Worst ever festival line up?

was thinking the other day about how dull all of the mid-sized British festivals (and a lot of the smaller ones as well) look this year, everything boring 6Music-friendly schmindy with some half-decent dance music thrown in if you're lucky. Is it more homogeneous than in the past? Is it something to do with lack of Glastonbury this year meaning things will sell even if very dull?

glastonbury is happening this year .. its next year they are taking a break.

ah okay, thanks. I suppose that can be ruled out as a cause then!

There are three kinds of UK festival
- Super-commercial one-dayers headlined by Bastille
- Hippie ska drug-fests headlined by Gentleman's Dub Club
- Posho adult-oriented camp-outs set in the beautifully rainy Cotswolds headlined by Joanna Newsom

via chaki

http://pbs.twimg.com/media/C6hKsevUwAA4DnS.png

Animal Collective playing a festival called "ID10T" ... please tell me that's real!

Monster Energy Drink Comedy Tent

I know those words, but that sign makes no sense.

I'm sure pitchfork readers that were frozen in 2006 will be very excited if they thaw in time for Sunday.

Cosplay Welcome!

what's garfunkel & oates?

the last few festival line ups in this thread are kinda not that bad.

http://festileaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/pinkpop-poster-2017-featured.jpg

(pinkpop)

Yeah, c'mon..

Xpost-withdraw

poor Richard Ashcroft

I love Garfunkel and Oates. Two funny women who sing funny songs.

I don't even remotely understand who that last festival is meant to be aimed at.

Moderat being billed higher than Blink 182 is pretty o_0 or do they play like arenas in that area of the world?

Roskilde goes on late and tends to put a DJ on after the headliner on the main stage, and I assume Blink are headlining a smaller stage.

sum 41 too low

Returning to that awful 1988 Reading Festival - No problem with the Friday, The Ramones followed by Iggy? c'mon.

The other days? Well, the best thing about that was that it was going bad year-by-year until that one, so It Had To Die!

I love Garfunkel and Oates. Two funny women who sing funny songs

That's a relief, I thought it must be a new duo of Art Garfunkel and John Oates.

poor Richard Ashcroft

Just comeuppance imo.

These people.

http://hopeandgloryfestival.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/Announcement_web-1-683x1024.jpg

^^^^^^^^^ winner

That can't be real, surely!?

What happened to Badly Drawn Boy? He was supposed to be a massive star, now he's spent over a decade propping up the bottom of shitty festival lineups.

I mean, fucking hell, you couldn't possibly come up with a worse line-up than that. Either way, it's some expert trolling!

Last time I saw anything from BDB he was going mental and calling an audience cunts, chucking his harmonica at them

He seems really unpleasant

Badly Behaved Boy

They should have got Crispy Ambulance to headline

"Football Legends Charity Darts Match, Charlotte Church in Conversation, The Liverpool International Air Guitar Competition"

^^^ HMHB lyric

"Try to imagine your favourite bands, huge tunes, combined with a decadent Victoriana carnival, wicked fun, with a heavy dose of outrageous sideshows, and you’ll begin to get a picture of what HOPE & GLORY festival is. A festival of proper music and real anthems."

AND they've got a clay trampoline, for those who'd prefer hospital.

the fact that the twang have apparently been floating around doing their thing for over a decade now has gotten me down

'The Membranes & 25 Piece Choir'

?!?!?!?!&^&^%$$^^$^?!%>?{?!?!?

"Charlotte Church's Late Night Pop Dungeon"?

that sounds like something v different than she intended

"The Membranes will be bringing their critically acclaimed gig with a 25 piece all women choir to the Lexington on Friday June 3rd"

Looks like this is a regular thing at the moment.

that sounds like something v different than she intended

Does it, though?

"Charlotte Church's Late Night Pop Dungeon"?

her whole current tour is billed as this.
and i bet its bloody brilliant.

it very well might be! I was only focused on the "dungeon" name, my only experience with her music is when the label was trying to push her as a Josh Groban-type artist which I gather she hasn't been doing for over a decade.

Explaining the Pop Dungeon concept, Church said: “Down the dark, dark stairs, upon the bloody gallows of soft rock, through the oubliette of cheese, into the torture chamber of disco, you are welcomed to the Late Night Pop Dungeon.

“The Grand High Executionatrix, dungeon mistress Charlotte Church ,and her ten-piece ultra-metronomic post-punk-disco-R’n’R’n’B backing band will give her MK Ultra treatment to the greatest tunes that time forgot, and some that will forever haunt our collective memory. Bring dancing shoes – the floor is on fire.”

There is a festival planned for Pioneer Square in Seattle this year that has the worst lineup I've ever seen.

https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/enhanced/webdr03/2013/2/28/11/enhanced-buzz-6834-1362070250-1.jpg

This would have been the worst but it was cancelled.

Wonder why.

Re previous, Hope&Glory, dunno there are a few good things in there, and the rest are mostly not awful. if you were to watch until you were ready to move on, should be OK I think.

So what is the best UK festival this year? Does one exist? Compared to a lot of European and US festivals, I find it hard to find one that caters to my music taste, isn't a totally basic commercial nightmare, isn't a total hippie dread-fest, is still fun, goes on late enough into the night, isn't massively oversubscribed and isn't way overpriced. That said, I really miss being in a field over the summer and hearing music. Is Europe the way to go?

Safe as Milk looks p good;

https://safeasmilkfestival.com/sam17

Counterflows festival always has seem great performances:

http://counterflows.com/

I'd love to go to Safe As Milk. I Doubt I could convince any of my mates to go - they're all Boomtown Fair fans. Alas, the plight of the hipster music fan living in a small city.

You have to feel sorry for The Verve Pipe, having a similar name to a far superior band.

the verve pipe must be seriously lousy

we were merely freshmahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhn
AIAHAOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW