rolling nyc subway ads discussion thread

why are so many subway ads/billboards about EJACULATE now?

casper mattresses and the seediness of internet commerce

https://www.fastcompany.com/3065928/sleepopolis-casper-bloggers-lawsuits-underside-of-the-mattress-wars

spotted along the G train pic.twitter.com/sMo0luf2j1

— lαrissα phαm (@lrsphm) November 4, 2017

ha!

lol, that's the snowman ad moved over. i like it when people do the juxtaposition box cutter trick

can't remember whether it's seamless or grubhub or bleepblorp but whoever has the "quirky" "hilarious" "that's so me" versions of special instructions added to orders... GAH. it's impossible not to picture the poor working stiffs at the restaurant getting these obnoxious AF requests showing up on the line and having to weigh the chance that the person actually expects this nonsense and will give them a shitty yelp review otherwise.

the one where the delivery guy is instructed to hassle the people on the next floor down for stealing their wifi = omg fuck off

nothing is as bad as fiverr

yeah fiverr kind of uniquely encapsulates an entire hateful awful mindset, in all its vast opinion of itself

meanwhile, the goony group photo of Big Bang Theory has returned to bother us all

hm... testing something, don't mind me

fiverr has not only the most nauseating message but manages to find uniquely punchable faces to match

http://mikekosk.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/fiverr_poster.jpg

THIS. FUCKING. GUY.

I'd live to trap the Fiverr models (and board) with Edward Woodward at the end of The Wicker Man

guys i learned about the NY state family leave thing from subway ads and now i get like a whole extra month of paternity leave. the rare case of subway ads gone right.

the other of course being the school of practical philosophy, which changed my life.

I bought a Casper mattress

well I saw something and said something so

i ate a snickers

i used the NYC transit promo code when i bought the mattress

i got my breasts enlarged

I also bought a Casper mattress, but haven't taken it out of the box yet. Maybe Friday.

I bought some thinx to clean up egg spills, but they didn't really seem as ideally designed for that as advertised

fuck, if Morbs bought a Casper then they truly have won.

the okcupid "DTF" ones are individually quite stupid and faux-with-it (ah yes, the cool leftie kids are totally down to flirtily thumb-wrestle trump voters!) but i was on a car that had an uninterrupted frieze of them running the full length, and it's kind of great because each individual ad is split into two panels (wacky photo, caption) and since there's no additional border at the edge of an ad, it's very easy to read an image as being paired with the next caption over. hijinks ensue.

e.g. these, though i bet the side-by-side thing won't happen once i hit post:

https://i2.wp.com/www.ifitshipitshere.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/E_okc_dtf_hero7.jpg?resize=800%2C518https://i0.wp.com/www.ifitshipitshere.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/D_okc_dtf_hero10.jpg?resize=800%2C518

i giggle each time i see the ones for the show BILLIONS, but only because the first one i saw was the one with the blonde woman holding some grapes, and someone had defaced it with a speech balloon reading

I used some of my billions to buy these grapes!

BILLIONS!

Twee Seamless delivery instructions are more than just unfunny. They represent the petty demands of a privileged class that sits atop our neo-feudal order.https://t.co/PTrflFsuPj

— The Baffler (@thebafflermag) August 16, 2018

Mainly they're unfunny though

yes to both points. fuck them.

the lyft adds hyping up long-established NYC destinations have been my main source of fury lately, though. you know what's a great way to get to the Cloisters or Rockaway Beach? THE FUCKING PUBLIC TRANSIT NETWORK YOU'RE STANDING IN, LOOKING AT THIS AD. kind of amazing they approve ads that are that nakedly like "fuck the subway." granted, cuomo's MTA is sliding towards disaster but i'm pretty sure a 90-minute cab ride is not going to compete with a $2.75 or less subway fare.

https://i.imgur.com/aBIuqEQ.jpg

I like the detailed cartoon ads, they work well for avoiding looking at other people

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DlTpNtaVAAEACUb.jpg:small

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DluDGahUcAAQsBA.jpg

Lucas bides his time. Lucas lets John believe he has won.

https://i.imgur.com/eOSL1YY.jpg

GrubHub is back on the "what up, fellow New Yorkers?" kick, with slogans like "When you're craving cake so badly, you'd crash a Central Park wedding to get it."

Also, I hate how every dumb campaign like this now has twenty variations of the same concept/joke plastered all over the same car. I know that's been a thing since at least the days of creepy Venmo Lucas, but it's just so dispiriting. Today's Zizmors stand no chance.