Sources tell SI Alex Rodriguez tested positive for steroids in 2003

wow that blog spend a lot of time saying nothing

not really

lol:

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2009/writers/jeff_pearlman/05/01/arod.griffey/index.html?bcnn=yes

Less than a year ago, people were not merely speculating how many career home runs he would hit (800? 850? 900? 950?), but also how his name atop the all-time list would return Aaron-esque decency to a record book poisoned by Bonds' regrettable presence. Rodriguez was the Brad Pitt of baseball -- the pretty boy with chops who could carry a big-budget adventure through the summer.

Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous. Instead, Rodriguez brings to mind a slightly different fabled theatrical figure -- one who, 20 years ago, took America by storm. At the time, we fell in love with Spuds MacKenzie because the bull terrier brought spark and pizzazz to the otherwise mundane world of beer advertising. He was cute and funny and talented and engrossing.

Then, we learned the truth. Spuds, a lady-killer in ads, was actually a girl. Her real name was Honey Tree Evil Eye, and she didn't even like beer.

Turns out, ol' Spuds MacKenzie was nothing special after all.

Just another dog.

Selena Roberts book on Spuds was just brutal. Apparently he liked to tear up flower beds! And he once peed on a baby carriage. Other dogs didn't like him at the dog park, etc. . .

that's maybe the most hilarious sub-plaschke reach for significance i have ever seen

Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous.
Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous.
Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous.
Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous.
Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous.
Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous.
Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous.
Now, with the latest revelations, the comparison to Pitt seems ludicrous.

I am excited to have this opportunity to say that I really hate Jeff Pearlman's writing.

the bull terrier brought spark and pizzazz to the otherwise mundane world of beer advertising. He was cute and funny and talented and engrossing.

wow i'm really happy i haven't bothered to track down his book on the cowboys yet.

Spuds MacKenzie was a dog.

A good dog.

A very good dog.

But every dog has its day.

And it was a day that we'll never forget, although Rodriguez hopes that we will one day.

Selena Roberts has done what nobody thought was possible -- she put that dog on a leash. And fed it apple juice instead of beer.

It turned out that the dog liked the juice. OH HO, SEE WHAT I DID THERE??

GUYS, THESE ARE PEARLS OF WISDOM!

I am going to learn to tell the fake excerpts from real

Why would you want to do that? Live in the mystery!

morbs, in the epilogue roberts writes about how, even though he wasn't very popular with his teammates, a-rod was very popular with his local crew of obama canvassers. one time, she writes, he treated them all to a showing of "i love you man"

Now see that's not at all credible.

"i love you man" is a metaphor for "the fun cooker".

"I worked out with him when he was 18. He could lift almost as much as I could"
Apr 30, 2009
Jose Canseco

"At 18, he could deadlift 300 pounds and his breasts were larger than some of my ex-girlfriends'. Me and Mark (McGwire) couldn't believe what we were seeing. He didn't need any help with his injections, he just fearlessly plunged these huge needles into his own oily, rippled ass without a second thought. Mark said to me one day, "that kid is the future of this sport". I rubbed my nipples and tried to laugh to laugh it off, but I knew he was right."

-- Jose Canseco, May 2, 2009

we thought spuds was fun. it turned out he was a chick. wtf spuds.

For her, a key insight into A-Rod's character comes with what some might call a fib: He tells people he hit with wood bats in high school because that's what the pros use, even though she found photo evidence he used metal.

SELENA ROBERTS, DID YOU WRITE WITH PENS IN HIGH SCHOOL?

Yes, I did.

WE HAVE OBTAINED PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE THAT YOU USED A PENCIL.

OK, there was this --

YOU HAVE TOLD WHAT SOME MIGHT CALL A FIB. WE FEEL THIS IS A TREMENDOUS INSIGHT INTO YOUR CHARACTER. (EVEN THOUGH IT IS POSSIBLE WE HAVE A PICTURE OF YOU USING A PENCIL THE ONE DAY YOU USED A PENCIL IN HIGH SCHOOL) IT IS APPARENT THAT YOU HAVE TOLD US YOU USED PENS AS A WAY TO PRODUCE THE ILLUSION THAT YOU WERE PERFECT IN HIGH SCHOOL, THAT YOU WERE SO PERFECT THAT YOU DID NOT NEED TO USE A PENCIL -- A WRITING INSTRUMENT WITH AN ERASER, AFTER ALL. YOU WOULD TRANSPOSE LETTERS, USE IMPERFECT GRAMMAR, AND MAKE OTHER MISTAKES AS YOU WROTE IN CLASSES. YOU USED A WRITING INSTRUMENT WITH AN ERASER AS A SAFETY NET -- YOUR ONLY BARRIER BETWEEN PERFECTION AND ABJECT FAILURE. YOU ARE A SAD, MISERABLE LITTLE PERSON.

But, I --

SORRY, GOTTA RUN. BOB COSTAS IS CALLING.

http://assets.nydailynews.com/img/2009/07/26/alg_arod-kate.jpg

A-Rod went 0-for-4 Saturday - but he made it to first base anyway.

The randy Yankees slugger and stunning actress Kate Hudson put on a very public display of affection for the first time, locking lips during the team's annual family picnic.

Hudson, 33, was also spotted giving Rodriguez a big squeeze as the lovestruck pair canoodled following the Bombers' loss to the Oakland A's.

A-Rod's focus wasn't just on his flaming hot new gal pal. The Yankees star also spent time playing with daughters Ella, 1, and Natasha, 4, who were dressed in their Yankees best.

Notably absent from the family fest was A-Rod's ex-wife, Cynthia Rodriguez, whom he divorced last fall.

The very public smooching puts to rest rumors that Rodriguez, 33, and Hudson are just close friends.
Hudson, the daughter of Goldie Hawn, is believed to have met A-Rod last November in Miami.

Since then, she has been spotted slipping into Rodriguez's swanky midtown pad and cheering him on from the front row at several Yankees games.

The couple was first photographed together two weeks ago in Beverly Hills.

In recent years, A-Rod's exploits off the field have garnered as much attention as his slugging.

His rumored conquests include Madonna and a Las Vegas stripper, with whom he was photographed in a Toronto hotel two years ago while he was still married.

and a las vegas stripper? this guy