Joe Suck & Dim Tim: The FOX SPORTS IS SATAN thread

this inspires me to try to get to work on the most pointless baseball-related supercut of all time, though. in the 8th inning of just about every cardinals broadcast, dan mclaughlin reads out the attendance figures for the game in the same exact way, saying the total, and then reading out each digit, one at a time, e.g., "Forty-Two Thousand, Seven Hundred Thirty-One... 4 - 2 - 7 - 3 - 1". i've always wanted to isolate just the "4 - 2 - 7 - 3 - 1" part of that from each game so that he'd be reading out digits for thirty minutes straight with ambient baseball crowd noise in the background.

i'm glad it inspired you

while the other networks are showing reruns, you'll experience the passion, magic, and the mystery of ROAR. an epic new series premiering this monday 9 eastern, 8 central on FOX.

i remember seeing the promos for arrested development and thinking 'that looks stupid'

and you were right!

so that he'd be reading out digits for thirty minutes straight

This would sound like those infamous radio "numbers stations" of the Cold War.

nah it was p. good

xp or ned raggett reading the digits of pi

do it KM

joe buck is singing 'candyman' right now, occasionally substituting 'grandyman'

don't really care about the 'redemption' narrative, but this is good

https://www.theringer.com/mlb/2017/10/25/16539596/alex-rodriguez-redemption-mlb-on-fox-world-series

Schmoo: We heard Smoltz talk about establishing the fastball, something McCullers obviously didn’t do in his crazy curveball outing. Do you think Hill actually needs to “establish the fastball”?

Jeff Sullivan: That expression doesn’t mean anything

lmao

https://i.imgur.com/GJlPoao.jpg

http://www.sportsmediawatch.com/2018/05/joe-buck-mlb-tnf-riddick-rowe-helwani/

JOE BUCK TO SKIP TNF IF MLB POSTSEASON CONFLICTS

Fox Sports play-by-play voice Joe Buck, who is set to work an unprecedented schedule this fall that includes the NLCS, World Series and Thursday Night Football, will prioritize baseball over TNF if the events conflict. Buck told the St. Louis Post-Dispatch that if any of his baseball assignments are postponed to a Thursday night, he will skip TNF.

Even if all goes according to schedule, Buck’s fall schedule will be unusually hectic. During the World Series, he will potentially work nine nights out of ten in four different cities. As has been the case for most of his career, Buck will not work Sunday NFL games during the postseason.

worst timeline iirc

Buck’s fall schedule will be unusually hectic

kenny albert scoffs

Jessica Mendoza said that when she saw Smoltz at Fenway on Saturday and told him she was headed to address the Saberseminar, his reaction was BLAUUUGH HOW COULD YOU

The Case For Joe Buck

pretty much agree with this tbh. we could (and usually do) do a great deal worse

my local paper runs a "why do people hate Joe Buck so much?" column every year. It's weird. I never really had a problem with him.

Feel like that article was written by a reputation management AI

Those calls from last year's WS are actually great examples of everything that's wrong with his announcing -- every big call goes something like this: "HOME RUN! (PLAYER'S NAME)! (SCORE OF GAME)!" with hard pauses after each exclamation. He never embellishes, never follows up these calls with interesting phraseology, nothing. Great announcing should be more than just yelling when the crowd is yelling.

He's not a horrible announcer by any means, but he adds nothing to the games for me. He also has a far more intuitive feel for the ebbs and flows of football.

Where's that Joe Buck?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=maTiGsNeHR0

I watched a chunk of the Foxcast archive this morning to catch up on what I missed after I fell asleep in the 6th (this will happen most nights). The first thing about Buck's pedestrian-at-best style is he almost never tells me anything (useful) I didn't know already. Really, all that "access" and you can't manage that?

But fuckin' Smoltz is even worse. Mid-game he said something about the evening had been ripe with "action and execution." He also works endless variations on "these teams are good."

baseball's kind of a weird sport to announce. 54 outs, maybe 10-15 hits/walks over a 2.5 hour broadcast (minus commercials) = something happening every 2 minutes. so there's a lot of dead space to fill. it's kind of a unique skill that very few people seem to possess. how many announcers can emulate what Bob Uecker does?

from last night's FG chat:

5 Run Homer:
Did Joe Buck just call steal a base steal a taco a “rich tradition”?

Jay Jaffe:
It made him richer.

Dan Szymborski:
Steal a base, steal a taco seems to be the part of baseball that Buck is the most interested in and the part for which he can give the most detailed explanation.

AdamZ:
Joe Buck: something something launch angle. John Smoltz: has aneurysm.

baseball's kind of a weird sport to announce. 54 outs, maybe 10-15 hits/walks over a 2.5 hour broadcast (minus commercials) = something happening every 2 minutes. so there's a lot of dead space to fill. it's kind of a unique skill that very few people seem to possess. how many announcers can emulate what Bob Uecker does?

― frogbs, Wednesday, October 24, 2018 7:43 AM (three hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i mean to be honest while it's a skill very few people possess, i think enough possess it that Joe Buck's mediocrity shouldn't be tolerated. as a Cubs fan i compare Joe Buck's lifeless call of the final out of the 2016 world series vs Matt Vasgersian's call of Bote's walkoff grand slam vs the Nats a couple months back. Buck is a generic pro announcer, he's basically the Tom Bergeron of play by play dudes, Vasgersian is a pro. And I don't even really think Vasgersian is really *great* as much as he gets into it.

disagree -- vasgersian sucks imo. he has the voice for it, but a) he's a dick, and b) i'd rather have a subdued buck than a guy who ramps up the fake excitement for routine fly balls

at least we were spared ernie johnson this year (not that i want him to have health problems)

i just can't deal with Joe Buck's strained efforts at caring, the energy he brings is at the same level as if he was moderately interested in the fact Men's Wearhouse is having a big weekend sale.

Smoltz is much worse than Buck these days, which is weird because I don't remember disliking him on TBS.

smoltz fucking blows

i can't stand people who are vehemently anti-intellectual about fucking BASEBALL

annoyingly laid out, but accurate: https://www.dodgerthoughts.com/2018/10/24/thoughts-about-john-smoltz-in-five-parts

(caveat: anyone who writes Whenever a manager or a front office or an owner puts a team on the field in a baseball game, the goal is to win. obviously doesn't watch many pirates or marlins games)

Joe Buck last night let us know the number of intentional walks handed to the Red Sox in the first game of the world series. That number? At time of writing it stands at 2.

FG chat again:

Mike:

Joe buck continues to believe that the team with the highest walk rate, lowest swing rate and highest pitches per pa in MLB are an aggressive bunch of hackers because they hit 235 home runs.

@EricFisherSBJ
MLB and Fox Sports, as expected, announce a multiyear rights extension that will keep the World Series, All-Star Game, and ~half of the playoffs on Fox networks. Starting in '22, more games on Fox broadcast network. Deal also has expanded streaming, highlight and social rights

@EricFisherSBJ
Industry sources say MLB’s new rights deal w Fox Sports is a 7-yr deal covering the 2022-28 seasons and is worth about $5.1B, about a 50 percent bump from the current term.

@EricFisherSBJ
Also expect Joe Buck and John Smoltz to be a part of Fox MLB coverage as long as they want to. With regard to Buck particularly, Shanks said, "I can't imagine Fox baseball without Joe Buck."

failures of imagination by powerful men are what got us to this hell world

“How do you change the narrative?” There is no narrative. They’re the players, John. They play the game and are judged by the score.

— Joe Sheehan (@joe_sheehan) October 18, 2019

AP:

Fox will be taking viewers out to the ballgame by adding a virtual crowd in parks during its baseball telecasts this season.

The network revealed on Thursday that it will include computer-generated fans in the stands beginning with their three games on Saturday. Fox begins its coverage with Milwaukee at the Chicago Cubs, followed by San Francisco at Los Angeles Dodgers, and concluding with the New York Yankees at Washington.

Simulacra and Simulation

joe buck leaving fox for espn!

i’m sure it’s for an incredible amount of money but i’m still surprised