Bartender Best Practices

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10. The hours advertised as "Happy" as listed on the placard outside the bar are subject to change depending on when a certain number of customers come in.

calstars, Sunday, 27 August 2017 16:06 (six years ago) link

one month passes...

NYTimes article "how to get and keep a bartender's attention" contains this nugget :
"In the event of a free drink, tip for its full price"

calstars, Thursday, 5 October 2017 15:40 (six years ago) link

three months pass...

Never ask a customer’s name. But be ready to provide yours.

calstars, Saturday, 6 January 2018 15:47 (six years ago) link

that's....weird.

fuck you, your hat is horrible (Neanderthal), Saturday, 6 January 2018 15:52 (six years ago) link

like...why shouldn't they ask

fuck you, your hat is horrible (Neanderthal), Saturday, 6 January 2018 15:52 (six years ago) link

Horniness on the part of the customer (tinder/AM?)

YouTube_-_funy_cats.flv (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Saturday, 6 January 2018 17:15 (six years ago) link

the bartender is going to learn your name anyway when you give them your credit card. and your last name.

fuck you, your hat is horrible (Neanderthal), Saturday, 6 January 2018 17:16 (six years ago) link

More accurately: never ask a customer’s name unless they ask yours.

calstars, Saturday, 6 January 2018 17:35 (six years ago) link

Yeah, that is creepy if a bartender asks/uses your name. I feel like some super heavy touristy places do that to milk tips from tourists assuming all of NYC is rude.

Yerac, Saturday, 6 January 2018 17:49 (six years ago) link

The names thing works differently in different places. Big/busy/heavily staffed bars may have different reasons to give and ask for names than a cozy local does.

Bartender to patron: "My name's Kate if you need anything." Okay, maybe this is a management directive intended to make things more personable.

I don't relish it but I also don't mind it, and can see situations where it sometimes makes things easier for when you want something. One can now say "Kate" instead of "Excuse me" or "Miss" (which, ugh) or "Hey Barkeep," or maybe helps avoid "Yo, sugar tits!" And using words is preferable to waiting to catch the eye of a busy bartender, or doing the pathetic raised finger thing.

Also can be handy to know which person is "your" bartender in case checks/tips are being handled separately in that establishment. Sometimes there are non-bartenders behind the bar, and you might be asking a waitron, or a kid who's just refilling the ice.

"My name's Trevor, what's yours?" is a different vibe. Again, it's not necessarily ideal but it's probably not the bartender's fault; they are instructed to ask. I can see why it would be helpful in some places. Some people are running a tab, some people are paying as they go, some are using cash, some are using cards. Some people are sitting still on a stool and others are moving around the bar. Easiest to just get a first name to keep track of each patron.

Maybe their computer requires a name for each order. I have sometimes looked at my check and seen something like "glasses guy."

In some places having my name allows them to ostentatiously show that they remember it, and the associated drink. "Another Maker's Mark, Patrick?" I don't usually mind, unless I am in a grumpy "leave me alone and keep the booze coming" mode. And when in that mode I generally choose a bar conducive to it.

Another wrinkle is if one intends to become a regular. Names come in handy then.

failsun ra (Ye Mad Puffin), Sunday, 7 January 2018 11:16 (six years ago) link

i want to give my opinion on this, having worked as a bartender
if there is some connection or the person probably wants you to use their name in the future 99% of the time, they will at some point say: "hey, i'm katie" or something similar.
definitely never ask.

XxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxXxxxx (dylannn), Sunday, 7 January 2018 20:09 (six years ago) link

not really required and i stopped doing this at some point when my memory for regulars got better but i would make a note in my notebook with a few details about katie (drink notes, GLASSES, AUSTRALIAN, JW ANDERSON JACKET) (without her name, i would still add the notes with description) and when she comes in again and orders her drink, i can if necessary discreetly flip open to my notebook. 2ND time she comes back: "it was katie, right?" + maybe some followup on our last conversation: "how did that work trip go, to... boston?" if no pushback, next times: use name. if they never gave their name, do not attempt to do callbacks to earlier conversations as they probably aren't into that, unless they follow up on previous conversations themselves.

XxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxXxxxx (dylannn), Sunday, 7 January 2018 20:13 (six years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7U3lo80YrQ

failsun ra (Ye Mad Puffin), Sunday, 7 January 2018 20:18 (six years ago) link

I only go to bars where everyone wears name tags.

Jeff, Sunday, 7 January 2018 20:31 (six years ago) link

I wear a name tag whenever I go to a bar

Choco Blavatsky (seandalai), Sunday, 7 January 2018 20:34 (six years ago) link

I have a couple places where my wife and I are regulars, I know all the bartenders' named and they know ours, but none of us ever use them.

Monster fatberg (Phil D.), Sunday, 7 January 2018 20:36 (six years ago) link

Just in case there’s a customer enamored with you (yeah but no), never invite your SO to the bar

June Pointer’s Valentine’s Day Secret Admirer Note Author (calstars), Friday, 12 January 2018 22:19 (six years ago) link

six months pass...

When an old regular comes in after a hiatus, buy the first round. Or the third.

calstars, Monday, 23 July 2018 20:13 (five years ago) link

two weeks pass...

- Establish a first name basis ASAP
- emphasize in conversation what you have in common with the barfly
- give equal facetime to everyone at the bar

calstars, Sunday, 12 August 2018 02:51 (five years ago) link

- Establish a first name basis ASAP

erm...

Never ask a customer’s name. But be ready to provide yours.

― calstars, Saturday, January 6, 2018 10:47 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

fuck the NRA (Neanderthal), Sunday, 12 August 2018 03:30 (five years ago) link

there are ways to solicit information without asking

providing your own name, or making enough small talk that someone gives their name works well

if you've made enough small talk, you can give your name again like "hey, I'm Travis, I work here wednesdays and saturdays, it's been nice talking to you"

if they don't introduce themselves at that point you've failed rapport

mh, Sunday, 12 August 2018 03:47 (five years ago) link

never visibly react negatively to something the customer says in a neutral or positive way, unless you have a good rapport and it's part of a real conversation

for instance, if you see someone who was a longtime regular and he says "hey, I'm gonna have a kid!" do not mumble "jesus christ" and wander off disgustedly

mh, Sunday, 12 August 2018 03:50 (five years ago) link

"my wife just died"

"oh, congratulations!!!"

fuck the NRA (Neanderthal), Sunday, 12 August 2018 03:55 (five years ago) link

I have a lot of "don'ts" from a longtime bartender around town but I won't do them all at once

the best part was that he had (has?) a blog where he recounted stories and in half of them he seems horrible. and it's not a shtick, he really does act like that

mh, Sunday, 12 August 2018 04:00 (five years ago) link

I personally don't love it when bartender asks for my name.

Some qualifiers, though. I might make an exception when it's done _instead_ of swiping or keeping a credit card. That seems kind of homey and nice and trusting.

In most places, they have to put _something_ in the system to keep tabs separate. I'd rather have the check say "Patrick" than "weird guy at end of bar."

Your momma is so ethically praiseworthy (Ye Mad Puffin), Sunday, 12 August 2018 12:39 (five years ago) link

Yeah sometimes it’s a good idea to ask (from the bartender’s POV) and sometimes not. Wrote that yesterday though when I was getting along well with a new bartender and her giving her name and asking mine probably swayed toward having another round there

calstars, Sunday, 12 August 2018 18:09 (five years ago) link

I hasten to note that in a lot of places it's probably not the bartender's choice, but rather his or her manager.

I don't think my local barkeep is personally thinking "Wow, that enigmatic yet weirdly handsome guy with the glasses who does advanced crossword puzzles while getting sloshed alone is extremely compelling. How I wish I knew his name!"

More likely the decree comes down from management or corporate, saying "EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY, ALL BAR STAFF WILL INTRODUCE THEMSELVES, SHAKE HANDS, AND ASK THE PATRON'S NAME."

leica bridge over troubled cameras (Ye Mad Puffin), Sunday, 12 August 2018 18:15 (five years ago) link

Like Barbershop

fuck the NRA (Neanderthal), Sunday, 12 August 2018 19:23 (five years ago) link

six months pass...

If there’s a group sitting at a table, instead of waiting for them to order rounds at bar, clear their empties and take the next orders. Keep them drinking.

calstars, Wednesday, 20 February 2019 23:14 (five years ago) link

five months pass...

So these vertical IDs for minors these days, c or d

calstars, Saturday, 20 July 2019 19:22 (four years ago) link

makes sense

alomar lines, Saturday, 20 July 2019 20:36 (four years ago) link

When you run out of music to play, put on Mothership Connection

calstars, Friday, 2 August 2019 01:36 (four years ago) link

one month passes...

Serve a group before a single

calstars, Saturday, 28 September 2019 02:59 (four years ago) link

A cig is the perfect break

calstars, Sunday, 29 September 2019 00:39 (four years ago) link

three weeks pass...

When serving, if possible, set the glass down on the bar with an audible “pop.” This augments the overall auditory experience of the customer and is a reminder of the impending rush of pleasure, potentially leading to a larger tip

calstars, Sunday, 20 October 2019 01:35 (four years ago) link

calma starstra

Tart Prepper (Sufjan Grafton), Sunday, 20 October 2019 02:18 (four years ago) link

"What's your name?" should only follow "Wanna start a tab?"

pplains, Sunday, 20 October 2019 02:37 (four years ago) link

two weeks pass...

If you sense a new patron is impatient or irritable, take his payment when you take his order. That will dissuade him from bolting while you’re pouring or otherwise engaged, leaving you one down on the count.

June Pointer’s Valentine’s Day Secret Admirer Note Author (calstars), Sunday, 3 November 2019 18:47 (four years ago) link

four weeks pass...

How garrulous to be ? Pluses and minuses on both sides. I think overall if you’re talkative and boisterous it’s to the benefit of the bottom line

calstars, Sunday, 1 December 2019 03:44 (four years ago) link

When you run out of music to play, put on Mothership Connection


Human Being Best Practices

brimstead, Sunday, 1 December 2019 05:21 (four years ago) link

Well alright!

calstars, Sunday, 1 December 2019 14:30 (four years ago) link

according to this thread, bars in the US are so far removed from the UK the experience is unrecognisable

YOU CALL THIS JOURNALSIM? (dog latin), Monday, 2 December 2019 19:27 (four years ago) link

American drinking culture is pretty shit

brimstead, Monday, 2 December 2019 19:56 (four years ago) link

How so?

pomenitul, Monday, 2 December 2019 19:58 (four years ago) link

calstars is a sui generis bar-room oddball

#FBPIRA (jim in vancouver), Monday, 2 December 2019 19:58 (four years ago) link

I never go to the clubbier/packed bars in my area but ended up in one for a friend's birthday. I couldn't quite hear what the upgrade was when I ordered a round (two beers, two mixed drinks) but for $1 per drink, I figured whatever it was would be fine, so I nodded.

It turned out it was "your second drink is a dollar" and I was presented with eight drinks. I tipped $4, which seems... fine?

mh, Monday, 2 December 2019 20:13 (four years ago) link

I also quickly figured out why I've seen so many people incoherently stumbling out of that place at relatively early hours

mh, Monday, 2 December 2019 20:14 (four years ago) link

wow

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 2 December 2019 20:17 (four years ago) link

wow x2

in Oregon they have a rule about how much actual alcohol you can order at once, e.g. you can't get a 2 oz bourbon sampler plus a full pint of beer, gotta dial that beer down to a beer back order.

sleeve, Monday, 2 December 2019 20:19 (four years ago) link

This more a tip for bar owners, but if your establishment brands its own glasses with its name or logo, instruct the servers to serve the customers with the name on the glass facing them. This will augment brand / establishment exposure in case the customer takes a photo and posts it on their MyFace

calstars, Monday, 10 May 2021 00:05 (two years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Never tell customers the tip is included

calstars, Saturday, 29 May 2021 18:12 (two years ago) link

four weeks pass...

In the summer, set up a water station on the side, so patrons can serve themselves

calstars, Saturday, 26 June 2021 22:45 (two years ago) link

three weeks pass...

When you have a customer that leaves borromean condensation rings in their wake, assume they’re a pro

calstars, Saturday, 17 July 2021 23:47 (two years ago) link

Diarrhea

making splashes at Dan Flashes (Neanderthal), Sunday, 18 July 2021 00:29 (two years ago) link

Aim for an inch of foam on draft beer orders. Assuming you own the place

calstars, Sunday, 25 July 2021 02:45 (two years ago) link

two months pass...

File under bar owner best practices:
Regarding the selection of an initial seating arrangement during construction or renovation, eschew chairs with backs. Instead, choose benches or bar stools to prevent the customer from getting too comfortable — an uncomfortable customer is one eager for a drink. An adjunct benefit to this arrangement is that it discourages extended lingering.

calstars, Thursday, 14 October 2021 16:46 (two years ago) link

When it’s time for another round for the group, be direct and ask the alpha first. They are the most likely to order another, and chances are the others will follow suit. In any case, do not ask the group as a unit (“can I get anyone here another?”) which makes it easier for all to decline and not be identified singularly as the buzzkill.

calstars, Saturday, 23 October 2021 17:31 (two years ago) link

one month passes...

If a barfly asks your name it’s a fair bet to assume they want to be remembered by theirs

calstars, Saturday, 27 November 2021 22:19 (two years ago) link

one month passes...

If a customer says “thank you so much” or is otherwise overly verbally gratuitous, you can probably safely tack on a couple extra bills to the bill

calstars, Saturday, 15 January 2022 19:08 (two years ago) link

If your establishment doesn’t serve food but is takeout-friendly, keep a leather- or otherwise nicely bound book of delivery menus handy to keep the customers in-house

calstars, Saturday, 15 January 2022 19:10 (two years ago) link

A friendly bartender showed me this beautiful old book - Bartender’s Guide by Trader Vic — which they keep for reference (4/5 of the book is recipes), but the first section is comprised of salty best practices.

https://i.imgur.com/Gez9xRo.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/ykcFhfd.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/loqM0gL.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/A12JkJ0.jpg

calstars, Sunday, 16 January 2022 02:37 (two years ago) link

I was just looking up used prices for that book this afternoon; out of my range. I would like to find a PDF of it until I'm rich enough to buy one.

Everybody Loves Ramen (WmC), Sunday, 16 January 2022 03:07 (two years ago) link

https://bookos-z1.org/book/5308150/5dd96d

I don't know if this link will work for you, but hey ho!

calzino, Sunday, 16 January 2022 03:16 (two years ago) link

Also here, but this is revised version from ‘72. Original was published in ‘46 iirc. From what I can tell it looks like the recipes were “updated” but the short essays in the front are the same. The writing is dated in a humorous way … “ Later on, we had a guy who could mix drinks like hallelujah holy toledo. This fellow was hot and a good friend of mine before I went into the saloon business. His name was Frank Pult.”

https://www.scribd.com/document/467774673/1972-TRADER-VICS-BARTENDERS-GUIDE-REVISED-US-pdf

calstars, Sunday, 16 January 2022 13:37 (two years ago) link

Nice, thanks!

Everybody Loves Ramen (WmC), Sunday, 16 January 2022 15:01 (two years ago) link

three months pass...

When a customer orders a subsequent drink, take care to place it in the exact spot where their last was

calstars, Saturday, 30 April 2022 16:45 (one year ago) link

A lot of my customers carefully get a cocktail napkin ready while I'm working on their drink and slide it forward for me to finish the operation.

If you were really hard core, you'd have thrown a full bottle (WmC), Saturday, 30 April 2022 17:00 (one year ago) link

Bar pros

calstars, Saturday, 30 April 2022 17:15 (one year ago) link

i went to a bar by myself yesterday, first time in forever. i was killing an hour and a half waiting for my car to be inspected down the street. i went to an irish sportsbar, and was definitely the most awkward weirdo in the room. my instincts are horrible. in this giant sportsbar, there were about 8 customers. 4 were sitting at the bar, and the remaining 4 were sitting at a pair of tables a few feet away. but this room was huge, and i had a headache, so i thought i'd just go sit at a table by myself about 100 feet away. but i had to order a drink first. 3 of the 4 people sitting at the bar were old guys, and they were all staring at me. i made eye contact with one of them and he immediately looked away, and then the bartender asked me what i wanted. she called me honey and then turned away and her jean shorts exposed like half of her ass-cheek, and then i made eye contact with another old guy and he immediately looked away. i realized i didn't know what kind of draft beers they had, so i marched around to the other side of the horseshoe-shaped bar to take a look at the little knobs. i ordered a shocktop and was immediately disappointed with what i had done, and then i asked if it was ok to sit in the other, completely empty, part of the room. it looked like it might be closed off due to no customers entering it for the past 5 years. she said you got it to my beer request and of course to my question about sitting alone. i walked back around to the other side of the bar, waiting for my beer, and then realized i needed to sit down at the bar instead of walking 100 feet away. so i sat down. it got worse from there, i assume when i left they were like wtf

Karl Malone, Saturday, 30 April 2022 18:50 (one year ago) link

i’m sure it was fine, if there are just old dudes at a bar mid-day they’re either locked in to their own thing or desperate for conversation. probably with their own kind, but you sit three seats away and they start making small comments at the tv or grunting noises to try to lure you in

mh, Sunday, 1 May 2022 03:09 (one year ago) link

Also don't smoke pot just before you go to an Irish bar. Just sayin'.

Josefa, Sunday, 1 May 2022 03:13 (one year ago) link

Karl Malone cruisin’ old guys at a dive.

DAMAGED by Black Flat (Boring, Maryland), Sunday, 1 May 2022 03:53 (one year ago) link

they will talk about this day for months to come

maf you one two (maffew12), Sunday, 1 May 2022 12:47 (one year ago) link

one year passes...

If the bar is loud and a customer has a bill of $50 or less, express the total with your fingers. Round 6 up to the next ten.

Diarrhea of a Madman (calstars), Saturday, 29 July 2023 20:20 (eight months ago) link

End every description of a drink with “it’s very distinctive”

calstars, Thursday, 10 August 2023 00:28 (eight months ago) link

When pouring a pitcher, let the brew fall on the lip to break its fall, thereby preventing half a pitcher of foam

calstars, Sunday, 13 August 2023 20:45 (eight months ago) link

three months pass...

Buy back calculation: customer must have ordered at least two rounds and have tipped half the price of their drinks

calstars, Sunday, 10 December 2023 19:02 (four months ago) link

I prefer sellbacks, where I drink as much of the beer I want, and give the rest back for a prorated refund

STUPID CRAP FACE (Neanderthal), Sunday, 10 December 2023 19:06 (four months ago) link

This is all very intimidating and confusing to me.

Christine Green Leafy Dragon Indigo, Sunday, 10 December 2023 19:11 (four months ago) link

Are you a bartender?

calstars, Sunday, 10 December 2023 19:58 (four months ago) link

two weeks pass...

When there are customers in hearing range, and the bar is quiet, and the customer tells you that they should be at work, don’t ask about the details of their employment

calstars, Thursday, 28 December 2023 20:52 (three months ago) link

i mean

Disco Biollante (Neanderthal), Thursday, 28 December 2023 20:59 (three months ago) link


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