in every old movie ever

I guess you could say the word has aged like an acceptable wine

I still use it a lot. Back to the thread in question:

Trumpeter in jazz band in nightclub from below at an angle.

^well done

Women described as 'handsome'.

Women wearing hats.

And gloves, anywhere and at all times.

Anyone, arriving at anyone's home or place of business at any time of day, will be offered a drink or the opportunity to fix themselves one. The wetbar may be more or less fully stocked depending whether this is a millionaire's study or the office of the Chief of Police, but an ice bucket with tongs is invariably present.

Hot-cha! Hot-cha! Twenty-three skidoooooo!

a fistfight where everyone just slaps each other

Foreign professor in a bow tie

My friend needs information or they'll die! I must physically move myself to them to pass it on in the nick of time.

a fistfight where everyone just slaps each other

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand)

Fistfights generally pretty tame/dull in Golden Age movies.

Declarative sentences beginning with "Why,...!"

Barman ducks as a glass or bottle smashes into the wall/mirror behind him (Westerns section).

Declarative sentences beginning with "Why,...!"

good one!

lol read that as Batman

Yeah everything is funnier in costume

distressed woman has heard quite enough and screams, "get out!"

"Say, Jimmy, you just might be on to something with that idea. You're a regular Albert Einstein!"

"Wow, Albert Einstein... gee, thanks, Professor! (pause) Who's Albert Einstein?"

A rider on a galloping horse is shot. Both go down; the human stays down while the horse struggles to its feet.

With stock library 'Neigggh!' dubbed in slightly out of time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NsJmMoCdjE4

Also, the footage of the galloping horse is sped up just enough to tip it into the uncanny valley, and the coconuts intended to give the sound effect of horses' hooves are in full use.

Plucky kids put on a show.

Any scene in a jungle anywhere in the world features Australian kookaburras laughing on the soundtrack

Lol

Two characters have conversation; director has somehow contrived to have them both facing camera.

Character asked simple question. Gazes into middle distance and recounts entire life story.

Life story is flashback running for several minutes or perhaps nearly the entire length of the film. The person who asked the question hardly bats an eye and only grows more fascinated.

Two characters have conversation; director has somehow contrived to have them both facing camera.

bonus points if this is staged using an eye-watering split-diopter lens

UK edition: Drunk batchelor falls down stairs and wakes the landlady who tells him to pack and leave

Married couples sleeping in seperate beds (surely been mentioned?)

Watched All About Eve last night and it's chock full of these.

I was watching an old movie ("The Gilded Lily" with Claudette Colbert) and right on cue in the first reel a transit cop gets pushed to the ground, the next shot shows him sputtering, fuming, pushing his cop cap back on his head and stating (I quote):

"Oh, a wise guy, eh?"

Two characters have conversation; director has somehow contrived to have them both facing camera.

another variant: mirror hung in unlikely location permits us to see both faces even with characters facing each other.

Fistfights generally pretty tame/dull in Golden Age movies.

― chap, Sunday, July 16, 2017 4:48 PM (three weeks ago)

every fistfight in an old movie seems to start with someone turning his back as if he's about to walk away, then abruptly turning around and knocking the other guy down

i suspect this would not actually be a wise move in real life

I guess by old, you mean '30s and '40s. If it's a late-'60s/early-'70s romance involving young people, there will be snow, and there will be frolicking in the snow. Maybe snow angels, maybe tumbling around, maybe a pretend snowball fight. As they frolic, something that sounds like the Association will play on the soundtrack.

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/S8tncYfSFzI/hqdefault.jpg

As action or antics spill into a bar or performance space: "Wow, are they part of the show?" "Boy, those sure are some crazy costumes!" "Say, that's a pretty cool new dance!" etc.

i'm imagining all those ADR'ed over the actual scene which probably has not been shot with sync sound

those fuckin... the old phones

Lip reading cons in the day room, visiting area or on the factory floor.

A bottle of hair tonic.

flypaper gets stuck to hands. one of the lesser scenes in kane.

Shabby alcoholic (ex-)doctor who will remove stray bullets from hoodlums for the price of a bottle of bourbon.

the other week i watched "the bride came c.o.d.", a 1941 comedy with james cagney and bette davis that felt like the ultimate "old movie" as defined by this thread. someone even gets to say "oh, a wise guy, eh?"

also includes an angry heiress, spinning newspaper headlines, and that one shot of police cars and motorcycles zooming out of the station, with the sirens blazing

Must watch this!

Bonus points for police motorcycles with sidecars

I caught an old film on daytime TV last week that actually featured a monocle popping out in shock, can't remember what it was though...

Street urchin selling newspapers. Cop/PI/suspect takes one from him, starts reading it and is about to walk off with it when the seller tugs his sleeve for the dime he owes him.

Fistfights generally pretty tame/dull in Golden Age movies.

― chap, Sunday, July 16, 2017 5:48 PM (four years ago)

The fight at the end in Uncle Silas stands out, seems brutal for the era