just watched the trailer
kids, don't do scientology
keira, never act again
― Dave Plaintive rapper with classical training (imago), Wednesday, 7 December 2016 00:22 (seven years ago) link
The movie title has been created by the early 90's software used to make Basic Instinct/Primal Fear/Fatal Instinct/Terminal Velocity etc
― calzino, Wednesday, 7 December 2016 21:31 (seven years ago) link
Another awful trailer: Why Him?
― rhymes with "blondie blast" (cryptosicko), Monday, 12 December 2016 16:13 (seven years ago) link
This is even more ridiculous than I expected.
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2016/dec/13/collateral-beauty-review-will-smith-helen-mirren-keira-knightley
Will Smith plays a super-brilliant ad exec with a Ted-talking visionary schtick about connectivity. But when he tragically loses his six-year-old to cancer, poor Will becomes a mumbling semi-crazy hermit who is in danger of running his company into the ground. He starts writing letters to abstract concepts like Death, Love and Time, to rail at them. So his sorrowing colleagues – Ed Norton, Kate Winslet and Michael Peña – cook up a sneaky plan. They intercept the letters and hire three actors, played by Helen Mirren, Keira Knightley and Jacob Latimore, to go up to Will in the street and argue with him, pretending to be Death, Love and Time. (They could also have hired Jack Black to be Eat and Morgan Freeman to be Pray – but I guess there were copyright issues.) Ed, Kate and Michael will secretly video his arguments with these imposters, digitally remove the actors from the video to make him look like a crazy person talking to himself, then show the video to the board to get Will voted off.
Ed, Kate and Michael will secretly video his arguments with these imposters, digitally remove the actors from the video to make him look like a crazy person talking to himself, then show the video to the board to get Will voted off.
― jmm, Tuesday, 13 December 2016 20:54 (seven years ago) link
Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me.
― The Pleasure Principal (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 13 December 2016 20:57 (seven years ago) link
In a just world, this would extinguish the career of everyone involved. But I think we just found our Best Picture Oscar winner!
― The Pleasure Principal (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 13 December 2016 20:58 (seven years ago) link
Sully looks like weaponised boring
also a shitty kids author got her butler to write the word "pokemon" on a napkin and gave herself the rest of the year off & now people are acting surprised that the result is kind of a nothing film
― banfred bann (wins), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 06:59 (seven years ago) link
Helen Mirren is the tragedy here. I could see signing onto this mess for the cashola, but this is not a hit movie by any means!
You'd like to think your favorite actors possessed somr trace of taste and discernment. For instance I thought I detected intelligence and shrewdness in the eyes of Jessica Chastain, which led me to check out Miss Sloane last week. What am embarrassment. Again, not a blockbuster formula there, so she had to think this was gonna be Good. Oh that script. Hardest I've cringed since my first exposure to the work of Diablo Cody.
― rip van wanko, Wednesday, 14 December 2016 07:32 (seven years ago) link
I'm sort of fascinated by Collateral Beauty now. What a weird premise/way of conceiving trauma. The Village Voice review teases that there are two additional twists beyond "They're actors."
― jmm, Wednesday, 14 December 2016 15:41 (seven years ago) link
Oh boy twists
― banfred bann (wins), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:46 (seven years ago) link
that's where I was a Viking all along
― banfred bann (wins), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:47 (seven years ago) link
shall we guess the twists
― Dave Plaintive rapper with classical training (imago), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:51 (seven years ago) link
JACKIE
― Supercreditor (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:52 (seven years ago) link
if you watch it numb yourself with vodka, cigarettes, and photos of Bobby
― The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:52 (seven years ago) link
― banfred bann (wins), Wednesday, December 14, 2016
he said last night
― The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:53 (seven years ago) link
Bobby Kennedy looked like Bugs Bunny
― Supercreditor (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:54 (seven years ago) link
let's not spoil ourselves
― banfred bann (wins), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:55 (seven years ago) link
twist one: will smith himself secretly put up his colleagues to do this (by idk INCEPTION), so he could teach THEM a lesson
twist two: the letters were all christmas cards
― Dave Plaintive rapper with classical training (imago), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 16:56 (seven years ago) link
I'm guessing: (1) The actors turn out really to be abstract manifestations. (2) They're joined at the end by his daughter's ghost for tearful closure.
― jmm, Wednesday, 14 December 2016 17:01 (seven years ago) link
i'm thinking that yeah, like the letters will smith writes are sort of spectral spirit versions of the nanny letter the kids write in mary poppins.
― nomar, Wednesday, 14 December 2016 17:03 (seven years ago) link
I should just put [insert the name of latest Oscar-bait biopic here] now so i don't have to bump this thread every year 'round this time.
― rhymes with "blondie blast" (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 17:05 (seven years ago) link
xxpost I agree with (1) but I think (2) is a fourth-wall breaking moment where we see the screenwriter finishing the script and then masturbating to completion onto the keyboard of his Macbook.
― The Pleasure Principal (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 17:05 (seven years ago) link
It's definitely a case of each quality being bestowed to the respectively needful colleague tbh, the devil is in how it turns around
maybe will smith himself is a paranormal manifestation and his 'dead daughter' is us, the viewers
― Dave Plaintive rapper with classical training (imago), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 17:08 (seven years ago) link
La La Land
Both Gosling and Stone are such weird looking folks. Like living anime. Dunno if I could deal with two hours of them trying to save their love through song and dance.
― Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Wednesday, 14 December 2016 19:38 (seven years ago) link
trainspotting 2: judgement day
― forgive me fader for I have sinned (wins), Sunday, 18 December 2016 15:52 (seven years ago) link
Sing
― rhymes with "blondie blast" (cryptosicko), Monday, 19 December 2016 16:21 (seven years ago) link
Split.
― some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Sunday, 15 January 2017 06:53 (seven years ago) link
Yeah was surprised the director was getting financed. Thought he was getting critically panned. Are people going to his films still? Though Guardian had a 2 page article based on multiple personality with photos from film on Friday.
― Stevolende, Sunday, 15 January 2017 07:50 (seven years ago) link
Haha, this thing cost $125 million?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moZIiYxUsGw
― jmm, Monday, 16 January 2017 20:41 (seven years ago) link
Not one but TWO TV remakes out this week: Chips and Power Rangers.
― some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Thursday, 23 March 2017 01:48 (seven years ago) link
That Trump-ian baby movie from Dreamworks.
― some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Thursday, 30 March 2017 20:49 (seven years ago) link
haha I saw chips
― a Brazilian professional footballer (wins), Thursday, 30 March 2017 20:50 (seven years ago) link
was not good
― a Brazilian professional footballer (wins), Thursday, 30 March 2017 20:51 (seven years ago) link
Hampstead looks p rancid
Haha so I have a valid NUS card and so I get invited to free preview screenings of films aimed at 19-year-olds, I'm sad enough that I usually go to them and they are nearly always dogshit
Tonight I went to see The House and the place was about 3/4 full. There were flyers on the seats saying "why not head on up to the bar afterwards for an exclusive playthrough of the new Gorillaz album" & also advertising a heavily discounted night owl showing of baby driver. The film, which wasn't great, finished and nobody - not one soul - headed on up to the bar, they all just fucked off. I got a cheap ticket for what's turned out to be a private screening of baby driver (the only circumstance under which I would bother) and am killing time in the pub below. I find this whole experience pretty heartening
― blog haus aka the scene raver (wins), Thursday, 29 June 2017 22:29 (six years ago) link
The Battle of the Sexes
― the general theme of STUFF (cryptosicko), Thursday, 7 September 2017 15:57 (six years ago) link
yeah, by the Little Miss Sunshine crew no less
― ice cream social justice (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 7 September 2017 16:03 (six years ago) link
Downsizing
― Anne of the Thousand Gays (Eric H.), Thursday, 7 September 2017 16:36 (six years ago) link
yikes, that Borg-McEnroe movie w/ Shia as Johnny Mac
― ice cream social justice (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 9 September 2017 14:49 (six years ago) link
The garbage I am proud to say I avoided/will avoid:
Mother!Blade RunnerDunkirk
― xyzzzz__, Tuesday, 3 October 2017 10:25 (six years ago) link
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Snowman_(2017_film)
― johnny crunch, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 14:06 (six years ago) link
Premise [edit]When Harry Hole
And here I stopped reading.
― Anne of the Thousand Gays (Eric H.), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 14:11 (six years ago) link
It's okay, it's a Norwegian thing.
Harry Hole (pronounced "Harry HOO-LEH") is the main character in a series of crime novels written by Norwegian author Jo Nesbø.[1]
― jmm, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 15:24 (six years ago) link
I already wasn't interested in that new Clooney thing, but after the 80th forced ad for it on Spotify this week, I'm now dead set against it.
― iCloudius (cryptosicko), Friday, 20 October 2017 17:33 (six years ago) link
all of them
ban hollywood
― clouds, Friday, 20 October 2017 21:47 (six years ago) link
The Death of Stalin
― xyzzzz__, Sunday, 22 October 2017 13:25 (six years ago) link
The Lion King (Jon Favreau-directed 'live action' remake, 2019)
― iCloudius (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 1 November 2017 23:06 (six years ago) link
Clouds otm
― brimstead, Wednesday, 1 November 2017 23:13 (six years ago) link
Why I felt the need to post that I have no idea. Solidarity!
― brimstead, Wednesday, 1 November 2017 23:14 (six years ago) link
i cracked up at the trailer for the snowman. and they actually pronounce 'harry hole' like you'd think it would be pronounced.
― Einstein, Bazinga, Sitar (abanana), Friday, 3 November 2017 02:04 (six years ago) link
This review makes it sound like an absolutely hot mess.
― iCloudius (cryptosicko), Friday, 3 November 2017 02:26 (six years ago) link