Taking sides: Children vs. (non-human) animals

One of the reasons not covered here yet: Many women want to have children (for their own completely autonomous and independent reasons, of course, but the trend holds true IME). Many of those women are interesting and desirable and fun to be around. Some of them even like to have sex!

Helping an interesting and desirable woman have children tends to be a really good way to cement a pair-bond with such a woman. You'll probably live in the same domicile, and current convention often puts you in the same bed with her. Through biologic necessity, force of habit, and conventional mores, you're probably gonna have sex with her (even after making kids).

If you are a hetero d00d and you value ready access to sex slightly more than you value variety of sexual partners, the whole marriage-house-kids thing can lead to a pretty reliable source.

Not the only reason, just sayin: it can be part of the cost-benefit calculation.

Awful reason to do it obv and one of the leading causes of trouble in the world

If you're a dood that doesn't want kids then find a woman that doesn't want kids, the volte face in sexual relation dynamics and population trends can only be positive things

ppl who make a point of defining themselves as "childfree" and go around contemptuously referring to ppl with kids as "breeders" are about as creepy and unpleasant as any other subset of ppl you'll find on the internet

True but this is the thread for abusing parents

Fulfill expectations of my family and community
Fulfill my biological imperative to transmit genetic code
Religious tenets
Hopeful insurance to have support/familial bonds in old age
New ppl to play board games with

All terrible reasons, but who am I to judge?

at least one of those reasons is responsible for the propagation of all life which admittedly doesn't have much to recommend itself except that it's more interesting than empty desolate terrain

I'll continue to tell myself I didn't have kids because I'm aware of carrying capacity.

Plus, Teufel is cuter and better housetrained.

http://i47.tinypic.com/2n59wg.jpg

(mordy i hope i didn't offend you with the w33d thing -- totally joeking)

at least one of those reasons is responsible for the propagation of all life which admittedly doesn't have much to recommend itself except that it's more interesting than empty desolate terrain

Come on, board games aren't that important.

Best reason to have kids is that kids are terrific awesome creatures

But u can usually cancel that out by setting against sleep, cash and their becoming humans at some stage, also the fact that you can never again use public transport or eateries until they are idk 32

I think the best reason is meeting someone you love and thinking why the hell not? Just throwing that one out there.

lmk when you turn 32 xp

I believe the children are our future.

(-Bob Marley)

Seems a bit randomly....random tbh. Not exactly first principle stuff, the aul 'arah fwy not' argument

I get the looking after me when no-one else will thing but the rest is meaningless to me.

no you definitely didn't offend me. i have smoked w/ my parents & generally i don't find it particularly enjoyable and i was wondering if my kids will feel the same about smoking with me? like is the problem that my parents are goofy stoners or does it bother me since i feel like the child/parent bond is kinda shallow when everyone is stoned if you know what i mean? like i have expectations about my parents even now as an adult such that i'm kinda disappointed when they're just dumb and obvious (excitedly telling me about some theory they just thought up is a bummer even tho like i understand - smoking w33d - we've all been there). but otoh i don't think i get like that when i'm stoned so maybe my kids will feel differently? i enjoy drinking w/ my dad so it could just be the particular personalities w/ the particular chemistry. xxxpz

Best reason to have kids is that kids are terrific awesome creatures

they can be terrific and they can be tedious. i think if you have kids because you think it's going to be an awesomefest all the time you're setting yourself up for disappointment. but you're right that there's plenty to appreciate in the moments when they're not whining, fighting, interrupting your conversation, demanding you turn off tinariwen and turn on the frozen soundtrack. i love reading books to them - my youngest loves the kate beaton kid's book and i never get tired of reading it - but sometimes they want the same terrible book for the 8th night in a row and you read it to them completely on autopilot while you think about something else. sometimes they want hugs and to cuddle up with you and it's wonderful and sometimes they've been touching you for 2 hours straight and you just don't want to be touched any more. they play nicely together and you feel really warm + proud and then one of them breaks a plate over the other one's head (don't worry, everyone is fine, it was a very fragile piece of pottery). like this goes on and on. parental pride when your kid accomplishes something is like nothing else. but you'll be disappointed too and embarrassed sometimes. so i'm just saying be prepared i guess.

All of that is still awesome because kids are allowed to be like that which is awesome rly

demanding you turn off tinariwen and turn on the frozen soundtrack

lol <3

can't believe i just <3'd future phillies fans

so proud when they throw their first battery at a player

"I think the best reason is meeting someone you love and thinking why the hell not? Just throwing that one out there."

I didn't even think why the hell not. I had kids with the only person on earth I would have wanted to have kids with. I didn't even think about trying to have kids or not trying to have kids. there was no hesitation or thought involved. and there is pretty much ALWAYS hesitation as far as my weird brain goes. i recommend finding this kind of person if you are gonna have kids. because there are all kinds of wrong reasons to have kids.

You know, kids can be frustrating, challenging, maddening, certainly exhausting, but there is nothing, and I mean nothing, like watching one of your favorite films, or a classic film, with them for the first time. In recent weeks we've seen "The Third Man," "King Kong," "Lawrence of Arabia" (well, most of it), "Shadow of a Doubt," "Close Encounters," "North By Northwest" ... Literally the best it gets.

Nah I'm pretty sure the best it gets is the lime popsicle I'm having right now

Among the possible challenges and rewards that life may present you with, I find the challenges and rewards of caring for a new human and raising that person up to be decent, sensible, creative, kindly beings calls forth most of my best abilities. One also gets a very direct outlet for one's capacity to love, and love is surpassingly good, whenever and however it is called forth.

But if you hate kids, none of the above really applies.

I think we need some more thoughtful rumination on how rewarding the incredible responsibility of raising kids can be. Is anybody on ILX up to the task?

I'm not sure if Thomas Edison ever had kids. But I hear he did other stuff and made some money and it all came out OK for him. He even got to meet celebrities and shit.

Turns out Edison had a few offspring after all. Who knew?

xpost all of us get to shit

But only the lucky ones get to meet celebrities and shit.

ppl who make a point of defining themselves as "childfree" and go around contemptuously referring to ppl with kids as "breeders" are about as creepy and unpleasant as any other subset of ppl you'll find on the internet

― (The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Saturday, March 18, 2017 12:12 AM (two days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

nowhere near as creepy as the "ready access to sex" post a couple above yours

Yes, that was post was, er, well I sort of wish I hadn't read it.

Dating sucks, so I decided to become a dad

The 'ready access to sex' post is so wrong on so many levels that it becomes almost amusing.

Our main motivation, frankly (initially), was that we didn't want to turn around in 30 years and regret having NOT had kids. After we'd decided on that Em definitely got quite driven about it though, and has described it as a biological desire switching on.

children are a great way to secure an orgasm-facilitator for an extended period

"ready access to sex" doesn't really correlate well w/ marriage and kids let's be real

"I got married and had kids for the sex" probably the most o_O take I've seen in a minute

I was kind of disappointed that no one was going "wait, what" at that post when it happened

"I got married and had kids for the sex" probably the most o_O take I've seen in a minute

Sex with the wife that is. I hope.

I never wait what a post until i see the djp position tbh you need to accept yr position as a major influencer

like this post from The Cut, in a world with no birth control!

http://nymag.com/thecut/2015/03/when-is-a-penis-too-good-to-break-up-with.html

For emoji, try eggplant, peace-sign fingers, bomb.

prob goes in the contro op thread but

people really shld be able to pass an intelligence exam and meet certain requirements to qualify to be a parent

hmm yes what could possibly go wrong with that policy, I can't even imagine

would you like a list of geniuses whose parents were illiterate/poor/horrible

Some of the worst parents in the world are the 'intelligent' ones.

intelligence not measuring doing quadratic equations genius

as if that's the only type of intelligence

Eh

Kind of agree with the lefty outlook here, but would add coda

- tbh its not like less kids is a bad thing, regardless of opportunity cost in random geniuses
- properly applied death penalty takes care of the offspring as and when they have it coming, removing need to regulate parental input on a predictive basis