Longmont Potion Castle

If we can't get some moisturization going here I'm gonna need some reimbursement

"Who's the shipper?"

"Peacock Hut."

"No."

"Oh, yeah."

i think my favorite call of all time is super nintendo (pt 1, pt 2)

the way he starts to empathize with the kid then all of a sudden switches back to his empty aggressive threats is classic. also lol at the dad's limp attempts at trying to match his fightin words

"I'll be talking to whoever I need to talk to, to get it resolved"
"You'll be talking to the pavement once you're lying up right upon it"

loool

"I got a little bit of it on tape"
"Oh we'll play it at your funeral, how about that"

Guys

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_w8QFzmbXw

First 13 minutes or so are one call and it's fucking extraordinary. Like I get the feeling at times the guy is fucking with LPC but I'm never quite sure.

'I'm Wilder'
'Like Van Wilder?'

Yes, this one is positively amazing.

'No one in Alabama acts like this. Ye got me blood pressure right up!'

Ohhhh boy, guy is serious about his country music!

(Stamina on this guy! The sound effects would've driven me nuts on this one, on the phone)

('It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter! crept into my vocab way too confident tbh)

"You drive a Humvee? How you like it?"

"You're not gonna like it when you're lying in back going to the clinic."

if me and me got in a fight i would win

do we think he researches his victims on social media before calling nowadays (e.g. buttcheek knowledge)

i feel like the dude is in on it, or at least started to be amused and rolled w/it once it started

you got sundry items all over the place

victims starting to play along is like a sub-genre of LPC

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gkQ3HQvDxPI

"Listen, I've been on the water for 44 years. I have hundreds of millions of dollars in assets at my disposal."

"i got 'cher phone number from a bank president"

hahaha this clip is so good. reminds me that i need to go buy the new one

"i need you to bring it down a peg, alright?"
"actually tonight im gonna bring it up a notch a little bit. make it a little louder"
"nOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO"

"a weave, please."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhxrw1cpHdk

"i'm gonna grab holda your lips"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tr1pq2wMux0

The one where he calls Sam Goody to ask about the "great buns" videotape, and his pronunciation of "awesome," has been making me laugh all day.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=quqdjd4tOLI

yeah he'll get into some kinda weird pronunciation on a call, like sometimes he really exaggerates "li-yup" like "I'll bust yr li-yup" and it cracks me up so much

"this is an unlisted number"
"like hell it is"

https://youtu.be/464i66_mgL4

i'm calling it now, this thread is my favorite discovery of 2017. not sure how i've never heard this before but i've been obsessed for the past several weeks.

"shehheh... i'll crush your skull, with one punch, one punch... shehh"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxG3HyPhgXY

This is a masterpiece of linguistic parkour

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XR8xCM0dSLY

That one's like the prank call equivalent of a Xenakis score

And then he throws Arthur in

Otm on Xenakis. This is high art. Serialist prank. Unique.

The teary eyed one is so funny, love how the woman laughs so much

Love how the caller recognizes him at 3:50

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFtoEiUAO7Q

"I've got a seeing eye falcon..."

JUMPING UP AND DOWN, SIR
UP AND DOWN THE STREEEEET
WHERE AH YOOUU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaPgZ_Da32E

i get a kick out of him getting recognized. there's a call in the new one like that- any others beyond that and the one above?

Dag... think there's one on 8 or 9 where he's calling a bunch of record stores and someone recognizes him and says "LPC IN THE HOUSE!"

I love the one in 13 - the way LPC reacts cracks me up. And I'm still trying to figure out of the guy who votes for Billy Dee is someone famous.

ok but my tripler is gonna end up multiplying my couple, you understand? so my signal will be coupled with the flipper.

"you should onion up your face"

god this is killing me

"what's with the voice manipulator?"
"I got a new phone"

haha

http://talkinwhipapedia.wikia.com/wiki/Category:Calls_in_which_LPC_is_recognized

A) why do people transcribe his calls?
B) why do I still laugh when I read them?

"This is freaking Benedict, dude."

Uh, I don't know who you are.

"That's who I am, dude. And you're gonna know all about me."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUkXn_4ZFJY&t=3222s

I reallylike the three way calls

Am I the only one that isn't showing up for? I mean I get the placeholder but then I just get an error message.

i'm guessing it's the trebek and 'mr .beauprex' call from the latest?

i need a brooom

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mSJR9pf0bw

SQUAWKBOX!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrBufBilYDw

[5:00]
'You guys snortin' smoke upair? You guys stand by yer work upair?'
'You know you sound like you got a dick in your mouth'
'Ok, well that's unprofessional, strikingly unprofessional'

And at 8:23, 'Camacho' trying to sell an lsd comic book about Kiss - 'Kiss, the demons of rock' - has me in stitches. 'What's the trouble upair?'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8zJ25Y_MA4

realy enjoying this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6f9ZOfO_MbQ

you know you're either jacked up on marijuana or POT, and i just traced your number you son of a bitch

pretty disturbing how that one caller seems terrified

during the guacamole advice?