The scrotum thread

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take a small pick and hack away the surrounding sandstone

mullygrubber (gaz), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:45 (twenty years ago) link

balls? yeah sure is. they seem so delicate or something. It's like an achilles heel hanging off the front of you.

ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:46 (twenty years ago) link

They may be cool, but I'd never put them in my mouth. They look like some hairy, eyeless monsters from a children's TV show.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:46 (twenty years ago) link

But i thought boys would like that?

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:46 (twenty years ago) link

in mouth? I've never had a guy ask me to do that...not that it would bother me.

ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:47 (twenty years ago) link

in mouth? it feel nice.

mullygrubber (gaz), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:48 (twenty years ago) link

It's like an achilles heel hanging off the front of you.

It sure is! The pain you feel when they're hurt is unlike any other form of pain. I suspect it's got something to do with the evolution biology and the instinct of producing offspring, that you want to protect them more than any other part of your body.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:49 (twenty years ago) link

Yes in mouth!

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:49 (twenty years ago) link

i never get all this worry about losing sperm count because of briefs and drinking mello-yellow. it just goes back up when you stop. it's actually a proven method of birth control. sinch those suckers up there real tight and you can do away with condoms forever.

AaronK (AaronK), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:50 (twenty years ago) link

also "ask"

mullygrubber (gaz), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:50 (twenty years ago) link

I've never been asked to do it, I mean, it can be a bit tricky!

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:50 (twenty years ago) link

I wouldn't trust my girlfriend with them in her mouth. You do know how they castrate piglets, don't you?

sam therapy, Friday, 16 April 2004 12:51 (twenty years ago) link

Wow, I feel so connected to all the males on the board or something. It's almost like having my own dick.

ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:51 (twenty years ago) link

Now how great would that be for a day!!

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:53 (twenty years ago) link

Scrotums are the touchy-feely way to talk about male bits. They're all vulnerable and timid, unlike the erect penis.

sam therapy, Friday, 16 April 2004 12:54 (twenty years ago) link

im not too keen on the balls in the mouth thing.

Chris 'The Velvet Bingo' V (Chris V), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:55 (twenty years ago) link

to be honest me neither.

ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:56 (twenty years ago) link

so what do you boys want us ladeez to do with them then?

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:56 (twenty years ago) link

Oh dear, I should go back to study for tomorrow's exam, but it's hard to concentrate on Aristothelian ethics after all these balls.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:56 (twenty years ago) link

heh, i didn't know you were a lady till now pinkpanther :)

ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:57 (twenty years ago) link

my wife and i aren't making porno's we are trying to make a baby. and since when does balls in the mouth impregnate a woman. if it did, i probably have about 35 kids from my college days.

Chris 'The Velvet Bingo' V (Chris V), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:57 (twenty years ago) link

so what do you boys want us ladeez to do with them then?

Gentle licking is nice, you might accidentally get too ruff with your fingers.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:58 (twenty years ago) link

i'm not calling for lengthy ball s**king here! but a bit of attention whilst yer down there is nice!

mullygrubber (gaz), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:58 (twenty years ago) link

really? I never knew it was so....uhh...U&K

ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:59 (twenty years ago) link

Cup them gently.

sam therapy, Friday, 16 April 2004 12:59 (twenty years ago) link

I like it when my sack makes a bat wing.

Chris 'The Velvet Bingo' V (Chris V), Friday, 16 April 2004 12:59 (twenty years ago) link

o yeah

mullygrubber (gaz), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:00 (twenty years ago) link

goodness, i've got a week to catch up on my sexual technique. I'm totally relying on you guys.

ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:01 (twenty years ago) link

The main thing is you have to very gentle. Girls are often too rough with the little man and his two mates.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:05 (twenty years ago) link

Scrotums are cool, scrotums are groovy
They don\\\'t make a noise while you\\\'re watching a movie

deep sea jiver, Friday, 16 April 2004 13:06 (twenty years ago) link

"have to be"

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:06 (twenty years ago) link

This reminds me of something a guy I once knew used to say when trying to impress upon people his wider experience of the world:

"Listen son, I was in Baghdad before you were out of your Dad's bag"

Rather topical too.

Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:09 (twenty years ago) link

:-(

I read in a book that you should make a ring (with your fingers) around the top & give them a little tug! Oh how I laughed!

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:09 (twenty years ago) link

Oops, I didnt mean to scare you lot off!

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:18 (twenty years ago) link

I don't know, no one's ever done that to me. Doesn't sound particularly enjoyable.

What sort of a book it was, if I may ask?

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:47 (twenty years ago) link

Was it written by Andrea Dworkin by any chance?

Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 16 April 2004 13:51 (twenty years ago) link

So, I come back from reading Aristotle, and find out that no one wants to talk about scrotum any longer?

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 15:48 (twenty years ago) link

This is not the thread for talk about Aristotle.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 16 April 2004 15:52 (twenty years ago) link

It isn't, I meant that it presented a nice alternative to reading Aristotle. But I guess I'll have to return to the old, ball-les Greek chap.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 15:56 (twenty years ago) link

True, these days he would indeed lack that, as well as much other bodily integrity.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 16 April 2004 15:56 (twenty years ago) link

I guess I'm being unfair, though, those old Greek chaps paid a lot attention to balls, as well as to other things penile. I just wish Aristotle would've written less about ethics and more about balls.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 16:00 (twenty years ago) link

That was what was in the lost book about comedy. The Name of the Rose would have been a lot different if William of Baskerville had gotten the book from Jose only to discover it was nothing but jokes about scrota and ball-punching between two guys named Ephrates and Xenocrates.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 16 April 2004 16:01 (twenty years ago) link

fifteen years pass...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hcrdjn33h-4

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Wednesday, 25 March 2020 14:19 (four years ago) link

great revive

Le Bateau Ivre, Wednesday, 25 March 2020 14:19 (four years ago) link

ffs

a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 25 March 2020 14:20 (four years ago) link


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