rolling new food laboratory inventions for american chain restaurants thread

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Probably. I think it's also part of the post Doritos Tacos Loco "shit, we don't have to throw away the crumbs from the factory anymore!" movement.

will not abide this locos tacos slander

a landlocked exclave (mh), Sunday, 30 April 2017 06:52 (seven years ago) link

I mean, they taste great but that dust's coming from somewhere

and it's probably not a bunch of dudes in chef's whites rubbing Doritos across microplane graters

chop me out a big fat rail of floot loops dust, daddy needs sugar

ben "bance" bance (bizarro gazzara), Sunday, 30 April 2017 09:19 (seven years ago) link

okay. back to basics

http://www.cnbc.com/2017/05/01/mcdonalds-invents-the-frork-to-pitch-its-new-burgers.html

, Monday, 1 May 2017 21:00 (seven years ago) link

frork you

a landlocked exclave (mh), Monday, 1 May 2017 21:01 (seven years ago) link

how's it handle tofu?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/food/wp/2017/05/05/i-tried-to-use-the-mcdonalds-frork-it-was-actually-kind-of-fun/?utm_term=.86737bd3d8d4&tid=sm_tw

Still, I channeled my inner Beavis and Butt-Head and assembled a frork with fries shaped into devil horns. (See photo above.) I had this free-floating concern that my sandwich wouldn’t drop a load of guacamole, buttermilk ranch and pico de gallo without me squeezing it like pastry bag, but it performed beautifully. There were plenty of topping droppings to mop up with the frork, fulfilling its function in life.

Of course, to keep the game going, I did have to squeeze my sandwich like a pastry bag to get more toppings to tumble. So be it. This was the most fun I’ve had at McDonald’s since I was a kid (and the Pico Guacamole grilled chicken wasn’t so bad, either). I had to wonder, though, was I enjoying this because of the Ikea Effect, that phenomenon in which a product’s value increases with the amount of labor you invest in it?

j., Sunday, 7 May 2017 05:02 (six years ago) link

https://i.imgur.com/4RGStPz.jpg

, Monday, 8 May 2017 19:28 (six years ago) link

9.23!

How come I didn't think of that.

pplains, Monday, 8 May 2017 19:51 (six years ago) link

brb, gonna shove a hot pocket into a stick of pepperoni.

pplains, Monday, 8 May 2017 19:52 (six years ago) link

So, what is going to take the place of Burger Business? http://www.brandeating.com/ and http://www.theimpulsivebuy.com/ do check off some of the same boxes, at least a far as keeping up with food laboratory developments - if not the investigative reporting into third-quarter financial reports and late-breaking daypart crises.

✓ (Doctor Casino), Friday, 12 May 2017 14:35 (six years ago) link

thanks for both those links!

"Brand Eating" - finally, a blog for me.

But seriously, what the hell is this: http://www.brandeating.com/2017/05/great-tastes-of-america-menu-makes-annual-return-to-mcdonalds-uk-2017.html

pplains, Friday, 12 May 2017 14:59 (six years ago) link

Before you click that link, try to guess what state this burger is named after:

two beef patties, pepper jack cheese, red and yellow peppers, mayo, and spicy ketchup on a spicy sesame seed bun

pplains, Friday, 12 May 2017 14:59 (six years ago) link

ha they do 4 of them every year here in the uk

nxd, Friday, 12 May 2017 15:07 (six years ago) link

their state affiliations seem highly suspect

mh, Friday, 12 May 2017 15:41 (six years ago) link

the smashburger chain has localized burgers and the local one has this on their menu as the "Iowa":

Maytag® Blue Cheese, applewood smoked bacon,
haystack onions, lettuce, tomato & mayo on an
egg bun.

bacon and blue cheese both local products but I'm sure the perception would differ outside the region, let alone country

mh, Friday, 12 May 2017 15:44 (six years ago) link

oh, i found one i liked recently!

http://burgerlad.com/

the writer(s?) and commenters alike are all sort of charmingly wide-eyed about whatever monstrosities us crazy americans will come up with next - their review of one of the nine (!) taco bells in the UK reassures us that "the burrito didn't come ripped in half like that. I did that for 'review purposes.'"

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Friday, 12 May 2017 15:51 (six years ago) link

when, glad to see the "kfc alabama cheeseburger" takes advantage of that loophole where "burger" can be things other than beef in different places

mh, Friday, 12 May 2017 16:00 (six years ago) link

Can a chicken burger not be considered a burger where you are from, mh?

Sherman's Shermits (S-), Monday, 15 May 2017 10:36 (six years ago) link

time to fire up the 'is a hot dog a sandwich' thread again

'god knows what's in the sauce but it was delicious' made me lol irl btw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9kxYkZtoAi8

, Monday, 15 May 2017 12:24 (six years ago) link

I've never heard, locally, anything other than a beef (or beef-approximating) patty on a bun referred to as a burger. As in, a burger is a beef hamburger patty. Black bean burgers or whatever vegan equivalent usually means something that looks like a beef hamburger but isn't.

Chicken on a bun is a chicken sandwich. I'm fine with "chicken burger" but it's not really a thing here

mh, Monday, 15 May 2017 13:44 (six years ago) link

I guess a fringe case would be a ground meat on bun thing, the ground meat (or faux-meat) patty is the thing. I've had lamburgers and "chicken burgers" but they were ground meat, not a piece of chicken

mh, Monday, 15 May 2017 13:45 (six years ago) link

i've never had kimchi and thought 'what this needs is more 7up'

mh, here in the nightmare netherworld of theresa may's britain chicken burgers are def a thing, eg

https://img.tesco.com/Groceries/pi/641/5000116101641/IDShot_540x540.jpg

made with real bird's eyes iirc

completely aware, just saying it's not the norm in the kfc homeland

mh, Monday, 15 May 2017 13:52 (six years ago) link

that smashburger chain I mentioned above, their website has it differentiated to the point there's a stark BURGERS | CHICKEN category distinction!
http://smashburger.com/eat/menu/

mh, Monday, 15 May 2017 13:53 (six years ago) link

i just looked at burger king's uk website to confirm that they serve a chicken burger (they do) and i found a link to a bk delivery site which opens on this display of mysterious matter

http://i1247.photobucket.com/albums/gg622/bizarrogazzara/Lumps_zpsuauhrnxr.jpg

i feel like having these brought to your house could be considered a hate crime

the product on the right looks like some sort of cheese popper which would have jalapeno bits inside in the US, but I hesitate to make any assumptions on what the green bits could be elsewhere

mh, Monday, 15 May 2017 13:59 (six years ago) link

lime jelly, iirc

the yellow stuff is custard

Whatever happened to the jalapeño popper? Used to be everywhere. I guess I don't really patronize fast casual chains anymore so maybe I'm just not seeing them in my bubble.

your cognitive privilege (El Tomboto), Monday, 15 May 2017 14:08 (six years ago) link

went full fast food, people burned out on them afaik

mh, Monday, 15 May 2017 14:10 (six years ago) link

looking closer i think those burger king 'snacks' might be served on old wallpaper offcuts

re: Seven-Up recipes - - - I can't seem to find Lileks's original coverage of Cooking With Seven-Up (maybe pulled after being incorporated into a book?) but here's a worthwhile followup series: http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/sevenup2/index.html

http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/sevenup2/4.jpg

✓ (Doctor Casino), Monday, 15 May 2017 15:46 (six years ago) link

when my great-grandmother was alive she made something like the above jello mold every thanksgiving that involved lime jello, 7-up, fruit cocktail, a shitload of whipped cream, and CELERY AND WALNUTS

god knows i miss her but i do not miss that

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Monday, 15 May 2017 16:51 (six years ago) link

. . . piquant . . . delicious!

✓ (Doctor Casino), Monday, 15 May 2017 17:17 (six years ago) link

I never knew about the burger thing!

https://www.kfc.com/menu/sandwiches/
http://www.kfc.co.nz/menu/burger-combos/

Sherman's Shermits (S-), Tuesday, 16 May 2017 03:18 (six years ago) link

This is an ontological error that must be corrected by conquest

softie (silby), Tuesday, 16 May 2017 05:26 (six years ago) link

Kumara Tower Stacker

Take a bite into this Kiwi twist on our famous Tower burger. Original recipe fillet, a golden kumara hash brown, tasty tomato mustard sauce, cheese and crispy onions. If you’re feeling brave, the Kumara Stacker with an extra fillet is just for you!

Add a little spice and ask for a Zinger!

Yes pls!!!

-1 fillet I'm not a monster

uh, i... i... i'm feeling brave

j., Tuesday, 16 May 2017 07:21 (six years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YL_Xyi2u-T8

, Tuesday, 16 May 2017 12:22 (six years ago) link


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