Thread for Luc Besson's new comic book movie: Valerian

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sold

he tasted like mouth (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 21 July 2017 15:04 (six years ago) link

a critic I sometimes like has panned this on pretty much purely social justice / gender pols grounds which, maybe it really is so retrograde that is tanks the movie but it seems like a weird thing to center otherwise

a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Friday, 21 July 2017 15:04 (six years ago) link

not a visual description. i need more coffee. a description of ANYTHING he sees in the movie. i just don't understand movie writers who have no interest in the whole moving picture part of movies. or sound either for that matter! what did it sound like? he should just write for USA Today.

scott seward, Friday, 21 July 2017 15:06 (six years ago) link

"well, he acknowledges the visuals are the point, sort of"

LOL, yeah, a "hilarious" internet critic joke about mashing 5 things together and he's done! so tired. get a real writer, nyt.

scott seward, Friday, 21 July 2017 15:07 (six years ago) link

"blank"...on acid! #yawnface

scott seward, Friday, 21 July 2017 15:08 (six years ago) link

xpost You mean "uproarious" in NYT English.

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Friday, 21 July 2017 21:14 (six years ago) link

AO Scott, I will bet you, has never rolled.

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Friday, 21 July 2017 21:14 (six years ago) link

i just don't understand movie writers who have no interest in the whole moving picture part of movies. or sound either for that matter! what did it sound like?

The equivalent of music critics who devote their entire word count to gossip about the artist's personal life and analysis of lyrics as they relate to same.

grawlix (unperson), Friday, 21 July 2017 22:18 (six years ago) link

that's basically all music criticism at this point

Οὖτις, Friday, 21 July 2017 22:26 (six years ago) link

no it isn't

mark s, Friday, 21 July 2017 22:27 (six years ago) link

ok

Οὖτις, Friday, 21 July 2017 22:30 (six years ago) link

ok

mark s, Friday, 21 July 2017 22:31 (six years ago) link

Should I see this in 3D? Normally I wouldn't

badg, Friday, 21 July 2017 22:31 (six years ago) link

Yes.

Ned Raggett, Friday, 21 July 2017 22:31 (six years ago) link

ok

badg, Friday, 21 July 2017 22:34 (six years ago) link

no it isn't

Οὖτις, Friday, 21 July 2017 22:41 (six years ago) link

Valerian & Laureline: The Nebula of Ambivalence

El Tomboto, Saturday, 22 July 2017 03:35 (six years ago) link

i'm still gonna see this, 51% on metacritic which is similar to the 52% score the fifth element has on there. that seems accurate, i don't think this is receiving poorer notices than TFE did when it was released.

nomar, Saturday, 22 July 2017 19:43 (six years ago) link

we're seeing it on the 4th

El Tomboto, Saturday, 22 July 2017 20:27 (six years ago) link

i enjoyed this. i also kinda hate 3D movies. the theater itself was kinda excellent though. newfangled digital theater in a mall with an excellent screen and sound and stadium seating. would actually love to see dunkirk there. it just takes me too long to get acclimated to 3D. and i have to sit way in the back to take it all in properly. i got used to it but 3D just ends up taking me out of movies. i don't get sucked in. i'm constantly aware that i'm wearing 3D glasses and watching a 3D movie.

the dude in this was pretty lame. and the main duo had zero chemistry. it felt like they had met each other the day before. it should have been two cool women. they had no fun together. no fun banter. nothing. but whatever. there was enough cool stuff in this movie for ten movies. so much to see! very inventive. just the costumes alone. creatures. very cool. i did feel detached though. partly because of the 3D but in general i didn't really care what happened to anyone. but still, very much worth seeing.

that rihanna scene was pretty lame. she sounded like a disney fish or something. her voice didn't fit the movie. also, i would love some future music in sci-fi movies. the retro thing must die.

scott seward, Monday, 24 July 2017 02:56 (six years ago) link

this was dope (i didn't bother with 3D tho).

Neanderthal, Monday, 24 July 2017 04:42 (six years ago) link

Sounds like thing is going to lose a ton of money.

jmm, Monday, 24 July 2017 13:20 (six years ago) link

it's not primarily aimed at the US market from what I can tell

I uh didn't enjoy this v much, bizarre casting choices and just no apparent thematic core to grasp onto really

a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Monday, 24 July 2017 13:21 (six years ago) link

dane dehaan: why

crazed with patience (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 24 July 2017 13:31 (six years ago) link

cara delevingne was a joy, having the movie titled after the less interesting lead was bleh. scott otm about the lack of chemistry, the dynamic between the characters and what was supposed to be cute (the whole 'playlist' thing barf) didn't work and the monologues about love hit the wrong notes

the middle part was too much of a shaggy dog story where the plot wasn't progressing

mh, Monday, 24 July 2017 18:26 (six years ago) link

was the english dialogue written by people who were trying to coin new english idioms? kind of felt like it sometimes

mh, Monday, 24 July 2017 18:27 (six years ago) link

that is to say, people who don't have english as a primary language trying to sound hip in english

mh, Monday, 24 July 2017 18:28 (six years ago) link

cara delevingne was a joy

nah

a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Monday, 24 July 2017 18:30 (six years ago) link

they called up an intern at io9 on the phone and asked them for the hot new english language scifi slang.

nomar, Monday, 24 July 2017 18:30 (six years ago) link

I wanted to like this, but the bad aspects really outweigh the good ones in this. The two main characters were completely uninteresting, the dialogue was terrible, the plot was just a bunch of random detours.

Nice visuals, they definitely got the French comic book style down. Going in, I thought that would be enough for me to like it.

silverfish, Tuesday, 25 July 2017 15:22 (six years ago) link

I was thinking the parts bordering on interesting would grow on me, but the whole thing has kind of faded from memory already, other than a sense of irritation about how awkward and cringe-worthy all of the "romance" was

mh, Tuesday, 25 July 2017 15:32 (six years ago) link

i haven't seen it yet but have listened to the score by Desplat 2x and it is fantastic

or at night (Jon not Jon), Tuesday, 25 July 2017 16:02 (six years ago) link

Said one financier: “Looks like China is going to get burned again. We’re going to have to start hitting other planets, I think, because here we are killing yet another golden goose.”

There's like, a thousand planets

El Tomboto, Thursday, 27 July 2017 23:41 (six years ago) link

It’s unfortunate for Besson that the film bombed domestically as a warm reception in the U.S. would have helped to give the film a boost around the globe.

I'm not entirely convinced this is a useful way of thinking about a Luc Besson film.

(also as always a limitless pit of rage at 'domestically' for a foreign film being taken as meaning the US)

Andrew Farrell, Friday, 28 July 2017 08:06 (six years ago) link

"domestically" could refer to the author's or outlet's POV though (https://www.whois.com/whois/deadline.com)

But I see your point.

I am looking forward to this even more now than I already was.

El Tomboto, Friday, 28 July 2017 11:49 (six years ago) link

It's doing okay in France so far. I'm curious why they wouldn't open there first if it's their strongest potential market, unless you need to open first in North America to give the impression that this is a serious AAA blockbuster and not something weird and foreign.

jmm, Friday, 28 July 2017 12:57 (six years ago) link

This film bombed so hard we're not going to be able to see it in the theater. Oh well.

El Tomboto, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 13:52 (six years ago) link

i think i'm gonna see it this weekend but my wife's not into it, why not hop on a plane and come see it with me

i'll buy you a small popcorn

the shape of a hot willie lumpkin (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 1 August 2017 14:04 (six years ago) link

Ha, I thought you were joking about watching it on a plane, which I think is where most Americans will end up seeing it.

Josh in Chicago, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 14:08 (six years ago) link

I believe he meant "Fly to where I live"

Neanderthal, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 14:30 (six years ago) link

brb gonna charter a plane so me and tombot can bro down watching valerian on 8-inch screens somewhere over the atlantic

the shape of a hot willie lumpkin (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 1 August 2017 14:37 (six years ago) link

he's def gonna have to buy his own popcorn tho

the shape of a hot willie lumpkin (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 1 August 2017 14:39 (six years ago) link

hmm not sure making popcorn in a popcorn machine is safe on a plane, better pop it at the airport and bring it on board

mh, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 14:57 (six years ago) link

cara delevingne was a joy

Lol

flopson, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 17:22 (six years ago) link

lol I was thinking about that last night after this thread got bumped and I realized the theater showed an interview clip with her before the film that she was actually interesting in and I conflated it with movie content

mh, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 17:23 (six years ago) link

conflated my enjoyment of the interview with my enjoyment of the movie performance, I mean

or I'm turning into an old perv man like a few people around here, hard to tell

mh, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 17:24 (six years ago) link

I am not sure this movie is worth a $1100 plane ticket but I'll take some fresh popcorn

El Tomboto, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 18:10 (six years ago) link

she is interesting in interviews!!

flopson, Tuesday, 1 August 2017 18:29 (six years ago) link

this experience has reminded me of this research, which totally applies to me btw:

http://news.mit.edu/2015/harbinger-failure-consumers-unpopular-products-1223

El Tomboto, Thursday, 3 August 2017 18:35 (six years ago) link


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