five hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

never understood the widespread disdain for this film, it's so so funny

I'll also go to bat for Muppet Treasure Island. Haven't seen out in a while, but I worked in a video store where we had to watch children's movies all day and I remember it being among the better ones we had in our rotation.

I've never been into Star Wars but my son likes it so have now sat through all 8 films and those three prequels are just unsalvagable garbage, cannot remember anything about attack of the clones beyond the chase scene at the start and the painfully awkward romance scenes, it may get my vote

Attack of the Clones was even worse than Phantom Menace imo. Voting for that.

sand

it gets everywhere!

Are the Hobbit films ineligible? I suppose they're a separate series to LOTR.

this is attack of the clones vs terminator genisys for me

gonna go with genisys because although every frame of aotc is utter shit, genisys starts with a potentially interesting premise and then proceeds to make the worst imaginable story decisions at every turn - that little glimpse of hope in the first ten minutes or so makes the remaining two hours feel so much worse

Funny how I thought "Attack of the Clones" was not bad when i first saw it, compared to "Phantom Menace". I rewatched the prequels a few years back and at least "Phantom Menace" tries to be fun (and at times succeeds). I'd watch it over AotC any day

Anyway, haven't seen most of these movies but can't imagine anything is worse than Trek 5

how about anything w/ that massive bore Captain Picard?

how dare u

jean-luc picard is a saint

he defeated the borgs!

I downloaded a fan edit of the SW prequels compressed into a single movie with as little Annie and Jar Jar as possible, and it's very enjoyable.

I haven't seen any of the individual prequels since I saw them in the theater, so I really can't judge them fairly.

I can, however, judge Morbs and his very wrong opinions about Picard. Shame on you, sir.

His Star Wars was the best Star Wars.

police academy 5 was a big letdown after all-time series high police academy 4: citizens on patrol

i mean maybe it's good on its own terms but i find it very hard to approach without comparing the two

I very tentatively started rewatching the Police Academy series a few years back and was surprised to find that the first two were actually decent and occasionally funny. That was all over by the third one, though.

I've seen very, very few of these.

I thought Attack of the Clones was far worse than Phantom Menace: after PM didn't provide much more than a basis, I expected Clones to deliver with story progress but it hardly did. I saw the film only once, back then in the cinema, but I've never had any interest in seeing it again. I remember that most of the movie's attention went to the romantic & emotional problems of Anakin Skywalker, as performed by someone who couldn't act.

I've seen the fifth Potter, which was a massive step down from the fourth IMO.

X-Men First Class was pretty great I thought, even if the villains weren't grand.

Seen Bond & pretty sure I've seen all Police Academy movies, I think that's it.

Of the few I know, Clones is definitely the worst.

special shout-out for superman returns, which manages to capture enough of the charm of richard donner's superman movies to make it even more of a slap in the face when our hero is revealed as both a deadbeat dad and a creepy weirdo using his x-ray vision to spy on his ex

Also each of Superman's challenges simply involves lifting a heavier thing than the last one iirc.

Skipped almost all of these.

GOOD
Final Destination 5
Seed of Chucky

MEH
Muppet Treasure Island
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child
Prometheus
Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones
X-Men: First Class

BAD
Benji: Off the Leash!
Friday the 13th: A New Beginning
A Good Day To Die Hard
Ice Age: Collision Course
Vacation

UGLY
Star Trek V: The Final Frontier

i love that you skipped almost all of these but still found the time to screen benji: off the leash!

That was on assignment.

Most of those were on assignment.

tbh i prefer my initial assumption that you were a die-hard benji fan who was bitterly disappointed by his fifth cinematic outing

tbh, I prefer that assumption too

"fans used to spend hours in contentious speculation over what benji would be like taken off his leash. well, now the question is answered, but was THIS what we waited seventeen years for? five films and three decades in, it's clear Camp has lost his passion for the series"

and yes - all five theatrical benji films were directed by the same guy! the forthcoming reboot will be helmed by his son if I understand correctly. that's nice.

genisys starts with a potentially interesting premise and then proceeds to make the worst imaginable story decisions at every turn - that little glimpse of hope in the first ten minutes or so makes the remaining two hours feel so much worse

otm. it's my vote here bc of how i felt increasingly insulted over the course of two hours

all final frontier haters:

http://www.millionaireplayboy.com/mpb/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/good_trekv_04.jpg

how about anything w/ that massive bore Captain Picard?

― ice cream social justice (Dr Morbius), Friday, November 10, 2017 5:33 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i'm with morbs here, the mediocre-to-shitty tng movies are significantly worse than final frontier to me, which at least has stupid shit happening constantly

final frontier also has that excellent scene where sybock breaks down the mental barriers of the whole crew

so many choices.

Went for the Die Hard disaster, because I enjoyed all the previous ones (yes I liked the fourth one)

First Contact > Generations > Final Frontier > Nemesis > Insurrection

Also Attack of the Clones is good and you are all crazy.

breathtaking switch from otm to v def notm from phil d's last two posts there

otm

though tbh basically everything below 'first contact' in that list is equally bad in a slightly different way. final frontier and insurrection maybe the most similar, for feeling really cheap and lazy and flat and boring.

Phantom Menace is worse than Clones is worse than not bothering to see Sith.

though tbh basically everything below 'first contact' in that list is equally bad in a slightly different way. final frontier and insurrection maybe the most similar, for feeling really cheap and lazy and flat and boring.

one kinda unique thing about the pre-reboot trek movies, variable in quality though they undoubtedly are, is that no matter how shitty they might be it's still at least a little bit fun to check in with the cast and see what their characters have been up to

that being said, i'd chew glass before watching insurrection again

as before i suspect the worst is probably one i haven't seen, like the die hard or terminator ones (whose trailer just bummed me out endlessly, given how much i love the first one). or probably Saw V (I've only seen long portions of Saw III and they really really bothered me). or the animated ones, whose whole series are really ugly and dreary from what i've seen and god knows how bereft they would be by the fifth installments.

wikipedia can't make up its mind about the pink panther numbering btw. some seem to think this isn't "really" the fifth one since Inspector Clouseau (1968) is missing all the major players. by this count, #5 is revenge of the pink panther and #6 is trail of the pink panther which is built around flashbacks of things peter sellers did in older films, since he was dead. that sounds like a real winner.

those that i've seen:

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: serviceable, might accept case that it's the weakest in the series but these are all at least pretty good. main problems are inherited from the book, with the central plot driven, irritatingly, by harry's refusal to take anti-mind-control class seriously. fred & george vs. umbridge was fun IIRC.

Muppet Treasure Island: pleasant as noted upthread.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales: cannot imagine watching any more of these after #3. somewhere on the Blank Check podcast, david sims cracked me up by observing the mentality apparently driving these sequels: "because that's what people like about the first one, right? a bunch of pirates turning into things? ... they're always sailing off to the goddamned indian ocean and turning into barnacles or something!" the prospect of bardem and depp trying to out-ham each other fills me with dread.

Prometheus: horrendously dumb and insulting but with occasionally beautiful visuals. the opening scenes with fassbender permit one the possibility of imagining something much more interesting. on the other hand all the goals and content of the plot are infuriating.

Star Trek V: The Final Frontier: dreary, tedious, characters are morons, effects look like hell. i admit that as a kid i felt some sense of drama and suspense when they arrived on the planet where they're expecting to find God. but this is easily in the bottom 2-3 of the entire series.

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones: worse than Phantom Menace, nearly unwatchably ugly and tone-deaf. but almost worth it for the lols over the years. it was cool seeing christopher lee even if his character sucked.

Superman Returns: in hindsight i appreciate the desire to maintain and update the christopher reeve take, versus what they've chosen to do since. a small number of scenes work, and the airplane save is one of the best superhero scenes of the decade and genuinely got me excited and goosebumpy for that good old superman feeling. otherwise though a slowwwwww and wince-inducing failure.

You Only Live Twice: racist, too long, boring. only memorable (and not awful) thing is ken adam's design for the evil headquarters, which is possibly his masterpiece.

X-Men: First Class: this was fun IMHO despite some cheaping-out on the forgettable evil mutants and the terrible handling of Emma Frost, a fantastic character who could have become a series icon if written intelligently. the period setting and fanservice/prequelly stuff was
generally cute rather than annoying (except "I was wrong, you're not a nerd... you're a BEAST!!" or whatever). central performances are great. fassbender should be in every fifth movie in a series.

voting star trek. clones is probably objectively worse but i only had myself to blame for going back to the theater after the first one.

the only ones of these I've seen are:

Fast Five: where I came in to the series, and better than any of the others I've watched since [part of 1, part of 2, all of 3 because a cat was sitting on me, 6 and 7 in the cinema. am off the bus until Lin returns.]

Star Trek V: even as a kid this was weak gruel but Spock's flying boots ruled

You Only Live Twice: some cool set pieces, disappointed kid-me for ditching all the plot and themes of the novel

saw a large bit of Seed Of Chucky on TV once, seemed like it was probably great

btw Doc Casino: Fully Loaded is the SIXTH Herbie film - it's no less of a reboot or remake than the Peyton Reed / Bruce Campbell TV version.

TV and VHS entries don't count towards numbering... otherwise i'd be including all those series that became direct-to-video after the second or third movie.

I was

o_O

"Sean Bean, one of the best femme fatales" needs to be somebody's username

That Attack Of The Clones clip is actually the edited version that Lucas released on DVD to make that scene less goofy - I can't find a clip of the theatrical version but her "uh-huh" there is instead a perky "yes!"

I was born in 79 and the Brosnan films are precisely why I never got into Bond

"Gather what troops you can, we've got to get to that hangar!"

iirc, Padme also has no reason to know that Dooku was going to a hangar

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

I cannot argue.

poll: how many of these fifth films in a series were you aware existed

i count thirty

monster

very accurate results

I don't hate Genisys, it was stupid action fun. way better than salvation.

that is a very low bar imo

Genisys was only slightly more tolerable than a prostate exam

prostate exam is all over in a couple of minutes so no

With genisys it didn't even matter who you were there with so no

Assuming the one vote for Seed of Chucky was a misunderstanding of the poll topic.

at first I thought this was the Die Hard with my boy Olyphant in it and I was briefly incensed

http://www.benji.com/JoeCamp/ImagesJoe/B&Me-web.jpg

a friend of mine is reading this as research for a "you must remember this" style podcast on Benji. can't wait to hear the real dirt on the troubled shoot for benji: off the leash!

Benji was a total coked-out diva on the set, iirc.

"Oh, Heavenly Dog!" or get out.

omg it got its own thread: Benji: Off the Leash!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NooW_RbfdWI

this is shaping up to look like it coulda been a contender imo

more stuff that was in the crazy sayles script iirc

based on reviews, JURASSIC WORLD: FALLEN KINGDOM seems as if it could either have been a contender in this thread, or a classic case of "the previous one was so bad that nobody even cared that this was worse"

Wow, I figured improving on the last one would've been the easiest thing in the (movie-related) world. Guess trying is still hard.

Worst Sixth Film In A Series