girls, gurls, grrls: c/d, s/d

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I've always been amoral.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:05 (twenty years ago) link

no shit

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:07 (twenty years ago) link

haha dare we dredge up the "long distance relationships" thread

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:07 (twenty years ago) link

jess u a freak

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:08 (twenty years ago) link

Hahaha either way this isn't a moral question. He's not your friend and you don't know the nature of their relationship.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:08 (twenty years ago) link

also, you want to fuck lenny kravitz, which puts you in a league with church desecrators and cast of tv's models inc.

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:08 (twenty years ago) link

"call me" + "i have a boyfriend"
=
"come over sometime" + "i live near a nuclear power station"
=
"you have a great ass" + "i'm your new parole officer"
=
"thing you would like to do" + "thing that, when coupled with last thing, is likely to result in a whole new bad thing"

you get me?

― m., Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:09 (twenty years ago) link

Wanting to fuck Lenny isn't amoral. It's sensible.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:10 (twenty years ago) link

If you like her, try to spend more time with her. If she is sexually unavailable, that will be frustrating but if her personality is up to snuff you will enjoy being around her more than you will enjoy writing her off because she's in a relationship.

If you diss her now, she is less likely to hook up with you if/when she becomes available later. If you befriend her and treat her well, she might ditch her boyfriend to be with you (the caveat being that if she does so the number of "get out of fuck-up free" cards you will have in the relationship is drastically reduced).

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:12 (twenty years ago) link

(my poor phrasing makes it appear as if the thing you would like to do is "a great ass" which, oh lord, isn't an implication this place needs right now)

― m., Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:13 (twenty years ago) link

Alternately, you could throw voles at her and shout "FOUL TEMPTRESS BEGONE" when she gets off of work.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:13 (twenty years ago) link

you get me?

No no, that's not necessarily true at all. It could be true. But there just isn't enough information. First of all, she might not actually have a boyfriend, or may as well not have one. Secondly, we have no idea what having a boyfriend means either to her or to the guy in question.

One phone call answers a lot of questions; right now, optimism can't do any damage.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:14 (twenty years ago) link

(x-post)Hahaha Dan this is JESS not ROGER ADULTERY!

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:14 (twenty years ago) link

i imagine it would be somewhat difficult to initiate (even the semblance of) a platonic relationship at this point, dan. but yeah i suppose that's good advice nonetheless.

― m., Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:15 (twenty years ago) link

"optimism can't do any damage" vs "if the opportunity presents itself, i will fuck her until her head twists around like linda blair"

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:16 (twenty years ago) link

wtf - just steal her from her boyfriend

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:16 (twenty years ago) link

I agree with half of what Dan says and the underlying sentiment, but think that it's never a good idea to be with someone who left someone to be with you. But that's a separate conversation that isn't really in play here.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:17 (twenty years ago) link

Jess can you, like, have her post on this thread about herself? I think we really need to hear both sides...

― ModJ (ModJ), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:17 (twenty years ago) link

(The point of that isn't so much "YAY YOU LEFT HIM TO BE WITH ME" as much as it is "YAY YOU LEFT HIM PREPARE FOR THE TILT-A-WHIRL")

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:18 (twenty years ago) link

No, I know, (I know, that's why it's a separate conversation and not just FOUL DAN, BEGONE!)

(Couldn't decide) if I wanted parentheses or not.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:19 (twenty years ago) link

think that it's never a good idea to be with someone who left someone to be with you

yes, i agree. one finds oneself wondering if they're not next in line.

― vahid (vahid), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:20 (twenty years ago) link

you got a point tep. i suppose this is what i get from having learnt about relationship dynamics more from sitcoms than real life. yknow if jess were to post the link to her (no doubt existent) friendster profile, we might be able to make more accurate assessments concerning the nature of the relationship.

― m., Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:20 (twenty years ago) link

Vahid, technically everyone's either someone who left someone to be with someone else or someone who's been left by someone for someone else.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:21 (twenty years ago) link

one finds oneself wondering if they're not next in line.

And whether they're with someone who needs to be with someone -- whoever's the best of those who are available -- or someone who wants to be with them. But that's relationship stuff; Jess is talking about Blairing, not relationshipping.

Alex, that's a terrible thing to think, if you think it.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:22 (twenty years ago) link

Yeah, who gives a shit about her boyfriend (unless in some weird twist of fate/time/distance/job, it's my girlfriend, in which, please have some compassion), just go for it.

― C0L1N B3CK3TT (Colin Beckett), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:23 (twenty years ago) link

Although, if she knees you in the balls because she LIKES you, imagine what her bouncer/bodybuilder boyfriend will do.

― C0L1N B3CK3TT (Colin Beckett), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:23 (twenty years ago) link

Well it's a huge reduction, yes, but it's not less of one than to say just because someone left someone to be with you that they will leave you to be with someone else.

Not that it's necessarilly applicable in this situation anyway.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:24 (twenty years ago) link

To Tep obv.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:25 (twenty years ago) link

Although, if she knees you in the balls because she LIKES you, imagine what her bouncer/bodybuilder boyfriend will do.

"You asshole! This is for making a move on my girlfriend!" *bouncer kneels down and swallows Jess to the hilt while confused pr0n music starts up in the background*

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:26 (twenty years ago) link

(ok I think I should leave work now)

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:26 (twenty years ago) link

It's not even a reduction so much as something that skips over everyone who's single for any appreciable period. I honestly can't even figure out how you could mean it.

I was single for two years; my current girlfriend hadn't seen anyone seriously for about that length of time, when we met; who did either of us leave, for heaven's sake?

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:27 (twenty years ago) link

:-O

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:27 (twenty years ago) link

i think the big thing is that, you know, i dont NEED any adding headaches right now. i DONT need a "girlfriend", like, at all. i mean, i am absolutely so broke that when i think about i feel like weeping, i live with moms, i have no idea "what i am doing with my life". i just wanted sex goddamnit!!!

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:28 (twenty years ago) link

sing "downlow" to her

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:30 (twenty years ago) link

or "My Boo"!

― C0L1N B3CK3TT (Colin Beckett), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:30 (twenty years ago) link

Tep, well I presume you left your previous relationship with the idea that at some point you would be dating someone else, yes? Whether you knew the person at that point is sort of beside my point though, I will admit. It was an intentionally overbroad statement

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:30 (twenty years ago) link

Ask her if she has any girlfriends you can ball, Jess!

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:31 (twenty years ago) link

if there was a song that could express what i feel right now it'd be some weird r. kelly/jesus lizard mashup

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:32 (twenty years ago) link

use the word "hilt" in a sentence to her

― Kingfish Balzac (Kingfish), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:33 (twenty years ago) link

Richard X should get on that shit.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:33 (twenty years ago) link

Well yeah, that's like conflating "people who kill once in awhile" with "serial killers," for pete's sake. Let's be reasonable.

Jess, dude, call her before you worry about girlfriend vs sex etc. If nothing happens with her, nothing happens, but possibly she has friends she'll introduce you to, and so on. There are all kinds of unfilled blanks here.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:34 (twenty years ago) link

"Well yeah, that's like conflating "people who kill once in awhile" with "serial killers," for pete's sake. Let's be reasonable."

Look I'm not a "serial killer", I just like to murder the occassional hooker, okay.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:35 (twenty years ago) link

"Jenny, there's this guy I want you to meet. He tongued me down in the coffeeshop the other day, so I kneed him in the nuts. Then I thought of you."

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:36 (twenty years ago) link

Mama always said it ain't murder if they're dirty.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:36 (twenty years ago) link

... xpost.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:37 (twenty years ago) link

RUN XTINA, RUN!!!!!!!

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:37 (twenty years ago) link

"i will never you, mouthbreather"

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:37 (twenty years ago) link

but what if they're drrrrty?

(xpost) GODDAMMIT MY FINGERS IS TOO SLOW

― Kingfish Balzac (Kingfish), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:37 (twenty years ago) link

DON'T NEVER ME!

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:38 (twenty years ago) link

This is a very inspiring thread.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:38 (twenty years ago) link

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